₦airaland Forum

First time I would love ur post.

I understand women have to follow rules and all but what are men doing to protect their love from their over controlling mothers.?? Somebody wrote when will the charade end. Truely, when because some mother in laws are extremely hard to please. Some sister in law too. Kilode?some Nigerian women can become slaves in order to marry sha. olorun a ko wa to o

mikeycharles:
Love your mother like your own mother

Simple
Case closed .

Put her for alter and worship her. But even then, the wicked ones would still destroy your home.

Talk2Bella:
No matter how much a man might like or loves you, if his mother says NO! My sister better have a rethink of that relationship. Men do not joke with their mothers, a mother might tell her daughter she doesn’t want her to marry a particular guy; her daughter would protest and try to convince her mother how much she loves that guy, very few Nigerian girls actually listen to their mothers when told not to marry a certain guy.

So it’s finally time to meet the future mother in law, you’re thinking of ways to make her like you, make her accept you, make her see you as the good girl you are or are not; this is probably one of the hardest and most scariest times of a woman’s life it is a must his mother should like and accept you even if his father does accept you and the mother doesn’t you’re still on a long thing.

Are you a slay queen? Skimpy dresser, twerker, poster of rubbish, online fighter, heavy make-up applier, the first thing you should notice when you go visit your future mother in law is the type of phone she uses, Nigerian women are natural detectives, it’s in our blood there’s no denying that, immediately you notice this hurriedly log onto your social media accounts and start deleting, deletes those raunchy videos, stupid posts, sexy pictures, her son might like it but definitely not a Nigerian mother in law.

Do not ever let her serve you food! I repeat never ever let her cook and serve you a meal when you visit for the first time, a Nigerian mother in law would test you with everything and nothing pleases them more than knowing you’re hardworking and would never turn their sons into slaves; when she asks you what would you like to eat say in this exact manner “Mama tell me what you would love to eat let me cook and serve you” she might protest and call you a visitor but please do not be deceived follow her to the kitchen and assist and while you’re there do not stand like a robot, chat her up make her smile and ASSIST!

Show her you are a prayer warrior, if she sneezes say “Bless You Ma” if she complains of backache say “The Lord Will Heal You Soon” before you eat a meal in her house offer a prayer, anything you say infuse and quote bible verses, you can never go wrong with these.

Mothers love to be pampered, on the D-day your future husband has deemed you worthy to meet his mother do not go empty handed, go with a gift be it small or mighty go with one. Do not dress scantily or shabbily to go visit her, do not apply heavy make-up, do not make crazy hairstyles even if your man likes you that way, you aren’t trying to please him it’s his mother who might have the final say especially if he is a mummy’s boy.

Learn his language if you’re from different tribes, nothing pleases a mother more than conversing with a stranger in her own language, don’t go there and be forming Oyibo, even white women have learnt to please our men by cooking our local meals and learning our languages if they can do these my sister who you be? Based on logistics.

Are you a Muslim woman? Do you observe your 5 daily prayers? Do you wear your Hijab often? Do you go to the mosque? If the answers to these are NO NO NO And NO! carry your prayer mat along when going to visit her, show her you’re devoted Muslim .

Sometimes I look at my Mother and I say haa dear baby Jesus I don’t want my mother as a future mother in law biko, why? Because my brother is her only son and any girl he brings must have a comma, she’s too short na Ikechukwu, hian but why’s she so tall Nnam? Oh she’s a tailor, so you didn’t see a graduate abi? bia Nwokem when will you bring the right woman, I look at her and say but you chased them all away na, when they sleep over its war, she monitors when you wake up, how you do chores, how many worship and praise songs you can sing during morning devotion and if you dance worldly during church service lol, but when she likes you even my brother can’t chase you away.

Sometimes it takes very little for a Nigerian mother to love you, most times it takes a whole lot, it’s always under the guise of “I am doing what’s best for my son” funny thing is when we become mothers we exhibit these traits without even knowing, but do you know what conquers all these? Love, unconditional love, I have met girls who have prayed for their future mother in laws to be dead before her son comes to marry her, some women go into marriages ready to battle their future mother in laws, but this is all wrong, Nigerian movies has even made it worse with the portrayal of mother in laws and how selfish, mean and diabolical they can be.

The way you treat your mother should be the way you treat every elderly person, the moment her son marries you; you are automatically her child and you should accord her all respect you would your real mother because one day reverse would be the case and Karma doesn’t forget, do all the things you did when you met her, some mothers honestly can push you to the wall but always chant this Mantra “WHAT IF SHE IS MY MOTHER”


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFMFL3MRXw0


Isabella Ibeji

All these plenty effort because of marriage. Ewooo. Its better to be yourself. I cannot meet my mother in law on d first day and tell her i want to cook. I am not desperate. Please let's not mislead people and make them look desperate .

I will just be myself with my in laws. I will be friendly but still be a little reserved, i wouldn't want them to be able to predict me

Nice one

Can't read Dat long epistle anyway am still single

Talk2Bella:
No matter how much a man might like or loves you, if his mother says NO! My sister better have a rethink of that relationship. Men do not joke with their mothers, a mother might tell her daughter she doesn’t want her to marry a particular guy; her daughter would protest and try to convince her mother how much she loves that guy, very few Nigerian girls actually listen to their mothers when told not to marry a certain guy.

So it’s finally time to meet the future mother in law, you’re thinking of ways to make her like you, make her accept you, make her see you as the good girl you are or are not; this is probably one of the hardest and most scariest times of a woman’s life it is a must his mother should like and accept you even if his father does accept you and the mother doesn’t you’re still on a long thing.

Are you a slay queen? Skimpy dresser, twerker, poster of rubbish, online fighter, heavy make-up applier, the first thing you should notice when you go visit your future mother in law is the type of phone she uses, Nigerian women are natural detectives, it’s in our blood there’s no denying that, immediately you notice this hurriedly log onto your social media accounts and start deleting, deletes those raunchy videos, stupid posts, sexy pictures, her son might like it but definitely not a Nigerian mother in law.

Do not ever let her serve you food! I repeat never ever let her cook and serve you a meal when you visit for the first time, a Nigerian mother in law would test you with everything and nothing pleases them more than knowing you’re hardworking and would never turn their sons into slaves; when she asks you what would you like to eat say in this exact manner “Mama tell me what you would love to eat let me cook and serve you” she might protest and call you a visitor but please do not be deceived follow her to the kitchen and assist and while you’re there do not stand like a robot, chat her up make her smile and ASSIST!

Show her you are a prayer warrior, if she sneezes say “Bless You Ma” if she complains of backache say “The Lord Will Heal You Soon” before you eat a meal in her house offer a prayer, anything you say infuse and quote bible verses, you can never go wrong with these.

Mothers love to be pampered, on the D-day your future husband has deemed you worthy to meet his mother do not go empty handed, go with a gift be it small or mighty go with one. Do not dress scantily or shabbily to go visit her, do not apply heavy make-up, do not make crazy hairstyles even if your man likes you that way, you aren’t trying to please him it’s his mother who might have the final say especially if he is a mummy’s boy.

Learn his language if you’re from different tribes, nothing pleases a mother more than conversing with a stranger in her own language, don’t go there and be forming Oyibo, even white women have learnt to please our men by cooking our local meals and learning our languages if they can do these my sister who you be? Based on logistics.

Are you a Muslim woman? Do you observe your 5 daily prayers? Do you wear your Hijab often? Do you go to the mosque? If the answers to these are NO NO NO And NO! carry your prayer mat along when going to visit her, show her you’re devoted Muslim .

Sometimes I look at my Mother and I say haa dear baby Jesus I don’t want my mother as a future mother in law biko, why? Because my brother is her only son and any girl he brings must have a comma, she’s too short na Ikechukwu, hian but why’s she so tall Nnam? Oh she’s a tailor, so you didn’t see a graduate abi? bia Nwokem when will you bring the right woman, I look at her and say but you chased them all away na, when they sleep over its war, she monitors when you wake up, how you do chores, how many worship and praise songs you can sing during morning devotion and if you dance worldly during church service lol, but when she likes you even my brother can’t chase you away.

Sometimes it takes very little for a Nigerian mother to love you, most times it takes a whole lot, it’s always under the guise of “I am doing what’s best for my son” funny thing is when we become mothers we exhibit these traits without even knowing, but do you know what conquers all these? Love, unconditional love, I have met girls who have prayed for their future mother in laws to be dead before her son comes to marry her, some women go into marriages ready to battle their future mother in laws, but this is all wrong, Nigerian movies has even made it worse with the portrayal of mother in laws and how selfish, mean and diabolical they can be.

The way you treat your mother should be the way you treat every elderly person, the moment her son marries you; you are automatically her child and you should accord her all respect you would your real mother because one day reverse would be the case and Karma doesn’t forget, do all the things you did when you met her, some mothers honestly can push you to the wall but always chant this Mantra “WHAT IF SHE IS MY MOTHER”


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFMFL3MRXw0


Isabella Ibeji

i just think u dont start wat u cant finish..cos some mothers are super hard to please even if u give them ur eyes...i feel u shouldnt be too pushy nd if u wana help out she says no oga jst rest....

Hmmm... that's all for a mother in-law that doesn't deal with you and her son with Diabolical powers... many of them are the ones digging their sons grave while the sons feel their mothers are their all in all...

kimbra:
Just be yourself. I don't believe in trying to fake things, some mothers in-law are too tough to please.

so
true.. but also the other way round, some mothers in-laws are very easy to please..

like my mum, very easy,...all my sister in-laws to be, did was,

make sure dey dont shout when shes sleeping or studying, and
make sure they dont call her excessively..
the woman hate disturbance gan ..I got that character fom her

Talk2Bella:
wow me I'm speechless lol she probably is used to getting ways one thing I have learnt in this life is never to argue with an older person even if you're right they always see it as a sign of disrespect

please bella I need to talk with you, there's this girl I fell in love with I've know her for two years before proposing to her early March this year... my problem is she is no longer giving me attention I needed, took her long to reply my WhatsApp message and rarely call or return my call, when asked her out she would tell me she will be busy either going to for decorating work or attending church programme and I think she were just using it as an excuse to avoid me maybe I could be wrong about it cos she is not a liar... she really love me and always lively around me she suddenly change after I made my mind known to her... we going to meet tomorrow what will u advise me to do and think too

If some ladies like, they can follow these steps and fake all they like, divorce will not elude them.
You can't fake things and go into marriage, you may succeed to wed the guy, but the marriage will evict you, as things will show who you are.
Better you appear real, if the woman likes you, fine, if she doesn't, then forge ahead, faking all will only make the marriage an enduring war ground......

Good one

Mrcapability7:
please bella I need to talk with you, there's this girl I fell in love with I've know her for two years before proposing to her early March this year... my problem is she is no longer giving me attention I needed, took her long to reply my WhatsApp message and rarely call or return my call, when asked her out she would tell me she will be busy either going to for decorating work or attending church programme and I think she were just using it as an excuse to avoid me maybe I could be wrong about it cos she is not a liar... she really love me and always lively around me she suddenly change after I made my mind known to her... we going to meet tomorrow what will u advise me to do and think too

When u see her tomorrow Man up and ask her why she's behaving that way, you said yourself she's not a liar so ask her why

Talk2Bella:
When u see her tomorrow Man up and ask her why she's behaving that way, you said yourself she's not a liar so ask her why

And u didn't give me ur thought on the issue

Ayanfeoluwaoba:
I broke up with my fiance of 1 year recently because the mom felt I woke up "late".

She came over to my ex place to celebrate her birthday with one of her daughters alongside her kids and they planned to stay for 3 days. On the 1st day of visit I worked in the kitchen all through and did not stop until about 11:30pm, the daughter had to tell me to go rest.

Fast forward Monday morning after waking up, I decided to stay back a bit in the room before coming out only for me to be told I woke up late. Ha!!!! It became a big issue coupled with the fact that I am not Yoruba. Long story short, the mum said her son cannot marry me because I am not Yoruba and the Son instead of fighting immediately agreed with the mum and that was the end of the relationship.

It was painful though but I had to thank God for breaking us can't imagine in marriage the mother will start controlling from outside.

Jesus christ... just like that? am happy for you that it's all over... whc family should even feel more insecure? isn't it the bride's family in whc their daughter vowed to spend her entire life with a stranger.. but the reverse is the case... # lips sealed #

Mrcapability7:
And u didn't give me ur thought on the issue

it is not for me to to that, no matter what I say you would do what you feel is best, no one knows your fiancee more than you do that's why I said you're the only one in a position to really find out what's wrong I can't give u any advice more than this

Talk2Bella:
it is not for me to do that, no matter what I say you would do what you feel is best, no one knows your fiancee more than you do that's why I said you're the only one in a position to really find out what's wrong I can't give u any advice more than this

I seem can't think clear and that's why I need ur attention right now please I need ur take on the issue no matter how cruel it sound and honestly I am going meet her tomorrow with an empty head.. I need ur suggestions and thoughts

debchi:
hello nigeria, there is a lot going on here in nigeria, that is going to bring you financial freedom and not only that but will teach you on how to creat wealth with your social media at hand. Do not worry is not HYIP, MLM, FOREX, binary options, and cryptocurrencies. contact me via my email deb122015@gmail.com and phone num 0905263450. I LL DISCLOSE THE SECRET HERE, IF YOU ARE SEROIUS GIVE ME A CALL OR A CHAT.

U don dey gv us ur glo number na.. becus money is involved.. u 4 drop ur mtn so we go kw... cari ur head one side jor

I sincerely understand where u are coming from, but the truth is I won't live with my child, I can't choose for my adult child, I can only guide, moreover nobody knows what tomorrow will bring.

Let's stop it already.....I pray to marry a man that still have a Mother.

EVILFOREST:
So Sorry about that.....
But...
U will still behave the same when your time comes.
It's just a matter of time.
It's a CHARACTER that is pathognomonic of women

Please be yourself

I just believe in being yourself and using wisdom and not playing games.

Not all men are that attached to their mums that they cannot make a decision and stand by it. If a man's mum keeps influencing his decison, that is a serious problem. That would mean that he's still a child in his mind no matter how macho and mature he looks.

Over the years i have noticed that it is "mostly" the yoraba mums that give plenty wahala and have this strong hold on their sons. They demand so much from the sons like they owe them for their existence. It's just what i have noticed.

Talk2Bella:
No matter how much a man might like or loves you, if his mother says NO! My sister better have a rethink of that relationship. Men do not joke with their mothers, a mother might tell her daughter she doesn’t want her to marry a particular guy; her daughter would protest and try to convince her mother how much she loves that guy, very few Nigerian girls actually listen to their mothers when told not to marry a certain guy.

So it’s finally time to meet the future mother in law, you’re thinking of ways to make her like you, make her accept you, make her see you as the good girl you are or are not; this is probably one of the hardest and most scariest times of a woman’s life it is a must his mother should like and accept you even if his father does accept you and the mother doesn’t you’re still on a long thing.

Are you a slay queen? Skimpy dresser, twerker, poster of rubbish, online fighter, heavy make-up applier, the first thing you should notice when you go visit your future mother in law is the type of phone she uses, Nigerian women are natural detectives, it’s in our blood there’s no denying that, immediately you notice this hurriedly log onto your social media accounts and start deleting, deletes those raunchy videos, stupid posts, sexy pictures, her son might like it but definitely not a Nigerian mother in law.

Do not ever let her serve you food! I repeat never ever let her cook and serve you a meal when you visit for the first time, a Nigerian mother in law would test you with everything and nothing pleases them more than knowing you’re hardworking and would never turn their sons into slaves; when she asks you what would you like to eat say in this exact manner “Mama tell me what you would love to eat let me cook and serve you” she might protest and call you a visitor but please do not be deceived follow her to the kitchen and assist and while you’re there do not stand like a robot, chat her up make her smile and ASSIST!

Show her you are a prayer warrior, if she sneezes say “Bless You Ma” if she complains of backache say “The Lord Will Heal You Soon” before you eat a meal in her house offer a prayer, anything you say infuse and quote bible verses, you can never go wrong with these.

Mothers love to be pampered, on the D-day your future husband has deemed you worthy to meet his mother do not go empty handed, go with a gift be it small or mighty go with one. Do not dress scantily or shabbily to go visit her, do not apply heavy make-up, do not make crazy hairstyles even if your man likes you that way, you aren’t trying to please him it’s his mother who might have the final say especially if he is a mummy’s boy.

Learn his language if you’re from different tribes, nothing pleases a mother more than conversing with a stranger in her own language, don’t go there and be forming Oyibo, even white women have learnt to please our men by cooking our local meals and learning our languages if they can do these my sister who you be? Based on logistics.

Are you a Muslim woman? Do you observe your 5 daily prayers? Do you wear your Hijab often? Do you go to the mosque? If the answers to these are NO NO NO And NO! carry your prayer mat along when going to visit her, show her you’re devoted Muslim .

Sometimes I look at my Mother and I say haa dear baby Jesus I don’t want my mother as a future mother in law biko, why? Because my brother is her only son and any girl he brings must have a comma, she’s too short na Ikechukwu, hian but why’s she so tall Nnam? Oh she’s a tailor, so you didn’t see a graduate abi? bia Nwokem when will you bring the right woman, I look at her and say but you chased them all away na, when they sleep over its war, she monitors when you wake up, how you do chores, how many worship and praise songs you can sing during morning devotion and if you dance worldly during church service lol, but when she likes you even my brother can’t chase you away.

Sometimes it takes very little for a Nigerian mother to love you, most times it takes a whole lot, it’s always under the guise of “I am doing what’s best for my son” funny thing is when we become mothers we exhibit these traits without even knowing, but do you know what conquers all these? Love, unconditional love, I have met girls who have prayed for their future mother in laws to be dead before her son comes to marry her, some women go into marriages ready to battle their future mother in laws, but this is all wrong, Nigerian movies has even made it worse with the portrayal of mother in laws and how selfish, mean and diabolical they can be.

The way you treat your mother should be the way you treat every elderly person, the moment her son marries you; you are automatically her child and you should accord her all respect you would your real mother because one day reverse would be the case and Karma doesn’t forget, do all the things you did when you met her, some mothers honestly can push you to the wall but always chant this Mantra “WHAT IF SHE IS MY MOTHER”


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFMFL3MRXw0

Isabella Ibeji

Not all mothers-in-law are as exactly as you have alleged but a considerable no of them are nothing but a chaos.

kimbra:
Just be yourself. I don't believe in trying to fake things, some mothers in-law are too tough to please.

Based on your fact, what could be done by ladies to lessen or avert d issue?

kimbra:
Just be yourself. I don't believe in trying to fake things, some mothers in-law are too tough to please.

very tru lyk mine u must nt make up even u must nt fix or make atachment, dere was even a day she asked me nt to cook jollof rice with curry nd thyme u knw all dis deeper life pple naw we dnt even sleep in d same room wen i go dere

kimbra:
Just be yourself. I don't believe in trying to fake things, some mothers in-law are too tough to please.

very tru lyk mine u must nt make up even u must nt fix or make atachment, dere was even a day she asked me nt to cook jollof rice with curry nd thyme u knw all dis deeper life pple naw we dnt even sleep in d same room wen i go dere

kimbra:
Just be yourself. I don't believe in trying to fake things, some mothers in-law are too tough to please.

very tru lyk mine u must nt make up even u must nt fix or make atachment, dere was even a day she asked me nt to cook jollof rice with curry nd thyme u knw all dis deeper life pple naw we dnt even sleep in d same room wen i go dere

.

Your mother in-law is automatically your mother.I know how my mom and my sister regrets not having one.I pray i get one in future.Life can be harder when you don't have one.I pray i get one.

You sound great!
Thank God for my future gf sha...

sweetilicious:
Your mother in-law is automatically your mother.I know how my mom and my sister regrets not having one.I pray i get one in future.Life can be harder when you don't have one.I pray i get one.

Better!!!

Story, all dis things na high service.. Just b ursef nd if God wants u to be married into dat family, t Wil definitely work.. Just treat her with respect nd treat her d way u do to ur own mother. Shikena

I pity some ladies who'd be like "Be yourself" even when you're indiscipline from your home. What you portray at your first meeting sometimes matters, beside the fact that you should see her as your own mother, it's just for you to have peace if you think the relationship is worth it.