₦airaland Forum

Love800:
That is nature always dealing with men. Fathers really don not mark any presence in the boy-child life, so nothing the boy will learn from him, further when they grow up, they leave daddy.

You can reverse this sha, if you are so intentional with your baby-boys life.

Kalatium:
There’s a man in my neighborhood whose story has stayed with me.

Years ago, his home was a hub of life. Teenagers everywhere. Music blasting. Laughter spilling into the street. Young boys full of promise, respect, and energy. A mother holding the center. A family in motion.

Fast forward to today and the house is silent.

One son is gone. Another has relocated. The wife and daughters have moved on. What remains is a man sitting alone behind a gate, cooking for himself, washing his own clothes, watching the days pass without the noise that once defined his life.

This is a reality we rarely discuss.

We talk about career growth. We talk about wealth. We talk about legacy.

But we almost never talk about male loneliness in old age.

For many men, life slowly narrows: Children grow up. Homes empty out. Visits reduce. Attention fades.

Mothers are remembered, celebrated, visited with gifts and affection. Fathers, too often, are left behind quietly enduring, saying little, asking for nothing, but feeling everything.

This isn’t about blame. It’s about awareness.

Sons: Your father may not say much. He may act distant or grumpy. But he wants connection too. He wants to feel seen.

Daughters: Celebrate your fathers, not just on special days, but in ordinary moments. Presence matters more than presents.

Fathers: Be kind to your wives. Be warm with your children. Emotional deposits made today compound in old age.

Because here’s the uncomfortable truth: No promotion, no achievement, no title prepares a man for an empty house.

Old age doesn’t arrive suddenly, it creeps in quietly.

And how we love, show up, and stay connected today determines whether later years feel full… or painfully hollow.

This is not just a family issue. It’s a societal one.

Let’s do better while there’s still time.

Kalatium:
There’s a man in my neighborhood whose story has stayed with me.

Years ago, his home was a hub of life. Teenagers everywhere. Music blasting. Laughter spilling into the street. Young boys full of promise, respect, and energy. A mother holding the center. A family in motion.

Fast forward to today and the house is silent.

One son is gone. Another has relocated. The wife and daughters have moved on. What remains is a man sitting alone behind a gate, cooking for himself, washing his own clothes, watching the days pass without the noise that once defined his life.

This is a reality we rarely discuss.

We talk about career growth. We talk about wealth. We talk about legacy.

But we almost never talk about male loneliness in old age.

For many men, life slowly narrows: Children grow up. Homes empty out. Visits reduce. Attention fades.

Mothers are remembered, celebrated, visited with gifts and affection. Fathers, too often, are left behind quietly enduring, saying little, asking for nothing, but feeling everything.

This isn’t about blame. It’s about awareness.

Sons: Your father may not say much. He may act distant or grumpy. But he wants connection too. He wants to feel seen.

Daughters: Celebrate your fathers, not just on special days, but in ordinary moments. Presence matters more than presents.

Fathers: Be kind to your wives. Be warm with your children. Emotional deposits made today compound in old age.

Because here’s the uncomfortable truth: No promotion, no achievement, no title prepares a man for an empty house.

Old age doesn’t arrive suddenly, it creeps in quietly.

And how we love, show up, and stay connected today determines whether later years feel full… or painfully hollow.

This is not just a family issue. It’s a societal one.

Let’s do better while there’s still time.

Trymeee:
Truth is their is nothing in marriage for an average man. Maybe to help the woman raise the kids. How do I mean, most kids sees and takes care of their mums before the dad's (if at all the dad) I will always tell most married men I see to invest into their future and not make any child or wife their plans or hope for happiness. Marry as much wives if it makes you happy Las Las, one of them will always be there.

Omalicious1:

As a man, the modern-day society is rigged against men. As a man, you will always be left alone because you're loved based on conditions, and once you can't meet those conditions, you will be left alone. What I would suggest is that, men should start now to build systems and communities that will still keep them bubbling with life even at old age.

Love800:
That is nature always dealing with men. Fathers really don not mark any presence in the boy-child life, so nothing the boy will learn from him, further when they grow up, they leave daddy.

You can reverse this sha, if you are so intentional with your baby-boys life.

gerizzim:
it all starts from how well we bond well with our children and loved ones.

Most father's that are hard hit are those that are always too serious and too strict with their kids up even till when they are mature.

Too much of shouting ,insults and derogatory remarks at them creates a cold relationship btw father and child. Even before that child bcoms an adult, he has already left the huz.

When these children leave the house through marriage, they rarely get in touch as they should . To them leaving the house is like a big relief for them.

It is good parents esp father's should relax their grip a bit on their children when they come up of age. Relate with them more like a friend . Be there for them.

Host78:
One thing I've come to understand is all men eventually realize this.

Some wey dey carry their mama for head go later realise say them go dey the same situation as their father one day.

Every hustle for mama is sweet to type.

Until all your own children start typing and showing the same thing.

Every guy complaining here neglected their own father's, are neglecting their father's or planning to.

Until their children start doing the same thing.

Your wife or sister will give birth and instead of nanny, you'll carry your mother, leaving your father all alone.

Your mother will spend not 1 month, not 2 or 3 but might stay one or two years doing omugwo and you don't care how your father is faring.

Men by all means are the enablers of their fathers loneliness and neglect in old age.

And they don't care until they understand that they will be in the same position later in life.

And it won't matter how much you loved your wife or the kids.

See young guys today. All they say is "the hustle is for mama"

And they don't bother to think "how will my own kids say or behave any different?"

The family is not for men until young men start reflecting on their behaviors.

Amumaigwe:
You even have time to notice that bitter evening Newspaper. An Ignore serves her real good.

Trymeee:
Truth is their is nothing in marriage for an average man. Maybe to help the woman raise the kids. How do I mean, most kids sees and takes care of their mums before the dad's (if at all the dad) I will always tell most married men I see to invest into their future and not make any child or wife their plans or hope for happiness. Marry as much wives if it makes you happy Las Las, one of them will always be there.

Trymeee:
Kobojunkie, for my sanity, peace of mind and mental health, always do well to avoid any comment, post or mention of my moniker.


Have a great life.

gift2xl:
Always prepare for your old age, try to put things in place that will sustain your life and do not depend on your children.

In conclusion treat your wife well always.

Dancebreaker:
People are saying treat your wife well.

As a young man, husband and father, you must be out there struggling to earn a living. To provide and raise the family. You will most naturally be absent most of the day as you hustle.

Monogamy is dealing with men too. In the past, a man of 69 might still have a wife as young as 37.
So throughout his life, there will be a spouse and teenagers present. Not only a woman of 66 who is only interested in doing omugo up and down.

As we copy oyinbo monogamy, we must remember we have no care homes or social safety system of the West in old age.

What is the benefit of polygamy for the senior wife? The younger co-wife and her kids become the helpers to the man and the elderly wife. Because the senior kids will have married and left home.

Otherwise, with one wife and 2.35 kids on average, every man lucky enough to live into old age will suffer it. Even money alone can't solve, though it helps.

No matter a man's sacrifices, in old age, OYO. Darkie copy oyinbo without thinking deep.

Also, if we reference Lalami321, if some of the kids are not yours to begin with. No connection.

Kalatium:
There’s a man in my neighborhood whose story has stayed with me.

Years ago, his home was a hub of life. Teenagers everywhere. Music blasting. Laughter spilling into the street. Young boys full of promise, respect, and energy. A mother holding the center. A family in motion.

Fast forward to today and the house is silent.

One son is gone. Another has relocated. The wife and daughters have moved on. What remains is a man sitting alone behind a gate, cooking for himself, washing his own clothes, watching the days pass without the noise that once defined his life.

This is a reality we rarely discuss.

We talk about career growth. We talk about wealth. We talk about legacy.

But we almost never talk about male loneliness in old age.

For many men, life slowly narrows: Children grow up. Homes empty out. Visits reduce. Attention fades.

Mothers are remembered, celebrated, visited with gifts and affection. Fathers, too often, are left behind quietly enduring, saying little, asking for nothing, but feeling everything.

This isn’t about blame. It’s about awareness.

Sons: Your father may not say much. He may act distant or grumpy. But he wants connection too. He wants to feel seen.

Daughters: Celebrate your fathers, not just on special days, but in ordinary moments. Presence matters more than presents.

Fathers: Be kind to your wives. Be warm with your children. Emotional deposits made today compound in old age.

Because here’s the uncomfortable truth: No promotion, no achievement, no title prepares a man for an empty house.

Old age doesn’t arrive suddenly, it creeps in quietly.

And how we love, show up, and stay connected today determines whether later years feel full… or painfully hollow.

This is not just a family issue. It’s a societal one.

Let’s do better while there’s still time.

Love800:
That is nature always dealing with men. Fathers really don not mark any presence in the boy-child life, so nothing the boy will learn from him, further when they grow up, they leave daddy.

You can reverse this sha, if you are so intentional with your baby-boys life.

epainos:
Reality is around. Things you must learn:

1. A skill to make income during old age, or an investment that pays through to the end.
2. Practise staying alone from when you are young. . Even our society encourages men to be useless to themselves in home affairs. Plates, they can't wash. Common eba, they can't make. See them jumping around and eating like gluttons when their women are busy or not around. After the death of a wife, na family sef go spoil them and even not allow them to stay alone for a period of time But na lie. Na money wey family wan collect from them. A man cannot take care of the kids if the wife passes to glory. But they see it an abomination for the woman to remarry after 5 years the man don kpai.
3. And many more.

No go master being alone and cooking for yourself. Dey find kids who will be listening to your sad stories around.

4. No go develop your health and care homes...make una dey keep looting the national treasury. You will all learn by force.

lagonovo:
Exactly, your last line is key.

Solitude is a good thing, people just need to find purpose at each stage of life before it's over. I know many old folks with no family but with their days loaded with all sorts of activities at private and group levels.

You've made a point there. Appreciated

Kalatium:
There’s a man in my neighborhood whose story has stayed with me.

Years ago, his home was a hub of life. Teenagers everywhere. Music blasting. Laughter spilling into the street. Young boys full of promise, respect, and energy. A mother holding the center. A family in motion.

Fast forward to today and the house is silent.

One son is gone. Another has relocated. The wife and daughters have moved on. What remains is a man sitting alone behind a gate, cooking for himself, washing his own clothes, watching the days pass without the noise that once defined his life.

This is a reality we rarely discuss.

We talk about career growth. We talk about wealth. We talk about legacy.

But we almost never talk about male loneliness in old age.

For many men, life slowly narrows: Children grow up. Homes empty out. Visits reduce. Attention fades.

Mothers are remembered, celebrated, visited with gifts and affection. Fathers, too often, are left behind quietly enduring, saying little, asking for nothing, but feeling everything.

This isn’t about blame. It’s about awareness.

Sons: Your father may not say much. He may act distant or grumpy. But he wants connection too. He wants to feel seen.

Daughters: Celebrate your fathers, not just on special days, but in ordinary moments. Presence matters more than presents.

Fathers: Be kind to your wives. Be warm with your children. Emotional deposits made today compound in old age.

Because here’s the uncomfortable truth: No promotion, no achievement, no title prepares a man for an empty house.

Old age doesn’t arrive suddenly, it creeps in quietly.

And how we love, show up, and stay connected today determines whether later years feel full… or painfully hollow.

This is not just a family issue. It’s a societal one.

Let’s do better while there’s still time.

Love800:
That is nature always dealing with men. Fathers really don not mark any presence in the boy-child life, so nothing the boy will learn from him, further when they grow up, they leave daddy.

You can reverse this sha, if you are so intentional with your baby-boys life.