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Submission Or Slavery? - Romance (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumNairaland GeneralRomanceSubmission Or Slavery? (6887 Views)

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Re: Submission Or Slavery? by sheilak: 7:34pm On Feb 12, 2016
I have asked them to give me examples but they wouldn'tundecided

I don't even like that word regardless most women are pretty submissive to men they care about and a man who loves his woman would also submit to her. I understand flexibility, dependable team player and loyalty not I don't understand submission.

I am still waiting for an explanationsmiley. I wish someone would enlighten me today
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by Strahovski1(m): 7:35pm On Feb 12, 2016
A slave washes the feet of her master!

That's the fact no matter how you try to bend it
amokeme:
it is not, this is pure TRADITION... shows how well you are going to treat yur husband at home that's all, it has nothing to do with slavery, the bible or submission.

"women, be submissive to your husband and men LOVE your wife"
Some men have actually turned this part of the bible to their favor.
When you love a woman, you don't abuse her, you don't ask her to do impossible things all in the name of wanting her to submit. Love her and watch her submit naturally...
The only cons are abusive husbands (verbally and physically ) wanting their wife to be submissive undecided it doesn't work that way
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by KingEbukasBlog(m): 7:37pm On Feb 12, 2016
Seun:
Love is largely a feeling while submission is a practical act, so it's not similar. A husband can claim to love his wife while taking advantage of her submissiveness (if she is truly practicing the submissiveness, which fortunately is rarely the case). Also, the bible does not say that a wife should only submit if she is convinced that her husband loves her. Even if he is mistreating her, she is supposed to "submit" to him. That's bad.
The bible does not condone the abuse of women by their husbands , instead husbands should love and respect their wives . "Even if he is maltreating her... " - the husband breaks the law of God and expects submission from his wife ? Brother seun ! In a marriage laid on the foundation of God's word both parties play their roles in accordance to His rules


It means her husband has the final say in family matters.
Part of it ... agreed


If they disagree on an issue and she can't convince him, she must do what he wants.
Communication and understanding are very important in marriage - dont forget that . Then spirituality comes in , praying to God to help the both of you make the right decision . God does not fail , I mean we all know that smiley
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by lilmax(m): 7:39pm On Feb 12, 2016
To Nigerian women submission =slavery
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by amokeme(op): 7:40pm On Feb 12, 2016
Seun:
Love is largely a feeling while submission is a practical act, so it's not similar. A husband can claim to love his wife while taking advantage of her submissiveness (if she is truly practicing the submissiveness, which fortunately is rarely the case). Also, the bible does not say that a wife should only submit if she is convinced that her husband loves her. Even if he is mistreating her, she is supposed to "submit" to him. That's bad.
.
love is a feeling PLUS practice, I can claim to love someone and not practice it (show it) so they are similar.
How do you take advantage of someone's submissiveness while claiming yoy love them? (I really don't understand this part)

I don't agree with the bold. If God wanted it so, he would have stopped at "women be submissive" bit he didn't stop there, he knew it was necessary to include "husband love your wife" it's a pity we have over used the word "love"that people don't realise how deep it is.
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by KingEbukasBlog(m): 7:40pm On Feb 12, 2016
YourMain:
It's only slavery if she was being forced to do it.
You have a fine point there . And her willingness to do it fulfills the purpose of the ceremony's feet-washing tradition
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by Nobody: 7:47pm On Feb 12, 2016
KingEbukasBlog:
You have a fine point there . And her willingness to do it fulfills the purpose of the ceremony's feet-washing tradition
Mhm yeah. She didn't have to do it if she didn't want to.

And so what if she wanted to submit to him. Maybe he's a fine good man deserving of her submission.
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by KingEbukasBlog(m): 7:51pm On Feb 12, 2016
Acidosis:
Yea, the scene portrays a fetish culture
shocked... you are taking this too too far

Re: Submission Or Slavery? by amokeme(op): 7:51pm On Feb 12, 2016
sheilak:
I have asked them to give me examples but they wouldn'tundecided

I don't even like that word regardless most women are pretty submissive to men they care about and a man who loves his woman would also submit to her. I understand flexibility, dependable team player and loyalty not I don't understand submission.

I am still waiting for an explanationsmiley. I wish someone would enlighten me today
on?
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by sheilak: 7:54pm On Feb 12, 2016
YourMain:
Mhm yeah. She didn't have to do it if she didn't want to.

And so what if she wanted to submit to him. Maybe he's a fine good man deserving of her submission.
What will make a man deserving of a woman's submission?
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by sheilak: 7:54pm On Feb 12, 2016
amokeme:
on?
Submission
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by KingEbukasBlog(m): 7:55pm On Feb 12, 2016
amokeme:
that's the trick most women don't know... cheesy but you have to be submissive to a loving husband.
He plays by your rules and does anything for you cos he loves you ... wink
anybody male or female can advocate that, and it's for the good of the family too. Expecially if she is financially independent. She is suppose to be a help mate to her husband not a liability.
True that

Lol, are you kidding? Then you my dear have not seen evil
God forbid I meet a crazy woman !
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by sheilak: 8:02pm On Feb 12, 2016
KingEbukasBlog:
He plays by your rules and does anything for you cos he loves you ... wink


True that



God forbid I meet a crazy woman !
This is getting confusing

If he does anything for me because he loves me, that would mean a man is expected to make sacrifices and compromisessad. Then what exactly is submission if love means sacrifices and compromisessad
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by Nobody: 8:02pm On Feb 12, 2016
sheilak:
What will make a man deserving of a woman's submission?
Ehm I think it's different for every woman. But you cannot expect a woman to submit to a man just because she's a woman and he's a man. undecided
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by sheilak: 8:03pm On Feb 12, 2016
YourMain:
Ehm I think it's different for every woman. But you cannot expect a woman to submit to a man just because she's a woman and he's a man. undecided
That exactly is the point of this love and submission thing

Men should love an women should nbe submissive.
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by Nobody: 8:04pm On Feb 12, 2016
sheilak:
That exactly is the point of this love and submission thing

Men should love an women should nbe submissive.
Lol.
Because women aren't capable of love and men aren't able to be submissive ?
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by sheilak: 8:16pm On Feb 12, 2016
YourMain:
Lol.
Because women aren't capable of love and men aren't able to be submissive ?
Lol. Me sef don't know o.


That is why I wouldn't agree to that term without clarifying my positionundecided however personally I believe that love is the same thing as submission. If you are in a relationship where you care about the person, you would submit to certain things for the sake of love.

However the choice of terms connote something deeper especially the term ‘submissive'. If love can mean submission and vice versa, it does not follow that both words are mutually interchangeable. Usually Love can be submisson but submission cannot be love therefore I think submission carries a heavier burden than when love is submission. Therefore women are expected to make more sacrifices than mensmiley
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by Tallesty1(m): 8:17pm On Feb 12, 2016
amokeme:
if I'm to go by that scripture, the man is to do the washing.. since he is the head to the woman. As Jesus christ the head of the his disciples... I don't know how you understood that verse, but it's not applicable in this context. That exercise is highly spiritual. So let's leave it at that.
It is not spiritual ma, washing of feet is a work of servants. But in this context(John 13 : 4-17 and the pix above) it is a sign of humility and servanthood which are exactly what we need in our marriages.

The man also washes the woman's feet, thereby making two of them humble and servants of one another.

Again there's nothing spiritual in what Jesus did. During their time, people wash their dusty feet before they dine, but because they had no servant and because the apostles had argued who was the greatest in God's kingdom while they were on the road, Jesus decided to wash their to teach to be humble and to be servants of one another.
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by amokeme(op): 8:19pm On Feb 12, 2016
Strahovski1:
A slave washes the feet of her master!

That's the fact no matter how you try to bend it
Jesus washed the feet of his disciples, does that male him a slave? ?
sheilak:
Submission
it's simple.. love your wife and she will make you happy finish!
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by Tallesty1(m): 8:20pm On Feb 12, 2016
YourMain:
Ehm I think it's different for every woman. But you cannot expect a woman to submit to a man just because she's a woman and he's a man. undecided
I don't get it when ladies complain about this submission thingy.

Men were equally told to love their woman as Christ loves the church, ie to be ready to die for her. I think we should be the one to complain.
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by sheilak: 8:22pm On Feb 12, 2016
amokeme:
Jesus washed the feet of his disciples, does that male him a slave? ? it's simple.. love your wife and she will make you happy finish!
My husband is not Jesus. He can never be Jesus.

I wish it were that easy
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by firstking01(m): 8:27pm On Feb 12, 2016
Rubbish....comon sense should 've told you that she's only telling us that she's gonna be submissive...this is far from slaveryundecided
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by Nobody: 8:27pm On Feb 12, 2016
sheilak:
Lol. Me sef don't know o.


That is why I wouldn't agree to that term without clarifying my positionundecided however personally I believe that love is the same thing as submission. If you are in a relationship where you care about the person, you would submit to certain things for the sake of love.

However the choice of terms connote something deeper especially the term ‘submissive'. If love can mean submission and vice versa, it does not follow that both words are mutually interchangeable. Usually Love can be submisson but submission cannot be love therefore I think submission carries a heavier burden than when love is submission. Therefore women are expected to make more sacrifices than mensmiley
Sigh. I kinda agree. But if it's a situation where you're always yielding to his wishes even if it's against what you want then it begs the question does he really love you ? If he honestly loved you he'd be content with who you were and he wouldn't ask you to change and become this person you weren't. He wouldn't ask you to submit to things you aren't happy with. Yes we all have to make compromises but what is he doing ?

Why would a woman have to make more sacrifices ? It makes no sense ? Just because she happens to be born female shouldn't have to be some sort of thing that should ever hold her back. Especially if it was a situation where she was putting in more into the relationship than he was.
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by Nobody: 8:32pm On Feb 12, 2016
Tallesty1:
I don't get it when ladies complain about this submission thingy.

Men were equally told to love their woman as Christ loves the church, ie to be ready to die for her. I think we should be the one to complain.
Because it makes no sense!

Ehm? Where have you seen a man dying for his woman? That is not realistic. It's not going to happen.

What is the difference between a man and a woman that means anyone should have to be submissive? It's all about the person.

If he was a man that's respectable and honourable of course she'd be submissive why not ? The problem is you're asking someone to submit to another simply because he's a man. He was born a man. It's something that he couldn't control :/ why does he deserve any type of trophy or award for being a man?
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by sheilak: 8:42pm On Feb 12, 2016
YourMain:
Sigh. I kinda agree. But if it's a situation where you're always yielding to his wishes even if it's against what you want then it begs the question does he really love you ? If he honestly loved you he'd be content with who you were and he wouldn't ask you to change and become this person you weren't. He wouldn't ask you to submit to things you aren't happy with. Yes we all have to make compromises but what is he doing ?

Why would a woman have to make more sacrifices ? It makes no sense ? Just because she happens to be born female shouldn't have to be some sort of thing that should ever hold her back. Especially if it was a situation where she was putting in more into the relationship than he was.
Complicated really
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by Tallesty1(m): 8:44pm On Feb 12, 2016
YourMain:
Because it makes no sense!

Ehm? Where have you seen a man dying for his woman? That is not realistic. It's not going to happen.

What is the difference between a man and a woman that means anyone should have to be submissive? It's all about the person.

If he was a man that's respectable and honourable of course she'd be submissive why not ? The problem is you're asking someone to submit to another simply because he's a man. He was born a man. It's something that he couldn't control :/ why does he deserve any type of trophy or award for being a man?
Trophy? So submitting to him is an award? You gotta be kidding.

Listen we ain't talking about just any man here, we are talking about husbands and wives.

A man that comes to your dad's house to ask for your hand in marriage loves you already and you ought to submit to him until he gives you reason to do otherwise.

He will love you the more if you submit to him and will eventually make you the head of the home.
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by takuradua: 8:47pm On Feb 12, 2016
sheilak:
Complicated really
Remodelled and rebuilt.#tripping
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by sheilak: 8:47pm On Feb 12, 2016
takuradua:
Remodelled and rebuilt.
I don't understand
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by takuradua: 8:50pm On Feb 12, 2016
sheilak:
I don't understand
The new you.
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by sheilak: 8:51pm On Feb 12, 2016
Tallesty1:
Trophy? So submitting to him is an award? You gotta be kidding.

Listen we ain't talking about just any man here, we are talking about husbands and wives.

A man that comes to your dad's house to ask for your hand in marriage loves you already and you ought to submit to him until he gives you reason to do otherwise.

He will love you the more if you submit to him and will eventually make you the head of the home.
This is a fairy talesad
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by sheilak: 8:52pm On Feb 12, 2016
takuradua:
The new you.
Nope

I was banned na
Re: Submission Or Slavery? by Nobody: 8:52pm On Feb 12, 2016
Tallesty1:
Trophy? So submitting to him is an award? You gotta be kidding.

Listen we ain't talking about just any man here, we are talking about husbands and wives.

A man that comes to your dad's house to ask for your hand in marriage loves you already and you ought to submit to him until he gives you reason to do otherwise.

He will love you the more if you submit to him and will eventually make you the head of the home.
Yes. It is an award. Submitting to someone means putting aside your own needs and wants and letting someone else come first.

Oh right. So because you've signed some papers, you stop being whom you are and start being an empty minded shell to follow your husband up and down.

It's very simple. If you want submission from your wife earn it. Prove to her you're a man she can blindly follow and trust without having to fear. Just because you've and x and Y chromosome doesn't make you special. Sorry.
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