Blessed11:


Hi Naira Land!


I need u guys to help me out here. I'm confused about my fiancé so maybe you guys can help see clearly?

I met my fiancé at a wedding in Nigeria. He was the best man I was the maid of honor. We are both igbo but I am American born & raised.

After we met, we exchanged numbers. And he chatted me as I flew back to the States up until today 10 months later. We have talked everyday, 3x a day.

Two weeks after the wedding he started saying he loves me. And I was abit thrown off by it. Soon within the first month he mentioned marriage. This threw me off, but enticed me as I want to marry being in my 30s.

In one of our earliest convos, he mentioned buying us a house since Im now his responsibility but he will leave it for me and come to visit. Since hes not sure he likes yankee. This unfuriated me & I ignored him for 2 days. What kind of marriage would that be? He said he was just joking n I forgave him.

So fast forward 7 months later... he has stated his intention to marry me to my uncle after coming to see me in Lagos on a visit I made.

We did the engagement ceremony in my uncle house. I met his whole family: Mom, Sister, Brother, his Boss... everyone knows about me. And chats me everyday. My picture has been on his dp the whole 9 months. He sent texts showing me off... and posted my pics on fb. He contacted my uncle to do the introduction and spoke to my Dad & Mom. He calls me his soulmate... and says he will have a broken heart if I leave him.

So here are the problems: He lied about his age. Told me he is 32 (I am 32) but I found out thru his ex he is 29. I confronted him and took 5 months and silly made up stories before he came clean that he is indeed 29. I even called his Mom to verify. He told me his Mom was lying! But today he confesses he is 29.

Next issue: when I went to Lagos to see him, I searched his phone. Wrong I know! But I saw three texts that confused me: one was him asking his friend to save his ex gf pics of him and her and one of her awards. Two was him asking his friend to send him money to complete d mission (him propising to me) in lagos as he is making road for men. The third was him flirting with one girl.

Next issue: he keeps mentioning marriage but doesnt ask where we will live, wat he will do for living here.. or any real plans. Im the one making all d plans.

The last issue: we got into an argument about some of the texts I saw on my lagos visit. One of his friends called him to ask him why we are fighting. He told him a very different story! That we are fighting because I want him to live in America, but he cant live there since he has his job in ph. Mind you all he does in naija is work as transport manager and an errand boy for one company.

He told his friend that he wants to just be visiting me instead. I was so confused because I was getting ready to file for him, choosing a place for us to live, and looking into job sectors and schools for him... we talked about making up a good home and picking out a house.

So I called him to pretend thats what I want so I can see what he really wants...And he agreed! Saying that I can live in America and him in naija. And He said I can wait to have kids later... like age 40....

Im so confused. Ive done secret investigations and everyone knows me as the wife to be. Like everyone!! He flaunts my pics everywhere... his mom knows me his boss everyyyone!!

So why does something feel off

Igbos:
Hmmm.. I smell a scam.

IN MY OPINION.
You are the Golden Goose
But not the only Goose.

Boboforthegirls:
U didn't do summary in school? Ur Bobo is a lier

Blessed11:


Why do you say?

Skullomania:
This is how to get the fastest visa out of this recession. Another format for yahoo guys.

Blessed11:


Hi Naira Land!
Hi Naira Land!

So I need to guys to help me out here. I'm confused about my relationship, so maybe you guys can help see clearly?

I met my fiancé at a wedding in Nigeria. He was the best man I was the maid of honor. We are both igbo but I am American born & raised.

After the wedding we exchanged numbers. And he chatted me as I flew back to the States up until today 10 months later. We have talked everyday, 3x a day.

Two weeks after the wedding he started saying he loves me. And I was abit thrown off by it. Soon within the first month he mentioned marriage. This threw me off, but enticed me as I want to marry being in my 30s.

In one of our earliest convos, he mentioned buying us a house since Im now his responsibility but he will leave it for me and come to visit. Since hes not sure he likes yankee. This unfuriated me & I ignored him for 2 days. What kind of marriage would that be? He said he was just joking n I forgave him.

So fast forward 7 months later... he has stated his intention to marry me to my uncle after coming to see me in Lagos on a visit I made.

We did the wine engagement ceremony in my uncle house. I met his whole family: Mom, Sister, Brother, his Boss... everyone knows about me. And chats me everyday. My picture has been on his dp the whole 9 months. He sent texts showing me off... and posted my pics on fb. He contacted my uncle to do the introduction and spoke to my Dad & Mom. He calls me his soulmate... and says he will have a broken heart if I leave him.

So here are the problems: He lied about his age. Told me he is 32 (I am 32) but I found out thru his ex he is 29. I confronted him and took 5 months and silly made up stories before he came clean that he is indeed 29. I even called his Mom to verify. He told me his Mom was lying! But today he confesses he is 29.

Next issue: when I went to Lagos to see him, I searched his phone. Wrong I know! But I saw three texts that confused me: one was him asking his friend to save his ex gf pics of him and her and one of her awards. Two was him asking his friend to send him money to complete d mission in lagos as he is making road for men. The third was him flirting with one girl.

Next issue: he keeps mentioning marriage but doesnt ask where we will live, wat he will do for living here.. or any real plans. Im the one making all d plans.

The last issue: we got into an argument about some of the texts I saw on my lagos visit. One of his friends called him to ask him why we are fighting. He told him a very different story! That we are fighting because I want him to live in America, but he cant live there since he has his job in ph. Mind you all he has no job he is an errand boy and does construction gigs. He told his friend that he wants to just be visiting me instead. I was so confused because I was getting ready to file for him, choosing a place for us to live, and looking into job sectors and schools for him!

So I called him to pretend thats what I want. And he agreed! Saying that I can live in America and him in Nigeria for awhile and I can have babies later like 40 he said.

Naira Landers!! Am I missing something? Or does everything seems okay and I'm overthinking this guy? Please be honest and neutral!!!!
So I need to guys to help me out here. I'm confused about my relationship, so maybe you guys can help see clearly?

I met my fiancé at a wedding in Nigeria. He was the best man I was the maid of honor. We are both igbo but I am American born & raised.

After the wedding we exchanged numbers. And he chatted me as I flew back to the States up until today 10 months later. We have talked everyday, 3x a day.

Two weeks after the wedding he started saying he loves me. And I was abit thrown off by it. Soon within the first month he mentioned marriage. This threw me off, but enticed me as I want to marry being in my 30s.

In one of our earliest convos, he mentioned buying us a house since Im now his responsibility but he will leave it for me and come to visit. Since hes not sure he likes yankee. This unfuriated me & I ignored him for 2 days. What kind of marriage would that be? He said he was just joking n I forgave him.

So fast forward 7 months later... he has stated his intention to marry me to my uncle after coming to see me in Lagos on a visit I made.

We did the wine engagement ceremony in my uncle house. I met his whole family: Mom, Sister, Brother, his Boss... everyone knows about me. And chats me everyday. My picture has been on his dp the whole 9 months. He sent texts showing me off... and posted my pics on fb. He contacted my uncle to do the introduction and spoke to my Dad & Mom. He calls me his soulmate... and says he will have a broken heart if I leave him.

So here are the problems: He lied about his age. Told me he is 32 (I am 32) but I found out thru his ex he is 29. I confronted him and took 5 months and silly made up stories before he came clean that he is indeed 29. I even called his Mom to verify. He told me his Mom was lying! But today he confesses he is 29.

Next issue: when I went to Lagos to see him, I searched his phone. Wrong I know! But I saw three texts that confused me: one was him asking his friend to save his ex gf pics of him and her and one of her awards. Two was him asking his friend to send him money to complete d mission in lagos as he is making road for men. The third was him flirting with one girl.

Next issue: he keeps mentioning marriage but doesnt ask where we will live, wat he will do for living here.. or any real plans. Im the one making all d plans.

The last issue: we got into an argument about some of the texts I saw on my lagos visit. One of his friends called him to ask him why we are fighting. He told him a very different story! That we are fighting because I want him to live in America, but he cant live there since he has his job in ph. Mind you all he has no job he is an errand boy and does construction gigs. He told his friend that he wants to just be visiting me instead. I was so confused because I was getting ready to file for him, choosing a place for us to live, and looking into job sectors and schools for him!

So I called him to pretend thats what I want. And he agreed! Saying that I can live in America and him in Nigeria for awhile and I can have babies later like 40 he said.

Naira Landers!! Am I missing something? Or does everything seems okay and I'm overthinking this guy? Please be honest and neutral!!!!

Blessed11:


But he mentioned me to his elders n everyone lnew about me i wasnt hidden

Skullomania:


What happens when after marriage, he gets his papers complete to live in America and then divorce u. Would u run to his elders and scream blue murder after he has sealed their mouth with dollars?
And also for the fact u both are igbos, u are in a better position to know how far an igbo man will go for the sake of greener pasture.
My dear, no young man in this country will prefer to live here rather than travel out. If any guy tell u that, then u just been seen as a potential mumu

sunshyne20:
@blessed11 sometimes NL can be confusing, as so many people give advice based on their perspective, ideology, experiences & characters.
He may have lied, yes!!! But have thought of the fact that he is being intimidated by your success, and doing all he can to measure up?
Am sure he didn't know you were US based when you guys met.

I think, make him feel comfortable, make him know you love him for who he is and believe in his future.

Not all men are savages..
About his ex pic, I think you even have yours, but if you don't, it's Because you decided to let it go.
About living in Nigeria, I feel he said that so you wouldn't think he is in for the visa.
About the age, I have a friend 27 marrying a girl 32 and he is so proud of it, that we(his friends) have not say.

Dont just conclude, weigh your choices. It may be true love.

Blessed 11:
............................him asking his friend to send him money to compete d mission (him proposing to me) in Lagos as he is making road for men ...........

Blessed11:










............. So I called him to pretend thats what I want. And he agreed! Saying that I can live in America and him in Nigeria for awhile and I can have babies later like 40 he said.

So here are the problems: He lied about his age. Told me he is 32 (I am 32) but I found out thru his ex he is 29. I confronted him and took 5 months and silly made up stories before he came clean that he is indeed 29. I even called his Mom to verify. He told me his Mom was lying! But today he confesses he is 29

Blessed11:


Hi Naira Land!
Hi Naira Land!


Next issue: he keeps mentioning marriage but doesnt ask where we will live, wat he will do for living here.. or any real plans. Im the one making all d plans.

.............. Mind you all he has no job he is an errand boy.................


................. Please be honest and neutral!!!!

Blessed11:


But I asked him severally and he said theres no way he would scam me because we are both igbo and hes doing a traditional marriage with me.

Blessed11:


But I asked him severally and he said theres no way he would scam me because we are both igbo and hes doing a traditional marriage with me.

obadizena:



It's not clear to me, from ur posts, whether u're the bossy lady type. But right now u're the one doing all the planning & u enjoy doing so. What u doing now is actually laying the foundation upon which ur future lifestyle would be built.

U know ur expectations.
The question is would this guy meet up to ur expectations?
In the event that he doesn't meet up to ur expectations after marriage & divorce becomes inevitable, & u have to start all over again, (considering the fact that u don't want to marry in ur late thirties) who would be prejudiced the most? U or him.

All these are questions u have to take into consideration in getting ur priorities right when making a lifetime decision.

Benz4pimp:
Babe,if your story is true,it's very easy.dont file for him yet.Do that after your first child.This is a game I love to play.....Open your eyes,stop acting desperate all bcus u r getting older.....Your happiness dey ur hands oooooo,I know u r in lust and can't think clearly for now but shine dose eyes of urs oooo,cus when it happens,u will b the only one to cross your cross