₦airaland Forum

I don't usually respond to issues like this. I'm only doing this to help you have a better understanding of marriage. It's easy to criticize President Buhari on this issue but wisdom should tell you that he was right. Now, I'm not writing this to only defend the President but to state the obvious fact we all must know. We must choose to understand how marriage works. A man needs wisdom to keep his home else he loses control. In Nigeria and like the tradition of most places in the world, it's the man that goes to pay dowries for the woman he wants to marry. He does that and takes the woman home. By that action, the wife automatically falls under the man's authority who paid dowries to her parents. That's on one part. We can also look at it from the account of creation as recorded in Genesis. Briefly, God created everything and Adam and see that everything was good. For God to say everything was good means it was really good even without the woman. Adam was alone in the Garden of Eden and God see that it was not good for the man to be alone; He created Eve to be a companion and help meet for the man. Adam was alone but not lonely – those are two different words. God created Eve from Adam. First, it was only Adam then came Eve through him – that automatically places the woman under the man. That’s not all; the Bible describes the woman as a weaker vessel. That again places the man above the woman.

Why any sane woman should wants to exert strength at the same level with a man? Why any sane woman should not be submissive to the husband and stay where the husband wants her to be? In marriage, one man can decide to define boundaries for the wife while the other man can decide not to and let the woman have unlimited boundaries even to the point of controlling the man – it’s his decision; whether he knows or understands what he is doing, it’s his decision. Every married woman knows the level of authority the husband has over the family and also know her boundaries. It shouldn’t be because majority of people think same way then they are right. No! The man holds the right or authority to define what wavelength those under his roof must operate within. You go beyond that, you get into trouble. You go beyond that, you become rebellious. You stay there, you stay in peace. You stay there, you stay in happiness. If a man decides to give his wife unlimited boundaries, that’s his business; such decision is subjective and shouldn’t be generalized. Knowingly and unknowingly, the man defines the boundaries his wife operates.

The wife is supposed to present her concerns to the husband as a suggestion or an option and not compel him to her biddings. Depending on what the wife needs to do, she needs to seek permission from the husband and not act the way she wishes. If your husband becomes hurt by your actions, you bear the pain as a stupid wife. A married woman is different from any other woman. Accepting marriage is accepting to come under a higher authority else stay alone and do as you wish. Even at that, when trying to act at the same level with a man, be ready for whatever befalls you since you feel you can equal yourself with the man. You shine as a woman in marriage when you obey and respect your husband. Be a companion to your husband and not an enemy.

To President Buhari and his wife, Mrs. Aisha Buhari
It doesn’t matter who the President stands before to say his wife belongs in his kitchen, sitting room and the bedroom. It’s his wife; he married her and keeps her under his roof. She accepted to fall under Buhari’s authority. The man is free to say join me in politics or stay off politics. He defines the boundaries for her. Mrs. Aisha would have seek permission from the husband before granting BBC that interview and she should have known her boundaries because just like the President has said, I’m very sure he must have told her in private that you are not a politician but my wife so stay off matters of politics. She should have suggested whatever her concerns are to the husband privately and let the man decide whether to heed or not. Well, we learn everyday but Mrs. Aisha Buhari should understand that for peace to reign in her home largely depends on her and if that doesn’t happen she’ll suffer it the most.

For this matter, #IStandWithBuhari

HIScraziness:
When your mates are out there tryna survive in this harsh economy you are here standing with an old ass nigga who doesn't and would never know of your existence!!


The money used for your education which your parents thought will by mere chance make you a better person should have been used to buy some sand to level up your compound if at all your family own one.... Glorified failure!!

samuelson06:
Hahaha You wailer. E pain you there Sure, you don't know me. If you do, you'll know I live above the economy of Nigeria.

HIScraziness:

You went further to prove me right redundant fool!!