Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,157,914 members, 7,835,053 topics. Date: Tuesday, 21 May 2024 at 02:38 AM

If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors - Car Talk - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Car Talk / If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors (29729 Views)

Some Mechanics Cannot Make Heaven - Read AIT's Presenter Ordeal With A Mechanic / 4 Tricks Mechanics Use In Extorting Money From Car Owners / Why Are Almost All The Mechanics In Lagos Heartless Or Wicked Abi Both Sef? (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (Reply) (Go Down)

If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by Timileyin(m): 2:27pm On Jan 12, 2016
- A mechanic will remove your hand and replace it will white girl's hand and say "o ma sise (it will work, its stronger)".

- If you stay too long in the hospital, they will sell your eyes and claim you came eyeless.

- My mechanic would have done an operation and forgotten to return the heart.

- He would remove a kidney and claim its not important and useless in my system.

- When you're down, they'll give you 2 knocks on the head and try to start you.

- If you still don't respond, they'll clean dust off you, use a tools to hit your head, nose and heart and try to start you again

- If you're weak, they'll increase your heart beat to make you work faster,

- They'll remove all veins they come across while working, say its just a design and it's not really needed.


What do you think?

263 Likes 20 Shares

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by henriettanenye(f): 2:34pm On Jan 12, 2016
They will insist your sickness is not only headache but also heart attack, malaria,typhoid fever,ulcer and the rest...and am gonna be like embarassed
lalasticlala abi na lie

55 Likes 7 Shares

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by Timileyin(m): 2:43pm On Jan 12, 2016
FP please

1 Like

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by redcliff: 4:40pm On Jan 12, 2016
Timileyin:
- A mechanic will remove your hand and replace it will white girl's hand and say "o ma sise (it will work, its stronger)".

- If you stay too long in the hospital, they will sell your eyes and claim you came eyeless.

- My mechanic would have done an operation and forgotten to return the heart.

- He would remove a kidney and claim its not important and useless in my system.

- When you're down, they'll give you 2 knocks on the head and try to start you.

- If you still don't respond, they'll clean dust off you, use a tools to hit your head, nose and heart and try to start you again

- If you're weak, they'll increase your heart beat to make you work faster,

- They'll remove all veins they come across while working, say its just a design and it's not really needed.


What do you think?

na this one dey vex me die..looool

38 Likes 1 Share

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by Nobody: 5:53pm On Jan 12, 2016
They'd perform operation on u and purposely remove one of ur kidneys so u can come back to them and buy kidney.

123 Likes 6 Shares

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by DGD1(m): 8:47pm On Jan 12, 2016
seriously!

guess we all forget the efforts of this guys to keep our cars on the road.
most are not educated but within a moment they fix what a graduate of Harvard and the likes couple to call a car.
how many of our so called mechanical engineering graduates can drain the oil off a car, some can't tell the size of a bolt by mere looking or feeling, bt with our *nigerian mechanic * you can't do freedom without knowing it
I can go on and on
they are not as bad as we portray them to be, because if they are, we would always ship our carss back abroad to change plugs, drain oil, and do some simple things

116 Likes 3 Shares

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by oNj(m): 9:48pm On Jan 12, 2016
He will treat you of headaches....


... Only for you to discover you now have typhoid

25 Likes

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by hobermener: 9:54pm On Jan 12, 2016
R

1 Like

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by Shehucom(m): 9:54pm On Jan 12, 2016
No be small thing. My mechanic loosed four bolts, replace only two and was like, two is enough, am like shey the manufacturer no Sabi say two is enough before they used four... I was like Raifu WTF do you mean

124 Likes 4 Shares

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by laprince(m): 9:55pm On Jan 12, 2016
Replace brain with grease. And say, Oga no worry, dis one go last.

64 Likes 1 Share

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by Letsgoandfuck(m): 9:55pm On Jan 12, 2016
You won't know when you decide to align someone's heart

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by okedoyinolabisi(f): 9:55pm On Jan 12, 2016
the comments here are hilarious

11 Likes

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by Yemzy6(m): 9:55pm On Jan 12, 2016
forgetting d heart.....very funny

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by amunkita(m): 9:55pm On Jan 12, 2016
U will come with Headache nd go with Kidney failure...

*You will come for appendices operation but come back with missing Kidney..

19 Likes

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by mrborntodoit: 9:56pm On Jan 12, 2016
A Naija Mechanic will steal a childs brain(box) and sell it to an adult as a brand new adult brain (box) !

A Naija mechanic would have deliberately switch people's liver and sell the best liver to the highest bidder !!

A Naija mechanic would buy 0.5 liters of blood and claim to have infused 5 liters (fuel things)

15 Likes

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by henrydadon(m): 9:56pm On Jan 12, 2016
yeah this are the kind of things that hit front page nowadays. ....oga seun sin just dey pile up
Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by dipopooo(m): 9:57pm On Jan 12, 2016
Haaaaaa dead body go plenty ooo

1 Like 1 Share

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by wristbangle: 9:57pm On Jan 12, 2016
When they perform operation on humans, they will say his/her blood is not the right colour hence need servicing. They will drain all the blood and replace it with engine oil. cheesy

13 Likes 1 Share

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by YoungB1a(m): 9:57pm On Jan 12, 2016
grin
Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by Helkayklassic(m): 9:58pm On Jan 12, 2016
They will claim your leg is not original since you didn't get it from Ladipo.

36 Likes 1 Share

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by johnwizey: 9:58pm On Jan 12, 2016
Dey will remove ur eyes from their socket and place it on ur forehead telling u it's better dat way or its a new design undecided

15 Likes

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by KingEbukasBlog(m): 9:58pm On Jan 12, 2016
grin
Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by Nobody: 9:58pm On Jan 12, 2016
Lols...una no go kill person with laugh

1 Like

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by olaboy001(m): 9:59pm On Jan 12, 2016
Timileyin:
- A mechanic will remove your hand and replace it will white girl's hand and say "o ma sise (it will work, its stronger)".

- If you stay too long in the hospital, they will sell your eyes and claim you came eyeless.

- My mechanic would have done an operation and forgotten to return the heart.

- He would remove a kidney and claim its not important and useless in my system.

- When you're down, they'll give you 2 knocks on the head and try to start you.

- If you still don't respond, they'll clean dust off you, use a tools to hit your head, nose and heart and try to start you again

- If you're weak, they'll increase your heart beat to make you work faster,

- They'll remove all veins they come across while working, say its just a design and it's not really needed.


What do you think?
Nigeria mechanic?
Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by PLANETMARS(m): 9:59pm On Jan 12, 2016
fr

1 Like

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by Nobody: 9:59pm On Jan 12, 2016
grin


My Mechanic will remove the part of your brain that controls temperature and say it is not necessary in Nigeria.

12 Likes 1 Share

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by html14java(f): 9:59pm On Jan 12, 2016
Laughable

8 Likes

Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by ademega(m): 10:00pm On Jan 12, 2016
funn
Re: If Nigerian Mechanics Were Medical Doctors by kennosklint(m): 10:01pm On Jan 12, 2016
Change u 4rm male to female hange u 4rm male to female

2 Likes

(1) (2) (3) (4) (Reply)

HELP: My Car Is Consuming Too Much Fuel. / Lagos Restricts Danfo Drivers To 8-Hrs Of Work / How To Fix Your Car's Air Conditioner (Photos)

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 30
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.