Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? - Romance

Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? - Romance - Nairaland

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Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Chijeep(op): 12:12pm On Dec 14, 2025

Please help me(mature minds only)

After getting tired of the flaws discovered from most city girls I decided this mid-year to go my village to get a lady for marriage. And with the help of my cousin sister I was able to get this particular girl (Judith) and she agreed in the sense that she's also very much ready to settle down.

Everything was going perfectly so I decided to go and see her in person so that we can proceed to the next stage which I went and she introduced me to her mom.

Her mother's reaction showed that they both liked and welcomed me as a proposed inlaw. So we move on, and I came back to my Base to inform my dad and my dad didn't say No. And I let her know that everything is good at my own side too. That we're good to go.

So this faithful mind pressured me to test this girl's loyalty to me and the relationship (because atimes she used to say something like; guys use to approached her for marriage and she rejected).

So 1 day I used a fake fb account to chat her up and to cut the story short she said she's not in any relationship, nor married and she agreed to meet the other fake guy I used. She told the guy (because I asked if I could meet her people when I come) that they shouldn't rush things that it should be a gradual process.

And went ahead to send the guy her number and even her picture. But she told the guy that nothing like having s3x. And after there chat I confronted her myself saying that she failed my test and she fuvk up. Buh she started explaining but I was highly disappointed. And she went ahead to inform my cousin sister to apologise to me on her hehalf and also told her friend to chat me and apologise.

NOW MY COUSIN SISTER TOLD ME TO FORGIVE AND MOVE ON WITH HER BUT HER MOTHER IS NOW GETTING ANGRY AT ME THAT I OVER ACTED TO THE ISSUE.

PLEASE IS IT NOT A RED FLAG ENOUGH TO QUIT OR GET ANGRY OR WAS MY TESTING NOT NECESSARY AS HER FRIEND WAS EVEN SAYING THAT; WHO'S TESTING GIRLS LOYALTY IN THIS AGE OF LIFE.

Please I need a nice answers because I'm very much ready to settle down.

5 Likes

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by always247: 12:21pm On Dec 14, 2025

why did you test her? you don fk up. grin

never test Nigerian girl again weather she is city or village girl. humans not just females are not loyal.

116 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Chijeep(op): 12:24pm On Dec 14, 2025

always247:
why did you test her? you don fk up.
never test Nigerian girl again weather she is city or village girl. humans not just females are not loyal.

I was having some doubts about her loyalty because I'm not friendly with long distance relationship

19 Likes

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Namaster: 12:25pm On Dec 14, 2025

RUN!

Her mother is ANGRY at you for being angry at her daughter's INFIDELITY.

RUN!

This woman will help her daughter to ABORT a pregnancy that resulted from her daughter's INFIDELITY.

Plus, you haven't mentioned the FATHER.
So she sounds like a SINGLE MOTHER.

AVOID single mothers!
AVOID the daughters of single mothers.

RUN!

194 Likes 7 Shares

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by brain54(m): 12:27pm On Dec 14, 2025

Why did you test her if you can't take actions based on her test results...?

After testing her you are still coming to ask for advice. You should have a marking scheme and the test should have decided if she passed or failed. So you take a decision based on that.

Now you are asking us again...are you testing us?

265 Likes 9 Shares

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Jeromejnr(m): 12:48pm On Dec 14, 2025

Can you mention the flaws you discovered in most city girls.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Saybal(m): 1:02pm On Dec 14, 2025

You don't know anything ,even if you ask for her nude she will send it ,so far money is involved ,you want her to be loyal to you ,is she having a good work ,you don't know relationship is the work of most of these ladies

52 Likes 1 Share

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Sonnobax15(m): 1:14pm On Dec 14, 2025

Can any man here boast of his girlfriend? angry

. That she wouldn't fall for this ? Personally, I've tested my own once ,and she fell for it....... Exactly the same way that the op's girlfriend did to him....In fact,from that day,I lost a very huge percentage of my trust on her angry

. And from that the same day,I swore never to trust any woman.

The truth is that, don't put your entire trust on any human,be it a man or a woman...

89 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Chijeep(op): 1:31pm On Dec 14, 2025

Namaster:
RUN!

Her mother is ANGRY at you for being angry at her daughter's INFIDELITY.

RUN!

This woman will help her daughter to ABORT a pregnancy that resulted from her daughter's INFIDELITY.

Plus, you haven't mentioned the FATHER.
So she sounds like a SINGLE MOTHER.

AVOID single mothers!
AVOID the daughters of single mothers.

RUN!

The father is late.
Died 6yrs ago

5 Likes

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Chijeep(op): 1:33pm On Dec 14, 2025

Jeromejnr:
Can you mention the flaws you discovered in most city girls.

Double dating.
Loving u only bcoz of wat dey get from u.
Demanding too mch.

25 Likes 1 Share

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Chijeep(op): 1:34pm On Dec 14, 2025

brain54:
Why did you test her if you can't take actions based on her test results...?

After testing her you are still coming to ask for advice. You should have a marking scheme and the test should have decided if she passed or failed. So you take a decision based on that.

Now you are asking us again...are you testing us?

My cousin sister said I should forgive her.
And besides, she made it clear 2 the person that she don't want s3x

1 Like

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by brain54(m): 1:50pm On Dec 14, 2025

Chijeep:
My cousin sister said I should forgive her.
And besides, she made it clear 2 the person that she don't want s3x

Your cousin has adviced but you still want more advice...

Even after the test? What were you expecting her to say she wanted sex from a random stranger she was just meeting?

Well, I don't know what to advise you honestly about this kind of matter. It's really up to you and what you want. Just stick to your guts and what you think!

29 Likes

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Baronthecelebri(m): 1:53pm On Dec 14, 2025

Don't go ahead with her, abort mission

11 Likes

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by ogaprime(m): 2:15pm On Dec 14, 2025

Ogbeni, how more red do you want the flag to be before you take reverse and run away?

20 Likes

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by tanigororo: 2:40pm On Dec 14, 2025*

Chijeep:
Please help me(mature minds only)
After getting tired of the flaws discovered from most city girls I decided this mid-year to go my village to get a lady for marriage. And with the help of my cousin sister I was able to get this particular girl(Judith) and she agreed in the sense that she's also very much ready to settle down.
Everything was going perfectly so I decided to go and see her in person so that we can proceed to the next stage which I went and she introduced me to her mom.
Her mother's reaction showed that they both liked and welcomed me as a proposed inlaw. So we move on, and I came back to my Base to inform my dad and my dad didn't say No. And I let her know that everything is good at my own side too. That we're good to go.
So this faithful mind pressured me to test this girl's loyalty to me and the relationship(because atimes she used to say something like; guys use to approached her for marriage and she rejected). So 1 day I used a fake fb account to chat her up and to cut the story short she said she's not in any relationship, nor married and she agreed to meet the other fake guy I used. She told the guy(because I asked if I could meet her people when I come) that they shouldn't rush things that it should be a gradual process. And went ahead to send the guy her number and even her picture. But she told the guy that nothing like having s3x. And after there chat I confronted her myself saying that she failed my test and she fuvk up. Buh she started explaining but I was highly disappointed. And she went ahead to inform my cousin sister to apologise to me on her hehalf and also told her friend to chat me and apologise.
NOW MY COUSIN SISTER TOLD ME TO FORGIVE AND MOVE ON WITH HER BUT HER MOTHER IS NOW GETTING ANGRY AT ME THAT I OVER ACTED TO THE ISSUE.

PLEASE IS IT NOT A RED FLAG ENOUGH TO QUIT OR GET ANGRY OR WAS MY TESTING NOT NECESSARY AS HER FRIEND WAS EVEN SAYING THAT; WHO'S TESTING GIRLS LOYALTY IN THIS AGE OF LIFE.
Please I need a nice answers because I'm very much ready to settle down.

I am not sorry to say that you are fóòlish for testing her, it's a sign of insecurity and weakness. I can't blame you though because we have all been their.

You have not married her why expect anything from her, importantly you require her to be loyal not you forcing her loyalty.
Obviously you have over invest in the relationship, that's why you are pained so much.
Way forward
1. Require her (not asking her) to proof to you that she wants the relationship.
2. Require her to invest in the relationship
3. Don't take it (the Relationship) too serious

Note:
Require not Asking

15 Likes

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Nobody: 2:44pm On Dec 14, 2025

If you keep testing, I’m 100% sure you’ll never find a wife. Most Nigerian girls will fail loyalty test even with a ring on their finger. Just look for a woman that can train your kids and respect you. Once she’s given birth ensure you take care of the kids. Your purpose should be finding a good mother for your kids.

50 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by APOPTOSIS: 3:16pm On Dec 14, 2025

Chijeep:
Please help me(mature minds only)
After getting tired of the flaws discovered from most city girls I decided this mid-year to go my village to get a lady for marriage. And with the help of my cousin sister I was able to get this particular girl(Judith) and she agreed in the sense that she's also very much ready to settle down.
Everything was going perfectly so I decided to go and see her in person so that we can proceed to the next stage which I went and she introduced me to her mom.
Her mother's reaction showed that they both liked and welcomed me as a proposed inlaw. So we move on, and I came back to my Base to inform my dad and my dad didn't say No. And I let her know that everything is good at my own side too. That we're good to go.
So this faithful mind pressured me to test this girl's loyalty to me and the relationship(because atimes she used to say something like; guys use to approached her for marriage and she rejected). So 1 day I used a fake fb account to chat her up and to cut the story short she said she's not in any relationship, nor married and she agreed to meet the other fake guy I used. She told the guy(because I asked if I could meet her people when I come) that they shouldn't rush things that it should be a gradual process. And went ahead to send the guy her number and even her picture. But she told the guy that nothing like having s3x. And after there chat I confronted her myself saying that she failed my test and she fuvk up. Buh she started explaining but I was highly disappointed. And she went ahead to inform my cousin sister to apologise to me on her hehalf and also told her friend to chat me and apologise.
NOW MY COUSIN SISTER TOLD ME TO FORGIVE AND MOVE ON WITH HER BUT HER MOTHER IS NOW GETTING ANGRY AT ME THAT I OVER ACTED TO THE ISSUE.

PLEASE IS IT NOT A RED FLAG ENOUGH TO QUIT OR GET ANGRY OR WAS MY TESTING NOT NECESSARY AS HER FRIEND WAS EVEN SAYING THAT; WHO'S TESTING GIRLS LOYALTY IN THIS AGE OF LIFE.
Please I need a nice answers because I'm very much ready to settle down.

I read everything thoroughly
Now my question is:
What does she do for a living?
What do you think she would be bringing to the table in this marriage?
Does she look like someone that has anything special to lose after marriage ?
I ask these because these would be your consolation points when the real problem starts after marriage. U must hold onto something.
If u can enumerate all these positively, I will ask u to forgive her immediately.

Marriage is not a joke. 99% of the women unveil their real personality the moment you wife them. Even your mom & sisters know better. When testing next time, test someone like Dangote's daughter...in fact don't test that one, just dive in straight for that's how ladies would do if tables turn around. Wake up! Wake up!!
Wake up man! Wake up!

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by pointblank247(m): 4:43pm On Dec 14, 2025

Chijeep:
Please help me(mature minds only)
After getting tired of the flaws discovered from most city girls I decided this mid-year to go my village to get a lady for marriage. And with the help of my cousin sister I was able to get this particular girl(Judith) and she agreed in the sense that she's also very much ready to settle down.
Everything was going perfectly so I decided to go and see her in person so that we can proceed to the next stage which I went and she introduced me to her mom.
Her mother's reaction showed that they both liked and welcomed me as a proposed inlaw. So we move on, and I came back to my Base to inform my dad and my dad didn't say No. And I let her know that everything is good at my own side too. That we're good to go.
So this faithful mind pressured me to test this girl's loyalty to me and the relationship(because atimes she used to say something like; guys use to approached her for marriage and she rejected). So 1 day I used a fake fb account to chat her up and to cut the story short she said she's not in any relationship, nor married and she agreed to meet the other fake guy I used. She told the guy(because I asked if I could meet her people when I come) that they shouldn't rush things that it should be a gradual process. And went ahead to send the guy her number and even her picture. But she told the guy that nothing like having s3x. And after there chat I confronted her myself saying that she failed my test and she fuvk up. Buh she started explaining but I was highly disappointed. And she went ahead to inform my cousin sister to apologise to me on her hehalf and also told her friend to chat me and apologise.
NOW MY COUSIN SISTER TOLD ME TO FORGIVE AND MOVE ON WITH HER BUT HER MOTHER IS NOW GETTING ANGRY AT ME THAT I OVER ACTED TO THE ISSUE.

PLEASE IS IT NOT A RED FLAG ENOUGH TO QUIT OR GET ANGRY OR WAS MY TESTING NOT NECESSARY AS HER FRIEND WAS EVEN SAYING THAT; WHO'S TESTING GIRLS LOYALTY IN THIS AGE OF LIFE.
Please I need a nice answers because I'm very much ready to settle down.

thank God that she made it clear to the "other guy" that sex would not be involved, a condition she didn't give to you. Meaning, the "other guy" was just a plan B Incase you disappoint her. Most Nigerian girls watching Nollywood are like that. You are still the main guy in her life.

12 Likes

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by wildcatter23(m): 6:45pm On Dec 14, 2025*

I see absolutely nothing wrong with what the lady did. Infact you are the red flag!

Testing or tricking your fiance is born from a place of insecurity. Do you understand?

And the mother is correct. Why are you making a big deal out of nothing. If she is already married, I will be the first to come for her.

You are just in a relationship. So while at that, she is free to chat and explore her options. You too should be exploring your options.

Moreover, You haven't paid her dowry so she isn't yours yet. So you cannot claim double dating.

While you are looking out for yourself finding the right one, who said she can't look out for the right one for herself.

Guy, you see, a woman should exercise absolute prudence in picking a spouse.

If she chooses wrongly. She will spend her entire life ruing her choices. This is nothing new, expect you weren't experienced.

Heck, she told the fake you no sex.
So, why the fuss?

That's the best response you should be expecting.

As a woman or man, you should keep your options open.

It's up to you to take my advice or leave it.

33 Likes 1 Share

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Diamond098454(f): 7:12pm On Dec 14, 2025

Your insecurity is alarming and it's a sign of a weak man. You you you Mr tester hope you will pass when she test you in her own way?

You are not ready for marriage

3 Likes

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by essentialone(m): 7:14pm On Dec 14, 2025

Diamond098454:
Your insecurity is alarming and it's a sign of a weak man. You you you Mr tester hope you will pass when she test you in her own way?

You are not ready for marriage

Mr Tester. Hahahaha. Testing his microphone?

1 Like

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Diamond098454(f): 7:28pm On Dec 14, 2025

essentialone:
Mr Tester. Hahahaha. Testing his microphone?

essential..... Today is Sunday

Where's your girlfriend?

1 Like

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Saybal(m): 7:46pm On Dec 14, 2025

Chijeep:
My cousin sister said I should forgive her.
And besides, she made it clear 2 the person that she don't want s3x

you are still a learner ,I pity you

4 Likes

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by essentialone(m): 7:55pm On Dec 14, 2025

Diamond098454:
essential..... Today is Sunday

Where's your girlfriend?

I don't really have a girlfriend. Because we just doing some distance stuffs for now.

Hahahaha

1 Like

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Diamond098454(f): 7:57pm On Dec 14, 2025

essentialone:
I don't really have a girlfriend. Because we just doing some distance stuffs for now.

Hahahaha

I can imagine

1 Like

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by essentialone(m): 8:01pm On Dec 14, 2025

Diamond098454:
I can imagine

How has your day been dear?

1 Like

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Kobojunkie: 8:04pm On Dec 14, 2025

Chijeep:
➜Please help me(mature minds only)
After getting tired of the flaws discovered from most city girls I decided this mid-year to go my village to get a lady for marriage. And with the help of my cousin sister I was able to get this particular girl(Judith) and she agreed in the sense that she's also very much ready to settle down.
Everything was going perfectly so I decided to go and see her in person so that we can proceed to the next stage which I went and she introduced me to her mom.
Her mother's reaction showed that they both liked and welcomed me as a proposed inlaw. So we move on, and I came back to my Base to inform my dad and my dad didn't say No. And I let her know that everything is good at my own side too. That we're good to go.
So this faithful mind pressured me to test this girl's loyalty to me and the relationship(because atimes she used to say something like; guys use to approached her for marriage and she rejected). So 1 day I used a fake fb account to chat her up and to cut the story short she said she's not in any relationship, nor married and she agreed to meet the other fake guy I used. She told the guy(because I asked if I could meet her people when I come) that they shouldn't rush things that it should be a gradual process. And went ahead to send the guy her number and even her picture. But she told the guy that nothing like having s3x. And after there chat I confronted her myself saying that she failed my test and she fuvk up. Buh she started explaining but I was highly disappointed. And she went ahead to inform my cousin sister to apologise to me on her hehalf and also told her friend to chat me and apologise.
NOW MY COUSIN SISTER TOLD ME TO FORGIVE AND MOVE ON WITH HER BUT HER MOTHER IS NOW GETTING ANGRY AT ME THAT I OVER ACTED TO THE ISSUE.
PLEASE IS IT NOT A RED FLAG ENOUGH TO QUIT OR GET ANGRY OR WAS MY TESTING NOT NECESSARY AS HER FRIEND WAS EVEN SAYING THAT; WHO'S TESTING GIRLS LOYALTY IN THIS AGE OF LIFE. Please I need a nice answers because I'm very much ready to settle down.

You want a mechanical relationship, so I think you will have to continue to run tests like these, not just before the actual marriage but also throughout the duration of the marriage. If you are unwilling to seek out a person with whom you at least have some emotional and mental connection, I don't see any other way. I just pity that you will eventually exhaust yourself at some point. undecided

Well, a red flag is a red flag for sure. undecided

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Diamond098454(f): 8:07pm On Dec 14, 2025

essentialone:
How has your day been dear?

very well but I'm not really happy someone is planning to keep me in ph till 31st

I don't know what to do or say

1 Like

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by essentialone(m): 8:10pm On Dec 14, 2025

Diamond098454:
very well but I'm not really happy someone is planning to keep me in ph till 31st

I don't know what to do or say

If in one way or the other, that person has paid the price for you to remain in PH till 31st December, then...

Hahahaha

1 Like

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Diamond098454(f): 8:11pm On Dec 14, 2025

essentialone:
If in one way or the other, that person has paid the price for you to remain in PH till 31st December, then...

Hahahaha

you no well

1 Like

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by essentialone(m): 8:14pm On Dec 14, 2025

Diamond098454:
you no well

Hahahahhahaha. DD, I well ooo.

But I know no one can keep you back against your wish.

1 Like

Re: Red Flag Discovery Gone Wrong. Should I Still Continue This Relationship? by Diamond098454(f): 8:16pm On Dec 14, 2025

essentialone:
Hahahahhahaha. DD, I well ooo.

But I know no one can keep you back against your wish.

don't be too sure. Your gender are very stubborn

1 Like

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Reply

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