generally speaking, not when considering reasons of marriage, business, etc.

Should you pass judgement and insult people based what their family members are doing or have experienced?


eg if someone's family member had an illness or something like that (other examples could include sexually liberated or womanizing family member, 419 family member, etc) and in the course of gossip, you were told of such, should you then go on to abuse the person based on this info?

trying to understand folks here, help me out.

I can relate with you trying to protect yourself say from being scammed or something, but is abuse also required?

Shouldn't judge but it's hard not to.

why is it hard not to?

if its not something considered the culture or character of a family (and even if so), it seems somehow to insult somebody based on the actions/activities/deeds/misdeeds of their family member.

say for example, a nler meets the sister or female relative of a guy named acrum, who is a well known pirate (the guy that is).

why would it be ok to rain abuses, judgings and insults on the sister even if she's not privy to his lifestyle?

bear in mind the nler has not been directly affected by acrum's piracy, owns no boat or ship, but only heard the sister is the relative of a pirate. S/he is not dating the sister either, nor thinking of doing so.

is waka pass or be civil not considered an option?

@ tpiah do you want waka pass or be civil as an option but then when it comes to marriage, then what?

THESE THINGS CALLED GENES HAVE TO BE RESPECTED- because they are very strong.

In the days of old before entering into any relationship one made enquiries about the family, because our ancestors were wise enough to understand the power of genes.

In those days a man will consider before committing a crime because he knew that his whole family will suffer. Today it has all changed.
Even more glaring is when young men migrate and take up a new identity.
They become impossible without any manners and get really criminal . Nothing to loose because it is not their real identity.

If the family member supports the wrong done then he or she deserves the insults.

LordReed:
If the family member supports the wrong done then he or she deserves the insults.

say you have a family member who is a 419er or into some other unsalacious activity. Someone meets you and immediately starts insulting you based on that info which they received about your family member. The situation could also be vice versa, say your family member meets someone who heard unsavoury things about you.

Are you saying such behavior (ie insulting people randomly because of what you heard about their family) is ok?

How do you know whether or not a family member "supports the wrongdoing"? Assuming they don't, should they still be abused by gossipy fellows?

Assuming they do, is insulting them the way to process such information?

@ mutter

outside of marriage or relationship matters and contexts.

LordReed:
If the family member supports the wrong done then he or she deserves the insults.

yea

tpiah99:



say you have a family member who is a 419er or into some other unsalacious activity. Someone meets you and immediately starts insulting you based on that info which they received about your family member. The situation could also be vice versa, say your family member meets someone who heard unsavoury things about you.

Are you saying such behavior (ie insulting people randomly because of what you heard about their family) is ok?

How do you know whether or not a family member "supports the wrongdoing"? Assuming they don't, should they still be abused by gossipy fellows?

Assuming they do, is insulting them the way to process such information?

It is inevitable that a person riding in a shït wagon will smell of shït even if he is not the nightsoil man. If a person practicing 419 has family members that defend his actions then they deserve the insults they get. However the assumption is that it has been confirmed that the family member actually does support the wrong doing. In no way is it okay to insult people for a rumor or unconfirmed reports or simply because they are related to wrong doers. Insulting people is not something I really subscribe to but our society uses it as a goad and can be instrumental to showing someone that they are making a bad move.

tpiah99:
why is it hard not to?

if its not something considered the culture or character of a family (and even if so), it seems somehow to insult somebody based on the actions/activities/deeds/misdeeds of their family member.

say for example, a nler meets the sister or female relative of a guy named acrum, who is a well known pirate (the guy that is).

why would it be ok to rain abuses, judgings and insults on the sister even if she's not privy to his lifestyle?

bear in mind the nler has not been directly affected by acrum's piracy, owns no boat or ship, but only heard the sister is the relative of a pirate. S/he is not dating the sister either, nor thinking of doing so.

is waka pass or be civil not considered an option?

Its hard not to because we are inherently flawed like that. Judging makes us feel superior like we are better than acrum's sister even though we don't know her then there is the socialization process of learning to judge a people, a family based on our own moral standards to keep us safe from being corrupted by what we perceive as lower moral standards.

Nah, its so not ok to rain abuses and insults on the sister especially as you don't know anything about her and the only information you have is her brother is a pirate.

Waka pass or being civil should be the first option and a judgement call can come in when you get to know her.

LordReed:


It is inevitable that a person riding in a shït wagon will smell of shït even if he is not the nightsoil man. If a person practicing 419 has family members that defend his actions then they deserve the insults they get. However the assumption is that it has been confirmed that the family member actually does support the wrong doing. In no way is it okay to insult people for a rumor or unconfirmed reports or simply because they are related to wrong doers. Insulting people is not something I really subscribe to but our society uses it as a goad and can be instrumental to showing someone that they are making a bad move.

I guess I should assume the answers to the question are specific to cultural contexts, more than individual ones.


Family members of a 419 person should first be confirmed to support such nefarious activities before being attacked for those imo, however, its possible guilt is assigned based on familial relationship rather than actual involvement.

However, railing, ranting and abusing someone simply because of info received about their family member, does not seem like it should be an acceptable course of action, although I could be wrong.

tpiaP:



I guess I should assume the answers to the question are specific to cultural contexts, more than individual ones.


Family members of a 419 person should first be confirmed to support such nefarious activities before being attacked for those imo, however, its possible guilt is assigned based on familial relationship rather than actual involvement.

However, railing, ranting and abusing someone simply because of info received about their family member, does not seem like it should be an acceptable course of action, although I could be wrong.

You are not wrong. People should not be insulted simply because they are related to wrong doers.

when I talk, people wonder what's the reason.

It might be difficult to seperate at first hearing/glance, but on a deeper thought, you will see that they should not be insulted cos they are two different ple!

.