₦airaland Forum

Berbierklaus:
[b]Grandpa no one asked you for your life history,so please relax and take to corrections.

if You were my husband/boyfriend,I would have told You to "shutup and listen" I said "Relax" coz You are my grandpa

Now to the argument You both are having,Everyone has an opinion,trust me I have come to understand You and your writeups,(You are only been realistic while most of us are striving to be idealistic).The challenge is finding a balance because all these rules and regulations for marriages and relationships are unique to every relationship,some men don't take NO,no matter how submissive the wife is(been realistic,I'm sure You will agree with me) and some men are in awe or their wives and a very agressive NO will do the trick(I'm been realistic),so the problem I have with most of your rightups is that "they are not a standard for relationships,coz every relationship is unique" but from your tone of words,You type like that's all that should be done because it is in the "BIBLE" forgetting that even Jesus said in "MARK 2:27" The sabbath(law) was made for man not man for the sabbath(law),
meaning most of this bible injunctions can be used uniquely not universally. (I hope You know what happened in that verse and why he made that statement?).


secondly,I want to say I agree with your rightup once again,although it is a little bit flawed "to me". Any idiot can see the emphasis You made on "WIVES SUBMISSION" I think its good but I also think it would have been appropriate if You emphasized as much on the "HUSBAND's LOVE". (I think this is where most relationship experts get it wrong).

Now lets use the scripture You qouted as an example,did You realise that Ephesians 5:33 has two parts(part A and B)
Did You realise that part A was talking to the husband?
Ephesians 5:33
However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself
Did You realise that the bible spoke to the husband first? That tells You that Submission is "EARNED" so its flawed for You to say "THE BIBLE SAID THAT THE WIFE MUST BE SUBMISSIVE TO HER HUSBAND NO MATTER WHAT"







because grandpa,the bible has put an unspoken condition in that verse,(You can't respect/submit to your abusive father,You "FEAR" him,likewise if You say wives should be submissive unconditionally,You are only telling her to "FEAR" him,that is not submission according to the bible)

Part B
[color=#000055]Ephesians 5:33
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord[/color]

Every man that loves his wife,automatically has earned her respect and submission,it is a known fact,and a man that doesn't love his wife(cheating on her "glaringly" abuse her,doesn't do his roles as a husband etc) will be "FEARED" not respected/submitted to).

So grandpa,all this tunranchi is what the bible is preaching(Idealistic) not what our pastors are interpreting the bible to, not what You have interpreted the bible to,which is sadly the (realistic) point of what we have in the world today because our religious leaders have knowingly or unknowingly led some men astray by repeatedly preaching and emphasizing on "SUBMISSION" while skimming through "LOVE".

The kingdom of God is a hot race,I fear for most people,as I have come to a stage in my salvation where,I read and ask the holy spirit to interpret and explain what this really means to me,instead of listening to one marriage counsel/counsellor and corrupting my heavenly journey .

I hope You will settle down and read my epistle,and may the holy spirit help You to realise the truth.[/b]

freecocoa:
If your life depends on me getting married, be rest assured I'd die a spinster, hahaha.

misspicy:
I wish I was that woman

I reject people like Toks2008 in Jesus name

Toks2008:
Did you say alone?

Im sorry to say this.... i am too cute,intelligent,financially stable and confident to be alone.

If you must know i could have a 3some every night and each night if i so desire so please stop fooling yourself with a presumed perception of who toks is.

I have a passion for writing and all i write here is independent of my persona but because you are not intelligent enough to understand my threads you will always troll. It is because of this anomaly in our today's world that has kept me from picking a lady yet.

If you must know, i am not on nairaland to look for a woman and i have never wooed any lady on nairaland in my 9years of membership.

I really pity the type of men or women that will make the big mistake of marrying an unintelligent person because that is a disaster.

Please tell me what on earth is the problem with this thread rather than troll.

I hate trolls.

Toks2008:
Do you know that you would have made more sense and sounded mature without the first paragraph?

I can't remember ever claiming to have monopoly of anything so why the unwarranted bitter rant?

Please you are a man so comport yourself as one.

nwamehn:
Ur view on certain issues might not always be acceptable to me but I sure love the way u respond to people here, especially the ones that come for e-war. Keep it up bro.

deathcomestoall:
I cannot believe you. A woman is disrespected and yet should give respect. You forget life is give and take. Means the woman should cheat too and her husband has no right to disrespect her. Pathetic.

oxmale:
I have been observing for some time and it's as if there are paid satanic agent on the internet whose mission is to thwart the messages of the gospel.
The wise will take the words of the OP and work with it while the foolish ones will reject it.
The woman was created for the man and not the man for the woman.
The book of genesis says the desire of the woman shall be for her husband. How to please her husband.
Ladies - Never say "I do" if you are not ready to submit to your husband.
No man in his right senses will reject a submissive wife.
Submission does not mean you are a slave. If your husband is not cool with something you are doing for instance and he corrects you, You must must accept and obey him.
He in turn must love you but it's your duty to constantly look for ways to please your husband.

Toks2008:
Amen bro..the unfortunate twist is that only few ladies who got the message appreciated while many ladies wjo are either still single or have gone through series of affairs keep bashing me. This is a clear signal that many ladies should remain single fore life rather than make themselves an object of ridicule by getting divorced.

If you refuse to submit to your man then you will continue to jump from one man to another because after the initial gragra wears out from the new man, he will get to know your real color and dish you for another lady.

I am not begging any lady to be submissive but i will urge the stubborn ones to continue in their delusion until they realize how late it has become.

This is an excerpt from my write up.

"No woman has any business with marriage or any serious romantic affair with a man until she is ready to "submit,honor,respect,reverence her husband to the maximum level just as she will respect the lord.Show me a submissive woman and I will show you a peaceful and lasting union.Being submissive does not mean you should obey your man blindly or go against the commandments of GOD neither does it make you a zombie or a mindless person but it means being meek,humble and serene even when you disagree with your man as many times as possible.Believe it or not,no matter how many relationships you get involved in,you will always have issues if you don't learn how to submit yourself to your man".

I still wonder what on earth is wrong with this simple lines.

I also wrote

"And as the man,for whatever reason you choose to marry that lady, if you are not ready to love that woman with her imperfections and without exception with behavior worthy of respect and esteem, always seeking the best for her with an attitude of loving-kindness all the days of your life please don't propose marriage to her".

The problem with many people is that they are too lazy to read and some who take time to read usually finds it hard to comprehend except few ..

Toks2008:
Nice question?

When I was growing up I usually watch indigenous movies and I noticed that many times the wife usually disagrees with the hubby but there is this calm and respectful manner they table their disapproval and at the end the man usually flows with them.

Olowo ori mi, oluwa mi, ade ori mi, my darling, sweet heart...are the magic words they start with and the man will just calm down to listen but in a situation where the wife just uses a high tone to disagree then wahala dey come be that.

No man wants another man as a wife in a sane world.

BornInApril:
Even queen Elizabeth refused to get married because she knows she is expected to submit to the authority of her husband.
Ladies never get married if you are not ready to submit.

Berbierklaus:
[b]Grandpa no one asked you for your life history,so please relax and take to corrections.

if You were my husband/boyfriend,I would have told You to "shutup and listen" I said "Relax" coz You are my grandpa

Now to the argument You both are having,Everyone has an opinion,trust me I have come to understand You and your writeups,(You are only been realistic while most of us are striving to be idealistic).The challenge is finding a balance because all these rules and regulations for marriages and relationships are unique to every relationship,some men don't take NO,no matter how submissive the wife is(been realistic,I'm sure You will agree with me) and some men are in awe or their wives and a very agressive NO will do the trick(I'm been realistic),so the problem I have with most of your rightups is that "they are not a standard for relationships,coz every relationship is unique" but from your tone of words,You type like that's all that should be done because it is in the "BIBLE" forgetting that even Jesus said in "MARK 2:27" The sabbath(law) was made for man not man for the sabbath(law),
meaning most of this bible injunctions can be used uniquely not universally. (I hope You know what happened in that verse and why he made that statement?).


secondly,I want to say I agree with your rightup once again,although it is a little bit flawed "to me". Any idiot can see the emphasis You made on "WIVES SUBMISSION" I think its good but I also think it would have been appropriate if You emphasized as much on the "HUSBAND's LOVE". (I think this is where most relationship experts get it wrong).

Now lets use the scripture You qouted as an example,did You realise that Ephesians 5:33 has two parts(part A and B)
Did You realise that part A was talking to the husband?
Ephesians 5:33
However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself
Did You realise that the bible spoke to the husband first? That tells You that Submission is "EARNED" so its flawed for You to say "THE BIBLE SAID THAT THE WIFE MUST BE SUBMISSIVE TO HER HUSBAND NO MATTER WHAT"







because grandpa,the bible has put an unspoken condition in that verse,(You can't respect/submit to your abusive father,You "FEAR" him,likewise if You say wives should be submissive unconditionally,You are only telling her to "FEAR" him,that is not submission according to the bible)

Part B
[color=#000055]Ephesians 5:33
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord[/color]

Every man that loves his wife,automatically has earned her respect and submission,it is a known fact,and a man that doesn't love his wife(cheating on her "glaringly" abuse her,doesn't do his roles as a husband etc) will be "FEARED" not respected/submitted to).

So grandpa,all this tunranchi is what the bible is preaching(Idealistic) not what our pastors are interpreting the bible to, not what You have interpreted the bible to,which is sadly the (realistic) point of what we have in the world today because our religious leaders have knowingly or unknowingly led some men astray by repeatedly preaching and emphasizing on "SUBMISSION" while skimming through "LOVE".

The kingdom of God is a hot race,I fear for most people,as I have come to a stage in my salvation where,I read and ask the holy spirit to interpret and explain what this really means to me,instead of listening to one marriage counsel/counsellor and corrupting my heavenly journey .

I hope You will settle down and read my epistle,and may the holy spirit help You to realise the truth.[/b]

Teespice:
same ephesians says that husbands should love their wives.

how can you expect a woman to submit when all you do is ill treat her. if you do her right, noting will stop her from submitting unless something is wrong somewhere.

As always, you are entitled to your opinion.

Toks2008:
Life is a give and take thing but when it comes to submitting to your husband please read what peter has to say

1 Peter 3:1-22

Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct.

The book of peters acknowlegde that some men will be outrightly sturbborn and unworthy of your submissiveness but still submit all the same cos you can make them change.

Gboyee4fun:
Don't worry about them, I can see that you have been raised by God to bring back the human being life by love, don't get discouraged, I don't know how I can send you a video of a great teacher so that it can encouraged you that you are on the right path....I can send it to you through Whatsap....08132278890

ElSherriff:
You miss the point, he didnt sound as though he had monopoly, he only showed passages from authoritative sources (the Bible and the Quran), now your postulation that love is reciprocal is not the bone of contention here, he didnt dwell on a give and take thing, he only showed what submission could earn a woman and that in my opinion maybe inadvertently earning the man's submission too! The circle starts from one point initially and if both parties do their bits, then it can be a peaceful big family circle. [s]Its me that know pass people like you shior[/s]

Ishilove:
Baba to segzy! Baba to sure baje!! Tall, dark and sexy

histemple:
You could have made your points without this unwarranted attack on the OP. If you think you are more knowledgeable, why not educate the house rather than this uncivil conduct?

From what I read, the OP merely expressed what he knows, perhaps based on experience or research.

Divinehealer:
Is men loving their wives as they love themselves as the bible states conditional?
So women submit is not conditional because bible orders it. But men love your wives is conditional? . Cant you see it's a two way thing? One bring the other. Woman is to ne submissive, man is to love his woman. Man loves, woman submits. Cos she knows he has her interest at heart.
That is the problem with people. They quote and remember the religious verses that favour them . Yes Bible says women submit but it also says men love and treat your wives like you would want to be treated.
It says children honour your parents yet it also says parents should not provoke their kids.
People just preference to ignore their own part and demand that others play along with the rules.

deathcomestoall:
Most of his posts are very flawed and he makes it appear as if he's struggling with his own relationship life, reason why he gives so much advice everytime. As the saying goes, those with so much advice have the most issues.

zeongeon:
If women or any woman has a problem with the word submission or fear your husband then I think they should take there fight to God and not to the men after all its God that inspired the word submission or fear for women in marriage.

How some women claim to love God and yet have a problem with his commandment of submission to there husband I don't understand...Ironically, you have more women in the church who claim to love God than men but yet find it so hard to obey the God they claim to love.

if you can't submit to your husband that you see is it God that you don't see that u want to obey and submit too.

If with God women want to play complicated.

@Toks2008 your on point. If any woman has a problem with Submission then go and pick your quarrel with GOD.

Berbierklaus:
[b]No be You? I know You will still twist everything

The bible already gave the condition that "Husbands 'LOVE' your wives"
Toks a wife will not respect/submit/fear her husband if he didn't do the instructions of God.

You are saying a man can/should disobey God but his wife can/should not disobey God.

That is the only part that I disagree with You on this subject and I still repeat that it is the men of God and relationship counsellors from Generations to Generations that have twisted God's ideal of a marriage role play,which is why many men "intentionally" treat their wives badly and still expect her to "submit" to them.

I see that You only use the bible in a way that suits your topic and logic but I want You to remember that the bible said in matthew 18:6 that
"If anyone causes one of these little ones--those who believe in me--to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.




Wisdom is for everyone only the wise ones makes use of it.[/b]

Iffffffy:
Treat your woman right and she will have no reason not to respect and submit to you.

Toks2008:
Absolutely but the question is..must you submit to him only if he treats you right?

Toks2008:
Nice question.

The issue of a man cheating will forever be a pain in the minds of many ladies but I'm so so sorry to tell you this truth that submitting to your husband is unconditional.

In submittion you can table your grievances and the fact that your hubby cheats on you is not a ground for disrespect. If you want to leave the union because of that then it's your choice but that must not make you disrespect him.

Your husband is your lord.

Iffffffy:
so, you expect me to be submissive to someone who treats me like trash?

Diplomaticbeing:
Hahaha! "Its me that know pass people like you shior" really? Well, I don't join issues with slowpokes, so swerve. Only engage me in dialog if you have the ability to reason beyond a penned than submission. Servitude is different from loyalty. By the way, I wonder who the hell told you and your ilks that everyone has the trashes called "holy books" as standard. Kindly look for your mates elsewhere.

Afribiz:
Mr man, I put it to u that u are in no way qualified to talk about marriage, cos u are so biased. I don't even see u as one who can make a happy home, with this ur ego.

Husbands love ur wives unconditionally, and wives submit to ur Husbands unconditionally. It's as simple as that. Why then are u stressing "submission" and giving conditions for the "love" which was actually the first order?

U come here to brag about ur personality and how u can freely hv 3some every nite, yet u hv the audacity to quote the Holy bible U son of lucifer... disgusting home breaker.

nigeriafarmer:
just change that your mentality it is very wrong my sister