If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? - Romance (2)

If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? - Romance (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum › Nairaland General › Romance › If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? (11261 Views)

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Fujiyama: 6:39pm On Feb 16

anytexy:
I think it is the other way round. How can a reasonable man do DNA for his kids. Any child born by a legally married wife/woman belongs to the husband. The man is looking for trouble and emotional trauma.

^^^

1 Like

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Nobody: 6:41pm On Feb 16

Sterope:
B always come before A in you people's book.

If you trust your wife, why would you want to conduct a DNA test!

.

You've not seen where trust was betrayed before?

1 Like

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by chris51(f): 6:44pm On Feb 16

anytexy:
I think it is the other way round. How can a reasonable man do DNA for his kids. Any child born by a legally married wife/woman belongs to the husband. The man is looking for trouble and emotional trauma.

I believe DNA test should be mandatory. These days women have multiple sex partners and hang paternity on the richest man

2 Likes

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by chris51(f): 6:44pm On Feb 16

chris51:
I believe DNA test should be mandatory. These days women have multiple sex partners and hang paternity on the richest man

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Jagabanfromcali: 6:46pm On Feb 16

anytexy:
I think it is the other way round. How can a reasonable man do DNA for his kids. Any child born by a legally married wife/woman belongs to the husband. The man is looking for trouble and emotional trauma.

May God save us men from people like you either as a friend or spouse

1 Like

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Azazyel: 6:50pm On Feb 16

If she starts misbehaving once you mention DNA test, just know she has cheated on you

1 Like

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Azazyel: 6:53pm On Feb 16

anytexy:
I think it is the other way round. How can a reasonable man do DNA for his kids. Any child born by a legally married wife/woman belongs to the husband. The man is looking for trouble and emotional trauma.

Go and take your meds. It's almost time

1 Like

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by gabbytabby: 6:57pm On Feb 16

It’s a clarity and not a trust issue. We all know as humans we are all subject to making mistakes so it need not be an issue.

It might create offense.

all

budaatum:
I guess the reason for the paternity test is because we don't trust each other and have no plans to be in a relationship with one another. So yes, you must do a paternity test to ensure you are not paying support for a child that is not yours.

If we are in a relationship however, and you insist on a paternity test, you must forgive me for hearing you don't trust me, and a lack of trust between us is definitely detrimental to our child, as your lack of trust will gradually eat at our relationship until there will be no relationship between us.

But I think it's not easy for a man to understand, so think of it this way. Imagine you go out one day and come back with lipstick on your cheek. I'd likely be suspicious you are playing away, and I'd be wary you don't pass on to me what you might have caught with the lipstick. So it's condoms from now on dude, which I'm certain would negatively impact our marriage and the upbringing of our children.

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by sirpharrell(m): 6:58pm On Feb 16

I advise every man who can afford it to do a DNA test on their children. You can do it discreetly without her knowledge. I did a DNA test on my supposed only son last year and received a rude shock.

2 Likes

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Ladoja19: 7:00pm On Feb 16

No further explanation for now, the day you got married to retired Olosho
You shall understand better

anytexy:
I think it is the other way round. How can a reasonable man do DNA for his kids. Any child born by a legally married wife/woman belongs to the husband. The man is looking for trouble and emotional trauma.

1 Like

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by seunsmith1930(m): 7:01pm On Feb 16

I always ask myself this same question

Wuman with tricks

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Emotionss: 7:03pm On Feb 16

[color=#006600][/color]

budaatum:
I guess the reason for the paternity test is because we don't trust each other and have no plans to be in a relationship with one another. So yes, you must do a paternity test to ensure you are not paying support for a child that is not yours.

If we are in a relationship however, and you insist on a paternity test, you must forgive me for hearing you don't trust me, and a lack of trust between us is definitely detrimental to our child, as your lack of trust will gradually eat at our relationship until there will be no relationship between us.

But I think it's not easy for a man to understand, so think of it this way. Imagine you go out one day and come back with lipstick on your cheek. I'd likely be suspicious you are playing away, and I'd be wary you don't pass on to me what you might have caught with the lipstick. So it's condoms from now on dude, which I'm certain would negatively impact our marriage and the upbringing of our children.

What in God's name are you saying ?

1 Like

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Capernum: 7:04pm On Feb 16

SUBSIDIZED AND MANDATORY DNA IS ABOUT THE ONLY WAY TO INCREASE THE PERCENTAGE OF MARITAL FIDELITY IN THE WORLD. Imagine how the rate of marital crime will fall.

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by budaatum: 7:10pm On Feb 16

Emotionss:
What in God's name are you saying ?

I'm saying nothing at all in God's name. But I trust you'd decipher what I said if you use your God given senses to decipher it.

Do however let me know which bits you find difficult exactly and I might oblige you with understanding.

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Nteogwuija(m): 7:20pm On Feb 16

Sterope:
B always come before A in you people's book.

If you trust your wife, why would you want to conduct a DNA test!

You walk into a Fouani store because you trust that they sell genuine LG projects. You ask them to put on the OLED TV so you can verify, incase there's any factory fault.

Fouani does not gaslight, unlike some women that'd say "because you love them, you must overlook their wayward acts.

Fouani knows that u trust them and they still provide assurance by giving you some years guarantee.

Life no suppose hard.

2 Likes

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Sterope(f): 7:21pm On Feb 16

You are funny. Strange traits? What's new about strange traits or looking different?

I know one particularly that is part of a twin and she is a proper bastvrd. Explain that to me please. I don't think you have appreciated the diversity of the human racem

GanagiBitrus:
What if you trust you wife, but you notice that one of your kids has strange traits & even strange physical looks?

Cases abound of people's trusts being betrayed.

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Sterope(f): 7:22pm On Feb 16

Betrayal is part of human experience.

The question didn't start with an assumption or evidence of betrayal like infidelity, then request for DNA.

FaAbData:
.

You've not seen where trust was betrayed before?

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Sterope(f): 7:25pm On Feb 16

Does this analogy sound right to you in the context of relationships? ANY relationships?

It is important to be mindful and alert in relationships but you don't jump the gun in the name of being careful especially over something this significant that can make or mar the relationship..

Nteogwuija:
You walk into a Fouani store because you trust that they sell genuine LG projects. You ask them to put on the OLED TV so you can verify, incase there's any factory fault.

Fouani does not gaslight, unlike some women.

They know u trust them and the still give u assurance by giving you some years guarantee.

Life no suppose hard.

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by advanceDNA: 7:42pm On Feb 16

drimzsmoke:
This is not true.... There are cases of women going to the markets(even parties) and leaving their neonates with the dads or neighbors

Lol… U are sounding like im trying to lie to cover up something…..
if u have seen mothers who leave their newborns with neighbours thats fine…. Me ive not seen

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by advanceDNA: 7:50pm On Feb 16

anytexy:
I think it is the other way round. How can a reasonable man do DNA for his kids. Any child born by a legally married wife/woman belongs to the husband. The man is looking for trouble and emotional trauma.

What has being born by legally married woman has to do with basic biology of sperm and ovum??
the man is not the one looking for trouble……. trouble already started when a legally married woman started spreading legs for another man and decided to pin the baby on her husband

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by GorillaApp(m): 7:50pm On Feb 16

Gbadugbakun:
Do you even need to tell her. DNA can be done with a strand of hair from the child or saliva or anything belonging to the child. Just take whatever you need from the child and do it secretly without her knowledge. If the child is yours you would lock up. If the child isn't yours you can confront her with the results. Telling your wife you want a DNA test is childish and dramatic, because 99% of women would play the victim card with that request.

10 cartons of gulder lager to your location! I don't understand all this hype about trust issue or what have you. Maybe men needs to be educated more that you can do it discreetly without anybody knowing. Get your biological sample and that of the child and run the test. Period!

1 Like

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by callmetade: 7:51pm On Feb 16

Sterope:
B always come before A in you people's book.

If you trust your wife, why would you want to conduct a DNA test!

wife wey I meet when exactly? Abeg remove that trust thing, this is 2026 DNA test is a must. It's just DNA test , we should both be ready to go and see doctor together... No be big deal nah.

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Hellisreal70: 7:52pm On Feb 16

Even God hate infidelity, adultery and anything extramarital sex not to talk of bringing bastard to your husband.
I think ladies and women should go and read numbers 5 : 11- 31. So that they can know that men have every right to request DNA test if there is any suspicion.

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by GorillaApp(m): 8:02pm On Feb 16

anytexy:
I think it is the other way round. How can a reasonable man do DNA for his kids. Any child born by a legally married wife/woman belongs to the husband. The man is looking for trouble and emotional trauma.

I don't even know who gives people like these phones. So after a woman finishes whoring outside, she can bring the product home to me? If you are a woman, I will understand but if you are a man, then the angels in heaven made a mistake.

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Onegai(f): 8:04pm On Feb 16*

Because of these real-life examples:

3A man in my Mum's church decided his "side peace of mind" needed to be promoted to Main Woman. His pregnant wife became Enemy No1 and one day, in an insane rage, picked up the newborn and flung the baby across the room cry

. Wife ran away with the child after that. A few years later, her SiL invited her to UK and ran the DNA test: 100% very much his son. Unfortunately that throwing had the boy experience some medical issues (he still needs help till now). Man is now sending money but refusing to see the child, because Shame and Guilt are overwhelming emotions.

In every one of those cases I know of, DNA test was weaponised by a Man trying to get rid of his Wife and Family. There was never any basis for the mistrust.

Which is what will happen for most men: I recall a poster here last year that kept creating topics asking people to look at his baby daughter to see if she was really his, because the girl was fair and he was dark. No other reason. Even if na joke, the devil is waiting by the corner to take advantage.

In the few cases that there was Paternity fraud, the men quietly checked their suspicions rather than go destroy their families first. Nedu wasn't fighting his wife, it was information from the past or medicals that made him get DNA test and find paternity fraud.

When you find yourself reasoning your mind into getting a DNA test, check well: it's because seeds of discord have been planted in your heart against your wife.

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by contentEngineer: 8:05pm On Feb 16

budaatum:
I guess the reason for the paternity test is because we don't trust each other and have no plans to be in a relationship with one another. So yes, you must do a paternity test to ensure you are not paying support for a child that is not yours.

If we are in a relationship however, and you insist on a paternity test, you must forgive me for hearing you don't trust me, and a lack of trust between us is definitely detrimental to our child, as your lack of trust will gradually eat at our relationship until there will be no relationship between us.

But I think it's not easy for a man to understand, so think of it this way. Imagine you go out one day and come back with lipstick on your cheek. I'd likely be suspicious you are playing away, and I'd be wary you don't pass on to me what you might have caught with the lipstick. So it's condoms from now on dude, which I'm certain would negatively impact our marriage and the upbringing of our children.

You're talking Nonsense

1 Like 1 Share

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by DEROXMAN: 8:22pm On Feb 16

Sterope:
B always come before A in you people's book.

If you trust your wife, why would you want to conduct a DNA test!

As a female you shouldn't reason straight so I don't blame you

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Burgerlomo: 8:42pm On Feb 16

Dpsychologist:
This Thread ie about Child Support, DNA Tests, and the Truth Nobody Wants to Say

A woman files for child support.
The man responds with a simple request: a paternity test.
Suddenly, she wants to settle “amicably” because the test might affect the child psychologically.

Pause.

Let’s remove emotion and look at this clearly.

If a man is being asked to take legal and financial responsibility for a child, he has every right to confirm paternity. That is not hatred. That is not wickedness. That is due diligence.

We DNA test products.
We verify contracts.
We audit finances.

But when it comes to fatherhood, some people expect blind trust.

That makes no sense.

Now, the argument that a paternity test will “damage the child psychologically” sounds noble on the surface. But let’s ask a harder question.

What damages a child more?
A discreet DNA test handled privately by adults?
Or years of tension, suspicion, and possible resentment if the man is unsure?

Truth does not damage children. Adult drama does.

If the man is truly the father, the test protects him and silences doubt permanently. If he is not, then the truth protects him from a lifetime of responsibility for a child that is not biologically his.

Both outcomes serve clarity.

This is not about attacking women. It is about fairness.

Men have lost jobs, homes, and freedom over child support obligations. In many countries, once paternity is legally assigned, reversing it is nearly impossible, even if later evidence proves otherwise.

So why should a request for proof be treated like betrayal?

If a woman is 100 percent certain of paternity, a test should not be threatening. It should be a formality.

Wanting to “settle amicably” only after a DNA request raises questions. Because if there is nothing to hide, what is the fear?

The deeper issue here is trust.

In an ideal world, partners would never doubt each other. But we do not live in an ideal world. We live in a world where mistakes happen, secrets happen, and systems require evidence.

Fatherhood is not a small matter. It is emotional, legal, financial, and lifelong.

A DNA test is not an insult. It is protection.

And if we truly care about children, then clarity from the start is better than confusion later.

Truth might feel uncomfortable for adults.
But it is always cleaner than uncertainty.

Clear conscience fears no accusations. 👌👍👍

1 Like

Re: If You’re Sure He’s The Father, Why Fear The Test? by Sterope(f): 8:45pm On Feb 16

I am just like your mum. tongue

BTW, do you know you get your intelligence from the X chromosome that is the female chromosomes.

I know you don't which is further proof of your lvak of intelligence. You know who to blame for that, don't you? tongue

DEROXMAN:
As a female you shouldn't reason straight so I don't blame you

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