₦airaland Forum

Hi guys,
I am 32 and I met this girl who is 27 years old and I admired her and I didn't waste any time to express myself to her, we got talking and exchanged contacts, started chatting on whatsapp, and from then on, we got emotional and fell in love with each other, she had come to my house like three times now, I have always played it cool, we only make out, when I initiate sex she will tell me to hold on. Not now.
Anyway, one day she called me out on whatsapp and gave me a shocker! That she was in love with a married man, in fact that she has a thing with married men, and it has been so for her since she was in the University and that she's currently dating a married man whose wife and kids are staying out of town, but he owns an apartment in town, which she normally goes to spend the weekend with him.
The thing is, since she opened up to me about it, I have tried to persuade her to pull out of it, but she seems incapable of that. We promise ourselves love and make out, express how we love each other, but most nights she still goes to spend it with the man, on weekends when she closes from work, his driver picks her from the office, to her parents house, where she picks her weekend things and Jets off on a weekend cruise with the man.
Her parents are wealthy, she is working and earning a six figure salary but claims she just can't end it with the man anytime soon.
When I prodded her to know why she is so in love with a married man, she claimed the man has always been there for her, especially when she conceived for him, though it ended in a miscarriage cos she couldn't bring herself to abort it cos of her religious beliefs. She feels it is not easy to end a three year relationship that abruptly. If I threaten to leave her, she throws her hands up in exasperation stating that the man has been there before me, there's nothing she can do about it other than to give it time.
She has promised to call it quits before the year runs out, but I still feel she is not doing enough. She finds it easy to tell me about the man, but will not dare tell the man about me. She said it causes problems anytime she tells the man she wants to leave, because he has told her he will only let her go when she actually finds a man who has paid her bride price and is actually walking her down the altar.
I really love her and I think she loves me too, but I don't want to take the signs lightly, I really need advice from you guys whether I should damn the consequences and stick with her or just call it quits with her. I need to mention that I quite appreciate her sincerity, frankness and honesty in respect to this issue, but I feel she could do better. I feel her truthfulness and sincerity is a virtue, compared to most girls who are runs girls and would sleep with several men and still pretend to be Saints.
I need your candid advice. Please talk to me

Cc: lalasticlala
please do the needful, I need people's advice on what steps to follow.

Is she on facebook?

okay.. u wan put ur life?

Cutehector:
Is she on facebook?

Yes! And why do you ask?

saopauloman:
okay.. u wan put ur life?

What do you advice? Make I avoid?

PHLastborn:
What do you advice? Make I avoid?

marry her if she quits it before d year ends but if she didnt my man get ur mind off her .. she dont worth it ..jst my humble advise #peace

This kind mumu love gbakwa oku.

I know a lady who has dated this married man for over 6years now and still counting. She keeps fighting other much younger numerous girlfriends of this her sugar daddy without realizing that a woman's life is like a flower. She's about 33years now but looks like a ghost upon all the make-ups.

Bro, that thing dey like smoking, you don't quit until it quits you.

Please, don't share in her curses by marrying or continue dating her.

Such ladies never go unpunished, so run for your life bro.

Man! You are trying to pull a leopard from it skin - no doubt we should commend the lady in question for her honesty, but it does not translate into wife material. My guy stop trying to convince her to leave her married lover, rather, try to find love from those who will be ready to love you as you desired. If possible take a break from her and see the likely reaction.

Op make I advice u like say u be my only Blood brother.

She has succeeded in putting u in chains n now its ur turn.

1. Psychologically forget abt marrying her or having a future wt her becos u go suffer. If she asks abt marriage, tell her 2 give u time.
2. Believe that she belongs to the married man n u r jus d side bf.
3. Continue "chopping" ur own share wt a smile on ur face. Don't argue,don't be jealous. Keep ur swag together.
4. Don't let ur hustle fall.
5.Plan for thy own future-becos u af tried.
6.Don't cheat on her.

The above moves if well practised will mk u a free man.
She will end up picking u becos u have more loyalty dan d married man n She will be desperate for u with time.


#shalom

Let her carry on...go and look for another girl

Is this a joke or what? She told you she's cheating and is not ready to quit yet and you're here feeling bad? My guy free that babe. She still thinks she is hot cake. There are better people out there. Don't settle for one babe that is bold enough to tell you that she is cheating.

If she isn't ready to quit the relationship with the man...

You better move on. Some girls are just too stupid, dating a married man when they know fully well that the relationship won't yield anything good apart from sex.

Nonsense

then let her go

My dear OP beta move on cos dat issue na ha village person cos am. Buh d bad new be say d person don die tey tey and na even for sun dem bury am so u no fit go appease am self

SirJeffry:
I know a lady who has dated this married man for over 6years now and still counting. She keeps fighting other much younger numerous girlfriends of this her sugar daddy without realizing that a woman's life is like a flower. She's about 33years now but looks like a ghost upon all the make-ups.

Bro, that thing dey like smoking, you don't quit until it quits you.

Please, don't share in her curses by marrying or continue dating her.

Such ladies never go unpunished, so run for your life bro.

If you ask her, she will tell you that young single guys don't understand her. Now that I know of her sex romp with this man, I am tempted to ask... Is this what makes you claim that young single guys don't understand?

Anyss:
My dear OP beta move on cos dat issue na ha village person cos am. Buh d bad new be say d person don die tey tey and na even for sun dem bury am so u no fit go appease am self

Lol, you funny oh

yomi007k:
Op make I advice u like say u be my only Blood brother.

She has succeeded in putting u in chains n now its ur turn.

1. Psychologically forget abt marrying her or having a future wt her becos u go suffer. If she asks abt marriage, tell her 2 give u time.
2. Believe that she belongs to the married man n u r jus d side bf.
3. Continue "chopping" ur own share wt a smile on ur face. Don't argue,don't be jealous. Keep ur swag together.
4. Don't let ur hustle fall.
5.Plan for thy own future-becos u af tried.
6.Don't cheat on her.

The above moves if well practised will mk u a free man.
She will end up picking u becos u have more loyalty dan d married man n She will be desperate for u with time.


#shalom

Thank you for your advice, me sef just want dey chop, cos when I asked her how she would feel if I were to start dating another girl on the side, she boldly told me to carry on and just stopped chatting, I now remembered one rule about women (if she tells you to do what you like, abort whatever that thing is, there is trouble) I am just so disappointed with her, though I like her so much, cos she is fun to be with, but I think there are still better girls out there. Thank you

Your biitch is spending weekend with another fuccker
And you still need advice
Nigggggaaaaaaaa....huh!!!

...And you're 32 years old

t

fvck love.. y'all should end whatever it is u think u have, cos I don't see a happily ever after here✌

PHLastborn:
Thank you for your advice, me sef just want dey chop, cos when I asked her how she would feel if I were to start dating another girl on the side, she boldly told me to carry on and just stopped chatting, I now remembered one rule about women (if she tells you to do what you like, abort whatever that thing is, there is trouble) I am just so disappointed with her, though I like her so much, cos she is fun to be with, but I think there are still better girls out there. Thank you

U w

Kikiki. You are the side-boo. Pele. It happens

My main motivation is that all through my time wooing and dating girls, I have never allowed myself be discouraged by a girl telling me she has a man, I just feel no gurl is single, therefore I have what it takes to snatch any girl I like from her man.
Currently I have won this girl's heart, she loves me very well, she comes to my house, we kiss, and make out, but what I don't understand is why is it taking her a lifetime to call it quits with a married man who she knows doesn't come with a future. Were this to be a single guy am fighting over her for, I for understand but this matter tire me, abi the man dey use jazz?
For me I think the koko according to her na say the man is 40 and sexually hyper active pass most guyz, but even me sef sure for my own side via the sex part, just say she never try me. I no go lie, I gbadun the girl sha cos she is fun to be with and very lovely, but I no wan die of high BP just yet, so I go just find way dey collect my own offering, and be looku looku like Mavin

Dear OP, save yourself the stress and heartache, break off ties with her now. It's a good thing she told you, and it will be unfortunate to believe she will change all of a sudden.

Imagine getting married to her and she continues her ways, she will remind you that you knew she was was like before marriage.

That's my 2 kobo

Laveda:
If she isn't ready to quit the relationship with the man...

You better move on. Some girls are just too stupid, dating a married man when they know fully well that the relationship won't yield anything good apart from sex.

Nonsense

sex is something good,ladies can't do without it,that's why they always jump from one dick to another in the name of relationship.

She is DICKMATIZED,naija ladies won't easily let go of a good dick.

Dahveydson:
Dear OP, save yourself the stress and heartache, break off ties with her now. It's a good thing she told you, and it will be unfortunate to believe she will change all of a sudden.

Imagine getting married to her and she continues her ways, she will remind you that you knew she was was like before marriage.

That's my 2 kobo

No be lie you lie bro, I've brought the issue to her, but she swore to high heavens that I don't know her well enough, that once she is done with him, she is done.
I gave her instances where I have fled from my previous girlfriends who are married and with kids, yet still wanted me to do them, either claiming their husbands were not good in bed, or he doesn't touch them, another claims her husband is gay. It's a natural principle of life, wherever you like run to, once that man wey hold your mumu button comes calling , it doesn't matter where you are, you will run to answer. With the kind of power he holds over her, it would only take a short while before she runs back to tell him how bad I've been treating her.
I've just been afraid of being called a quitter, of not loving her enough to pursue her.
Me, I am tired!

PHLastborn:
No be lie you lie bro, I've brought the issue to her, but she swore to high heavens that I don't know her well enough, that once she is done with him, she is done.
I gave her instances where I have fled from my previous girlfriends who are married and with kids, yet still wanted me to do them, either claiming their husbands were not good in bed, or he doesn't touch them, another claims her husband is gay. It's a natural principle of life, wherever you like run to, once that man wey hold your mumu button comes calling , it doesn't matter where you are, you will run to answer. With the kind of power he holds over her, it would only take a short while before she runs back to tell him how bad I've been treating her.
I've just been afraid of being called a quitter, of not loving her enough to pursue her.
Me, I am tired!

Quitter? Not Loving enough?

You cutting her off has nothing to do with you being a quitter, remember it's your life, you have only one chance at this.

As for not loving enough, unless you mean not being foolish enough, which actually is a good thing.

My brother ur jst pouring water on a big stone. I sense dat u'v invested a lot of emotion into this so called relationship dats why ur still thinking on what to do. U knw she's not going to change any time soon so why u still sticking to her.

She jst keeping u as a back up plan just incase something bad happens. Becos belive me if that man decides to propose to her she's going to say yes in a heart beat

Also my mind they tell me say becos u never chop am yet NA em make u still stuck on her