Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... - Family (2)

Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... - Family (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum › Nairaland General › Family › Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... (3192 Views)

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by MrMoRitz(op): 8:13pm On Dec 27, 2016

Lol...wow, u make me laugh...well u are entitled to your own opinion..properties?no...its not on my mind,i just want peace and then i fly back to my son and wife...is that too difficult to ask for?..and i never left my parents behind, instead i went in search of greener pastures, instead of to be dependent on my parents...why cant he do same?...i initially wanted to take him back with me,but with this behaviour and fights over nothing,i dont think i can for now...i repeat,i gave him everything even while i was away from home for years...i talked with my late dad and mum at least 3times weekly...

Pidgin2:
After 8 years of staying abroad and leaving your parents behind, you are now back to claim property abi? Your brother has been eating akpu and garri while you have been eating burger, if you attempt to fight him you will be beaten black and blue, you might not be well enough to return abroad so be wise and respect yourself

2 Likes

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by eyinjuege: 8:15pm On Dec 27, 2016*

Whether abroad or not, OP is entitled to at least an equal share of his parent's property unless otherwise specified in a will by the deceased.
Whether he had to travel abroad, or relocate to Lagos while his siblings are in the village with their father is of no importance while trying to share inheritance.
How many of us still live with our parents after school, and getting a job?
Because we don't live physically with them doesn't mean we don't talk to them, or remember them by sending some token to them when we can.
That doesn't even mean those in the village/same town with them are pulling their weight.

4 Likes

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by EfemenaXY: 8:28pm On Dec 27, 2016

eyinjuege:
Whether abroad or not, OP is entitled to at least an equal share of his parent's property unless otherwise specified in a will by the deceased.
Whether he had to travel abroad, or relocate to Lagos while his siblings are in the village with their father is of no importance while trying to share inheritance.
How many of us still live with our parents after school, and getting a job?
Because we don't live physically with them doesn't mean we don't talk to them, or remember them by sending some token to them when we can.
That doesn't even mean does in the village/same town with them are pulling their weight.

In theory yes. Otherwise, I doubt anyone having to do hard graft in Naija will see it that way. His brother probably feels he was left to cater for their parents and now their father is no more, the older brother despite his "wealth" abroad, has returned to take the little they have left to survive with.

Once you travel abroad, the perception is that you've made it / are making it even if that isn't the case. Now I know that isn't right but it is what it is. Besides @op has been showing off and his actions and words are far from subtle.

The more I read his story, the more I emphasise with his younger brother, especially as @op feels he's better than him.

Food for thought: Even if the property are shared equally amongst them, what stops the younger brother from taking over @op's share (on the pretext that he's helping @op look after them) once he returns abroad?

1 Like

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by MrMoRitz(op): 8:29pm On Dec 27, 2016

God bless you for saying what i thought abt too..

Most people leave their parents right after university or while in the university

so just because u live apart from your family and then you visit, your younger brother should be acting this way? So for example, u live in lagos or abuja and visit home with all d gifts and still one black sheep is not satisfied and is hell bent on making your stay miserable?

eyinjuege:
Whether abroad or not, OP is entitled to at least an equal share of his parent's property unless otherwise specified in a will by the deceased.
Whether he had to travel abroad, or relocate to Lagos while his siblings are in the village with their father is of no importance while trying to share inheritance.
How many of us still live with our parents after school, and getting a job?
Because we don't live physically with them doesn't mean we don't talk to them, or remember them by sending some token to them when we can.
That doesn't even mean does in the village/same town with them are pulling their weight.

1 Like

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by EfemenaXY: 8:34pm On Dec 27, 2016

MrMoRitz:
God bless you for saying what i thought abt too..

Most people leave their parents right after university or while in the university

so just because u live apart from your family and then you visit, your younger brother should be acting this way? So for example, u live in lagos or abuja and visit home with all d gifts and still one black sheep is not satisfied and is hell bent on making your stay miserable?

You better confess why you think your brother is "hell bent on making your stay a misery"

what did you do to him?? Why are you trying so hard to bribe him with gifts??

1 Like

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by cococandy(f): 8:40pm On Dec 27, 2016

So if you kill yourself because of your brother or kill him and end up in prison, what do you want your wife and two month old baby to do?

Did you even consider them before thinking such thoughts?

Don't let the devil steal your joy.

3 Likes

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by Nobody: 8:48pm On Dec 27, 2016

MrMoRitz:
God bless you for saying what i thought abt too..

Most people leave their parents right after university or while in the university

so just because u live apart from your family and then you visit, your younger brother should be acting this way? So for example, u live in lagos or abuja and visit home with all d gifts and still one black sheep is not satisfied and is hell bent on making your stay miserable?

Stop calling him a black sheep, it seems like you are very harsh, you probably make him feel worthless

1 Like

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by Richy4(m): 9:21pm On Dec 27, 2016

EfemenaXY:
You better confess why you think your brother is "hell bent on making your stay a misery"

what did you do to him?? Why are you trying so hard to bribe him with gifts??

Trust me he does not owe you any kind of explanation what so ever......I have just been reading how you have been going on and on causing him more grief...If you do not trust him and his stories, the best you can do is scroll and pass it..

Everyone is entitled to share their story however way they deemed fit....You don't need detail of what was going on in their family....It is not mandatory for him to share it...

7 Likes

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by drmikeadams(m): 9:23pm On Dec 27, 2016

..a family widout a black sheep na jonzing family... grin

blacxk sheeps can be managed...

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by MrMoRitz(op): 9:24pm On Dec 27, 2016

Yea, i know i might be wrong calling him that name, but if u see my brother acting up over nothing, u probably would have a rethink...

Pidgin2:
Stop calling him a black sheep, it seems like you are very harsh, you probably make him feel worthless

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by Nobody: 9:35pm On Dec 27, 2016

MrMoRitz:
Yea, i know i might be wrong calling him that name, but if u see my brother acting up over nothing, u probably would have a rethink...

Only a mad person acts over nothing, if your brother is sane then there is definitely a reason why he is acting that way. Try to find out what his problem is by studying him. How old is he and why does he want to physically fight you?, maybe he's on drugs.

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by Nobody: 9:37pm On Dec 27, 2016

MrMoRitz:
Right now, its either i kill myself or this stupid bastrd of a brother i have.i have been away from Nigeria since 2008 and i just got back.i actually came back to Nigeria for the funeral of dad and i have been around ever since trying to keep my mum and brother ok.meanwhile my wife and i just had a son 2 months before i lost my dad so i made a tough decision of leaving them overseas and flying down to Nigeria to observe all burial rites as his first son and because i missed him so much,i couldnt bear the fact that he would be buried without me seeing 1 last time.long story short,after all my late dad's family bullsh^ts during and after my dad's passing away, i have an immediate younger brother(infact my only brother, we are just 2) who behaves so stupid i cannot even imagine i have an only brother like him.He wants to fight me every minute since i have been in Nigeria.i have done everything for him but nothing seems enough.i even have to force myself to stay away from the house to avoid a full blown war with him.I am scared i might kill him, or i will kill myself because all the stress im passing through right now is too much.Left for me, i am this quiet and peace loving happy guy, enjoying my stay in the Nigeria after a long time, while having to deal with my father's death, younger brother's stupid behaviour etc
I am seriously considering flying back to my base oversea and be with my wife and son and totally forget abt Nigeria...every one make me feel hurt xcept my mum

Right now, he is even threatening my mum in the living room and yelling out, calling my name to come out from my room and fight him if i can
Note that i had only just come back from lagos today after a couple of weeks because of this same behaviour...i had to be in hotels or squating with friends whenever he behaves like this...on this trip today, i had to force myself to come down to be with my mum for the holidays no matter how he will behave while i am home, but behold he starts again...
My mum is helpless too, she doesnt want to arrest him or do anything abt his insults to us...she justs tells me to tolerate and its getting really out of hand...i swear...
I DONT WANNA HURT HIM BUT HE KEEPS GETTING WORSE WITH THE INSULTS
i heard this is exactly how he behaved too while my late dad was alive and while i was overseas...no wonder my dad passed away (wondering)
Pls help me nairalanders...dont really know what to do

I patiently read through.
But you never stated what he did....?
U only said he acts stupidly....
Please, to what does he react..?
Does he want to get married..?

1 Like

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by ogawisdom(m): 10:09pm On Dec 27, 2016

Terryindeed:
How do you know he didn't send him some dollar? How do you know he's high on weed? How do you know that he's jobless? How did you know that he's lazy? And he can't be happy? Nigga please stop saying what you don't know, simply because his elder bro came here to make it public don't mean you should criticize his brother, every story has two sides. That's not fair . I thought your name is ogawisdom? Why not use some wisdom?

Dnt be an idiot these are presumption goat

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by armyofone(m): 11:13pm On Dec 27, 2016

The property is the problem then. Can you leave your father's properties to him and your mom?
You are oversea and as such may not need those properties anyway. I think he doesn't want you to share in it believing that you are overseas and "doing well"
Just tell him straight brother if you are trying to fight me thinking I'm here for dad's stuff, hey you can have it all. Just make sure mom is secured.

MrMoRitz:
I am not been economical with the truth...i just said it as it is...and between,even if there was any problem with properties, which wouldnt even happen as i wont even cheat him out of it as we jointly own them and like seriously,i dont even think of the properties aspect, was he thinking he is d only child all d while i was outta Nigeria?i dont get it..my parents love me so much,i was born 11years after their marriage so its kinda expected...but they equally show him equal love too..i am not understanding this at all with my bro...and talking him out is out of it because d moment i take him out and we spend nice times together,it always ends up with his usual behaviour of wanting a fight with me so i stopped it

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by Terryindeed: 7:20am On Dec 28, 2016

ogawisdom:
Dnt be an idiot these are presumption goat

These where your exact words " I kw he is angry with you for not sending him some good dollars while you were abroad." How I how you how you know you chose to call me a saying you were presuming. Yeah am a goat ( greatest of all time), but you? Stupidity is telling on your forehead, you are so dumb that you presume everything and come here to say trash instead of you to think very well and get your fucking story right. Oga wisdom? Oboy change your name to smallboy without sense. Devil will punish you for the rest of your life if you abuse me again. Animal, ogawisdom indeed... werey

1 Like

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by Richy4(m): 8:32am On Dec 28, 2016

MrMoRitz:
I will try one more time to be friendly with him,take him out,and then find out from him what d problem really is

Another matured move if you ask me....But hey bro, this is just between me and you as a bro on NL Okay..... I know you are grounded with fowl and colorful languages...and I have seen some of your write ups on this thread...keep it at the barest minimum....any word or language that can push one's button... that is condescending... should not be out while having the talks....If you cannot handle or choose your words carefully please do not go for the meeting so that things will not escalate once more....You are the one that wants to make peace as the elder brother,...your own anger should not equally show even when he is trying to push your own button...Pls if you cannot handle this, do not go....I wish you the best of luck man as you make peace with your brother.....

3 Likes

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by ogawisdom(m): 8:37am On Dec 28, 2016

Terryindeed:
These where your exact words " I kw he is angry with you for not sending him some good dollars while you were abroad." How I how you how you know you chose to call me a saying you were presuming. Yeah am a goat ( greatest of all time), but you? Stupidity is telling on your forehead, you are so dumb that you presume everything and come here to say trash instead of you to think very well and get your fucking story right. Oga wisdom? Oboy change your name to smallboy without sense. Devil will punish you for the rest of your life if you abuse me again. Animal, ogawisdom indeed... werey

Who is this pathological frustrated fool, better go hang urself if u r dt useless. I am entitled to my opinion n I never referred to u so stay off my mention imbecil.e

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by Terryindeed: 9:18am On Dec 28, 2016

ogawisdom:
Who is this pathological frustrated fool, better go hang urself if u r dt useless. I am entitled to my opinion n I never referred to u so stay off my mention imbecil.e

Ogawisdom indeed. Dead brain. Keep up your good work.

1 Like

Re: Pls Advice Urgently Nairalanders... by Gpopsicle(m): 4:07pm On Dec 28, 2016

MrMoRitz:
Right now, its either i kill myself or this stupid bastrd of a brother i have.i have been away from Nigeria since 2008 and i just got back.i actually came back to Nigeria for the funeral of dad and i have been around ever since trying to keep my mum and brother ok.meanwhile my wife and i just had a son 2 months before i lost my dad so i made a tough decision of leaving them overseas and flying down to Nigeria to observe all burial rites as his first son and because i missed him so much,i couldnt bear the fact that he would be buried without me seeing 1 last time.long story short,after all my late dad's family bullsh^ts during and after my dad's passing away, i have an immediate younger brother(infact my only brother, we are just 2) who behaves so stupid i cannot even imagine i have an only brother like him.He wants to fight me every minute since i have been in Nigeria.i have done everything for him but nothing seems enough.i even have to force myself to stay away from the house to avoid a full blown war with him.I am scared i might kill him, or i will kill myself because all the stress im passing through right now is too much.Left for me, i am this quiet and peace loving happy guy, enjoying my stay in the Nigeria after a long time, while having to deal with my father's death, younger brother's stupid behaviour etc
I am seriously considering flying back to my base oversea and be with my wife and son and totally forget abt Nigeria...every one make me feel hurt xcept my mum

Right now, he is even threatening my mum in the living room and yelling out, calling my name to come out from my room and fight him if i can
Note that i had only just come back from lagos today after a couple of weeks because of this same behaviour...i had to be in hotels or squating with friends whenever he behaves like this...on this trip today, i had to force myself to come down to be with my mum for the holidays no matter how he will behave while i am home, but behold he starts again...
My mum is helpless too, she doesnt want to arrest him or do anything abt his insults to us...she justs tells me to tolerate and its getting really out of hand...i swear...
I DONT WANNA HURT HIM BUT HE KEEPS GETTING WORSE WITH THE INSULTS
i heard this is exactly how he behaved too while my late dad was alive and while i was overseas...no wonder my dad passed away (wondering)
Pls help me nairalanders...dont really know what to do

@op,my advise based on experience.. get him locked up and after staying behind bars he will come back to his senses.it worked for my uncle and now he s a changed man...

1 2 Reply

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