₦airaland Forum

Please, I need sincere advice because my mind is not at rest anymore. What started as a normal family visit has suddenly turned into something I never imagined in my life.
My wife and I went to her family house to discuss our forthcoming engagement and other marriage arrangements since she is already pregnant. The discussion took longer than expected, and before we knew it, it was already late in the evening. To make matters worse, rain started falling heavily, and getting transportation back home became very difficult.

I was outside in the rain, moving around and searching for a vehicle that could convey us and my uncle, who accompanied me, back home safely. Throughout that stressful moment, my wife didn’t even seem concerned. She stayed where she was without making any effort to assist or even show worry about the situation. Surprisingly, her mother later came out to meet me at the roadside, praying and hoping we would find a vehicle soon. Even her father’s younger brother joined me in searching for transportation.

After almost one hour, we finally got a cab. While we were inside the vehicle, my wife tried to start a conversation, but I was already upset and disappointed, so I kept quiet. After dropping my uncle close to his destination, we continued our journey home in silence.

At some point on the road, I finally spoke out in anger. I asked her why she behaved so unconcerned despite the fact that we came to her family house for something very important concerning our future together. Instead of calming things down, she became angry too and started saying hurtful words back at me.

As we were walking home, she suddenly said she wanted to ease herself by the roadside. Because I was still angry, I continued walking slowly ahead without paying much attention. After a few minutes, I looked back and realized she was no longer behind me.
I immediately returned to the exact spot where she said she wanted to ease herself, but I couldn’t find her anywhere.
Since that night, my wife has been missing for 4 days.

I have contacted her mother several times, but she told me not to report the matter to her father yet. According to her, she believes her daughter is safe and will eventually return home. But honestly, I’m becoming very suspicious and confused. Part of me feels she may know where my wife is hiding, but I can’t say for sure.

What keeps disturbing me the most is this: Where did my pregnant wife sleep that night? Who is she with? Is she safe? And why would she disappear without contacting anyone for 4 days?

Right now, I’m emotionally exhausted and scared. I truly love my wife despite our misunderstanding, and I never imagined something like this would happen over an argument.

Please, experienced married men and women on this forum, what should I do at this point? Should I involve her father and report this officially, or should I still keep waiting and hope she comes back on her own?

There must have been a communication breakdown somewhere before or during your search for vehicle. In my opinion, since it was a special one-off event, you could have made advance arrangements for transports. You probably overreacted or expected too much from a stressed pregnant woman. I think you should follow what her mother says. She'll reappear & if she's got no good explanation for her disappearance, you may have to reconsider your plans with her.

Your pregnant girlfriend, not your wife.

You are seeing the signs, its now your choice to graduate her from pregnant girlfriend to wife.

Op the location and region will determine if the disappearance is intentional.
Remember Nigeria is no longer safe.
I pray she wasn't kidnapped.
I pray you find her soon

Please where is the location?

Four days and you've not contacted the girl's father? You've not contacted the police?

What if the mother eventually accused you of using her daughter for sacrifice?

Anything is possible now. She could be with the main father of that child or she hatched a plan with the mother to disappear. Only police investigation will prove things right or wrong.

You never mentioned if you called her on phone or not.
What's her response.
If the mother has called her on phone or not.
What was the argument about at her place.

Kindly give a clear narrative of what transpired at her parents place.
Untill you do, we can't go beyond this point to assertain what happened.

4days is too much, same day or vat most the next day you should have reported at the nearest police station to be on the safer side, and if she stayed somewhere out of anger that not a good omen for the long road ahead. if things go south you the last person with her and you did be held as prime suspect, when you see her another meeting with both families need to be conducted on this issue

OP, your write-up is kind of sketchy, but be that as it may i would want you to be alert because something is kind of fishy.

There is a sinister movement your wife is making and I believe her mother could be aware based on the response she gave you not to report the matter to the girl's gather.

Like one comment up there said, that Nigeria is not safe, what if she has been kidn-app-ed and used for ri-tual.

My candid advice is, report to the father ASAP, even you can report also to the police for certainty that you are not involved in whatever must have happened to your "to be wife"

One this is missing; did you call her phone during those 4 days she has being missing?

Things dey happen o..

So you stayed mute for 4 days? You couldn't run to make a report at the police station?
How do you defend yourself if something bad has happened to her and her mother later denies knowing anything?

My instincts tell me she is in touch with her mother. Inform the father IMMEDIATELY. If she doesn't appear within 24 hours of informing the father, report to the police and inform your own family.

If you later find out that she's been in touch with her mother or father all these while, then you must reconsider going ahead with marriage plans.

For your own good I hope she's safe. Please swing into action immediately.

You are yet to officially tie the knot, but you have already started keeping malice. From malice, it will graduate to emotional abuse, proceeded by physical abuse.

Most of you rush into marriage due to bandwagon effect. Both of you are clearly not ready for marriage! If you and your girlfriend don't work on your attitude and discuss your weaknesses to find a balance, you will surely have a miserable marriage.

Ehinjuola:
Please, I need sincere advice because my mind is not at rest anymore. What started as a normal family visit has suddenly turned into something I never imagined in my life.
My wife and I went to her family house to discuss our forthcoming engagement and other marriage arrangements since she is already pregnant. The discussion took longer than expected, and before we knew it, it was already late in the evening. To make matters worse, rain started falling heavily, and getting transportation back home became very difficult.

I was outside in the rain, moving around and searching for a vehicle that could convey us and my uncle, who accompanied me, back home safely. Throughout that stressful moment, my wife didn’t even seem concerned. She stayed where she was without making any effort to assist or even show worry about the situation. Surprisingly, her mother later came out to meet me at the roadside, praying and hoping we would find a vehicle soon. Even her father’s younger brother joined me in searching for transportation.

After almost one hour, we finally got a cab. While we were inside the vehicle, my wife tried to start a conversation, but I was already upset and disappointed, so I kept quiet. After dropping my uncle close to his destination, we continued our journey home in silence.

At some point on the road, I finally spoke out in anger. I asked her why she behaved so unconcerned despite the fact that we came to her family house for something very important concerning our future together. Instead of calming things down, she became angry too and started saying hurtful words back at me.

As we were walking home, she suddenly said she wanted to ease herself by the roadside. Because I was still angry, I continued walking slowly ahead without paying much attention. After a few minutes, I looked back and realized she was no longer behind me.
I immediately returned to the exact spot where she said she wanted to ease herself, but I couldn’t find her anywhere.
Since that night, my wife has been missing for 4 days.

I have contacted her mother several times, but she told me not to report the matter to her father yet. According to her, she believes her daughter is safe and will eventually return home. But honestly, I’m becoming very suspicious and confused. Part of me feels she may know where my wife is hiding, but I can’t say for sure.

What keeps disturbing me the most is this: Where did my pregnant wife sleep that night? Who is she with? Is she safe? And why would she disappear without contacting anyone for 4 days?

Right now, I’m emotionally exhausted and scared. I truly love my wife despite our misunderstanding, and I never imagined something like this would happen over an argument.

Please, experienced married men and women on this forum, what should I do at this point? Should I involve her father and report this officially, or should I still keep waiting and hope she comes back on her own?

Did you call her line? Was there a response? Did you search the area where you saw her last? Report the issue to her father and the police. Something tells me she's with another man and her family is aware. Whatever you do just know that she's hiding something from you.

Ehinjuola:
Please, I need sincere advice because my mind is not at rest anymore. What started as a normal family visit has suddenly turned into something I never imagined in my life.
My wife and I went to her family house to discuss our forthcoming engagement and other marriage arrangements since she is already pregnant. The discussion took longer than expected, and before we knew it, it was already late in the evening. To make matters worse, rain started falling heavily, and getting transportation back home became very difficult.

I was outside in the rain, moving around and searching for a vehicle that could convey us and my uncle, who accompanied me, back home safely. Throughout that stressful moment, my wife didn’t even seem concerned. She stayed where she was without making any effort to assist or even show worry about the situation. Surprisingly, her mother later came out to meet me at the roadside, praying and hoping we would find a vehicle soon. Even her father’s younger brother joined me in searching for transportation.

After almost one hour, we finally got a cab. While we were inside the vehicle, my wife tried to start a conversation, but I was already upset and disappointed, so I kept quiet. After dropping my uncle close to his destination, we continued our journey home in silence.

At some point on the road, I finally spoke out in anger. I asked her why she behaved so unconcerned despite the fact that we came to her family house for something very important concerning our future together. Instead of calming things down, she became angry too and started saying hurtful words back at me.

As we were walking home, she suddenly said she wanted to ease herself by the roadside. Because I was still angry, I continued walking slowly ahead without paying much attention. After a few minutes, I looked back and realized she was no longer behind me.
I immediately returned to the exact spot where she said she wanted to ease herself, but I couldn’t find her anywhere.
Since that night, my wife has been missing for 4 days.

I have contacted her mother several times, but she told me not to report the matter to her father yet. According to her, she believes her daughter is safe and will eventually return home. But honestly, I’m becoming very suspicious and confused. Part of me feels she may know where my wife is hiding, but I can’t say for sure.

What keeps disturbing me the most is this: Where did my pregnant wife sleep that night? Who is she with? Is she safe? And why would she disappear without contacting anyone for 4 days?

Right now, I’m emotionally exhausted and scared. I truly love my wife despite our misunderstanding, and I never imagined something like this would happen over an argument.

Please, experienced married men and women on this forum, what should I do at this point? Should I involve her father and report this officially, or should I still keep waiting and hope she comes back on her own?

UPDATE: My Mother-in-Law Finally Called Me

My mother-in-law just called and confirmed that my wife is currently with her.

According to her, when my wife got there, she claimed that I deliberately abandoned her on the road that night. She also said she fell along the way and that she even got home before I did. Honestly, I find that story hard to believe because immediately I noticed she was no longer behind me, I traced my steps back to the exact place where she said she wanted to urinate, but she was nowhere to be found.

From what I was told, she stayed there for several hours before eventually going to her friend’s place to sleep for the night.

My mother-in-law also said my wife told her that if not for her mother and my uncle who accompanied us that day, she wouldn’t have returned home at all.

For those asking why I didn’t try calling her repeatedly that night, her phone was faulty and had already been submitted to a repairer before this incident happened, so reaching her directly was impossible.

To be honest, my instinct has been telling me since the following morning that she was probably already with her mother. That is why her mother kept insisting that I shouldn’t report the issue to her father. Looking back now, it all makes sense.

At this point, I honestly feel like they are both playing with my emotions and mental state.

What pains me most is that throughout all of this, she never seemed concerned about how worried, confused, and emotionally disturbed I would be after realizing my pregnant wife disappeared in the middle of the night without any explanation for four days.

Bros please don't pay bradly price run ohh your babe will still be urs nothing go do they baby biko stay clear

Ehinjuola:
UPDATE: My Mother-in-Law Finally Called Me

My mother-in-law just called and confirmed that my wife is currently with her.

According to her, when my wife got there, she claimed that I deliberately abandoned her on the road that night. She also said she fell along the way and that she even got home before I did. Honestly, I find that story hard to believe because immediately I noticed she was no longer behind me, I traced my steps back to the exact place where she said she wanted to urinate, but she was nowhere to be found.

From what I was told, she stayed there for several hours before eventually going to her friend’s place to sleep for the night.

My mother-in-law also said my wife told her that if not for her mother and my uncle who accompanied us that day, she wouldn’t have returned home at all.

For those asking why I didn’t try calling her repeatedly that night, her phone was faulty and had already been submitted to a repairer before this incident happened, so reaching her directly was impossible.

To be honest, my instinct has been telling me since the following morning that she was probably already with her mother. That is why her mother kept insisting that I shouldn’t report the issue to her father. Looking back now, it all makes sense.

At this point, I honestly feel like they are both playing with my emotions and mental state.

What pains me most is that throughout all of this, she never seemed concerned about how worried, confused, and emotionally disturbed I would be after realizing my pregnant wife disappeared in the middle of the night without any explanation for four days.

Ehinjuola

Both of you aren't handling this well.

First, you need to lead her better. Yes, you had a right to be angry she didn't care you were under the rain.

But you had no right to walk away leaving her. You're telling us your side of the story and that means you "merely" left her a few minutes. But unless she's a pregnant Tobi Amusan, no pregnant lady is moving that fast (jump quick waka or fly bike). So you ignored her for a while most likely. Own it, na man you be (we no go beat u, na only chastise we go chastise u).

You got mad and left your family in danger. That can never happen again.

(Notice I called her "your family" because that's what she is: your wife and your child, 2 in 1).

Now, that's why her mum hid her for 4 days.

And that was wrong, she should have maturely told you "don't you leave my daughter and grandchild alone and unsafe again". Speak up like a Mother, not like a stranger.

2 wrongs don't make a right.

Talk to your wife, tell her pregnancy, wedding plan and the devil can upset both of you, but you're a Warrior and warriors don't leave their families unsafe. And a warrior's wife trusts her leader to keep her safe. So this shouldn't happen again

End the conversation by praying over her and your child.

I am more concerned at why you are continuously calling her your wife. If you like the idea of having a wife so much, then do the right thing.

That said, wedding planning puts a lot of pressure on couples. Sometimes it would look like you don't want to marry again. Except this a pattern that has been there (i.e) not being concerned about you, I see no cause for worry.

I no trust that her mama sha. I wish you strength with your MIL, because you go need am.

Ok just seen your update, you need to tread with caution and maturity, marriage is not child’s play, if your ‘mum in law’ is hiding her daughter when you’re not yet married, I wonder the show that will take place when you start having big fights and arguments because trust me you will !

escortafrik:
Ok just seen your update, you need to tread with caution and maturity, marriage is not child’s play, if your ‘mum in law’ is hiding her daughter when you’re not yet married, I wonder the show that will take place when you start having big fights and arguments because trust me you will !

Bros let's be realistic here, you let your woman and your unborn child down, you seem to have anger issues and that's where the problem lies. Work on your anger.

Damn, you left your pregnant wife in a bush in the middle of the road at night! She disappeared for 4 days and you didn’t think to call her father or the police. This is so wild that I need a nap before I advice you 🤦‍♀️

SMH

You went to visit her people for the first time, right?

And in the process, rain got all of you stranded for some hours, right?

And you and your bro were trying to get a cab in the rain, right?

What if I tell you that she was mad at you because you haven't got a car.

There might be some other reasons, but what I stated here is the major reason for her attitude.

Your girlfriend (I don't want to call her wife) is not the type that can endure hardships with a man.

Your wife is pregnant stop shouting or getting angry with her ... Whatever she says or does just ignore it and continue pampering her so she can go through the trimesters and deliver safely. She is carrying your replica, some people are still searching for their replica.

Since her mom told you to relax, just relax, she definitely knows her whereabout, no mother will recieve news of her child missing and relax, if you act worried now, you already given her weapons to be using against you subsequently, when she return, simply tell her welcome back, next time she won't won't disappear again

First she is not your wife, you never pay bride price so she is just a pregnant girlfriend.

Secondly, stop acting childish because you are the cause of the whole thing.
You need more education or knowledge about pregnant people.
I always tell my newly married friend, the most difficult time with a woman is during pregnancy, this species will frustrate your life but in your case she did nothing wrong
You cannot expect your pregnant girlfriend to stay with you in outside looking for cab na you cause am and for fact that she left that night means you are a complainer and always feeling like you are doing her a favor.

Good luck

Ehinjuola:
Please, I need sincere advice because my mind is not at rest anymore. What started as a normal family visit has suddenly turned into something I never imagined in my life.
My wife and I went to her family house to discuss our forthcoming engagement and other marriage arrangements since she is already pregnant. The discussion took longer than expected, and before we knew it, it was already late in the evening. To make matters worse, rain started falling heavily, and getting transportation back home became very difficult.

I was outside in the rain, moving around and searching for a vehicle that could convey us and my uncle, who accompanied me, back home safely. Throughout that stressful moment, my wife didn’t even seem concerned. She stayed where she was without making any effort to assist or even show worry about the situation. Surprisingly, her mother later came out to meet me at the roadside, praying and hoping we would find a vehicle soon. Even her father’s younger brother joined me in searching for transportation.

After almost one hour, we finally got a cab. While we were inside the vehicle, my wife tried to start a conversation, but I was already upset and disappointed, so I kept quiet. After dropping my uncle close to his destination, we continued our journey home in silence.

At some point on the road, I finally spoke out in anger. I asked her why she behaved so unconcerned despite the fact that we came to her family house for something very important concerning our future together. Instead of calming things down, she became angry too and started saying hurtful words back at me.

As we were walking home, she suddenly said she wanted to ease herself by the roadside. Because I was still angry, I continued walking slowly ahead without paying much attention. After a few minutes, I looked back and realized she was no longer behind me.
I immediately returned to the exact spot where she said she wanted to ease herself, but I couldn’t find her anywhere.
Since that night, my wife has been missing for 4 days.

I have contacted her mother several times, but she told me not to report the matter to her father yet. According to her, she believes her daughter is safe and will eventually return home. But honestly, I’m becoming very suspicious and confused. Part of me feels she may know where my wife is hiding, but I can’t say for sure.

What keeps disturbing me the most is this: Where did my pregnant wife sleep that night? Who is she with? Is she safe? And why would she disappear without contacting anyone for 4 days?

Right now, I’m emotionally exhausted and scared. I truly love my wife despite our misunderstanding, and I never imagined something like this would happen over an argument.

Please, experienced married men and women on this forum, what should I do at this point? Should I involve her father and report this officially, or should I still keep waiting and hope she comes back on her own?

Your wife done go meet her CHIKE....


Try find out who be this her CHIKE, wetin give am that mind if sleeping outside....

This thing so na wetin them dey do poor man be that

Her mother knows where she is right now.If you want to blow up the lid out of the whole matter report this incident to her dad.

She don run go meet person wey give her bele

escortafrik:
Ok just seen your update, you need to tread with caution and maturity, marriage is not child’s play, if your ‘mum in law’ is hiding her daughter when you’re not yet married, I wonder the show that will take place when you start having big fights and arguments because trust me you will !

@op. Hold on to these. Red flag is flashing

pocohantas:
I am more concerned at why you are continuously calling her your wife. If you like the idea of having a wife so much, then do tje right thing.

That said, wedding planning puts a lot of pressure on couples. Sometimes it would look like you don't want to marry again. Except this a pattern that has been there (i.e) not being concerned about, I see no cause for worry.

I no trust that her mama sha. I wish you strength with your MIL, because you go need am.

This the best advice from all the other females @op.

Ehinjuola:
Please, I need sincere advice because my mind is not at rest anymore. What started as a normal family visit has suddenly turned into something I never imagined in my life.
My wife and I went to her family house to discuss our forthcoming engagement and other marriage arrangements since she is already pregnant. The discussion took longer than expected, and before we knew it, it was already late in the evening. To make matters worse, rain started falling heavily, and getting transportation back home became very difficult.

I was outside in the rain, moving around and searching for a vehicle that could convey us and my uncle, who accompanied me, back home safely. Throughout that stressful moment, my wife didn’t even seem concerned. She stayed where she was without making any effort to assist or even show worry about the situation. Surprisingly, her mother later came out to meet me at the roadside, praying and hoping we would find a vehicle soon. Even her father’s younger brother joined me in searching for transportation.

After almost one hour, we finally got a cab. While we were inside the vehicle, my wife tried to start a conversation, but I was already upset and disappointed, so I kept quiet. After dropping my uncle close to his destination, we continued our journey home in silence.

At some point on the road, I finally spoke out in anger. I asked her why she behaved so unconcerned despite the fact that we came to her family house for something very important concerning our future together. Instead of calming things down, she became angry too and started saying hurtful words back at me.

As we were walking home, she suddenly said she wanted to ease herself by the roadside. Because I was still angry, I continued walking slowly ahead without paying much attention. After a few minutes, I looked back and realized she was no longer behind me.
I immediately returned to the exact spot where she said she wanted to ease herself, but I couldn’t find her anywhere.
Since that night, my wife has been missing for 4 days.

I have contacted her mother several times, but she told me not to report the matter to her father yet. According to her, she believes her daughter is safe and will eventually return home. But honestly, I’m becoming very suspicious and confused. Part of me feels she may know where my wife is hiding, but I can’t say for sure.

What keeps disturbing me the most is this: Where did my pregnant wife sleep that night? Who is she with? Is she safe? And why would she disappear without contacting anyone for 4 days?

Right now, I’m emotionally exhausted and scared. I truly love my wife despite our misunderstanding, and I never imagined something like this would happen over an argument.

Please, experienced married men and women on this forum, what should I do at this point? Should I involve her father and report this officially, or should I still keep waiting and hope she comes back on her own?

You are not being honest or are hiding something .

Your pregnant girlfriend disappeared as you were walking together and you went back home to sleep peacefully.

Even the reason for your quarrel with her is not right.

You expect your pregnant wife to follow you under the rain to search for a cab and when she didn't you got angry for what reason?

From what you've posted here I can seduce the following :

1. You had a heated argument with your fiancée

2. She suddenly disappeared from thin air as you were walking to your house after dropping from the cab.

3. You said you only went back to check were you last saw her and when you could not find her, you went home to sleep

4. It's been 4 days since she was last seen and the only person you have reported this to is her mother whom you claim warmed you not to contact the police or her father.

This your story get k leg oh

Ehinjuola:
UPDATE: My Mother-in-Law Finally Called Me

My mother-in-law just called and confirmed that my wife is currently with her.

According to her, when my wife got there, she claimed that I deliberately abandoned her on the road that night. She also said she fell along the way and that she even got home before I did. Honestly, I find that story hard to believe because immediately I noticed she was no longer behind me, I traced my steps back to the exact place where she said she wanted to urinate, but she was nowhere to be found.

From what I was told, she stayed there for several hours before eventually going to her friend’s place to sleep for the night.

My mother-in-law also said my wife told her that if not for her mother and my uncle who accompanied us that day, she wouldn’t have returned home at all.

For those asking why I didn’t try calling her repeatedly that night, her phone was faulty and had already been submitted to a repairer before this incident happened, so reaching her directly was impossible.

To be honest, my instinct has been telling me since the following morning that she was probably already with her mother. That is why her mother kept insisting that I shouldn’t report the issue to her father. Looking back now, it all makes sense.

At this point, I honestly feel like they are both playing with my emotions and mental state.

What pains me most is that throughout all of this, she never seemed concerned about how worried, confused, and emotionally disturbed I would be after realizing my pregnant wife disappeared in the middle of the night without any explanation for four days.

Brovv having followed your story up till now and if all you've narrated is true, I will categorically tell you to dodge this red flag or missile of a girlfriend (she's not your wife).

What wife to be would disappear on her love in that manner without respect or care how worried you'd be?

She doesn't love or respect you probably because you're not as financially secure as she'd want, because why don't you even have your car in the first place..?

Better seriously reconsider marrying that strange girl you refer to as wife. If a woman I wanna marry couldn't bear with my frustrations and disrespected me like that.. I'll cut her loose, let her go and find the man that's worthy of her respect and honor

Ehinjuola:
UPDATE: My Mother-in-Law Finally Called Me

My mother-in-law just called and confirmed that my wife is currently with her.

According to her, when my wife got there, she claimed that I deliberately abandoned her on the road that night. She also said she fell along the way and that she even got home before I did. Honestly, I find that story hard to believe because immediately I noticed she was no longer behind me, I traced my steps back to the exact place where she said she wanted to urinate, but she was nowhere to be found.

From what I was told, she stayed there for several hours before eventually going to her friend’s place to sleep for the night.

My mother-in-law also said my wife told her that if not for her mother and my uncle who accompanied us that day, she wouldn’t have returned home at all.

For those asking why I didn’t try calling her repeatedly that night, her phone was faulty and had already been submitted to a repairer before this incident happened, so reaching her directly was impossible.

To be honest, my instinct has been telling me since the following morning that she was probably already with her mother. That is why her mother kept insisting that I shouldn’t report the issue to her father. Looking back now, it all makes sense.

At this point, I honestly feel like they are both playing with my emotions and mental state.

What pains me most is that throughout all of this, she never seemed concerned about how worried, confused, and emotionally disturbed I would be after realizing my pregnant wife disappeared in the middle of the night without any explanation for four days.

And you must surely make it a matter about you
If this is how you say you are a man and you whine and nag with immaturity then do not upgrade the pregnant girl friend to wife yet. Work on yourself and also work on improving your status in this life