₦airaland Forum

pickabeau1:
ok...whatever works for u..

The nigerian man you married just happened to exist without any roots...

bukatyne:
He is not one

urheme:
really?

do you think op will worry if he doesn't have a diick?

the earlier we stop worrying the better for us, men are getting worst by the day, women have to think of other things that gives them joy.

Erm..

First of all.. I am a Man and I dont consider myself a Bad man.. (That dosent mean say 'Na me holy pass' o).

Secondly.. Men bad, men Bad.. Na Man dey fhuck these bad men, abi no be woman again?!

Like HighChief said.. She should find out the class her husband belongs to.. Serial, occasional or one-off cheater and make her decision based on that.

I love sex.. But i doubt a VB| a diildo or| that artificial Vargina can replace a human being.

I think she should start with a conversation and then work her way forward. This paranoid state of mind that she is currently having is worse than the actual cheating and does not serve to fix anything.. SO she might as well just walk away from the marriage now.

pickabeau1:
no wahala..

Just chill on the anti naija diatribe

we have enough of it on this forum from the NIDs

MadCow1:
My reliable Sources informed me that Suen has been made an offer he couldnt possibly refuse to isolate the Muslim section from the rest of Nairaland..


So basically, you are free to enter any part of Nairaland except the area that houses the potentia Terrorists and Mujahadeens..



The Isolation of the Muslim section of Nairaland should be a cause for National Security concerns..

urheme:
so on point,

is a breach of our fundamental right actually. made this comment before on a thread and the thread disappeared

MadCow1:
My reliable Sources informed me that Suen has been made an offer he couldnt possibly refuse to isolate the Muslim section from the rest of Nairaland..


So basically, you are free to enter any part of Nairaland except the area that houses the potentia Terrorists and Mujahadeens..



The Isolation of the Muslim section of Nairaland should be a cause for National Security concerns..

bukatyne:
I do not have anything against Nigeria; I am a proud Nigeria ( I am glad I was born a Nigerian .. Lara George)

I have issues against some Nigerian way of life

2 different things

I am sure other nationalities have their issues too however, I am only concerned with Nigeria

MadCow1:
Erm..

First of all.. I am a Man and I dont consider myself a Bad man.. (That dosent mean say 'Na me holy pass' o).

Secondly.. Men bad, men Bad.. Na Man dey fhuck these bad men, abi no be woman again?!

Like HighChief said.. She should find out the class her husband belongs to.. Serial, occasional or one-off cheater and make her decision based on that.

I love sex.. But i doubt a VB| a diildo or| that artificial Vargina can replace a human being.

I think she should start with a conversation and then work her way forward. This paranoid state of mind that she is currently having is worse than the actual cheating and does not serve to fix anything.. SO she might as well just walk away from the marriage now.

urheme:
let us say you are the one that is been cheated on and as an African man, you think you can forgive and love her like before?

pickabeau1:
we all wish for improvement but the rants against naija gets too much
what i see here are things which happen in other places

its not unique here..

The exposed ones should know better

bukatyne:
The issue is not that these things are exclusive to Nigerians...

The fact is that they are been justified is odd for a 'religious' country

There is a stark difference between 'I am a liar, I need to change' and 'There is nothing wrong in lying for me because I am a man/woman/child' etc. and others must NOT lie!

Who thinks like that?

A Nig

pickabeau1:
we all wish for improvement but the rants against naija gets too much
what i see here are things which happen in other places

its not unique here..

The exposed ones should know better

MadCow1:
Yes!

I have been in a situation like that and I did forgive her and it has never been talked about nor referenced ever again until today.. (Over 3 years ago).

pickabeau1:
no need convincing u otherwise

as i said before......



with time we will all know better that the whites we deify are no better

urheme:
in fact my sister, the Nigeria man is the only man I see that can keep a very hateful woman for a wife once he gets happiness outside, don,t sleep with him, don't cook, don,t wash his clothes, forget he exist, he will still keep you as a wife even when he has plenty of them

not all though, but is funny

bukatyne:
Bros,
I don't deify anybody

pickabeau1:
I'm not a sister...

Humans have issues..no one is perfect



OK...but its easy to demonise our own.....

naijababe:
Only David and Bill didn't act like they were studs and enjoying their God given rights to cheat!

naijababe:
You know it would be really nice if you just admit that majority of cheating naija men act like it is their God given right to do so, they hardly show any remorse and would give all sorts of reasons for cheating rather than just admit they were wrong and apologise. If a man wants to marry another wife, he should be bold enough to say and do it instead of gallivanting around with side chick(s).

urheme:
really?

do you think op will worry if he doesn't have a diick?

the earlier we stop worrying the better for us, men are getting worst by the day, women have to think of other things that gives them joy.

oyb:
if bill clinton were a nigerian

i HAD sexual relations with that woman - oya what are you gonna do about it

i'm the leader the free world - deal with it

bukatyne:
The issue is not that these things are exclusive to Nigerians...

The fact is that they are been justified is odd for a 'religious' country

There is a stark difference between 'I am a liar, I need to change' and 'There is nothing wrong in lying for me because I am a man/woman/child' etc. and others must NOT lie!

Who thinks like that?

A Nig

Your improvement may never come. They do not see it as wrong.

Now this amazes me: How can our mothers have happy marriages when our fathers were cheats?

Naija, the mind boggles

urheme:
no wonder you encouraged op to have a side boo.

Erm...

I did not encourage her to.. I suggested it to her.

All na option.




Maybe if her husband sees her bank statement with plenty hotel bills inside and transfers to one Johnbull... ;d EHN go reset to factory mode.

pickabeau1:
For someone like you who is a NID to also come out n say cheating is exclusive to naija guys also is mindboggling.
For the unexposed yes...its understandable
To your post...I know of few people who are unrepentant n find excuses up and down
Majority I meet either avoid cheating outright or make sure they don't let the wife know

naijababe:


Marriage is tough business even the most successful requires a lot of work to make it. The reality in my opinion is that cheating in a marriage is lot more common than we care to give credit for![b] The things these my eyes don see eh! Some men, especially of African descent act like it is their God given right to do so while some women act like they are saints. The reality is much somewhat in the middle, men cheat, women cheat; period! [/b]

OP, I wish you well in your introspection, I really don't know what I would do if my hubby were to cheat on me, I have never thought about what I would do because I find the the thought not only unbearable but also quite painful even if it is yet to happen. But honestly, it would be wrong to cheat just because he is cheating. You may want to have a genuine heart to heart with your hubby, I am not saying you should beg neither should it become a shouting contest. Only you know best how to connect with him. He has to admit to his wrongs and only then can you two begin to work on healing your relationship.

Best wishes................

naijababe:
You are so presumptious even when you don't need to be. I guess the above post from yesterday was written while I was sleepposting The mind really does boggle

MadCow1:
Erm...

I did not encourage her to.. I suggested it to her.

All na option.




Maybe if her husband sees her bank statement with plenty hotel bills inside and transfers to one Johnbull... ;d EHN go reset to factory mode.

pickabeau1:
no need convincing u otherwise

as i said before......



with time we will all know better that the whites we deify are no better

urheme:
are you serious

madcow1 pls be honest, will this work or it may likely work

answer sharper...ly
I may be transferring all my effects to madcow1

Lol..




Jealousy can spark different reactions..

No harm in trying.

SirShymex:
Salient points and interesting perspective.

However, women also need to start looking before they leap. Like someone already said: there are serial and passive cheaters. Most of the serial cheaters are either late bloomers or folks who never wanted to get married in the first place. But they were coalesced into, and most times, it's difficult to them to shake off the "single" mentality for a long time. And the common denominator/constant is cheating. So folks also need to stop forcing people to marry them. But regardless, people can change as long as they find peace, and get to a phase where they can have sober reflections, which happens all the time to all humans. I've seen career criminals change. Even personally, when I look back at my life from age 16-19, and look at who I'm today - based on how calm I'm most times (in the real word lol)...it's still mystery to me, and everyone around me including my parents. Life just happened. Hence Western society is about giving people second chances.

SirShymex:
Divorce might be the best option when the man starts making kids everywhere cos that's an irresponsible and sickening behaviour. However, if it hasn't gotten to that stage yet, try all other options to keep that family structure alive.

SirShymex:
Yes, I agree that men also need to start thinking about their kids. And the consciousness is fast changing and more dads are doing that now. However, you can't deny the fact that kids tend to look towards their mums more cos there's a natural connection (mother and child) between the two. Hence Mother's Day always get more publicity than the Father's Day.

SirShymex:
As for single mums: I've got nothing but all the respect in the world for them. But most of them can't raise boys the right way. Even girls need a father figure in their lives, and there's this connection between girls and their dads that mums will never be able to provide. And speaking as a black guy who wants the best for my people and my community. A community where our biggest problem is single parent households - there's absolutely no way I'll support that lifestyle. I should've had at least two baby mums if I wanted to, or make babies with just anyone in the next month or so. But I'll never do that cos I utterly hate that cycle, and I'll never be part of it. We as a people just need to start making the right decisions, and start doing the right thing.

SirShymex:
Divorce is the easy way out. Do you know what the kids are subjected to during/after the whole divorce madness? It's just sickening. Personally, I hate cowards and quitters. Once you get in too deep, you just have to ride out. Maybe my mentality is different cos I'm somewhat stubborn/tough and I grew up where you've to be tough to survive. But I don't rate quitters.

SirShymex:
Anyway, like my Tutor in College used to tell us during banter sessions, he used to say, "the biggest reason for divorce is marriage. So, if you're ever going to get divorced, don't ever get married." Regardless, whoever goes on the internet or to never-do-well-scandalous-friends to seek advice about their marriages(s), especially divorce, is definitely setting himself/herself for failure.

majekdom2:
its always a sad seeing a black man talk down his race simply because he or she mixed with some ill percentage of that race. The truth is majority abroad that talk this way don't even mingle,spend time , discuss life issues with these foreigers .90 percent relate closely with their fellow blacks wherever they are ... Been there. If nigeria men are ill , she can ask south African babes about their guys. I had friend in SA who says she can ever end up with a South African man because they don't respect women. We need to relate internationally before making assumptions.

pickabeau1:
Now its resorting to insults....ok

Go In peace..I dont have strength for back n forth

MadCow1:
Lol..




Jealousy can spark different reactions..

No harm in trying.