₦airaland Forum

Isn't it funny that the same Nigerian women who come here to complain daily about the barbarism of Nigerian culture when it doesn't favour women are the very same ones saying the widower didn't do right? Well, na look and laugh mode I dey.

donbenie:
Yes,am sure in your neck of the woods all you need to call a woman your wife is to pick her up from the street and start reproducing without going through the proper marriage rites,if insisting that a man marries a woman who has given him 4 children properly is primitive,then I would rather stick to my customs..the fear of repercussions for ones actions is what makes us to do the correct thing,so now you know the consequences of not marrying an Igbo woman properly..

hello!

do you know it has spiritual consequences.. getting married to a dead body

it's not even biblical to do such..

talking about morals.. why didn't d girl's family insist on a wedding after d first or second child?

it's very bad.. you can't see that happen anywhere in d world

so please spare me d sermon

Thank you for this, if you pregnant an Igbo woman, pls don't think that the baby is yours until you pay the dowry else o ga eme voom n'anya in Phyno's voice

kelechiodo:
Please sir, they are not overated and dont ever toy that line. The wife's family actually own all the kids as no dowry has been paid. What they did to him was just to give him the leeway to claim the children. Without dowry and no wedding of any sort, then the man is just absolutely childless.

flokii:
I tell you..

I mean who does that... more reason why I av problem with them

uncivilzed set of people... na only dem get 'CUSTOM & ANCESTORS'... rubbish

You don't have problem with them 'cos of this say the truth.

How many times have you witnessed this scenario.

You have problem with them because they are faster than you and smarter.

The man in question should go and plead with them, he didn't do well.

As for the culture it exists for a purpose, to breed responsible men.

First of all eliminate Oro festival in your culture and stop all the abobaku killing b4 you talk.
This culture is not killing anyone, 'just be responsible or be punished, u gerrit?

kelechiodo:
Please sir, they are not overated and dont ever toy that line. The wife's family actually own all the kids as no dowry has been paid. What they did to him was just to give him the leeway to claim the children. Without dowry and no wedding of any sort, then the man is just absolutely childless.

Such custom cannot pass the repugnancy test.

SIRKAY98:
Sorry to ask. Our forefathers how them they marry them self?. Any bride price? Ask some elderly ones.

I don't know whether you're being sarcastic but where I come you ain't got no claims to a child if you didn't pay the mother's bride price..the man's got himself to blame for his predicaments..

afroniger:
Siddon there. When the kids become adults, if they are smart they will look for their REAL biological father. And if they like they shouldn't na dem sabi. Nonsense custom. Mschew.

Stop that trash. Are there no DNA? if anyone try this shit with me.u go see fire ooooooo
Here in ogun state you dont try that rubbish with us oooo. Dont unhere the matter, 4kids on ground ,with 2new sets of twins?

If to say the woman did not die,and the children are grown to become president .and its d father that dies.u wount here all this trash oooo. I dey para mood for this matter.i wish make i be that man. Me i get money i get all it takes 2nd dead body go join d matter abeg

Nicepoker:
if money is the issue. Then the breeding tool should be used with care

yes it should, but it's not an automated thing and majority cant have total control over it. money issues is causing the man embarrassment. any attempt to take the children can only occur cause the man no get money

people using excuses for their foolish barbaric behaviours, some fools said he took advantage of her, did he charm her with four kids.

Ghost447:
Such custom cannot pass the repugnancy test.

And what is repugnant about expecting a man to do the honourable thing and marry a woman he calls his wife properly or does the word WIFE not get any definition where you come from..

kelechiodo:
Please sir, they are not overated and dont ever toy that line. The wife's family actually own all the kids as no dowry has been paid. What they did to him was just to give him the leeway to claim the children. Without dowry and no wedding of any sort, then the man is just absolutely childless.

Very well said!

Somehow these days everything that sounds a little discomforting to young people, trying to stop them from indulging in youthful exuberance is tagged "overrated"! Too bad things don't work that way.

Guys think they are enjoying, chopping and cleaning mouth while endangering the life of a lady whose dowry they haven't paid, when she dies, they begin to cry wolf!

Poor guy will have to marry that corpse first before anything.

donbenie:
I don't know whether you're being sarcastic but where I come you ain't got no claims to a child if you didn't pay the mother's bride price..the man's got himself to blame for his predicaments..

Bro.where i came from we dont welcome that too. Make we go court.u never see craze wey no get money.we go use anything settle this matter .i dey tell u...think it. 4grown up kids. 2new sets of twins?. If those children wey grow up when d mother was alive and they became president .will u here this kind matter form the family?

amicable09:
Very well said!

Somehow these days everything that sounds a little discomforting to young people, trying to stop them from indulging in youthful exuberance is tagged "overrated"! Too bad things don't work that way.

Guys think they are enjoying, chopping and cleaning mouth while endangering the life of a lady whose dowry they haven't paid, when she dies, they begin to cry wolf!

Poor guy will have to marry that corpse first before anything.

Gbagbe osi.forget poverty. Marry who? Am ready to die join oya. Am ready to die join. 2dead body oya.

The custom must be preserved, else the woman that died will get angry and clear their family (kill) it has happened before. Pride price must be paid no matter how little, I dey go church or I be muslim no dey this one as far as you are Igbo.

BaddieKay:
How can u carry someone's daughter and keep for ursef without paying bride price?That's the consequences for such Action.

As for your view on this issue, trust me, we may never agree if the things demanded of the deceased's husband is the appropriate consequence for his lack of timely action. I have a question though: per chance the man dies while he is yet unable to resolve issues with his in-laws, what then happens to the corpse of the wife, since her folks have elected to be unreasonable? On an aside, why do very poor people like compounding their misery and creating more problem for the world?

flokii:
hello!

do you know it has spiritual consequences.. getting married to a dead body

it's not even biblical to do such..

talking about morals.. why didn't d girl's family insist on a wedding after d first or second child?

it's very bad.. you can't see that happen anywhere in d world

so please spare me d sermon

Spiritual consequences? and Biblical injunctions..unfortunately you can't pick and choose which excerpt from the Bible suits your purposes,am sure nowhere in the Bible does it support cohabitation of a man and woman without doing the proper marriage rites..and how did you know whether or not the woman's people where disturbing the man to come and perform the marriage rites before now,you only heard the man's part of the story after all..

DikeOha882:
Thank you for this, if you pregnant an Igbo woman, pls don't think that the baby is yours until you pay the dowry else o ga eme voom n'anya in Phyno's voice

Could the custom be responsible for the proliferation of Baby factories in the SE?

amicable09:
Very well said!

Somehow these days everything that sounds a little discomforting to young people, trying to stop them from indulging in youthful exuberance is tagged "overrated"! Too bad things don't work that way.

Guys think they are enjoying, chopping and cleaning mouth while endangering the life of a lady whose dowry they haven't paid, when she dies, they begin to cry wolf!

Poor guy will have to marry that corpse first before anything.

trying to stop them for indulging or trying to make money out of them. If it's the issue of marrying the corpse now,I would have just termed it babaric tradition. but adding money to it shows babaric way of life.

Ghost447:
Such custom cannot pass the repugnancy test.

Which one passes repugnancy test?

Killing innocent pple to bury one pagan of a king (abobaku things) abi Oro festival rampage,

Killing innocent people everywhere? Answer

This one they are telling you to be responsible or we might make you responsible one day, so you want free wife and free children? Look elsewhere for that abeg.

Cruel customs! Barbaric customs!!. It's very irresponsible on a man's part not to know the marriage customs of his common law wife. Simple questions would have saved him all of this wahala. For those jumping up cos they just discovered new words in the dictionary, pray tell which modern culture should we adopt? Baby mama culture perhaps?

Live trash for LAWMA i beg.that family that is asking for marriage rites now? After death?what are they doing b4 ?this happens?

What if it was d lady that even loved d guy! At first instances? Because of this tradition you igbo ladies like 45,50 yrs they never see husband.

That could be the reason why a man called abuobaku was burried alive with the late oni of ife, its also the reason why we have so much incessant rape cases and armed robbery in southwest

AshiwajuFoward:
Could the custom be responsible for the proliferation of Baby factories in the SE?

amicable09:
Very well said!

Somehow these days everything that sounds a little discomforting to young people, trying to stop them from indulging in youthful exuberance is tagged "overrated"! Too bad things don't work that way.

Guys think they are enjoying, chopping and cleaning mouth while endangering the life of a lady whose dowry they haven't paid, when she dies, they begin to cry wolf!

Poor guy will have to marry that corpse first before anything.

Right. But then, was the woman under a spell? Point is; she knew this is what applies, yes she knows. Why did she stay? She would have saved the man this hot mess
I know this applies to most Igbo communities.
The man's gonna go through with this tradition even if he calls on the Authorities in Hague. Guys condemning this outcome would cry wolf if their daughter(s) goes co-habiting with a guy in the name of marriage.

donbenie:
I don't know whether you're being sarcastic but where I come you ain't got no claims to a child if you didn't pay the mother's bride price..the man's got himself to blame for his predicaments..

Which predicament are you talking about? Or you have not taking your time to study what the writer narrates.

Its sounds as if you are even from the wife's family?

My word for you is that when a sturborn man and a mad man meets and ressels one will run for each other! As far as i am concern about this matter

I cant pay anyone no matter the customs or tradition .i will follow what the Holy book said. That we should multiply and repllenish the heart. Keep your custom in your pocket ok. Mr sarcastic.

SIRKAY98:
Live trash for LAWMA i beg.that family that is asking for marriage rites now? After death?what are they doing b4 ?this happens?

What if it was d lady that even loved d guy! At first instances? Because of this tradition you igbo ladies like 45,50 yrs they never see husband.

Am sure all the women in your community are all "MARRIED" whether or not the proper rites were performed..and how did you know what transpired between the family and the man before now,you haven't exactly heard their side of the story..have you?

It happened to someone in my family. He never completed the full rites as would be expected if the woman were alive. He spent less than 80k. Make the man go negociate make dem lay the woman to rest.

SIRKAY98:
Gbagbe osi.forget poverty. Marry who? Am ready to die join oya. Am ready to die join. 2dead body oya.

Hahahaha. Marry who? Marry the late mother of the kids o. If you no die, the family will not relent especially if her parents are still alive. Her people will make sure you marry their daughter because;
You can't bring her corpse back to her father's compound to bury.
Worse is, she died while birthing YOUR seed. Which in some places won't be yours sef because you just dey help the lady's family with more children.

DikeOha882:
The custom must be preserved, else the woman that died will get angry and clear their family (kill) it has happened before. Pride price must be paid no matter how little, I dey go church or I be muslim no dey this one as far as you are Igbo.

Only if that woman that dies is an ogbanje and has made a convenant she will die at so so period.and if that man has fire of God nothing will affect him

why can't the senate make laws on child birth and make it constitutional? this man has no money and he is bringing children into this world?

DikeOha882:
That could be the reason why a man called abuobaku was burried alive with the late oni of ife, its also the reason why we have so much incessant rape cases and armed robbery in southwest

Why are you catching feelings and getting all defensive? I asked you a legitimate question, based on your own submission that this custom is meant to be a deterrent against premarital pregnancies. Everybody is aware of the prevalence of Baby Factories in the SE, so I only asked if there's a correlation since it'll be understandable for a girl with an unwanted baby to try to escape the stigma of ostracization by opting to ...sell the baby. Some of you can be so emotional.

antispexish:
trying to stop them for indulging or trying to make money out of them. If it's the issue of marrying the corpse now,I would have just termed it babaric tradition. but adding money to it shows babaric way of life.

The adding money is for cutting short the life of their daughter. If she were to remain alive, they know the joy that will feel having their daughter bury them not necessarily to be alive to give them money. The lady should have buried both parents and not die while cohabiting with a man somewhere.