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Just rent apartments in the house and give your mom the one you want her to stay in,maybe a room or two and parlour self con she can accomodate her children there too,collecting the rent alone by your self shows everyone you're the owner and not gifted to anyone shaa. Because with renting some part you will have upper hand in setting principles in the house

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Op it good if your mom stays in the house, it also good that you knew the kind of bro you have. May your mom lives long,I hope your bro will not give you issues later in future. I would advise rent out the whole property and get nice flat for your mom

Chevrolet076:
What should I anticipate?

Go and rent a 2bedroom apartment for your mum in peace.

1 Your home is an example of what happens to children when a mother chooses to remain in an abusive marriage.

Your mother chose to endure an abusive marriage — physical, financial, and mental abuse at least — and ended up with nothing but trapped herself with 4 children. At the same time, the man still gets to walk away free to maybe start a new family with another woman elsewhere.

2. Worse, you, her son, physically assaulted/abused your 21-year-old brother, and are here telling us as though you did absolutely nothing wrong. What is sad is you probably also do not see that the reason you are fine with abusing your brother happens to be linked to the fact that you watched your father abuse your mother and maybe even your siblings for long enough to convince you that it is OK behavior, when it isn't.

Apologize to your brother and accept that he is not you and you are not him. Talk to him and listen carefully to what he has to say so you know for a fact whether he is, in fact, doing badly, or it is just your perception of things that has been clouding your judgment all this time. I made a similar mistake with my younger brother when I was around your age. But fortunately, I realized the error of my ways and decided to help my brother in his dreams after learning that he was not wrong in wanting to do his own thing.

As for your mother with her codependent clinging and enabling of him, I suggest you talk to her and cut her off if you have to, so she does not use your resources in supporting that which you don't like. My guess is she was probably born around the 1970s, like I was, meaning she is not too old to go get herself her own work and money. So, encourage her to go out there to find her own life now that she has removed the shackles of being married to abuse from herself.

3. The woman now sees you as a replacement for her husband; she had obsessively clung to your father for so long against common sense, feeling she deserved to reap something out of it, and probably now sees you as the one to give her all the love and care she was never able to receive from her husband. Very sad codependency situation going on here.

4. If you don't want a fight, you need to tell your mother the truth, and you need to let her know that she needs to face her situation as she ought to finally do so. 🥱🥱

5. If you love your mother, you should never allow her to go back to a man who abused her for so long. If you don't understand what abuse it and what it does to a person's mental, emotional, and physical well-being, I suggest you begin researching to learn the truth.

hakeemhakeem:
Op it good if your mom stays in the house, it also good that you knew the kind of bro you have. May your mom lives long,I hope your bro will not give you issues later in future. I would advise rent out the whole property and get nice flat for your mom

You spoke my mind
OP rent elsewhere for your mom and renew her rent from your tenants' rentals, as it stands your 21YO brother will deal with you not your mom and there's nothing you can do because momma will bug you down with lots of pleadings on his behalf.
1. He will disturb and make trouble with your tenants
2. He might rent without notice
3. He could fraudulently sell it
etc.
Use it for business for now.

Stephen0mozzy:
It's simple; let her know that you want her to stay in the house. She's your mother, she won't hate you because you clarified that you want her to stay in the house - atleast using my own mother o she no go even assume say na dash.

Dem no dey form for mothers, say it how it is and take care of her as your power reach; but clarify the impression that it's a gift to her which can cause family 'putting eyes on it' as family house.

U sabi ♥️

You are overthinking and overreacting to issues. How will your mom claim a house that she doesn't have the documents to? As long as your siblings are aware that you didn't give her the house, there is no issue there. Apart from that, it is always a normal thing for parents\family members to call their children\siblings' properties their own, that doesn't mean it is really their own. I am beginning to wonder the kind of mentality you have, if you know you won't allow your mom to live freely in that house, better not allow her go there oo, to even imagine all these things and you are arguing about them is nauseating . People like you will even give permission to their wife to maltreat their mom and siblings because of properties

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