₦airaland Forum

​I was on my own when I received a message and a friend request simultaneously from a lady on Facebook. I didn't know which to do first: accept the request or reply to her message. Before I could decide, she bombarded me with further messages, desperately asking for my contact info. "This is a random lady," I told myself. I went through her friend list to see if we had any mutual friends, but there were none. At that point, I was certain she had mistaken me for someone else. I casually replied and probed further. She insisted I was exactly the person she wanted to talk to. After a brief period of quizzing, I gave her my contact.
​According to her, I was a mutual friend of a man she had been trying to reach, but the man was not responding to her messages. She desperately wanted to get across to him. She was right; I knew the man, even though we were not very close, but I had misplaced his number. I asked if the man or anyone around him was in danger. She said nothing of the sort. I kept pestering her for the truth if I was going to help her get the man's attention. She eventually opened up: the man's son, a final-year student, was the boyfriend of her younger sister, who was also a student. The younger sister was six months pregnant, and the guy was not showing any signs of taking responsibility. That was why she was desperately trying to reach his parents. As somebody with street experience, I knew she was the sister in question, she later admitted it too. That was not even an issue; I was moved by the story. I requested the guy's number so I could hear his side of it. Damn! The guy was so rude to me. He ended the call on me. I was embarrassed, but I shrugged it off—I was only trying to help a helpless lady.

​With time, I became her confidant, her big brother. She would tell me the latest developments, I advised her on options to explore, and I eventually got in touch with the boy's father. But he was not having it; he claimed he only sent his son to school, and anything outside of that was none of his business. A proper, tough Nigerian father. I advised her to use the boy's mother as a link to the father, since the dad's approach wasn't working.

​Let me not bore you further. From my deep dive into her social media profiles, I realized she was quite influential and commanded a decent followership. That gave her a perfect reason to hide this from the world. The reason I'm putting this out today, even though it's been four years now, was how she blocked me a few months before her delivery. I figured things eventually worked out for her with the guy's parents, and since I already knew too much, I needed to be cut off.

​This was the same lady I had linked up with my wife, so my wife could serve as a big sister to her and give her the emotional support she desperately needed at that vulnerable moment in her life.

​Just wondering this evening: would she have made an attempt on my life if we had met in person, just to keep me quiet?

Next time, don't let people get you entangled with what is non of your business.
It might cost you.

Imagine bringing a stranger's business into your family.

Okay. Let's say you wanted to be nice: the moment the father told you what he told you is when you should've hands off the matter.

Wise up o, make people no go use you balance transaction.

Wetin I no know no go know me.📌

I'm wondering if there's a reason to care. Your reward is from God so focus on that; and the real question should be:

"what lessons can I learn from what happened in this experience?"

I know wetin dey pain u no be the blocking, na the credit alerts.
I hope say she no promise to name the pikin after you? What a disappointment!!!!

Awon Good Samaritan, confidant, big brother Naija

Ramanto:
​I was on my own when I received a message and a friend request simultaneously from a lady on Facebook. I didn't know which to do first: accept the request or reply to her message. Before I could decide, she bombarded me with further messages, desperately asking for my contact info. "This is a random lady," I told myself. I went through her friend list to see if we had any mutual friends, but there were none. At that point, I was certain she had mistaken me for someone else. I casually replied and probed further. She insisted I was exactly the person she wanted to talk to. After a brief period of quizzing, I gave her my contact.
​According to her, I was a mutual friend of a man she had been trying to reach, but the man was not responding to her messages. She desperately wanted to get across to him. She was right; I knew the man, even though we were not very close, but I had misplaced his number. I asked if the man or anyone around him was in danger. She said nothing of the sort. I kept pestering her for the truth if I was going to help her get the man's attention. She eventually opened up: the man's son, a final-year student, was the boyfriend of her younger sister, who was also a student. The younger sister was six months pregnant, and the guy was not showing any signs of taking responsibility. That was why she was desperately trying to reach his parents. As somebody with street experience, I knew she was the sister in question, she later admitted it too. That was not even an issue; I was moved by the story. I requested the guy's number so I could hear his side of it. Damn! The guy was so rude to me. He ended the call on me. I was embarrassed, but I shrugged it off—I was only trying to help a helpless lady.

​With time, I became her confidant, her big brother. She would tell me the latest developments, I advised her on options to explore, and I eventually got in touch with the boy's father. But he was not having it; he claimed he only sent his son to school, and anything outside of that was none of his business. A proper, tough Nigerian father. I advised her to use the boy's mother as a link to the father, since the dad's approach wasn't working.

​Let me not bore you further. From my deep dive into her social media profiles, I realized she was quite influential and commanded a decent followership. That gave her a perfect reason to hide this from the world. The reason I'm putting this out today, even though it's been four years now, was how she blocked me a few months before her delivery. I figured things eventually worked out for her with the guy's parents, and since I already knew too much, I needed to be cut off.

​This was the same lady I had linked up with my wife, so my wife could serve as a big sister to her and give her the emotional support she desperately needed at that vulnerable moment in her life.

​Just wondering this evening: would she have made an attempt on my life if we had met in person, just to keep me quiet?

You want the thing wey happen for 1924 happen again ba??

She's a user. Next time you want to help someone, do it with "detachment" to avoid disappointment. Na kind people be mumu for this part of the world.

I learnt alot from this post. Thanks, this will be my guide in dealing with a similar scenario I'm currently handling.
I won't be used

I had this kind of reference years back. She came to my inbox and dropped asking if I know personally a Facebook friend that my friend got her pregnant. I answered her I know him very well. so I gave her honest personality of my friend she want to know more of, I did not make any attempt to contact my friend for whatever reason. It is none of my business to contact someone for business that didn't concern you.

Mariangeles:
Next time, don't let people get you entangled with what is non of your business.
It might cost you.

Imagine bringing a stranger's business into your family.

Okay. Let's say you wanted to be nice: the moment the father told you what he told you is when you should've hands off the matter.

Wise up o, make people no go use you balance transaction.

Wetin I no know no go know me.📌

Mariangeles:
Next time, don't let people get you entangled with what is non of your business.
It might cost you.

Imagine bringing a stranger's business into your family.

Okay. Let's say you wanted to be nice: the moment the father told you what he told you is when you should've hands off the matter.

Wise up o, make people no go use you balance transaction.

Wetin I no know no go know me.📌

She's from the same tribe as my wife, my wife also graduated from that University, so I assumed she'll be able to guide her better in her vulnerable state. She manipulated me emotionally, making me believe her parents were aged and helpless, and the cousins she would have informed, she didn't want them to know a respectable lady like her got pregnant while living in school hostel. You can imagine how emotional invested I was to have had the courage to call the guy in question.

I still can't believe she's shut me out, and even went as far are blocking me.

What do you want, you've done your part, move on ASAP

That's most ladies for you jare.
Once they find what they want, they'll leave without looking back.
She just used you, it's nothing special.
You're married, focus on your wife and family Sir