₦airaland Forum

So a lady becomes bitterly disappointed that the man she married is an embarrassment and a failure but this is exactly the same man she dated for 5 years before getting married. She is disappointed because she has failed to mould him into her ideal concept of a perfect man. Why are we preoccupied with the notion of changing people to suit our ideals of perfection and when we fail we blame that person for failing?

A man marries a woman and some how her lack of interest in current and foreign affairs bothers him. The wife was never keen or showed any ambition when they dated you laughed when she thought Condoleeza Rice was a side dish. Now you are too embarrassed to take her to meet your business clients what's changed? She was never an ambitious woman that was evident from the start.

And still you married her why are you disappointed now?
We are fixated and are in love with concepts. The idea that somehow this person will fit into what we think they should be. Why then is it a surprise to anyone that marriages and relationships fail?

They fail because we set ourselves to fail. We are in love with an idea not reality.

Raine80:
So a lady becomes bitterly disappointed that the man she married is an embarrassment and a failure but this is exactly the same man she dated for 5 years before getting married. She is disappointed because she has failed to mould him into her ideal concept of a perfect man. Why are we preoccupied with the notion of changing people to suit our ideals of perfection and when we fail we blame that person for failing?

A man marries a woman and some how her lack of interest in current and foreign affairs bothers him. The wife was never keen or showed any ambition when they dated you laughed when she thought Condoleeza Rice was a side dish. Now you are too embarrassed to take her to meet your business clients what's changed? She was never an ambitious woman that was evident from the start.

And still you married her why are you disappointed now?
We are fixated and are in love with concepts. The idea that somehow this person will fit into what we think they should be. Why then is it a surprise to anyone that marriages and relationships fail?

They fail because we set ourselves to fail. We are in love with an idea not reality.

I love your line of reasoning. Truly, your mind has evolved.

AfroSamurai:
I love your line of reasoning. Truly, your mind has evolved.

It takes awhile to warm up to me

Raine80:
It takes awhile to warm up to me

LOL. You're difficult to read. This minute you're all awesome, that minute you're stoic and totally different.

I wonder...

AfroSamurai:
LOL. You're difficult to read. This minute you're all awesome, that minute you're stoic and totally different.

I wonder...

Keeps you on your toes.

It boils down to the fact PEOPLE DO NOT CHANGE. I know it's debatable, but then, we all know the truth; people don't change

Don't expect any partner to change what he/she couldn't change during courtship

Raine
You don't disappoint!

Raine80:
Keeps you on your toes.

You know one can get tired easily, especially when one stand on his toes for too long.

AfroSamurai:
You know one can get tired easily, especially when one stand on his toes for too long.

Reprieves are permitted

Raine80:
Reprieves are permitted

Hmmm. What about 'yes' is it also permitted?.

AfroSamurai:
Hmmm. What about 'yes' is it also permitted?.

Perhaps

Raine80:
Perhaps

perhaps? Humour me, will you?