₦airaland Forum

WHY WONDERFUL GODLY SINGLES END UP IN WOEFUL BAD MARRIAGES - Part 1.
My counsel for the singles with my personal experience series.

Why godly sisters who kept themselves end up in marriage that is not better than ungodly ladies who even misused themselves, who abused their bodies with immoralities.

It is pathetic that many wonderful, godly, humble and fervent sisters serving God, who keep themselves and abstain from youthful lust in schools, immoral activities in services and workplace but eventually end up in a no bad, no good marriage. The same thing is applicable to many wonderful brothers who fervently serve the Lord, keep themselves from immorality and sinful pressure and pleasure but to end their “single” journey in an unpleasant marriage. With my personal experience, with the revelation and inspiration of the Holy Spirit, I discovered several reasons WHY WONDERFUL GODLY SINGLES EVENTUALLY END UP IN A WOEFUL BAD MARRIAGE. Please patiently read along, you may have something to learn.

Let me briefly start with single sisters – when I mean “sister” I mean a young lady who has been saved by Christ Jesus. Here are some of the reasons many wonderful sisters end up in bad marriage:

1, MISCONCEPTION: Some years back, I was in a marital relationship with a Christian lady (I got myself into several relationships with my trial and error before God got me into the right one), we were working towards marriage, and then I had nothing financially and materially, and she was ready to support my vision. But one day she came to me with her church’s daily devotion book – Open Heaven, and shared with me what she read in the devotion, the writer talked about single getting married, that a man must have provisions financially and materially to take good care of a woman before thinking of getting married, he then quoted Genesis chapter, that God provided everything needed before God created Adam, so a man must put everything in place before marrying a woman. I have come across people using this same Bible interpretation. This Bible interpretation is not only wrongly quoted but badly misinterpreted upside down.

God created everything not before He created Eve but before He created both Adam and Eve, so it wasn’t Adam who provided everything before God gave him Eve. People are misinterpreting it as if - in their mind – God created Adam into empty garden, then Adam worked and God blessed him with vegetables, fruitful trees and then He gave him Eve. You know the implication of this misconception? It leads to wrong conclusions! Pastors, parents and churches counsel their single ladies that a man must have provisions available that will take good care of his wife, and so many missed the will of God for their lives and eventually married a so-so brother.

When I was single, I usually tell single sisters, “I don’t have a Television or financial provision at the moment, but I do have a vision that would provide for my future.” But I discovered that many of those sisters cared for the present than the future because of the misconception theory of provision-before-proceeding –to-marriage. I remember a lady I asked to pray about marital relationship with me, she later said before she would hear anything from God, I must first get accommodation, but I had no accommodation. Some would say a man must have a good job, car, etc. this misconception has made many wonderful sisters to miss the right will of God for their dear lives and they later settled down with next-to-the-will-of-God.

Many parents and churches are misleading their single sisters because of the present conditions of brothers who are the right will of God. Is it not stupid to judge by a present situation? Who are you to conclude on the destiny of a man because of his present situation? Having a present provision today does not guarantee prosperity tomorrow, and having no provision today does not guarantee poverty tomorrow. What really matters is vision in the provision. Do not miss God’s will for your life by evil judgment of human evaluation of people’s destiny.

As I continue with my own story, I came across this Christian sister who was to be the will of God for my life, and yet I had no accommodation, no job, no car but with a vision that would provide for my future. She accepted my vision with faith. When I was to visit her parents in Ibadan, I had no good shirt, and no transport fair from Akure and no money to buy fruit wine for her parents; she gave me money to settle all that. Can you imagine? I was in stark poverty, but busy working for God. Nothing attracted me to her except the my God’s given vision. Eventually I got married to this beautiful Christian lady from a comfortable home, a second class-upper Biochemist; she got married to me into my poverty because she believed I was the will of God for her. Serious! I will continue with how we got married and what happened later in the second part of this topic …she is now working as a production manager, executive special adviser to a CEO in a small company here in Abuja – I am the CEO, and the small company is our own.
Continues in Part 2 – reasons why many wonderful sisters end up in a woeful marriage
Subsequent Parts: why many wonderful godly brothers end up with wrong wives/ how to know a man of vision and a woman of virtue/ how to discover God’s will in marriage/ how to discover God’s will in business/ living to succeed, not just to survive. All these with my little personal experience and largely with the inspiration and revelation of the Holy Spirit.

You can follow this topic by adding me as your friend on Facebook or like our ministry page, just click on this link https://www.facebook.com/revelationoftruthevangelicalministries.rtem/

God bless you
Gideon Akande
One of the Evangelists @
Revelation of Truth Evangelical Ministries. RTEM
Abuja, Nigeria

From grass to grace, so nice.

But personally, I belong to the school of thought that believes that a man should create be able to take care of himself first before taking care of another person..

If one person in the union can support the home and there is love and mutual understanding, then I see no reason why they can not go ahead with the marriage. but if none of them can support the home, then wait until someone can.
Don't hate on that sister that had cold feet if she was also struggling to survive just like you. She was right, the family needs money to survive. If you did not have and, she doesn't have it then why rush into marriage? The one that married you did so because she had money to handle the situation until you get on your own two feet.

FreshGreen:
WHY WONDERFUL GODLY SINGLES END UP IN WOEFUL BAD MARRIAGES - Part 1.
My counsel for the singles with my personal experience series.

Why godly sisters who kept themselves end up in marriage that is not better than ungodly ladies who even misused themselves, who abused their bodies with immoralities.

It is pathetic that many wonderful, godly, humble and fervent sisters serving God, who keep themselves and abstain from youthful lust in schools, immoral activities in services and workplace but eventually end up in a no bad, no good marriage. The same thing is applicable to many wonderful brothers who fervently serve the Lord, keep themselves from immorality and sinful pressure and pleasure but to end their “single” journey in an unpleasant marriage. With my personal experience, with the revelation and inspiration of the Holy Spirit, I discovered several reasons WHY WONDERFUL GODLY SINGLES EVENTUALLY END UP IN A WOEFUL BAD MARRIAGE. Please patiently read along, you may have something to learn.

Let me briefly start with single sisters – when I mean “sister” I mean a young lady who has been saved by Christ Jesus. Here are some of the reasons many wonderful sisters end up in bad marriage:

1, MISCONCEPTION: Some years back, I was in a marital relationship with a Christian lady (I got myself into several relationships with my trial and error before God got me into the right one), we were working towards marriage, and then I had nothing financially and materially, and she was ready to support my vision. But one day she came to me with her church’s daily devotion book – Open Heaven, and shared with me what she read in the devotion, the writer talked about single getting married, that a man must have provisions financially and materially to take good care of a woman before thinking of getting married, he then quoted Genesis chapter, that God provided everything needed before God created Adam, so a man must put everything in place before marrying a woman. I have come across people using this same Bible interpretation. This Bible interpretation is not only wrongly quoted but badly misinterpreted upside down.

God created everything not before He created Eve but before He created both Adam and Eve, so it wasn’t Adam who provided everything before God gave him Eve. People are misinterpreting it as if - in their mind – God created Adam into empty garden, then Adam worked and God blessed him with vegetables, fruitful trees and then He gave him Eve. You know the implication of this misconception? It leads to wrong conclusions! Pastors, parents and churches counsel their single ladies that a man must have provisions available that will take good care of his wife, and so many missed the will of God for their lives and eventually married a so-so brother.

When I was single, I usually tell single sisters, “I don’t have a Television or financial provision at the moment, but I do have a vision that would provide for my future.” But I discovered that many of those sisters cared for the present than the future because of the misconception theory of provision-before-proceeding –to-marriage. I remember a lady I asked to pray about marital relationship with me, she later said before she would hear anything from God, I must first get accommodation, but I had no accommodation. Some would say a man must have a good job, car, etc. this misconception has made many wonderful sisters to miss the right will of God for their dear lives and they later settled down with next-to-the-will-of-God.

Many parents and churches are misleading their single sisters because of the present conditions of brothers who are the right will of God. Is it not stupid to judge by a present situation? Who are you to conclude on the destiny of a man because of his present situation? Having a present provision today does not guarantee prosperity tomorrow, and having no provision today does not guarantee poverty tomorrow. What really matters is vision in the provision. Do not miss God’s will for your life by evil judgment of human evaluation of people’s destiny.

As I continue with my own story, I came across this Christian sister who was to be the will of God for my life, and yet I had no accommodation, no job, no car but with a vision that would provide for my future. She accepted my vision with faith. When I was to visit her parents in Ibadan, I had no good shirt, and no transport fair from Akure and no money to buy fruit wine for her parents; she gave me money to settle all that. Can you imagine? I was in stark poverty, but busy working for God. Nothing attracted me to her except the my God’s given vision. Eventually I got married to this beautiful Christian lady from a comfortable home, a second class-upper Biochemist; she got married to me into my poverty because she believed I was the will of God for her. Serious! I will continue with how we got married and what happened later in the second part of this topic …she is now working as a production manager, executive special adviser to a CEO in a small company here in Abuja – I am the CEO, and the small company is our own.
Continues in Part 2 – reasons why many wonderful sisters end up in a woeful marriage
Subsequent Parts: why many wonderful godly brothers end up with wrong wives/ how to know a man of vision and a woman of virtue/ how to discover God’s will in marriage/ how to discover God’s will in business/ living to succeed, not just to survive. All these with my little personal experience and largely with the inspiration and revelation of the Holy Spirit.

You can follow this topic by adding me as your friend on Facebook or like our ministry page, just click on this link https://www.facebook.com/revelationoftruthevangelicalministries.rtem/

God bless you
Gideon Akande
One of the Evangelists @
Revelation of Truth Evangelical Ministries. RTEM
Abuja, Nigeria

When I saw ur post, I rush enter with seriousness, to read so that I won't make the same mistake, but am disappointed because you said nothing.
Why were you, a holy ghost brother hopping from sister to sister? You didn't pray for God's Divine direction, or God kept changing his mind as to ur rightful wife? You were playing trial and error with the sisters.
You didn't tell us how many you slept with and ate their food.
Did u not read the part of the Bible that says "A man who can't provide for his family is worst than an infidel?" As much as I don't subscribe to averies, but I won't Marry a men who doesn't have a bed. It must not be a big one, but a bed. And a pot, and a stove. And a plate and atleast a spoon.
Pls Bros, talk another thing.

Good for you that her family helped you up. But what if I don't ve a family?
Am not lazy, I work, but my man must be stronger than me.

I appreciate your opinion, though I have personal differences. Marriage is a long life institution ordained by God. It is meant to be enjoyed and not endured. It is very very important for a man to have something doing, no matter how small, before he ventures into it. Toherwise, what is meant to be enjoyed will be endured. I am not saying a man must have the whole world, but a little that can take care of the newly established home.

It is also good for ladies to marry a man of vision. Don't marry a man because he has television but because he has vision. Why? You may ask. A man of vision will put you on television, 3D, 4D and even on satellite.

analice107:
When I saw ur post, I rush enter with seriousness, to read so that I won't make the same mistake, but am disappointed because you said nothing.
Why were you, a holy ghost brother hopping from sister to sister? You didn't pray for God's Divine direction, or God kept changing his mind as to ur rightful wife? You were playing trial and error with the sisters.
You didn't tell us how many you slept with and ate their food.
Did u not read the part of the Bible that says "A man who can't provide for his family is worst than an infidel?" As much as I don't subscribe to averies, but I won't Marry a men who doesn't have a bed. It must not be a big one, but a bed. And a pot, and a stove. And a plate and atleast a spoon.
Pls Bros, talk another thing.

Good for you that her family helped you up. But what if I don't ve a family?
Am not lazy, I work, but my man must be stronger than me.

God bless u sis...i was wanting to metion u here but i wasnt diappointed when i read dis....pls help me tell him

what got me was the part where he said "open heavens" gave a wrong message to single ladies who were advised to marry a man who can provide for them, ...smh fine! if the will of God for me is not finacially buyoant fine, i will take that because i know it is God. God cannot put me in a plan that is not good unless he has a plan for me so i knw GOD definitely has a plan, but to open my eyes and willing marry a man without any means of income ...like are u serious...where do we leave our kids..

i prefer when both couples work together to build a home both financially and otherwie but i dont subcribe to outrightly marrying a financial handicapps i mean there should be something we can start up with. abeg i dont buy this man philosophy