pls advice! He claims to love me'bt his altitude is nt the same'He gets angry easily ,abuse me anyhow ;just name the fowl language he will use it'tthen he starts mentioning the amounts he gives every months 'this pains me to heart cos I manage and even add more to the expenses! Am just. tired!

paradises:
pls advice! the man is always nagging and abusing me emotional even at every slight offence!Beating me most times!like twice in a week

Beats you twice a week?

am wondering. and he his generous'bt when he is angry "he talks and talks untill you Will be forced to reply his craze'then he starts this abuse I wonder if he really loves as he claims

Your posts are not coherent...

Arranged marriage or did you date the guy yourself?

Nt arranged o!I lost count of his beatings!though he claims I was d one who provoked him'Its a major hole in my heart presently 'though he has stopped beating dis days'bt I also lost counts of his abuse verbally 'Pls can I go on wt the divorce plan!just tired

Nawa ooo, all these abuse stories

Just try separation and see how it goes... Has anyone talked to him about his character before?

Thought they said only women verbally abuse their partner

Have you ever been to see a psychiatrist together?

I hate divorce,but as someone said separation should be considered,sometimes absence can make d heart grow fonder and like another rightly commented safety first,both mental and physical safety

Another 'JIM' IKE CHUKWU on the lose!

paradises:
Am just. tired!

what do you think of doing?

This story just reminded me of a guy I came in contact with sometime ago; the very first time we had issues, he started his verbal abuse, started calling me names, started mentioning "all the money" he had spent on me. I was so shocked because I had always thougth that women are the ones known to be verbally abusive, never imagined that a guy could behave like that. And he was even pleading with me to accept his marriage proposal. I had to run as fast as my legs could carry me. I stopped receiving his calls, deleted all his contact, blocked him on fb and whatsapp.
My dear, life is too precious to be living with someone that will be making you angry all the time

This story just reminded me of a guy I came in contact with sometime ago; the very first time we had issues, he started his verbal abuse, started calling me names, started mentioning "all the money" he had spent on me. I was so shocked because I had always thougth that women are the ones known to be verbally abusive, never imagined that a guy could behave like that. And he was even pleading with me to accept his marriage proposal. I had to run as fast as my legs could carry me. I stopped receiving his calls, deleted all his contacts, blocked him on fb and whatsapp.
My dear, life is too precious to be living with someone that will be making you angry all the time

Na wa o, leave him for a while and go some place else.

MarvellousGod:
Nawa ooo, all these abuse stories

Just try separation and see how it goes... Has anyone talked to him about his character before?

Thought they said only women verbally abuse their partner

One of NL's fallacies

bukatyne:


One of NL's fallacies

You also propagate one of these fallacies
That nigerian marriages are shams

pickabeau1:


You also propagate one of these fallacies
That nigerian marriages are shams

Yes they are like the 'Nigerian' god is a sham

bukatyne:


Yes they are like the 'Nigerian' god is a sham

glad you know you are a fallacist
Every idle word....

I noticed that was missing from your thread

pickabeau1:


glad you know you are a fallacist
Every idle word....

I noticed that was missing from your thread

Excuse me?

I still maintain that 'Nigerian marriages', 'Nigerian god' etc. are sham so where is the fallacy

Or are you one of the posters who believe that only women verbally abuse their men?

Besides, this thread is not about me; let the OP get the help she desires.

bukatyne:


Excuse me?

[s]I still maintain that 'Nigerian marriages', 'Nigerian god' etc. are sham so where is the fallacy

Or are you one of the posters who believe that only women verbally abuse their men?[/s]

Besides, this thread is not about me; let the OP get the help she desires.

You, a nigerian woman married to a nigerian man coming here to say that nigerian marriages are sham
HAHA.. i laff in spanish
If that is not confusion.. i wonder what it is


You are the one that mentioned fallacy here... i just mentioned one of the fallacies you propagate

pickabeau1:


You, a nigerian woman married to a nigerian man coming here to say that nigerian marriages are sham
HAHA.. i laff in spanish
If that is not confusion.. i wonder what it is


You are the one that mentioned fallacy here... i just mentioned one of the fallacies you propagate

Pick,

This thread is not about me

And yes, the Nigerian is in quotes.

Good day and focus on the thread/OP

bukatyne

Good day to you too

How did you miss all this during courtship period? An insultive talkative is usually easy to spot during courtship, or maybe you were growing old and felt you had to get married to him so you don't end up as an old spinster.
I would have said leave him, but I don't know how strong you are mentally to withstand the stigma that comes with divorce.....am sure that man has a girlfriend outside that's why he has forgotten that you are still his wife and he has to respect you.
Men own no pass cheating. Its something all men look forward to after marriage; like a rite of passage or something. And when they start having strong feelings for the girl outside they start seeing their wives as shit and as a source of inconvinience in their lives. I wonder why their unfaithful, STD carrying asses even bother getting married.

bellong:
Your posts are not coherent...

She has been hit on the head too many times

5minsmadness:

She has been hit on the head too many times

KanwuliaJara:
Another 'JIM' IKE CHUKWU on the lose!

haaa madam you don reach here when I was just about calling you. Na real Jim iyke love o

@paradises.
Your husband's good character
...he is generous...
...he professes his love for you...
...he has stopped beating you...which means he can stop his verbal abuse too.

Your husband's bad character:
He is verbally abusive
He is a nag
He is easily irritated.


Your good character:
You help in the house financially
You are patient with him

Your bad character:
You provoke him when he nags. This makes him angrier and triggers his verbal abuse.

Plan:
Pick out a night when he is calm and surprise him with some good cooking. After he has eaten, surprise him further by fucking his brains out. Then when you two are basking in the after-effect, mention to him how his verbal abuse hurts you. Don't do it like fight. You already know you are in the right in this matter, no need to prove anything. Quietly let him know how it hurts and repeat some if the more painful words he has said to you. I bet you he will apologise. Tell him also that his nagging irritates the hell out of you and that is why you react and respond which in turn provokes him. Tell him how you would want him to address matters e.g mention something once instead of repeating it over and over again.

Also allow him to talk and say the things that annoy/irritate/provoke him. Allow him talk without interruption, no matter how silly his points are. This will also let him get some things off his chest and you might even be surprised to find that it is something else that been bugging him since.

When you two have said your piece, have sex with him again. I assure you he'll behave himself for the next six months.

P.S. This method should be repeated every six months for best results.

5minsmadness


This your post - correct chips

Are u sure its not easier to just divorce

pickabeau1:
5minsmadness


This your post

Are u sure its not easier to just divorce

Do you know the procedure for divorce?
I do.

Trust me, my advice is easier. If it doesn't work out after 2 attempts then they can dive-orce.

freecocoa:
Na wa o, leave him for a while and go some place else.