₦airaland Forum

Nice one, Op!

God bless you my sister and bless your marriage in Jesus name

Please yourself first

Talk2Bella:
No matter how much a man might like or loves you, if his mother says NO! My sister better have a rethink of that relationship. Men do not joke with their mothers, a mother might tell her daughter she doesn’t want her to marry a particular guy; her daughter would protest and try to convince her mother how much she loves that guy, very few Nigerian girls actually listen to their mothers when told not to marry a certain guy.

So it’s finally time to meet the future mother in law, you’re thinking of ways to make her like you, make her accept you, make her see you as the good girl you are or are not; this is probably one of the hardest and most scariest times of a woman’s life it is a must his mother should like and accept you even if his father does accept you and the mother doesn’t you’re still on a long thing.

Are you a slay queen? Skimpy dresser, twerker, poster of rubbish, online fighter, heavy make-up applier, the first thing you should notice when you go visit your future mother in law is the type of phone she uses, Nigerian women are natural detectives, it’s in our blood there’s no denying that, immediately you notice this hurriedly log onto your social media accounts and start deleting, deletes those raunchy videos, stupid posts, sexy pictures, her son might like it but definitely not a Nigerian mother in law.

Do not ever let her serve you food! I repeat never ever let her cook and serve you a meal when you visit for the first time, a Nigerian mother in law would test you with everything and nothing pleases them more than knowing you’re hardworking and would never turn their sons into slaves; when she asks you what would you like to eat say in this exact manner “Mama tell me what you would love to eat let me cook and serve you” she might protest and call you a visitor but please do not be deceived follow her to the kitchen and assist and while you’re there do not stand like a robot, chat her up make her smile and ASSIST!

Show her you are a prayer warrior, if she sneezes say “Bless You Ma” if she complains of backache say “The Lord Will Heal You Soon” before you eat a meal in her house offer a prayer, anything you say infuse and quote bible verses, you can never go wrong with these.

Mothers love to be pampered, on the D-day your future husband has deemed you worthy to meet his mother do not go empty handed, go with a gift be it small or mighty go with one. Do not dress scantily or shabbily to go visit her, do not apply heavy make-up, do not make crazy hairstyles even if your man likes you that way, you aren’t trying to please him it’s his mother who might have the final say especially if he is a mummy’s boy.

Learn his language if you’re from different tribes, nothing pleases a mother more than conversing with a stranger in her own language, don’t go there and be forming Oyibo, even white women have learnt to please our men by cooking our local meals and learning our languages if they can do these my sister who you be? Based on logistics.

Are you a Muslim woman? Do you observe your 5 daily prayers? Do you wear your Hijab often? Do you go to the mosque? If the answers to these are NO NO NO And NO! carry your prayer mat along when going to visit her, show her you’re devoted Muslim .

Sometimes I look at my Mother and I say haa dear baby Jesus I don’t want my mother as a future mother in law biko, why? Because my brother is her only son and any girl he brings must have a comma, she’s too short na Ikechukwu, hian but why’s she so tall Nnam? Oh she’s a tailor, so you didn’t see a graduate abi? bia Nwokem when will you bring the right woman, I look at her and say but you chased them all away na, when they sleep over its war, she monitors when you wake up, how you do chores, how many worship and praise songs you can sing during morning devotion and if you dance worldly during church service lol, but when she likes you even my brother can’t chase you away.

Sometimes it takes very little for a Nigerian mother to love you, most times it takes a whole lot, it’s always under the guise of “I am doing what’s best for my son” funny thing is when we become mothers we exhibit these traits without even knowing, but do you know what conquers all these? Love, unconditional love, I have met girls who have prayed for their future mother in laws to be dead before her son comes to marry her, some women go into marriages ready to battle their future mother in laws, but this is all wrong, Nigerian movies has even made it worse with the portrayal of mother in laws and how selfish, mean and diabolical they can be.

The way you treat your mother should be the way you treat every elderly person, the moment her son marries you; you are automatically her child and you should accord her all respect you would your real mother because one day reverse would be the case and Karma doesn’t forget, do all the things you did when you met her, some mothers honestly can push you to the wall but always chant this Mantra “WHAT IF SHE IS MY MOTHER”


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFMFL3MRXw0


Isabella Ibeji

This is really informative, buh I don't think all these tricks would work on my mum

lovely post u can't go wrong with this ladies

in-laws, which way...?

That was how I DUMPED a lady who refused to join me to see my family.... despite the LOVE I had for her then.....

She was just an inborn error, in terms of stubbornness

Bullishit! Pretending to be who u are not won't do a thing. Just be Urself!

Oluwanimoduroti:
Bullishit! Pretending to be who u are not won't do a thing. Just be Urself!

Hahahahahahaha
Are you saying an eediot, should display foolish skills on arrival...??

kimbra:
Just be yourself. I don't believe in trying to fake things, some mothers in-law are too tough to please.

99% are tough more especially if the guy is the only son

Hmm

There re many sides to dis write up

Wat happen after marriage she discovered u re nt wat u pretend 2 be ?

Some mother in law can make their daughter in law life miserable

Patience Ozokwor comes 2 mind

EVILFOREST:
Hahahahahahaha
Are you saying an eediot, should display foolish skills on arrival...??

So, if she tries to cover up her bad character, deceives ur mother, she falls for it, will the bad character not surface on the long run? By then you will be in it already. It's better she shows herself, if ur mum likes her; fine! If she doesn't, you should go ur seperate ways... Abi!

Op that's very beautifully put. Kudos.
Wives nowadays overate themselves into thinking they are equal to mothers or even more. Some even have the audacity to ask it's me or your mother!

Oluwanimoduroti:
Bullishit! Pretending to be who u are not won't do a thing. Just be Urself!

its simple logic just make dem feel good and assured that there son wh dey worked hard to raise is in safe hands if u like continue being urself bullshit go soon turn to goatshit

na MIL wey no get job or husband dey frustrate DIL na, rabbish

I broke up with my fiance of 1 year recently because the mom felt I woke up "late".

She came over to my ex place to celebrate her birthday with one of her daughters alongside her kids and they planned to stay for 3 days. On the 1st day of visit I worked in the kitchen all through and did not stop until about 11:30pm, the daughter had to tell me to go rest.

Fast forward Monday morning after waking up, I decided to stay back a bit in the room before coming out only for me to be told I woke up late. Ha!!!! It became a big issue coupled with the fact that I am not Yoruba. Long story short, the mum said her son cannot marry me because I am not Yoruba and the Son instead of fighting immediately agreed with the mum and that was the end of the relationship.

It was painful though but I had to thank God for breaking us can't imagine in marriage the mother will start controlling from outside.

dingbang:
What's Bella saying again... Its good for a man to respect his mother but its cowardice for him to dump his love because of his mother's insecurities... I have said my own..

Ayanfeoluwaoba:
I broke up with my fiance of 1 year recently because the mom felt I woke up "late".

She came over to my ex place to celebrate her birthday with one of her daughters alongside her kids and they planned to stay for 3 days. On the 1st day of visit I worked in the kitchen all through and did not stop until about 11:30pm, the daughter had to tell me to go rest.

Fast forward Monday morning after waking up, I decided to stay back a bit in the room before coming out only for me to be told I woke up late. Ha!!!! It became a big issue coupled with the fact that I am not Yoruba. Long story short, the mum said her son cannot marry me because I am not Yoruba and the Son instead of fighting immediately agreed with the mum and that was the end of the relationship.

It was painful though but I had to thank God for breaking us can't imagine in marriage the mother will start controlling from outside.

you working all day until 11:30pm has qualified you for being a priceless wife... They lost a gem.. Their loss darling.. I wish I can marry you.. Like seriously..

Always ask baba God to enter into your mother-in-law heart to win her favor ...

Oluwanimoduroti:
So, if she tries to cover up her bad character, deceives ur mother, she falls for it, will the bad character not surface on the long run? By then you will be in it already. It's better she shows herself, if ur mum likes her; fine! If she doesn't, you should go ur seperate ways... Abi!

Now you Nailed it....

dingbang:
What's Bella saying again... Its good for a man to respect his mother but its cowardice for him to dump his love because of his mother's insecurities... I have said my own..

You didn't live with your mother when you were growing up. If you did, you would hold her at high esteem. You think I go dye was foolish? Praiz nkon.

There's a bond between mums and sons esp when you are the first son. You can always find another love but you can't find another mother.



But if you marry the Lady already and your mum excesses spring up.. Let her know that you are now owned by her and your wife.


Do not go against your mum for a gf or fiancée. Not worth it


Besides. The same girl u disagree with your mother for would also bare a son and the attachment would grow between her and her son.

choose mum over bae anytime

This is super lovely. One of the best posts I've ever read on nl.

speechless

boiz2men:
You didn't live with your mother when you were growing up. If you did, you would hold her at high esteem. You think I go dye was foolish? Praiz nkon.

There's a bond between mums and sons esp when you are the first son. You can always find another love but you can't find another mother.



But if you marry the Lady already and your mum excesses spring up.. Let her know that you are now owned by her and your wife.


Do not go against your mum for a gf or fiancée. Not worth it


Besides. The same girl u disagree with your mother for would also bare a son and the attachment would grow between her and her son.

choose mum over bae anytime

sorry.. My wife over mum... Thank you..

Ayanfeoluwaoba:
I broke up with my fiance of 1 year recently because the mom felt I woke up "late".

She came over to my ex place to celebrate her birthday with one of her daughters alongside her kids and they planned to stay for 3 days. On the 1st day of visit I worked in the kitchen all through and did not stop until about 11:30pm, the daughter had to tell me to go rest.

Fast forward Monday morning after waking up, I decided to stay back a bit in the room before coming out only for me to be told I woke up late. Ha!!!! It became a big issue coupled with the fact that I am not Yoruba. Long story short, the mum said her son cannot marry me because I am not Yoruba and the Son instead of fighting immediately agreed with the mum and that was the end of the relationship.

It was painful though but I had to thank God for breaking us can't imagine in marriage the mother will start controlling from outside.

so sorry you had to go thru that

Ayanfeoluwaoba:
I broke up with my fiance of 1 year recently because the mom felt I woke up "late".

She came over to my ex place to celebrate her birthday with one of her daughters alongside her kids and they planned to stay for 3 days. On the 1st day of visit I worked in the kitchen all through and did not stop until about 11:30pm, the daughter had to tell me to go rest.

Fast forward Monday morning after waking up, I decided to stay back a bit in the room before coming out only for me to be told I woke up late. Ha!!!! It became a big issue coupled with the fact that I am not Yoruba. Long story short, the mum said her son cannot marry me because I am not Yoruba and the Son instead of fighting immediately agreed with the mum and that was the end of the relationship.

It was painful though but I had to thank God for breaking us can't imagine in marriage the mother will start controlling from outside.

So Sorry about that.....
But...
U will still behave the same when your time comes.
It's just a matter of time.
It's a CHARACTER that is pathognomonic of women

dingbang:
sorry.. My wife over mum... Thank you..

Lol. Of course. But not gf or fiancée

Santi69:



So, for how long should she keep up the charade?

I wonder oh

ednut1:
na MIL wey no get job or husband dey frustrate DIL na, rabbish

Exactly! If she get job, abi husband, she won't have time to monitor her son's home.

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