₦airaland Forum

. I feel better now. Thanks all

He has never been there for us and Is like he will never be. The earlier I accept this, the better for us.

Here lies your answer


Move on ma. Never let anyone or anybody steal your joy

i feel your pain, its not your fault, you thought as he came back he came for good not knowing he came to destabilize things.

what i depict here is that, he wants his son and not you, that should ring alarm to you that you need a man i mean another man to fill in his gap.

inner peace!!!

@olubome123
As much as this man is a deadbeat dad, blaming him for your predicament won't help. Just be the best you can for your kid, and forget about his dad. You can't really expect a man who has never been there for you and your child, to suddenly get sense and act right.

Remember, whether a deadbeat dad or not, you should NOT try to stop him having contact with his child. Doing so will only hurt YOUR CHILD.

olubome123:
I created this acct this morning because I need to post this maybe it could make me feel better . I have an acct here which I wouldnt want to disclose. Am always in the business section.

I actually cried my life out last night. I woke up this morning and am still alive. Thought I was going to die. I had a son with my ex. But since the past 2 years, i've not heard from him. The last time was when he came back into my life, apologies, scattered the relationship I was in with someone else, and then disappear again. He talked politely with the Guy in my presence. pushed him away as if he cares for us. He went far as threatening him on phone with hurtful words without my knowledge. It was my Family that later settle the problem. The other Guy went away in tears and hurt. I couldnt help because all advice was to forgive and chose my son's father. Its so sad. When I remember all that. It hurt me over and over again. He sent him away and he was not ready to stay with us. Two years has gone. Nothing from him.
Since then, I don't want to forgive him ever again . Recently, my granny advised that I allow communication between my son and his father, but he never called, its only my son that always talk to daddy. Two weeks ago when my son was sick, I over heard him on phone telling his father that nurse gave him injection in his bombom, still he never called back to check on him till today.
Things are so difficult for me now, that I cant meet up with so many bills, yestaday my baby could not take breakfast till around 11:00am because we had nothing in the House. So I took a bold step after giving it much thought, I decided to texted him if he can help us with some money to buy some food stuff in the House, but he purposely ignore me. this is the first time in 4years I asked for his help . Am the only supper lady that worked so hard to care for my baby.
He has never been there for us and Is like he will never be. The earlier I accept this, the better for us.
So many things are going wrong in me. I so much have bitterness in my heart. I cant love anymore, I cant trust. How can I raise my son to be a good man with all these hatred, unforgivenes in me? I really failed.

Hello, can you explain what is stopping you from getting a job, even a menial one Madam?

i Feel ur pain ma'am

ur bobo is a wannabe daddy, he likes d tag and he aint ready to carry out d responsibility, dat's why he turn magician wey dey apper and disappear....

d only things dat matters now is the happiness of ur son and make sure d bitterness within you doesn't affect it...

if u wish to move on by getting another bobo, no problem buh beware of d hit and run niggas hovering around coz dey like ur spec(single mother)...

concerning ur magician bobo, he might be back stronger very soon coz he knows ur weakness now which is financial prob...pls, when he comes back, be mindful of his tongue, dere type can lie o, so watch out...


lastly, both parents taking care of a child can be a little bit difficult at times not to talk of a single mother, dat why u nid the creator to help, jux give him a call...

Can you not please think there's a baby daddy somewhere?

Your son should be your priority
Don't worry about a man now
Things will fall in place
Firstly, give yourself the financial freedom

Haa! O ma se o...Pele okomi. That's what my Granny would say. When one could practically imagine the other's pain and just wanna give them a hug...that's how I feel right now.

Please, lighten your heart. Live for your son. Don't even think of the moffo again...pretend he's not there. In fact, change your number...he's an azzhole. I wish you didn't listen to them when they said you should choose him, recycled relationships where the exes couldn't work initially fail 9 times out of 10. Biko, lighten your heart, re strategize on how to provide the needs of your child. It is well darling...may God shine some light your way. This bad wind will pass sooner than you expect. Pele baby.

Don't even think about getting another man until you put your baby daddy in the rightful position.

He will come for the next. Even when he doesn't bite the next time he comes, just a little care and sweet words from him will leave you helpless again.

I know your type VERY WELL.


Continue to care and show love to your baby, and be hopeful that some day, your baby daddy will come around with a ring as a changed man.

A lesson to the slay queens of today. One day you would be a baby mama and then your brain would be restored to factory settings.
Madam op, get a job, get a life. Move on. Find love.

Such an irresponsible father!, tomorrow he'll say he has a son. Op, get a job and put him in his place, you don't need such men in your life. Sorry!.

Thanks @All..
@pidging, I have something doing.
@acidosis. You're right. And I have done that already. No body's emotion Is to be played with and I regretted that.

I understood very well. How can I love a man who has constantly cause me Pain all because I Ioved him? I accepted him then because I was looking like the only harden unforgiving person on earth. I did all that for my son not because I love to.
Why I felt so much Pain last night was: I felt I made a fool of myself by sending him a txt. I felt so humiliating

You were in a difficult place, no big deal... Call it a life experience, and hopefully you've learned from it.

olubome123:
Thanks @All..
@pidging, I have something doing.
@acidosis. You're right. And I have done that already. No body's emotion Is to be played with and I regretted that.

I understood very well. How can I love a man who has constantly cause me Pain all because I Ioved him? I accepted him then because I was looking like the only harden unforgiving person on earth. I did all that for my son not because I love to.
Why I felt so much Pain last night was: I felt I made a fool of myself by sending him a txt. I felt so humiliating

Sorry dear I know how it feels my step brother abandoned his family 4 kids and the wife , the 4th child was born recently he didn't come to hospital or even the naming ceremony my mother had to go and mind you she's not my steps mother. Right now forget about the baby daddy because he's not useful you need to take care of yourself get a job, work hard and keep hustling things will change as long as you don't give up. One day that useless man will come looking for you, my only fear is that one day you might allow him your next relationships going by what I read here.

Madam. Ndo oo...

You need to forget he exists. Biko, I know it's not easy but try ehn, try just manage to take care of you and your baby.

That man is a baga. He's just bad news. You will see, the slimy rat b*.... would rear his ugly head once he's sees your in a good place, emotionally and financially.

Thanks all.