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My brother-in-law is a pastor with his own ministry. He’s been married to my younger sister for 14 years, but he’s a pathological liar who fabricates and exaggerates things effortlessly.

For example, if you eat at his house once or twice, he’ll claim he’s the reason you’re alive that without him, hunger would have killed you.

I stayed with them for 4 months in 2014 after youth service, learning a skill that should have taken 2 years. I left early because of his behavior and rented my own place by December 2014.

He now tells people he “rescued me from the village” when my father abandoned me, but I was 27 at the time, not a child that can be abandoned.

He claims the food I ate in his house for 4months (Aug–Dec 2014) was worth over ₦2 million. In reality, I ate once a day (dinner) because I left home at 7am and returned at 6pm except on Sundays, when I ate twice.

He says he no longer wants to be married to my sister, and my family has accepted his decision, but he’s slandering her: claiming she has sex video chats with men for money, has a boyfriend, and that she has even poisoned him once, causing him to pass out and come back to life, none of these allegations he can prove

My sister has been staying with me for over 3 months, but he's telling his church members that my sister is currently staying with another man.

Recently, he called my father asking for a meeting to reconcile, but I told my father the marriage must end. He keeps pleading for reconciliation.

I don’t know what he really wants from my sister.

You get pastor as an in-law, you come dey complain of lies


Person wey dey tell expensive lies to e congregation just to put food on his table?

Well,if you're surprised,I'm not,.

I stayed with them for 4 months in 2014 after youth service, learning a skill that should have taken 2 years. I left early because of his behavior and rented my own place by December 2014.

He now tells people he “rescued me from the village” when my father abandoned me, but I was 27 at the time, not a child that can be abandoned.

You went to stay with the husband to your younger sister for 4months? 😳
Shame is catching me on your behalf.
You totally lost the respect from the bro in-law doing that

Sonnobax15:

You get pastor as an in-law, you come dey complain of lies


Person wey dey tell expensive lies to e congregation just to put food on his table?

Well,if you're surprised,I'm not,.

Hehe... You nor dey lai lai disappoint. 🤣🤣

Amotolongbo:
You went to stay with the husband to your younger sister for 4months? 😳

Hehe.... It's weird ba. But person dey pray make e nor see situation wey go make am humble and eat the humble pie.

Personally, I wouldn't sha... I have all sisters (4) and one thing I've promised myself... Never give them (in-laws) an opportunity to see me finish.... No matter how things bad.... Staying with them, even over a weekend amaweh 4 months is an entry into that see finish.

Naya261:
➜My brother-in-law is a pastor with his own ministry. He’s been married to my younger sister for 14 years, but he’s a pathological liar who fabricates and exaggerates things effortlessly.
For example, if you eat at his house once or twice, he’ll claim he’s the reason you’re alive that without him, hunger would have killed you.
I stayed with them for 4 months in 2014 after youth service, learning a skill that should have taken 2 years. I left early because of his behavior and rented my own place by December 2014.
He now tells people he “rescued me from the village” when my father abandoned me, but I was 27 at the time, not a child that can be abandoned.
➜ He claims the food I ate in his house for 4months (Aug–Dec 2014) was worth over ₦2 million. In reality, I ate once a day (dinner) because I left home at 7am and returned at 6pm except on Sundays, when I ate twice.
He says he no longer wants to be married to my sister, and my family has accepted his decision, but he’s slandering her: claiming she has sex video chats with men for money, has a boyfriend, and that she has even poisoned him once, causing him to pass out and come back to life, none of these allegations he can prove
➜ My sister has been staying with me for over 3 months, but he's telling his church members that my sister is currently staying with another man. Recently, he called my father asking for a meeting to reconcile, but I told my father the marriage must end. He keeps pleading for reconciliation. I don’t know what he really wants from my sister.

1. When people show you who they are the first time, believe them and do all you can to avoid them once you realize they are toxic. 😒

2. Again, believe it and insist that your sister move her life and be away from such toxic monsters. 😒

3. Hope your father and mother are aware of how toxic a being he really is. You all should want nothing to do with such toxic beings if you wish to enjoy your life and family in this life. 😒

In this life, one of the quickest ways to solve about 50% of potential issues is by removing yourself from all of the toxic beings around you. 😒

Amotolongbo:
You went to stay with the husband to your younger sister for 4months? 😳
Shame is catching me on your behalf.
You totally lost the respect from the bro in-law doing that

bro i understand and regretted that decision. The skill i wanted to learn as at then isn't available in my village so i had to move to a bit more developed area.

Do not feed the trolls. OP, I repeat, do not feed the trolls.

Pastor wey dey use him family as topic of discussion for his congregation...

Let your sister run far away from this man if they have no kids between them. Your father and the whole family should also block him. This is a mad man. You should also try to get a house in a new location. When hes tired of gossiping and telling lies he will move on with his life.

Such a person will make life miserable for your sister. He obviously has a very bad orientation and is a bad and dangerous person. Those who lie like that and tell such stories are dangerous.

Naya261:
My brother-in-law is a pastor with his own ministry. He’s been married to my younger sister for 14 years, but he’s a pathological liar who fabricates and exaggerates things effortlessly.

For example, if you eat at his house once or twice, he’ll claim he’s the reason you’re alive that without him, hunger would have killed you.

I stayed with them for 4 months in 2014 after youth service, learning a skill that should have taken 2 years. I left early because of his behavior and rented my own place by December 2014.

He now tells people he “rescued me from the village” when my father abandoned me, but I was 27 at the time, not a child that can be abandoned.

He claims the food I ate in his house for 4months (Aug–Dec 2014) was worth over ₦2 million. In reality, I ate once a day (dinner) because I left home at 7am and returned at 6pm except on Sundays, when I ate twice.

He says he no longer wants to be married to my sister, and my family has accepted his decision, but he’s slandering her: claiming she has sex video chats with men for money, has a boyfriend, and that she has even poisoned him once, causing him to pass out and come back to life, none of these allegations he can prove

My sister has been staying with me for over 3 months, but he's telling his church members that my sister is currently staying with another man.

Recently, he called my father asking for a meeting to reconcile, but I told my father the marriage must end. He keeps pleading for reconciliation.

I don’t know what he really wants from my sister.

It's simple, if your sister still want to be married to him it's her choice, respect it. If not she should move on and forget his slandering attitude. That guy is a child in a man's body. He is not ready for marriage.

Ganjafama:
It's simple, if your sister still want to be married to him it's her choice, respect it. If not she should move on and forget his slandering attitude. That guy is a child in a man's body. He is not ready for marriage.

To think he's a Man of God

A further proof that herbalists make better husband than Pastors and Imams.

Zonefree:
To think he's a Man of God

A further proof that herbalists make better husband than Pastors and Imams.

Your own na just to come dey drop useless quotes once in a while...


Na only you know wetin dey do you!

Zonefree:
To think he's a Man of God

A further proof that herbalists make better husband than Pastors and Imams.

You get problem o...

brain54:
Your own na just to come dey drop useless quotes once in a while...


Na only you know wetin dey do you!

I rebuke you.

Zonefree:
I rebuke you.

Rebuke your problemss oga...

I'm not your problem!

2mch:
Let your sister run far away from this man if they have no kids between them. Your father and the whole family should also block him. This is a mad man. You should also try to get a house in a new location. When hes tired of gossiping and telling lies he will move on with his life.

Such a person will make life miserable for your sister. He obviously has a very bad orientation and is a bad and dangerous person. Those who lie like that and tell such stories are dangerous.

Do you hear from pastor side before you call him madman? The way you people react with emotion ehn, no wonder, lot of crises globally.

Maybe, Op is the one that lying pathologically you don't know, you quickly given all sort of names because of one sided accusation.

Who, they will give chance to talk that won't side himself? Learn how to calm and neutral going forward, it would help you to take good decisions, most importantly if you opportune to get to leadership positions.

Fiscus105:
Do you hear from pastor side before you call him madman? The way you people react with emotion ehn, no wonder lot of crises globally.

Maybe, Op is the that lie pathologically you don't, you quickly given all sort names because of one sided accusation.

Who they will give chance to talk that won't side himself? Learn how to calm and neutral going forward, it would help you take good decisions and if you opportune to get to leadership positions.

Like i said, the pastor is a mad man. Is the sister not with the OP or not? If he was a good person, a pastor for that matter, the woman will still be in his house. If his wife was a bad person and the family was bad, he will not come back begging. If you want to consider the Pastor side, he needs to come and tell it but hes not here is he? You also need to mature and realize that man mad men and women are in marriage. Especially Pastors who are known a table their marriage matters in church.

Upon all these lies, him saying he no longer wants the marriage (something she should be saying ooo) and slandering her name with false accusations, does your sister herself want to continue the marriage? You've examples of his ways going back to 2014, so this is clearly how he is and he will not change. If she knows what's good for her, she'll desist from returning to him because he sounds dangerous. You and your family need to sit down and seriously talk sense into her.

Naya261:
My brother-in-law is a pastor with his own ministry. He’s been married to my younger sister for 14 years, but he’s a pathological liar who fabricates and exaggerates things effortlessly.

For example, if you eat at his house once or twice, he’ll claim he’s the reason you’re alive that without him, hunger would have killed you.

I stayed with them for 4 months in 2014 after youth service, learning a skill that should have taken 2 years. I left early because of his behavior and rented my own place by December 2014.

He now tells people he “rescued me from the village” when my father abandoned me, but I was 27 at the time, not a child that can be abandoned.

He claims the food I ate in his house for 4months (Aug–Dec 2014) was worth over ₦2 million. In reality, I ate once a day (dinner) because I left home at 7am and returned at 6pm except on Sundays, when I ate twice.

He says he no longer wants to be married to my sister, and my family has accepted his decision, but he’s slandering her: claiming she has sex video chats with men for money, has a boyfriend, and that she has even poisoned him once, causing him to pass out and come back to life, none of these allegations he can prove

My sister has been staying with me for over 3 months, but he's telling his church members that my sister is currently staying with another man.

Recently, he called my father asking for a meeting to reconcile, but I told my father the marriage must end. He keeps pleading for reconciliation.

I don’t know what he really wants from my sister.

Let the reconciliation decision come from your Sister not you. If she's willing to go back, let her do so.

For you, do all you can to cut the man off your life!!! Ignore him

U guys made a mistake letting ur sister marry a pastor.

There is simply no truth in them.

Pastors in Nigeria 99% of them are thieves...manipulators and evil doers. They preach on the pulpit,and u will see tears trickle down their cheeks but at night they are hooligans and monsters...all the above are done in the name of God.

U guys are calm for such a wicked man. Pastors in Nigeria are ruining people with their fake miracles,signs and wonders.

Anytime I hear pastor I loose interest and run away as quickly as possible. They are the worst of humans.

NotOfThisWorld:
Upon all these lies, him saying he no longer wants the marriage (something she should be saying ooo) and slandering her name with false accusations, does your sister herself want to continue the marriage? You've examples of his ways going back to 2014, so this is clearly how he is and he will not change. If she knows what's good for her, she'll desist from returning to him because he sounds dangerous. You and your family need to sit down and seriously talk sense into her.

My sister said she doesn't want the marriage again but they have 3kids together. 13, 11 and 8 yrs. Its only because of the kids that she's considering going back but I told her that she can always see the kids and spend time with them.

Naya261:
My sister said she doesn't want the marriage again but they have 3kids together. 13, 11 and 8 yrs. Its only because of the kids that she's considering going back but I told her that she can always see the kids and spend time with them.

You don't go back to a bad person because of the kids but they should be a big part of your reason for leaving. Umm, she can always see the kids and spend time with them? Is she going to leave them with him? They're going to grow up to be like him. With the way he lies, he may also brainwash them into turning against her. Those kids aren't safe in his hands if she leaves them behind. If anything, they should be in her custody while he sends her child support, and he can visit them supervised. I would not trust a pathological liar (and who has already turned against their mother) with kids.

Naya261:
➜My sister said she doesn't want the marriage again but they have 3kids together. 13, 11 and 8 yrs. Its only because of the kids that she's considering going back but I told her that she can always see the kids and spend time with them.

If she is trying to use the children as excuse to get back with a toxic man such as that, then your sister is still not connected with reality. How does her going back to such a toxic man help the children in this case? How can children be happy living with a man who denigrates and humiliates their mother every chance he gets? Ask her to make that make sense to you.

Assuming the man has never abused the children in any way, there is a way for the two to remain involved in the lives of the children without the two parents living under the same roof. If she is legally married to the man, she can take him to court and file for shared custody of the children, where the children spend some days or weeks out of each month with either parent. That way, they can spend equal time out of each week or month with their father and then their mother, while ensuring both parents are involved in the lives of the children.😒

Kobojunkie:
If she is trying to use the children as excuse to get back with a toxic man such as that, then your sister is still not connected with reality. How does her going back to such a toxic man help the children in this case? How can children be happy living with a man who denigrates and humiliates their mother every chance he gets? Ask her to make that make sense to you.

Assuming the man has never abused the children in any way, there is a way for the two to remain involved in the lives of the children without the two parents living under the same roof. If she is legally married to the man, she can take him to court and file for shared custody of the children, where the children spend some days or weeks out of each month with either parent. That way, they can spend equal time out of each week or month with their father and then their mother, while ensuring both parents are involved in the lives of the children.😒

Thanks alot. As for now she's staying with me in my 3bedroom apartment. I am also married with 3kids. She's staying in one room in the apartment. She was a full-time housewife and was 100% dependant on the man, but i have enrolled her in a place that she's learning graphics design and printing because that was her job in the village before she got married but the man didn't allow her to work. I want her to upgrade her knowledge and learn new things. Considering the issue of shared custody, she doesn't have her own place yet and the man said that i am his sworn enemy for life because I allowed my sister to stay in my house instead of allowing her to go to the village and stay with my parents. He might tell the court that his children are not safe under my roof.

NotOfThisWorld:
You don't go back to a bad person because of the kids but they should be a big part of your reason for leaving. Umm, she can always see the kids and spend time with them? Is she going to leave them with him? They're going to grow up to be like him. With the way he lies, he may also brainwash them into turning against her. Those kids aren't safe in his hands if she leaves them behind. If anything, they should be in her custody while he sends her child support, and he can visit them supervised. I would not trust a pathological liar (and who has already turned against their mother) with kids.

He has already started brainwashing the kids. This man will record a voice note cursing my sister and forward it to the daughter and ask her to send it to her mother. It's not as if my sister blocked him o. He told the children that their mother abandoned them and is currently living with another man. The last daughter did a birthday last month and my sister wanted to buy a gift and send across to her this man warned her not to buy anything for his children with the dirty money she collects from men. He has told the eldest daughter to her both on WhatsApp and phone call. This man is a complete devïl.

Naya261:
✓ Thanks alot. As for now she's staying with me in my 3bedroom apartment. I am also married with 3kids. She's staying in one room in the apartment. She was a full-time housewife and was 100% dependant on the man, but i have enrolled her in a place that she's learning graphics design and printing because that was her job in the village before she got married but the man didn't allow her to work. I want her to upgrade her knowledge and learn new things.

✓ Considering the issue of shared custody, she doesn't have her own place yet and the man said that i am his sworn enemy for life because I allowed my sister to stay in my house instead of allowing her to go to the village and stay with my parents. He might tell the court that his children are not safe under my roof.

Women without financial independence are preys to the wolves masquerading as husband material out there. 🥱

2. Well, it is his word against hers in that case, right? Are the children with the man or with your sister? If they are with him, then she should still go to court to ensure that she at least pay her share of child support to him in the meantime. That way, when she is finally becomes financially independent and then files for shared custody, there would be court records to show that despite not being able to care for the kids,she was at least doing her part as there parent. 🥱

If the kids are already with her, she still should go to the courts to end the marriage, and to work on the custody issues. So long as he is not violent towards the children, he should make contributions to their card and education.

Whatever decision, getting the courts involved is a good way to go, in my opinion.

Naya261:
He has already started brainwashing the kids. This man will record a voice note cursing my sister and forward it to the daughter and ask her to send it to her mother. It's not as if my sister blocked him o. He told the children that their mother abandoned them and is currently living with another man. The last daughter did a birthday last month and my sister wanted to buy a gift and send across to her this man warned her not to buy anything for his children with the dirty money she collects from men. He has told the eldest daughter to her both on WhatsApp and phone call. This man is a complete devïl.

Where do they live? In Lagos? If your sister wants her kids and to divorce this man which is the best move, just drag all the evidence and take it to court. In fact he wont want this to get on social media or hes finished. Hes obviously mentally unstable and shoult not have custody of those kids.

But approach him with caution so he does not harm them. Maybe if they come for visit then you people strike and make sure to expose him, get government and social media activists in court. For now, ignore him till the right time. Ensure your sister is well skilled even if na Fashion design so she can support herself and kids when they are finally together.

Kobojunkie:
Women without financial independence are preys to the wolves masquerading as husband material out there. 🥱

2. Well, it is his word against hers in that case, right? Are the children with the man or with your sister? If they are with him, then she should still go to court to ensure that she at least pay her share of child support to him in the meantime. That way, when she is finally becomes financially independent and then files for shared custody, there would be court records to show that despite not being able to care for the kids,she was at least doing her part as there parent. 🥱

If the kids are already with her, she still should go to the courts to end the marriage, and to work on the custody issues. So long as he is not violent towards the children, he should make contributions to their card and education.

Whatever decision, getting the courts involved is a good way to go, in my opinion.

The children are with the man and he wants to use them as a bait to lure her back. The only reason why the man wants her back is because of house chores, cooking, school runs and taking care of the children. Could you believe that this man hasn't slept with her and stopped eating at home for 8months+. He went and rent a single room for himself claiming that its where he normally goes to pray. Out of 7days in a week he sleeps their twice or three times. My sister doesn't have a single say in that marriage.

2mch:
Where do they live? In Lagos? If your sister wants her kids and to divorce this man which is the best move, just drag all the evidence and take it to court. In fact he wont want this to get on social media or hes finished. Hes obviously mentally unstable and shoult not have custody of those kids.

But approach him with caution so he does not harm them. Maybe if they come for visit then you people strike and make sure to expose him, get government and social media activists in court. For now, ignore him till the right time. Ensure your sister is well skilled even if na Fashion design so she can support herself and kids when they are finally together.

They stay in Benin City Edo state. My sister was into graphics design, printing and branding before she got married but he stopped after marriage. I have enrolled her in a computer centre were she needs to upgrade her skills.