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Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? - Family - Nairaland

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Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by ZebaReba: 1:36pm On Jul 04, 2015
Hello. I posted a question last week about my relationship issues. We mutually agreed to end it as we remained untitled and i don't want to be the one claiming all the time.

pls share tips on how to move on in your 30s. Am confused. Most men can se me as old even though im petite. I need some advises on how to move forward. Am having a hard time surviving this breakup and i know i need to be strong.
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by coogaluta(f): 1:47pm On Jul 04, 2015
Nawa oo undecided
I no even know what to say sad
Make I just dey one corner as the comments troop in


I'm sorry about your break-up cool
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by lunaticfringe: 1:48pm On Jul 04, 2015
What exactly do you have in mind
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by absoluteSuccess: 1:49pm On Jul 04, 2015
Dont be discouraged baby, a new day is on the horizon, your day.

2 Likes

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by baby124: 1:51pm On Jul 04, 2015
ZebaReba:
Hello. I posted a question last week about my relationship issues. We mutually agreed to end it as we remained untitled and i don't want to be the one claiming all the time.

pls share tips on how to move on in your 30s. Am confused. Most men can se me as old even though im petite. I need some advises on how to move forward. Am having a hard time surviving this breakup and i know i need to be strong.
It may seem hopeless for you. But take your time. Don't be desperate and don't settle for less than you deserve. I know a lady that was in her 30's who rushed to marry a man that she would never have. After marrying, better suitors in their 30's started coming her way. She was now with a man she knew was not the best she could do. Just wait for God's appointed time and your man will come. Be careful and don't go on rebounds. Go on Dates with many and get to know them and wait for a while before you have sex, after determining his seriousness and running the required STD tests. Your man is coming, don't rush

11 Likes

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by ZebaReba: 1:52pm On Jul 04, 2015
Crying. I really don't know where to start.
Ive not done anything wrong to deserve this whole thing. I've just been so unlucky with being responsible throughout my life.
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by ZebaReba: 1:52pm On Jul 04, 2015
baby124:

It may seem hopeless for you. But take your time. Don't be desperate and don't settle for less than you deserve. I know a lady that was in her 30's who rushed to marry a man that she would never have. After marrying, better suitors in their 30's started coming her way. She was now with a man she knew was not the best she could do. Just wait for God's appointed time and your man will come. Be careful and don't go on rebounds. Date seriously and wait for a while before you have sex, after determining his seriousness and running the required STD tests. Your man is coming, don't rush

Thanks a lot
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by funlord(m): 1:53pm On Jul 04, 2015
grin OP! Try 2 focus on building a career or your bizness during this period! You would feel better and fulfilled and you may even meet a guy along the line that is searching 4 someone like you! Age is nothing but a number and only _stupid men reason along those lines! Do your thing!

7 Likes

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by baby124: 1:54pm On Jul 04, 2015
ZebaReba:


Thanks a lot
You are welcome. Think of it as an opportunity to start fresh. Eat healthy, exercise and achieve new things. The one for you is probably strategizing on how to approach you.

1 Like

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Jorussia(m): 1:56pm On Jul 04, 2015
ZebaReba:
Hello. I posted a question last week about my relationship issues. We mutually agreed to end it as we remained untitled and i don't want to be the one claiming all the time.

pls share tips on how to move on in your 30s. Am confused. Most men can se me as old even though im petite. I need some advises on how to move forward. Am having a hard time surviving this breakup and i know i need to be strong.
How old are you?I know of a very close female relative who got married at about 32.It depends on your stature and may be looks.my close relative has a small statue and beautiful. She is over 36 now,but she looks 25.
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by ZebaReba: 1:57pm On Jul 04, 2015
I'm 30.

1 Like

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Jorussia(m): 2:09pm On Jul 04, 2015
ZebaReba:
I'm 30.
At age 30,You will still get a good man to marry.Sometimes, delay is necessary for us to get the best.To me,i believe, its better for a lady to marry late,and enjoy her marriage, than marry early with regrets.You might be surprised, in next 9months you will be getting married and you will enjoy the marriage. Don't present your self very cheap to a guy,just because you want to get married. Above all,commit every thing to the hand of God.

9 Likes

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by 400billionman: 2:12pm On Jul 04, 2015
1. Do not ever beg a man to take you to his family.

2. When you start a new relationship, do not pile pressure on your partner for any reason. Do not call him more than once a day. Act like you forgot calling him for a day or two. This requires a lot of discipline.

3. Men naturally chase after girls who know their self worth. A person like me, once I am pressured by a girl, you won't see me again. Why the rush ?

4. Be open to any guy who wants to get close to know you because you do not know the real one among them. Do not sleep with any of them till he has shown commitment, seeing your people or you seeing his people.

5. There is no hard and fast rule to relationships. Love at first sight exists. If you meet your soul mate, you wont need to pay any attention to Nos 1 to 4, because everything will just fall into place.

8 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Chubhie: 3:05pm On Jul 04, 2015
ZebaReba:
Crying. I really don't know where to start.
Ive not done anything wrong to deserve this whole thing. I've just been so unlucky with being responsible throughout my life.
I will tell you where to start. Eat some healthy balanced meals, make a habit of hitting early morning jog-6am to 6:30 and shower once you get back. Learn to appreciate good music, dress smart and smell sweet. You may need to demolish all you've become till now and recreate yourself to be the person you wish to met.

Above all, you need to be anchored spiritually. Find what works for you- islam,jewish,Christianity,Buddha,new age etc. Learn a new language and travel to some place interesting if you have the means.

Your man may yet meet you while you are busy doing your thing and enjoying existence and trust me he won't let you slip by him.

If I'm your ideal man, what difference and value are you bringing to the table? Please don't tell a guy like me SEX cos with zero naira I can Bleep my brains out If I want to. You have to first value and appreciate who and what you stand for before another can say THIS IS THE REAL DEAL.

Lol at you crying now! If you work smart on yourself you would be happy he walked. Humans and how they underrate themselves!!!! Pele my dear.

12 Likes 1 Share

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by mredwifeosband: 3:10pm On Jul 04, 2015
My dear

3 Likes

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by ZebaReba: 3:10pm On Jul 04, 2015
Thanks Chubhie and 400billionman.

I'm very well gainfully employed. Money is not a problem and I've never shoved it down anyone's throat. I've been disappointed one too many times so I don't even now how to pick up the pieces to move forward. I've turned down so many responsible men for my ex all because I loved him and didn't want to cheat. That's why I'm crying. It's confusion and shame all together

1 Like

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by 400billionman: 3:16pm On Jul 04, 2015
ZebaReba:
Thanks Chubhie and 400billionman.

I'm very well gainfully employed. Money is not a problem and I've never shoved it down anyone's throat. I've been disappointed one too many times so I don't even now how to pick up the pieces to move forward. I've turned down so many responsible men for my ex all because I loved him and didn't want to cheat. That's why I'm crying. It's confusion and shame all together

The pressure I was talking about has nothing to do with finances. I am referring to emotional pressure. Trying hard to push the hands of the clock on the relationship.

Guys run from desperate ladies.
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by 400billionman: 3:16pm On Jul 04, 2015
Hi Jayne2014
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Nobody: 3:25pm On Jul 04, 2015
ZebaReba:
Crying. I really don't know where to start.
Ive not done anything wrong to deserve this whole thing. I've just been so unlucky with being responsible throughout my life.

I'm so so sorry for your heartbreaking break - up. Emotional traumas aren't always easy to bear.

Actually, you lose nothing being responsible. It's so sad that bad things actually happen to good people. That's the crazy world we're in. Shit happens.

I'll suggest you take it easy on yourself. Follow the good comments posted here. Take it all easy. Time will heal all your hurt. That I'm sure.

When we lose good things, better ones just come by.

Life isn't fair. Things aren't cast in stones.

For now, engage in things that can distract you. Please. Be engaged. An idle mind is a formidable tool in the hands of the destroyer. Be occupied.

There's nothing wrong with you. When people walk away from your life, let it go. It doesn't mean they're bad people. It may not mean you're bad either. It may just mean their part in the story is over. Let it go.

Thank God for the better one coming ahead. Be grateful. Nothing lifts a soul than sincere gratitude.

I hope these few words will help?

You may mention MizMyColi!!!!

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Nobody: 3:28pm On Jul 04, 2015
ZebaReba:
Crying. I really don't know where to start.
Ive not done anything wrong to deserve this whole thing. I've just been so unlucky with being responsible throughout my life.
You really don't have to cry.. As long as you did nothing wrong, the break up happened for a reason. . Who knows maybe God just averted a terrible marriage for you. . Isn't a broken relationship better than a broken marriage?

Just keep being yourself sis, improve in areas you think that need improvement. . Your man will come soon smiley

Also, try and find happiness in other areas of life.. by all means be happy. . Don't attach your happiness to marriagea dear...

2 Likes

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Chubhie: 3:35pm On Jul 04, 2015
ZebaReba:
Thanks Chubhie and 400billionman.

I'm very well gainfully employed. Money is not a problem and I've never shoved it down anyone's throat. I've been disappointed one too many times so I don't even now how to pick up the pieces to move forward. I've turned down so many responsible men for my ex all because I loved him and didn't want to cheat. That's why I'm crying. It's confusion and shame all together
Forget bout the offers you turned down you could probably have ended up in bad shape than this. You said you've been disappointed one too many? What seems to be a re occurring theme in all the breakups?

Don't you think you need to apply wisdom of some lessons learnt in previous relationships? I understand as an emotional being you need to love but don't love too much beyond the love and respect he has for you at any particular time.

Good to know you are doing okay it means you can hold your own.

This is how you pick up the pieces- you will humble yourself and bend down and slowly pick up the broken pieces for you to move forward. You shall be laughed at from those guys you did shakara for and a loss of Respect from your family if they are not understanding. Give all of them temporary victory and hit your gym to design a new winning you. The sweet thing is only you determines when and how this all ends.

You will work hard to reclaim your lost powers. It won't be easy but it will be worth it. People will always talk but develop a thick skin.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Jayne2014(f): 3:48pm On Jul 04, 2015
400billionman:
Hi Jayne2014
Hello
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Jorussia(m): 3:53pm On Jul 04, 2015
Jayne2014:

Hello
I just checked your profile picture, mehn you are a damn bitch.
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by kepstone: 4:15pm On Jul 04, 2015
Yes OP, I know what it feels to be 30 as a lady and still very much single, I am 30 last June, I have a job now I thankgod for were I am, but my girl left me and devasted all I started building with her for years, I spent my money on her and many stuffs, I was hoping to go down the alter with her to the isle but all she could tell me was I am not attracted to you, you are jot my type bla bla, all becos a rich guy came for her. I wept truly as a guy I did cried sha, not out of weekness but from the point of strength to offload the whole pain. I talked to myself , guy its over you deserve something better, she was not meant to belong to your life. I let every just go like that not minding d money spent. Today I have many more prettier girl attracted to me, but not in a rush to ask her out, please just take your time and ignore won't you marry you are getting old, I have heard that numerously but I said let me wait on God, he designed me for some of and someone for me. What ever it will take you pls focus on God, yourself, career and your love ones and let the God who designed you for somebody lead that person to you. He may not come in the package you want but your ability to discern him is the ability you need ma, please be strong and hope in God. Never let it crush you whoever left you walked out of there miracle. If you are a good person soon you will look at the ring finger and d right ring will be in there by the right guy. Do not rush for the ring without knowing the man giving the ring, embrace yourself love you, celebrate you, and pamper you. Learn from this and work on what needs to be worked on but the ultimate allow God to work on you for the kind of man he is sending your way. Cheers.

7 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by ZebaReba: 4:27pm On Jul 04, 2015
You people have really helped to regain my lost confidence and increase my self esteem to where it ought to be. Thank you all for the kind comments especially from those with similar experiences. All I can say is God bless you all. I know I've been crying too much but I can't stop. Each time I remember how much time I wasted, my heart cracks again to pieces. I wanted to pray this morning but I couldn't because I know I still have unforgievenss in my heart towards him

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by ElDeeVee(m): 4:49pm On Jul 04, 2015
MarvellousGod:
You really don't have to cry.. As long as you did nothing wrong, the break up happened for a reason. . Who knows maybe God just averted a terrible marriage for you. . Isn't a broken relationship better than a broken marriage?

Just keep being yourself sis, improve in areas you think that need improvement. . Your man will come soon smiley

Also, try and find happiness in other areas of life.. by all means be happy. . Don't attach your happiness to marriagea dear...
Hmm nice advice Mrs, u give people advice like you've been around for a while...keep it up
Btw when will you advice me

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Jorussia(m): 4:54pm On Jul 04, 2015
ZebaReba:
You people have really helped to regain my lost confidence and increase my self esteem to where it ought to be. Thank you all for the kind comments especially from those with similar experiences. All I can say is God bless you all. I know I've been crying too much but I can't stop. Each time I remember how much time I wasted, my heart cracks again to pieces. I wanted to pray this morning but I couldn't because I know I still have unforgievenss in my heart towards him
follow me back,so i can send you PM with restriction/ hindrance.
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Nobody: 5:03pm On Jul 04, 2015
ElDeeVee:

Hmm nice advice Mrs, u give people advice like you've been around for a while...keep it up
Btw when will you advice me
Thank you smiley

Advice on what? grin
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by ElDeeVee(m): 5:09pm On Jul 04, 2015
MarvellousGod:
Thank you smiley

Advice on what? grin
Lol Don't worry when I'm ready, I'll mention you or pm u
My regards to d boss grin
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Nobody: 5:16pm On Jul 04, 2015
ElDeeVee:

Lol Don't worry when I'm ready, I'll mention you or pm u
My regards to d boss grin
Lol, alright. ..

No probs smiley smiley
Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Okeikpu(m): 5:19pm On Jul 04, 2015
Jayne2014:

Hello
Omaricham :*

Re: Any Tips For Starting A New Relationship In Your 30s? by Jorussia(m): 5:45pm On Jul 04, 2015
ZebaReba:
You people have really helped to regain my lost confidence and increase my self esteem to where it ought to be. Thank you all for the kind comments especially from those with similar experiences. All I can say is God bless you all. I know I've been crying too much but I can't stop. Each time I remember how much time I wasted, my heart cracks again to pieces. I wanted to pray this morning but I couldn't because I know I still have unforgievenss in my heart towards him
check your mail inbox,i sent a PM.

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