My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) - Religion - Nairaland
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| My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by ColdHardTruth: 12:16am On Sep 04, 2016 |
[size=14pt](Please note that I will not reveal my name for safety purpose).[/size] was born in a middle-class Pakistani family, and thus I was brought up in a very religiously (Sunni Muslim) strict manner. As the eldest son, my mother paid a lot of attention to me. She used to tell me about the stories and Miracles of Prophet Mohammed and Qu'ran, she told me that I was very lucky to have been born into a Muslim family. I was happy knowing that Allah cared so much about me and that I will go to heaven when I die. As a curios child, I once asked my mother that "What was Allah doing before he made the universe? I mean he is always there and has no beginning, right?" to which my mother replied "Don't even think about stuff like that ever again". I was fine with that. If I do exactly what the Qu'ran and Prophet Mohammed said I was going to get rewarded with Heaven and who wouldn't want that? And since everybody in my family considered me a genius they had a lot of expectations from me and so I was sent to a local Primary school at the age of 4. At age 12 (after I was done with 8th Grade), I was sent to a Madrrasah to memorize Qu'ran. Those unfortunately were the worst day of my life. At first I was very excited about this, because I was told that If I memorize Qu'ran, Prophet Mohammed will personally welcome me to heaven (if that makes any sense?). First few days were good, but for some unknown reason the Qari (Imam or w/e you want to call him) hated me. After a couple of weeks he started beating (well not just me other students as well) me no reason at all and each day it got worse, I convinced myself to believe that he was probably doing this so I don't make any mistakes (which I rarely ever made) because if I do, Allah will send me to Hell. One day I was sick but was I was not allowed to be absent from Madrassah so I went there anyway, but couldn't memorize the work I was given. When it was my turn to recite the Qur'an, I told the Imam that I didn't memorize it and apologized. He didn't say anything, instead he picked up the water hose and lashed me around 20-25 with it( I was begging that sadistic monster to stop, but he didn't), then he smashed my head the desk (which caused two of my teeth to break). When I went home that day and told my parents about it, they said "Well, you must have done something wrong, you are not supposed make mistakes when it comes to Qur'an. We'll still talk to Imam-Sahib tomorrow". That was it. I was infuriated, I mean how could an All-Merciful Allah allows such severe punishment of such small mistakes (not even a mistake since I admitted that I didn't memorize the work and even apologized)? That was when I started to have doubts about Islam. The next day I told my parents that I don't want to go to Madrassah and I wanted to continue my studies. Of course, my parents protested a lot but I had already made up my mind and so they had no choice but to accept my decision (though they didn't talk to me for a whole month after that). I started High School and became a good Muslim again, I met a guy in school (he was an Ahmadiya. I was told that I should never talk to him) and we became good friend. It was when the suicide bombing started in Pakistan and my friend died in one of them. What was worse that my parents actually supported the "Jihadits" although they did condemned the bombing in their own Muslim countries. They said that these Jihadits should wipe out America. I was left speechless, I mean how could my parents even think of such inhuman thing? And how could any religion even allow anything like this? That was when I started critically analyzing Islam, I spent my entire free time reading various Islamic books and Tafseer of Qur'an (I didn't have internet or even a PC for that matter, so I used to spend all my time reading various books). And guess what? Rather than clearing my doubts that I previously had, it made things worse. I begged Allah to show me the true path, and a tiny sign so I could believe him. But nothing happened (useless God I know). I was mess those days my grades started to drop to point where I actually failed in two subjects, so to fix all f this I decided to never think about it ever again and started my studies again. 2 years ago I finally got a Laptop and an internet connection (through the money I got from scholarship and tuition's). Life became normal once again, although the "religion-thought" did hit me from time to time. 6 months ago, I saw this anti-Islamic post on Facebook and I got angry at the guys who were posting hateful comments towards Mohammed, I told them that they were sick bleeps and will eventually rot in hell to which one of them replied "If you're telling me that I will go to hell for asking logical question, then I'm fine with that". I told him to read Qu'ran to get his answers as it was the perfect book and he replied "I'm sure you've already read it, are you certain that it's perfect?" and I froze. I immediately logged out of Facebook (and haven't used it since that day) opened YouTube (Using a proxy server of course. You'll be surprised to hear that it's still blocked) and started watching Muslim owns Christians/Hindus/Atheist (funny, right?), Zakir Naik destroys Atheism (I'm still surprised by the fact that I actually used to like this guy) and Christian converts to Islam videos. Of course, I was desperate and I would believe anything that could justify Islam and Qur'anic Miracles. One day I was surfing YouTube and accidentally (best accidental mistake of my life) opened a video of Richard Dawkins and that was when everything changed. And after that I started watching Sam Harris/Hitch/Dennet/Richard Carrie/Krauss/Shelly Kagan and other intellectual Titans. I felt much better and felt more intelligent than ever so I kept doing research for the next 3-4 months. So, last month I finally got rid of Islam for good. I can't describe how good I felt doing when I left Islam, I've never once in my life felt so free, so alive and much happier. I felt like I had gotten rid of some huge burden off my shoulder. Of course I didn't tell anyone, because you know I didn't wanted to die, especially when there is no Afterlife. But around 15 days ago my aunt and my cousin came to visit us, he told me that he wanted to use Facebook, so I gave him my Laptop and went to by stuff for them. I don't know why but he actually searched my history (I think he wanted to check whether I watch any porn or not?). Unfortunately, my history was full of "Anti-Religion" content, he showed this to my mom and went to tell everybody about it. I already knew what was gonna happen. Suddenly everybody was standing around me like I was some sacrificial lamb (in a way yes I was). They asked me what is the meaning of this and I told them that I could not believe anymore and they all started yelling at me. Suddenly, my Uncle grabbed my collar and told me that I was worthy of being shot in the head. For some reason I was incredibly calm at that time, so I said that "That's just about the only thing I can expect from someone who could not even pass 7th Grade" (stupid of me I know). It infuriated him even more, he pushed me back and said "*Amir you might as well behead him if he's going to bring such shame to the family". I didn't say anything and kept quite, after a while they all left. My parents didn't talk to me for a whole week, but things are starting to get normal again especially after my mother asked the reason of me taking such step and after I asked her a couple of questions to which she didn't replied (obviously she had no answer) and haven't brought up this subject since. Although my relationship with my family is bleeped, I feel more relaxed now. I still can't say that there is no God as there are many unexplained things in this universe, so in a sense I'm an agnostic. But I can say one thing for a sure that God of Abraham is the worst fictional deity ever. I don't hate Islam or Muslims, and I know most of them are peaceful, but it's the Radical that kill and the peaceful maturity doesn't matter. In fact it's actually frightening when these so called "peaceful" people support the Radicals. It's time we throw the religion in the garbage where it actually belongs. I do not ever want to see a country that where they have Sharia. We need to stop this cult named Islam from spreading, otherwise it'll be too late. *Fake name So that is my story folks, sorry that it's too long but I wanted to share my experience with anyone going through the same phase. Thanks for taking the time to read it. P.S: Ignore any grammatical errors. My English is not perfect, but I am always improving it. N.B this monicker is not the author of this story, he's just spreading the word 6 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by ladyF(f): 12:18am On Sep 04, 2016 |
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| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by EyeHateGod: 12:40am On Sep 04, 2016 |
ladyF:Go back to romance section 3 Likes |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by EyeHateGod: 12:42am On Sep 04, 2016 |
@op take out those pic tank me later  |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by annunaki2(m): 9:31am On Sep 04, 2016 |
All it takes for a good person to renounce Islam is to objectively study the quoran and the sunnah of mohammed. 1 Like |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by ColdHardTruth: 5:24pm On Sep 04, 2016 |
EyeHateGod: Done that bro, thanks |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by ColdHardTruth: 1:59pm On Sep 18, 2016 |
EyeHateGod: I'm a little curious though would I have been banned? |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by annunaki2(m): 2:35pm On Sep 18, 2016 |
ColdHardTruth: If it was your personal picture, it could expose your identity and you know what fundermentalist muslims can do to people who expose Islam. |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by hopefulLandlord: 4:46pm On Sep 23, 2016 |
bump |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by annunaki2(m): 7:27am On Sep 24, 2016 |
I would rather be an atheist than a Satan worshipper(muslim). |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by ColdHardTruth: 4:33pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
annunaki2: Wow! |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by johnydon22(m): 6:12pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
annunaki2: I'm wondering if you'd say this if the person above deconverted from Christianity, i'm really thinking. Seriously would you? Hypocrites. 2 Likes |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by Sheenor: 6:32pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
annunaki2: |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by butterfly88(m): 8:00pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
johnydon22:indubitably not,he'd be like He was never a christian,,he was never guided by the holy spirit...this here is the peak of hypocrisy |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by butterfly88(m): 8:03pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
johnydon22:indubitably not,he'd be like He was never a christian,,he was never guided by the holy spirit...this here is the peak of hypocrisy |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by johnydon22(m): 8:11pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
butterfly88: exactly |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by ColdHardTruth: 5:50pm On Oct 13, 2016 |
butterfly88: on point |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by hopefulLandlord: 9:37am On Dec 15, 2016 |
hmmmmmmm |
| Re: My Journey To Atheism (A Story Of An Ex Muslim) by hopefulLandlord: 11:25am On Dec 15, 2016 |
religion of peace  |
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