₦airaland Forum

chimerase2:
Pls can I get a summary frm a good sammarittan

Out of hunger from excessive drinking, he went to his girlfriend's house, took protein and it was messing galore in the house.

agarawu23:
next episode loading soon......

So you are jobless and unemployed? No wonder you rant on nairaland!

By the way, i tried s hard to laugh at your story but it wasn't working! TRY HARDER NEXT TIME!!

the only funny thing here is the idea of coding ur fart in public, every thing else is unfunny, use people's criticism to build up stronger, don't coman be telling us in the comment sec tion that somebody just came from abroad or some body is a sole proprietor.

Hahaha. Funny

telll me our name before I will type a letter

laughs in AWORI !!!!!! Very funny indeed

Guy, you're astoundingly creative and hilarious.... Ur co-switching and co-mixing added aroma to the scent of ur write up... I love it to death!

Hahaha guy your sense of humour too much lolz

larry2chat:
i droped
the first batch "fiiieeee fiiieee" oh! Oluwa
seun na silent one. after few seconds the
sitting room started smelling dead rat and
spoilt eggs even the air fresher that is
hanged around the sitting room cant take the
smell, dey all fell down to the floor in
another seconds another droped from my
Bottom "fuuuuuuuu"


I'm just imagining right now how he will be bending his ass stylishly to drop the atomic bomb and how warm it will feel too

infact, you're the one that made me laugh lauder.ahaha.just the way you're bending yours abi.you just told me how you do drop atomic Bomb in secrecy and I'll be accusing TOLU for it not knowing you're the one ok.I don catch u. Fuuunnnnnn.silly boi.

Fiction

Lol... pls, I need permission to post this article in our school magazine... damn hilarious

Carlson001:
Lol... pls, I need permission to post this article in our school magazine... damn hilarious

feel free bro

larry2chat:
i droped
the first batch "fiiieeee fiiieee" oh! Oluwa
seun na silent one. after few seconds the
sitting room started smelling dead rat and
spoilt eggs even the air fresher that is
hanged around the sitting room cant take the
smell, dey all fell down to the floor in
another seconds another droped from my
Bottom "fuuuuuuuu"


I'm just imagining right now how he will be bending his ass stylishly to drop the atomic bomb and how warm it will feel too

hopefully, its not a wet, warm type that vibrates the anus, and seems like a little fluid leaked out

Wait! like seriously? who checked the day this joke was written?? mehn

Am I the only one that didn't find the joke funny at all?

everything about d story was extremely dry..like "extremely"

if this post can make fp today since 2014. Who say i no go make am?

chimerase2:
Pls can I get a summary frm a good sammarittan

Summarytan u mean?

agarawu23:
it was 8.30 a.m in the morning and i was still sleeping, was it due to the party i attended last night or the ogogoro i drank in mama bukky's joint? i guess no cos i am found of sleeping. Deep inside my sleep i had a heavy knock on my door, it was mama's voice, "òle omo alapamasise" (lazy boy with hands but cant work), look at the time you are still sleeping when your mates are out there making money. (my mother shouted! At the door entrance to my room.) her voice woke me up in anger and i had no choice than to stand because she will not stop knocking until she sees me outside. i finally stood up and went strainght to the sitting room, good morning ma! i uttered in a boned face, my mum just hissed and walked out of the sitting room. who cares? i quickly rushed to the kitchen to serve my hungry stomach but no food in the kitchen except from the remains of beans left over last night, i had no choice than to eat it.hmmmm beans again? you this boy, i said to myself, yes! I dont like beans because i am not always confortable anytime i eat beans, but what else will i eat? nothing. After eating the little beans, i am not yet satisfied cos little food no dey reach me. oh God!!! why this woman no cook? i asked myself in anger. then something quickly came to my mind, Bola! yes Bola my old time girlfriend, there is no day i visit her that she wont feed
me to my satisfaction. so i made up my mind to visit her, i quickly send her "pls call me" from my phone. cant u call her? a voice asked me, call wetin? when i dont have a kobo in my pocket talkless of credit to flash or call, mitcheww!!! stupid MTN, when will they
start giving free calls during the day? "awon oloshi" when will dis "mumu girl" saying (your account balance is too low for this call) die so we can start making free calls?, abegi! na dem sabi jare.


After two minute, Bola called me and i told her i will be visiting her this morning and she told me she is expecting me. early monday morning, you dey go woman house, you dis guy know dey shame. But wetin man pikin go do as i no get job nko? i have graduated since two years back with a second upper in accounting but all my effort to get a job is fruitless 'no be Nigeria'? if you dont have link with top people in office you cant get a job, what a Nation.


After thinking about my jobless life for a while, i quickly rushed to the bathroom to clean up and get ready to Bola's house. its now 9.35a.m and i am ready to go, chai!!! i will have to treck down to bola's house
again? Na wa ooooo. as i was walking down to bola's house, i started feeling little pain in my stomach. not again! the beans has started mixing with my intestine, i know the result of my taking beans but i had no choice.

Finally i arrived her house and with immediate effect she served me moi moi and pap(ogi) huh! beans again? no prob. after eating she asked me to join her family in the parlour to watch movie since her family are rich and they go to work anytime they wish. so i did. her father, mother, two sisters and two visitors were in the sitting room together with me and Bola. this time around the beans i ate at home and the moi moi bola gave me started mixing with full speed in my stomach, i knew where the result is going but i lock up and bone my face like a frustrated jobless folk I was.

After few minutes, Bola dad polluted loudly dat everybody heard the sound and knew the direction it came from but we all pretented that we heard nothing since he is the head of the family. wow! this is an opportunity for me to drop my atomic bomb boiling and mixing in my stomach o, so i dropped the first batch "fiiieeee fiiieee" oh! Oluwa
seun (thank God) na silent one. after few seconds the
sitting room started smelling dead rat and spoilt eggs, the air fresher that was hanged around the sitting room cant take the smell, dey all fell down on the floor. in another seconds another droped from my ass "fuuuuuuuu" the smell started again i notice that the fish in the aquarium had stop swimming and the colour of the paint in the sitting room started changing colour, Bola:- daddyyyyy! bola's dad :- emi ko oooo(no be me o) (staring at bola's Mum) that was when we noticed Bola's mum has fainted! ehn! she was sitting next to me but i didnt notice, the sound of the falling fishes from the aquarium woke her up, and yes! dis time around the fishes were all dead and the glass has broken too, i quickly told Bola that i am going and she nodded in agreement. o boy see speed.
tommorow is another day!!!

choi u for do wia all dez rats dey na,so dat we go rest wif lassa fever ish loooooooooolz

Had a more embarrassing experience.
Read here.. .

https://www.nairaland.com/2899410/embarrassing-gas-fart-story

kai...i no fit laff

aalangel:
Out of hunger from excessive drinking, he went to his girlfriend's house, took protein and it was messing galore in the house.

[quote author=aalangel post=42550565]

the news reaching us now ...is dat bolas mother is dead nd bolas father is being held responsible the news reaching us now ...is dat bolas mother is dead nd bolas father is being held responsible

agarawu23:
it was 8.30 a.m in the morning and i was still sleeping, was it due to the party i attended last night or the ogogoro i drank in mama bukky's joint? i guess no cos i am found of sleeping. Deep inside my sleep i had a heavy knock on my door, it was mama's voice, "òle omo alapamasise" (lazy boy with hands but cant work), look at the time you are still sleeping when your mates are out there making money. (my mother shouted! At the door entrance to my room.) her voice woke me up in anger and i had no choice than to stand because she will not stop knocking until she sees me outside. i finally stood up and went strainght to the sitting room, good morning ma! i uttered in a boned face, my mum just hissed and walked out of the sitting room. who cares? i quickly rushed to the kitchen to serve my hungry stomach but no food in the kitchen except from the remains of beans left over last night, i had no choice than to eat it.hmmmm beans again? you this boy, i said to myself, yes! I dont like beans because i am not always confortable anytime i eat beans, but what else will i eat? nothing. After eating the little beans, i am not yet satisfied cos little food no dey reach me. oh God!!! why this woman no cook? i asked myself in anger. then something quickly came to my mind, Bola! yes Bola my old time girlfriend, there is no day i visit her that she wont feed
me to my satisfaction. so i made up my mind to visit her, i quickly send her "pls call me" from my phone. cant u call her? a voice asked me, call wetin? when i dont have a kobo in my pocket talkless of credit to flash or call, mitcheww!!! stupid MTN, when will they
start giving free calls during the day? "awon oloshi" when will dis "mumu girl" saying (your account balance is too low for this call) die so we can start making free calls?, abegi! na dem sabi jare.


After two minute, Bola called me and i told her i will be visiting her this morning and she told me she is expecting me. early monday morning, you dey go woman house, you dis guy know dey shame. But wetin man pikin go do as i no get job nko? i have graduated since two years back with a second upper in accounting but all my effort to get a job is fruitless 'no be Nigeria'? if you dont have link with top people in office you cant get a job, what a Nation.


After thinking about my jobless life for a while, i quickly rushed to the bathroom to clean up and get ready to Bola's house. its now 9.35a.m and i am ready to go, chai!!! i will have to treck down to bola's house
again? Na wa ooooo. as i was walking down to bola's house, i started feeling little pain in my stomach. not again! the beans has started mixing with my intestine, i know the result of my taking beans but i had no choice.

Finally i arrived her house and with immediate effect she served me moi moi and pap(ogi) huh! beans again? no prob. after eating she asked me to join her family in the parlour to watch movie since her family are rich and they go to work anytime they wish. so i did. her father, mother, two sisters and two visitors were in the sitting room together with me and Bola. this time around the beans i ate at home and the moi moi bola gave me started mixing with full speed in my stomach, i knew where the result is going but i lock up and bone my face like a frustrated jobless folk I was.

After few minutes, Bola dad polluted loudly dat everybody heard the sound and knew the direction it came from but we all pretented that we heard nothing since he is the head of the family. wow! this is an opportunity for me to drop my atomic bomb boiling and mixing in my stomach o, so i dropped the first batch "fiiieeee fiiieee" oh! Oluwa
seun (thank God) na silent one. after few seconds the
sitting room started smelling dead rat and spoilt eggs, the air fresher that was hanged around the sitting room cant take the smell, dey all fell down on the floor. in another seconds another droped from my ass "fuuuuuuuu" the smell started again i notice that the fish in the aquarium had stop swimming and the colour of the paint in the sitting room started changing colour, Bola:- daddyyyyy! bola's dad :- emi ko oooo(no be me o) (staring at bola's Mum) that was when we noticed Bola's mum has fainted! ehn! she was sitting next to me but i didnt notice, the sound of the falling fishes from the aquarium woke her up, and yes! dis time around the fishes were all dead and the glass has broken too, i quickly told Bola that i am going and she nodded in agreement. o boy see speed.
tommorow is another day!!!

Guy! u get mouth. only you one pause air freshner with mess. Am sure the arena for catch fire if no be say bola Papa don finish im cigar before you show

Niza01:
Guy! u get mouth. only you one pause air freshner with mess. Am sure the arena for catch fire if no be say bola Papa don finish im cigar before you show

This boy Na badoo. I don laugh die.....

am not a fan of long epistles but I didn't regret reading this...hilarious indeed ;Dam not a fan of long epistles but I didn't regret reading this...hilarious indeed

tosyne2much:
OP, if I may comprehend what you are saying, are you implying Bola's family are also jobless that they were all present at home on a working day ?

Havent u visited rich people ?

When i had many sales boys and girls, i went to shop when i wanted to.

Am I the only one that didn't find the joke funny at all?

you've lost your sense of humour

Na real drama be this. I cant stop laughing. I knew Bola too cannot stop laughing too

Na real drama be this. I cant stop laughing. I knew Bola too cannot stop laughing

agarawu23:
it was 8.30 a.m in the morning and i was still sleeping, was it due to the party i attended last night or the ogogoro i drank in mama bukky's joint? i guess no cos i am found of sleeping. Deep inside my sleep i had a heavy knock on my door, it was mama's voice, "òle omo alapamasise" (lazy boy with hands but cant work), look at the time you are still sleeping when your mates are out there making money. (my mother shouted! At the door entrance to my room.) her voice woke me up in anger and i had no choice than to stand because she will not stop knocking until she sees me outside. i finally stood up and went strainght to the sitting room, good morning ma! i uttered in a boned face, my mum just hissed and walked out of the sitting room. who cares? i quickly rushed to the kitchen to serve my hungry stomach but no food in the kitchen except from the remains of beans left over last night, i had no choice than to eat it.hmmmm beans again? you this boy, i said to myself, yes! I dont like beans because i am not always confortable anytime i eat beans, but what else will i eat? nothing. After eating the little beans, i am not yet satisfied cos little food no dey reach me. oh God!!! why this woman no cook? i asked myself in anger. then something quickly came to my mind, Bola! yes Bola my old time girlfriend, there is no day i visit her that she wont feed
me to my satisfaction. so i made up my mind to visit her, i quickly send her "pls call me" from my phone. cant u call her? a voice asked me, call wetin? when i dont have a kobo in my pocket talkless of credit to flash or call, mitcheww!!! stupid MTN, when will they
start giving free calls during the day? "awon oloshi" when will dis "mumu girl" saying (your account balance is too low for this call) die so we can start making free calls?, abegi! na dem sabi jare.


After two minute, Bola called me and i told her i will be visiting her this morning and she told me she is expecting me. early monday morning, you dey go woman house, you dis guy know dey shame. But wetin man pikin go do as i no get job nko? i have graduated since two years back with a second upper in accounting but all my effort to get a job is fruitless 'no be Nigeria'? if you dont have link with top people in office you cant get a job, what a Nation.


After thinking about my jobless life for a while, i quickly rushed to the bathroom to clean up and get ready to Bola's house. its now 9.35a.m and i am ready to go, chai!!! i will have to treck down to bola's house
again? Na wa ooooo. as i was walking down to bola's house, i started feeling little pain in my stomach. not again! the beans has started mixing with my intestine, i know the result of my taking beans but i had no choice.

Finally i arrived her house and with immediate effect she served me moi moi and pap(ogi) huh! beans again? no prob. after eating she asked me to join her family in the parlour to watch movie since her family are rich and they go to work anytime they wish. so i did. her father, mother, two sisters and two visitors were in the sitting room together with me and Bola. this time around the beans i ate at home and the moi moi bola gave me started mixing with full speed in my stomach, i knew where the result is going but i lock up and bone my face like a frustrated jobless folk I was.

After few minutes, Bola dad polluted loudly dat everybody heard the sound and knew the direction it came from but we all pretented that we heard nothing since he is the head of the family. wow! this is an opportunity for me to drop my atomic bomb boiling and mixing in my stomach o, so i dropped the first batch "fiiieeee fiiieee" oh! Oluwa
seun (thank God) na silent one. after few seconds the
sitting room started smelling dead rat and spoilt eggs, the air fresher that was hanged around the sitting room cant take the smell, dey all fell down on the floor. in another seconds another droped from my ass "fuuuuuuuu" the smell started again i notice that the fish in the aquarium had stop swimming and the colour of the paint in the sitting room started changing colour, Bola:- daddyyyyy! bola's dad :- emi ko oooo(no be me o) (staring at bola's Mum) that was when we noticed Bola's mum has fainted! ehn! she was sitting next to me but i didnt notice, the sound of the falling fishes from the aquarium woke her up, and yes! dis time around the fishes were all dead and the glass has broken too, i quickly told Bola that i am going and she nodded in agreement. o boy see speed.
tommorow is another day!!!

I wan die for laugh here.

Am I the only one that didn't find the joke funny at all?

You didn't find it funny due to ur name thou