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Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. - Family - Nairaland

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Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Worriedwife: 10:48am On Jan 08, 2017
This issue has been disturbing me, I had to create a new id to get advice 'anonymously', maybe someone else who has gone through this can help. My husband's dress sense is poor, his shoes look like weapons...pointed mouth with very heavy soles. His colour combination is something else. He is a good-looking young man but dresses like an old man.

It makes me not to find him sexy, even his boxers look like soccer shorts.
Whenever we go out, people look at him like he's my gate man. The other day, we went to visit some family friends and someone there said, we don't look like we came out from the same house.

You know how people can be, news have been going around that I am spending all his money on myself while he goes about tattered. My in-laws are also part of the rumour mongers. I have tried to teach him, but he's not ready to learn. Before the usual didn't you know when you married him questions, I knew. He kept saying I am just a girlfriend and I want to change him. Now I am his wife, he still won't change.

Please, what can I do? Won't it be rude if I throw his old wears away?
We recently moved to PH, I don't know my way around yet. Things look expensive here, where can I shop at a fair rate?
I need practical solutions. Thank you all

20 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Nobody: 10:51am On Jan 08, 2017
Divorce him, ASAP!

27 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by AntiWailer: 10:54am On Jan 08, 2017
U are comparing him with all those guys around.

Ok let's see if we can help.

.......

Look for a way to raise money. Get his measurements and swing into action.


1. Buy him the kind of shoes you like and keep the ones that annoy you away.

2. Buy him the kind of clothes you like also and keep the ones that annoy you away.

3. Decide your fit.

4. As for boxers, haha !! Buy fine ones for him.

Select clothes combination for him when he is going out.

My baby does that almost all the time. Before I am out of the bath, she would have selected the shirt, jacket, even the color of socks and my tie.

I am left to make only decisions on the shoe I wear and trust me when she wants to limit my shoe options, she selects a brown belt.

And even if I dnt like what she selected, as soon as I am in front of the mirror, I hear

"waoo u look so good".

"All those tea girls in your office should stay away else...."

So over period , I have trusted her selection and I dnt complain .

So do so with wisdom.

Appreciate him as much as u can.


There must be plenty "You LOOK so different moments too" so his head can swell and align.



******
Addendum...
****** Just today 10 Jan 2017, She got me a new trouser yesterday.
She made sure I wore it this morning by selecting it and guess the words as I entered my car

"Babe, I am tripping for u. This trouser is so smart on u"

I told her "thanks for my trouser God bless u"

My driver was even teasing me that I am lucky. I simply told him yes but I won't be this lucky if I came home drunk last night or if I beat her up.

My sister, u av no issues. U are so in charge of this. Just get into action. If hubby is worth it.

317 Likes 31 Shares

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Worriedwife: 10:55am On Jan 08, 2017
AntiWailer:
U are comparing him with all those guys around.
No, I am not!

5 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by 2SWT(f): 10:55am On Jan 08, 2017
You just have to bear, you noticed it before, he told you that you were just a girlfriend and you kept quiet l.


If you couldn't change him when you were just a girlfriend you can't change him now that you're his wife

As for the in-laws they always have something to say even if he was the one dressing nice and you dressing tattered. Ignore what they have to say

27 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Nobody: 10:56am On Jan 08, 2017
Now, this is the thing... Nobody cares, nobody was there when you said your vows so why should anyone give a single fĂșck?
Madam take your issues to a counselor or the divorce court if you are too brain dead to work things out.
I mean I have seen couples have issues over more serious matters like finances, infidelity, abuse but this ?
You need a psychologist

GTFO

71 Likes 7 Shares

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Nobody: 10:56am On Jan 08, 2017
I understand your concern_ it shows you care. I've seen women who don't care as long as it doesn't affect her own look.
Some men are like that, a woman would know the whole colour wheel (including cockroach brown and custard yellow) while a man is okay knowing just primary colours.

You say you have been correcting him? How did you correct him? We're dealing with a grown man here_ he has been dressing that way without seeing anything wrong in it, approach is very important. Don't insult him in the process, first compliment the quality, colour or fitting..."Shugar I love this shirt, the stripes are cool BUT it would have gone better with a carton-coloured-pants or brown shoes".

Most times they have a mental picture of how they wanna look, but they don't know how to SHOP.
You have to put in work, it's not by saying "hey, I hate your dressing, it embarrasses me"_ WHAT EFFORT HAVE YOU PUT IN, ASIDE THE USUAL TALK-TALK-TALK?

A long time ago, my man was such a rigid dresser_ always so officially dressed like we were going for a meeting. On my part, I loved the whole yipee dressing.
WHAT DID I DO? I bought him 1 or 2 wears first, I remember the look on his face when I got him tan brogues. 'Told him I wanna follow him when next he's shopping. We got there and I influenced his choices.

Now that I have more disposable income, I handle his closet, down to his briefs. I have specific tailors for natives,office/casual trousers and shirts. I know all his measurements down to his shoes. When we are watching TV, he says "see that clothe/shoe, I like it"...I quickly take a pic, go source for the material or a look alike and that's it. He doesn't know what they sell at School Rd, Ariaria, Kent...etc, his own is to wear and receive compliments. I don't have a problem with that, I am okay with him looking like 'my man'.

His dress sense now is 99.9%, everybody is happy now wink.
Please, note that you do not have to spend millions to dress well, you only need to know the right places to shop.
Try this, come back and buy me any whisky.

I'll edit if I remember anything else.

298 Likes 43 Shares

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by SafeDavid(m): 10:59am On Jan 08, 2017
Take him shopping.

4 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Worriedwife: 11:01am On Jan 08, 2017
lestat:
Now, this is the thing... Nobody cares, nobody was there when you said your vows so why should anyone give a single fĂșck?
Madam take your issues to a counselor or the divorce court if you are too brain dead to work things out.
I mean I have seen couples have issues over more serious matters like finances, infidelity, abuse but this ?
You need a psychologist

GTFO
No issue is more serious than the other. Go to divorce courts and hear how the simplest of issues break homes.
Thanks for the advice so far.

45 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Nobody: 11:05am On Jan 08, 2017
Worriedwife:

No issue is more serious than the other. Go to divorce courts and hear how very the simplest of issues break homes.
Thanks for the advice so far.

Here's the thing you are clearly not cut out for marriage if your issue with your hubby is his preference for Gran daddy shirts over a hawes and Curtis .

Grow up get help work on your insecurity, this is an indication of a deep rooted inferiority complex on your part ...

And seriously don't bug me again

8 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Nobody: 11:06am On Jan 08, 2017
Simple, buy his clothes for him, sew correct natives for him and bring the tailor along, so he(tailor) can ginger things
ajibolabd:
Divorce him, ASAP!
Make sure you never get married

11 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by AntiWailer: 11:08am On Jan 08, 2017
Worriedwife:

No, I am not!


Ok let's see if we can help.
.......

Look for a way to raise money. Get his measurements and swing into action.


1. Buy him the kind of shoes you like and keep the ones that annoy you away.

2. Buy him the kind of clothes you like also and keep the ones that annoy you away.

3. Decide your fit.

Select clothes combination for him when he is going out.

My baby does that almost all the time. Before I am out of the bath, she would have selected the shirt, jacket, even the color of socks and my tie.

I am left to make only decisions on the shoe I wear and trust me when she wants to limit my shoe options, she selects a brown belt.

And even if I dnt like what she selected, as soon as I am in front of the mirror, I hear

"waoo u look so good".

"All those tea girls in your office should stay away else...."

So over period , I have trusted her selection and I dnt complain .

So do so with wisdom.

Appreciate him as much as u can.

There must be plenty "You LOOK so different moments too" so his head can swell and align.

14 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Ginaz(f): 11:09am On Jan 08, 2017
Lestat why are you rude to the poor woman seeking for advice?

36 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Nobody: 11:09am On Jan 08, 2017
There's someone you compare him to!!!

Eliminate that distraction and you'd have the man you always loved.

8 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Worriedwife: 11:10am On Jan 08, 2017
lestat:


Here's the thing you are clearly not cut out for marriage if your issue with your hubby is his preference for Gran daddy shirts over a hawes and Curtis .

Grow up get help work on your insecurity, this is an indication of a deep rooted inferiority complex on your part ...

And seriously don't bug me again
No problem. I won't bug you again.

Thanks AntiWailer, Paperlace, Tadeknkeepcalm. I appreciate...

11 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Nobody: 11:19am On Jan 08, 2017
Ginaz:
Lestat why are you rude to the poor woman seeking for advice?

It's my opinion that marriage is for better for worse, now if he doesn't cheat, he doesn't beat her he provides for his family , he is caring but she is upset he doesn't look like he walked out of a GQ magazine?
The issue she should be facing is why isn't she happy with what she has and instead of bitching about it try and make things work ...
Trust me if she moves to another guy maybe the next issue will be why he doesn't shave his beard ?
She is shallow and naieve that's her issue .

22 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by sisisioge: 11:21am On Jan 08, 2017
grin grin grin

This is really simple babes, buy him a complete outfit. Make it simple and nice...Get him to wear it out with you then compliment him like kilode all thru the day. Plus reward him unusually at night. Hmmm, everybody loves looking good...He would take a new leaf.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by thelish(f): 11:21am On Jan 08, 2017
You will have to do the buying of the clothes. Buy what u think will be sexy on him. When he wants to go out, arrange them for him to wear. U can buy nice shoes as birthday gift to him. He will come around gradually. U can show him pics of guys on good cloth sense as well. He will admire them n change gradually. Hide all those Kok shoes so he doesn't wear them again.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by marshalcarter: 11:31am On Jan 08, 2017
buy him cloths nii...no be you be wifeundecided

1 Like

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by PresVA: 11:40am On Jan 08, 2017
lestat:


It's my opinion that marriage is for better for worse, now if he doesn't cheat, he doesn't beat her he provides for his family , he is caring but she is upset he doesn't look like he walked out of a GQ magazine?
The issue she should be facing is why isn't she happy with what she has and instead of bitching about it try and make things work ...
Trust me if she moves to another guy maybe the next issue will be why he doesn't shave his beard ?
She is shallow and naieve that's her issue .
nawa oo.. guy calm down..
she's only asking for advice, atleast she should try to get some solutions first, if it doesn't work, then you talk about for better for worse... and she never said she isn't happy with her man generally. ..
nothing bad wanting to make your man look better. .
I choose my husband's haircut style, most wears, shoes etcc... my husband used to cut his hair very low, almost to his skin but he stopped because of me...

will you say same thing if your woman dresses so badly and looks like an old woman?


op, just like most people have said... buy him the wears yourself if you can.. then follow him to his tailor...
there's nothing wrong in wanting your man dress better but don't let it be a cause for dispute. ..

all the best

45 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by teemanbastos(m): 11:43am On Jan 08, 2017
Hmmm
Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by teemanbastos(m): 11:48am On Jan 08, 2017
Many people don't dress stylishly because they don't care about dressing but you have to talk or better still.. Who are his friends and get them to talk to him or someone he takes as a father figure can talk him to dress not necessarily extravagantly but appreciably.
Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by UIA04(f): 11:49am On Jan 08, 2017
ajibolabd:
Divorce him, ASAP!

15 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by UIA04(f): 11:59am On Jan 08, 2017
lestat:


Here's the thing you are clearly not cut out for marriage if your issue with your hubby is his preference for Gran daddy shirts over a hawes and Curtis .

Grow up get help work on your insecurity, this is an indication of a deep rooted inferiority complex on your part ...

And seriously don't bug me again

Are you married?

25 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by mcdokwe(m): 12:22pm On Jan 08, 2017
You didn't do your work well as a girlfriend and you aren't doing it well as a wife either. Rather than gross about his dress sense, I will suggest you step up and assume responsibility for his wardrobe. I hope you are not the type that would say you're not a washing machine and watch him do his laundry?

I had a girlfriend (can't believe I can't stop talking about this girl) who wouldn't let me leave the house if I wasn't dressed as she deems good enough, she would follow me to the salon and insist on a particular haircut as against my idgaf mola, even though I pretended I didn't care, I enjoyed it and saw where she was coming from. So swerrie, there are better ways to make a statement, you can do that by dressing him up, it will definitely add romance to the marriage. If you're not very bouyant, make savings and get at least a pair of trousers and shirts that meet the way you want him to dress, make him admire himself in the mirror and watch if he would love to go back to the way he used to dress. Thank you as you make effort to become a perfect help meet.

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by MrsMurphy(f): 1:22pm On Jan 08, 2017
grin
Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by MARKone(m): 1:31pm On Jan 08, 2017
Lol u should have left him when you were just a "girlfriend", now he has wifed u, u r complaining. U saw the signs, u can't eat ur cake and have. I want to believe there are other good side of his, apart from dressing like KCee, bask on that and enjoy ur marriage.

1 Like

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Richy4(m): 1:42pm On Jan 08, 2017
If you donot have money to buy him cloths,...It is a matter of matching colours here and there....and maybe buying the shoes you know that will replace the weapon shoes you talked about... and picking a cloths that can match the weapon shoes u mentioned...

From day one, he sees nothing wrong with how he was dressing....Now that you have come into his life, there should be some difference....But you dear Lady, what where you guys talking about during courtship? How come you did not mention this while courting him...Because I believe he would have moved mountains for you just to get into your pants....or are u the type that complains later after marriage...

<<<Anyways Just Go to his wardrobe one beautiful Saturday afternoon as a mission <<< Bring out all his cloths and put it on the bed<<< match all his shirts and trouser by putting them in a hanger and some match it with ties that you have already knotted for him <<<Hang them on the wardrobe<<<That will be easy to grab when he is about to dress<<<He will complain..I know that for sure<<<<Tell him he can dress the way he want as a bachelor no problem, but now that he is married, he is no longer one person<<He will tell you that you saw him that way and fell in love<<<Tell him that you know<<<That You came into his life to clean him up.. wink

All your utterances must be with love please....If you have an acid tongue or mouth sharper than razorblades..stay clear of any small talk or ..just say you love him that is why you are doing all this...

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Abiagirl777(f): 1:53pm On Jan 08, 2017
lol,once when I was on I.T used to have this guy that was always disturbing me about marriage,so one day I decided to answer him at a nearby eatry on a weekend.mind you we were always on coveralls and safety boots so I didn't know what his dressing was like.
that day when I got his call that he was already there,I walked out .I almost retreated if not that he had seen me.omo! if you see his shoes,the soles were as big as with a very rigid square face. I walked in far ahead of him while he followed behind.i'm poor in the dressing dept and will not marry someone I'm better than.
memories...
but Op,you can help him,my husband buys most of my clothes,shoes,suggests hairstyles because he says I'm archaic,heck he even brought home some G-string panties home the other day.ppl compliment me more when I wear his than the ones I bought myself.you are his helpmeet,where he is inadequate you fill up for him

18 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Hector09(m): 1:58pm On Jan 08, 2017
Some men are like that...like me i dnt fancy dressing...

3 Likes

Re: Help, My Husband Dresses Like An Old Man, I Don't Find Him Sexy. by Worriedwife: 2:02pm On Jan 08, 2017
Thanks for all your advice. It's not like I am that fashionable, I am an average dresser...though I know I am better than him. The complains and sidetalks are getting much.
I will try downloading pictures to shop.
I must agree I have been a little bit harsh.

10 Likes 1 Share

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