₦airaland Forum

So if this is true one needs to ask, What are you benefiting so much in the marriage that is worth your life

Platnum1:
Forget abt part two, go down on ur knees and pray for your home. They say the first few months/years of a marriage comes wit too many challenges. Pray,u need it.

Really?? Tell me about it. . .

Rachaelfrancis:
my marriage is just 10 months old.

Ok

Rachaelfrancis:
when I and my husband were dating,I used to think he was a very sweet guy because he made me believe so. He is ten years older than I but looks young except for his white hair

How do your husband make you believe he was nice? Gifts? Money? Actions?

Rachaelfrancis:
He took my virginity after our wedding

.

Good one

Rachaelfrancis:
when I got pregnant,he asked me if I wanted to keep the baby and I said 'of course'. he didn't act like he was happy. well,I still kept de baby.

If I get the timing right, you got pregnant after marriage. Why was your husband asking if you wanted the baby Did he ever discuss delaying childbirth? Did you agree? Was he financially buoyant? Could/can he provide for the baby? I get that you are not working/earning

Rachaelfrancis:
sometime later,he invited his mother to come stay with us and I refused and that was when the whole problem started.

Did he mean a permanent stay? Has he ever discussed/hinted it before? Is his mom old? Lonely? Not working?

Rachaelfrancis:
he started to be very stingy with me,he won't drop money for me in case I needed sth to eat..one day I was cooking and de gas finished and I had no dime at home to go downstairs and eat..I stayed hungry till he came back.

Was this a reaction to you not agreeing to his mother staying or did he just choose that time to manifest?

Rachaelfrancis:
despite how weak I was,I cooked delicious meals for him taking my time. I cleaned de house,washed the toilet and of course gave him gud sex.

Did you ever confide in your husband that you were weak (as a result of your pregnancy) or were you doing power girl? Your husband is not a mind reader

Rachaelfrancis:
he stoped sleeping on the bed when I didn't let the mum live with us. he would masturbate in the sitting room instead of doing it with me. I got tired of complaining and let him be.

I am thinking that it is easier for your husband to move his mom into the house than wanking. It also seems he rather punish himself than be unfaithful to you. What was he really reacting to?

Rachaelfrancis:
he used to refuse to on the gen for long and I get very hot easily,he said he doesn't have money for putting on the gen.

Did he lack resources or was it part of his manifestation?

Rachaelfrancis:
I used my own money to buy fuel,when I came back,he asked me where I was taking the gen to and I told him I wanted to on the gen because pregnant women really feel hot he started to shout that I should go and buy my gen,that he would abort my baby if I tried him.

Ok, what was he really reacting to?

For me, it is easier to move his mother into your house than all these stress and drama. Was there any other issues apart from him mother?

Rachaelfrancis:
he started to beat me mercilessly,used bucket to flog my body,pushed a cushion on my body and it hit my tommy. that very night,I started to have serious contraction,i was rushed to the hospital. there and then,they checked me and confirmed my cervix was opened and I was almo losing my child and that I developed a high blood pressure...I am just in my mid twenties./

Here your husband had lost it and beat you mercilessly ( I am guessing because of the gen?) Why didn't you call your family to pick you up from the hospital?

Rachaelfrancis:
I cried that night. when I came home,he still was becoming worse,he will come home by 12,started to lock his phone but I did discover his code twice and saw his conversations with some people. I asked him to buy me baby things for our baby and he asked if money falls from trees.

What conversations did you see? Care to share?

Are you sure your husband doesn't have financial issues?

Are you still pregnant?

Rachaelfrancis:
watch out for part 2 of this story soonest but all I do know is forgiveness in this case wil be very hard. he doesn't deserve me!

Before we watch out for part two:

The first step is not forgiveness, it is resolving the issues

1. I do not think your MIL move is a major issue; something else is biting him. Have you seen your MIL after your wedding? Is she sick? Disabled? in need of special care?

2. The beatings are unacceptable. If he is still pounding you, move out of the house and resolve your issues amicably

3. I think there is no communication between you two. What really changed him from caring to warrior? Did you change from what brought out the sweet him?

4. He doesn't deserve you.... hmmmm! let us get to the bottom of this first.

Would like your feedback

Bukky is this really coming out of your brain or fajyna .what the hell is all this question and answer session. Smh



you just fall my hand finish I

bukatyne:
Ok



How do your husband make you believe he was nice? Gifts? Money? Actions?

.

Good one



If I get the timing right, you got pregnant after marriage. Why was your husband asking if you wanted the baby Did he ever discuss delaying childbirth? Did you agree? Was he financially buoyant? Could/can he provide for the baby? I get that you are not working/earning



Did he mean a permanent stay? Has he ever discussed/hinted it before? Is his mom old? Lonely? Not working?



Was this a reaction to you not agreeing to his mother staying or did he just choose that time to manifest?



Did you ever confide in your husband that you were weak (as a result of your pregnancy) or were you doing power girl? Your husband is not a mind reader



I am thinking that it is easier for your husband to move his mom into the house than wanking. It also seems he rather punish himself than be unfaithful to you. What was he really reacting to?



Did he lack resources or was it part of his manifestation?



Ok, what was he really reacting to?

For me, it is easier to move his mother into your house than all these stress and drama. Was there any other issues apart from him mother?



Here your husband had lost it and beat you mercilessly ( I am guessing because of the gen?) Why didn't you call your family to pick you up from the hospital?



What conversations did you see? Care to share?

Are you sure your husband doesn't have financial issues?

Are you still pregnant?



Before we watch out for part two:

The first step is not forgiveness, it is resolving the issues

1. I do not think your MIL move is a major issue; something else is biting him. Have you seen your MIL after your wedding? Is she sick? Disabled? in need of special care?

2. The beatings are unacceptable. If he is still pounding you, move out of the house and resolve your issues amicably

3. I think there is no communication between you two. What really changed him from caring to warrior? Did you change from what brought out the sweet him?

4. He doesn't deserve you.... hmmmm! let us get to the bottom of this first.

Would like your feedback

It's just so easy for some to crow 'Divorce!!!!'.

No suggestions as to counselling, trial separation, family meeting, nothing. Just...'Divorce!!!!!!'.

Cococandy, sambarry et al, you guys should form a divorce meet-up group already.

Y do I think this story is fake

Gaborone:
It's just so easy for some to crow 'Divorce!!!!'.

No suggestions as to counselling, trial separation, family meeting, nothing. Just...'Divorce!!!!!!'.

Cococandy, sambarry et al, you guys should form a divorce meet-up group already.

someone is hitting a pregnant woman with objects and they should consider family meeting and counseling?
So that what will happen? They will get back together and he will finish the job Abi?
It's easy to take life for granted until you die.

Other things are salvageable but not violence.
erm if you want to counsel on family meeting pls do, but ignore my post while you do.
You can encourage her to endure it and hope she doesn't die in it, I don't think it's up to you to tell me to do the same.

cococandy:
someone is hitting a pregnant woman with objects and they should consider family meeting and counseling?
So that what will happen? They will get back together and he will finish the job Abi?
It's easy to take life for granted until you die.

Other things are salvageable but not violence.
erm if you want to counsel on family meeting pls do, but ignore my post while you do.
You can encourage her to endure it and hope she doesn't die in it, I don't think it's up to you to tell me to do the same.

I know violence is involved, but your string of advice championing divorce may be getting too long. I neither stalk nor follow you, but I know this much because 1 out of 2 of your posts I come across usually carry the divorce message.

Maybe you should tone down a bit.

are you minding it. Someone is living ina turbulent marriage and he's talking about counselling .it shows his level of intelligence quotient. Na team ruth abokoku



them dey knack bucket for bele wey ordinary food dey there person dey die not to talk of a pregnant woman attempting to murder a Tufiaaaaaaaaa

cococandy:
someone is hitting a pregnant woman with objects and they should consider family meeting and counseling?
So that what will happen? They will get back together and he will finish the job Abi?
It's easy to take life for granted until you die.

Other things are salvageable but not violence.
erm if you want to counsel on family meeting pls do, but ignore my post while you do.
You can encourage her to endure it and hope she doesn't die in it, I don't think it's up to you to tell me to do the same.

You why don't you stay in a place where you are slapped and beaten constantly and people say pray and go for counselling .then come back and tell me your experience .Before you rant put yourself in the other person's shoes.



And if you are part of those African apes that beat their wives you better buy rope and tie her neck and then be bringing grass for her to eat

Gaborone:
I know violence is involved, but your string of advice championing divorce may be getting too long. I neither stalk nor follow you, but I know this much because 1 out of 2 of your posts I come across usually carry the divorce message.

Maybe you should tone down a bit.

Gaborone:
I know violence is involved, but your string of advice championing divorce may be getting too long. I neither stalk nor follow you, but I know this much because 1 out of 2 of your posts I come across usually carry the divorce message.

Maybe you should tone down a bit.

That's your business.
If someone says her life is in danger my first advice will be to run. Always. And that's only when I say such.

Not that I owe you any freaking explanation nor will I foolishly consider saying someone should work on a relationship where there is danger so that busybodies like you won't blab nonsense.
But it's quite annoying and presumptuous of you. That you actually expect me to tailor my post to your reading pleasure.

Maybe if it's a non issue I'll pass without commenting. So if you happen to always see only my comments that involves running away from the abuser, it means that's the only threads I deemed it fit to comment on.
You could type your own suggestion instead of counting who's saying what.

Lol OP pls stay and let him hit you with the buckets and rods he can find so until the baby falls out of your womb.
That's not really what I want to type but I'm typing it so that Gaborone won't be offended

Gaborone:
It's just so easy for some to crow 'Divorce!!!!'.

No suggestions as to counselling, trial separation, family meeting, nothing. Just...'Divorce!!!!!!'.

Cococandy, sambarry et al, you guys should form a divorce meet-up group already.

Mr Ruth abokoku shebi you have sister . give her to amugbo husband for him to be punching her everyday since you don't know the value of women

SAMBARRY:
Bukky is this really coming out of your brain or fajyna .what the hell is all this question and answer session. Smh



you just fall my hand finish I

I guess she fell your hand with her wise counsel, because she didn't scream 'divorce' excitedly like you. She took her time to ask reasonable questions, while proferring viable solutions. I guess that's why your hand was 'felled'.

If you don't already follow her, maybe you should, so you can learn how to be wise, and comport yourself like a lady.