₦airaland Forum

Good day all, this is not like any of my regular posts. Need useful and mature responses please. Thanks!

It all started in 2014 - in the first half of the year. John (not real name) met Victoria (not real name) on a social and faceless site, Nairaland.com. She had posted her number in the 'hookup section' where they got started. John never took Victoria serious at first, at least for the remaining half of the year. As at then, she stays in Kogi State and John's intention was to have an experience of an online date.

The months roll by and there was no communication between both. On John's part, it's understandable that he never wanted something serious. August same year, he left Abuja for his home state and the gap in communication broadened the more.

However, Victoria had just completed her University education and was posted down to Ekiti State, John's State of Origin. It was at this point that he 'decided' to call her and she intimated him about her NYSC posting. Immediately, well of joy surged up in John's heart and saw this as a confirmation that they were meant to be. He quickly bridged the gap and restored all communication - calling her more than 3 times a day.

[Fast forward] Victoria was out of camp and John was to pick her up at a particular location in the state capital. She was new to the state, hence, knew nowhere. He quickly lodged her in one of his "female friend's" house, where he later secured her an apartment.

In the year 2015, John travelled to Lagos and the communication was never lost again. They have this great affection for each other that the 'barrier' between them seem so insignificant to John. Late 2015, Victoria told John her mum desires to see him. He went to Kogi and spent a week there. She (Vic's mum) was so cheerful and full of life. She welcomed John with open arms. He had since then met other members of Vic's family except the eldest, whom he speaks with on phone. They love him and they never hid it.

Trouble started with John when in May 2015, during the burial ceremony of his paternal grandmother, his mum told him he can't marry Vic because of her size (almost 3x John). She gave several reasons like sudden death caused by hypertension among others. Greater trouble dawned on him when the barrier he never considered became a stumbling block. Victoria has a 2+ year old daughter.

John's parents had since January 2016 been capitalizing on that issue maintaining that he can't marry an 'after one'. But all of these never moved John. He was resolute on his decision. Of recent, his dad called him that if he is bent on marrying Vic, he (John's dad) is not ready to sign any document in favour of that.




My friend needs your candid advice. He's 28 and feels he is old enough to take vital decisions for himself. What should he do? Is it a crime marrying an 'after one'?



Help a bro, help a friend!

*modified*

Please mods, a friend and bro needs urgent advice. Kindly push to FP for a wider audience...

Lalasticlala,
Fynestboi,
Mynd44,
OAMJ,
Seun

If person like John no marry her na me wan marry her?

Bros this is Africa! Where you merge both families as a result of marriage.You cant operate in isolation in as much as you need the blessings of your parents. For the fact you are 28rs old does not mean you have seen half of what they have experienced in life...Don leave your parents without a blessing!

Did he know that Victoria already had a daughter b4 asking her out??

Warhawk:
Did he know that Victoria already had a daughter b4 asking her out??

Yes

Akell:
Yes

then he should marry her!!

She can work on her weight that's not impossible but abandon someone because a parent objects on health grounds? No! And he suddenly sees the objection of the daughter. Is he a man of a mouse? I feel perhaps he does not really love her.