₦airaland Forum

MirJay:
... To all the SARS and Police people that are involved in this criminal activities, below are my statements and declarations for your lives;

1. May you die prematurely
2. May you rot before you die
3. May illiteracy run severely all through your generation.
4. May you all go Impotents.

Kindly say Amen.
Thunder fire all of una.

Amen In Jesus name. Even if my relation is involve he/she too must share from these curse.

spanzed:
On a lighter note ....When is Sars doing their recruitment abeg

see dem

waiting be "O mi Gongo" ;DNaija Me I don dey tired for Naija since o, but some people if the hing never happen to them dem go just dey tell you say naija go better, hmm for where?

abmendozer:
I can totally relate to this. Sometime last month I took my brother's car to do some run around, on my way returning home I was pulled over by police, before I knew what was happening they told me to come out and began searching my phone.
They asked me how will I be driving venza that where did I steal the car from. Two of the police officers jumped into the car and told me to drive to the police station(without checking any paper oh) which I agreed to. I decided to open the window for ventilation, then one of the officer said "oga wind the window up and on the AC o" I was too angry to respond. On our way to the station, they started asking series of question like 'what is G?' 'What is my nickname?' Etc
To cut the long short, we got to the station and the officers started singing 9ice living things line 'owo nikan lo leshe' meaning it's only money that can solve the problem.
I paid 5k and left there angrily.

Still dunno why this hasn't happened to me.
Good lord, heaven will fall that day. are they mad?
I'll make sure they dismiss those policemen.
Yeye people

timidapsin:
Dear Nigerian police, 500k to bail my self? (what a funny encounter today!)
Based on the 777, Edo police took it upon themselves to make some cool cash, knowing fully well people would send location messages to friends about the event...

Before i go on: "I would be happy, if federal government could tutor old and incoming police about what INTERNET / Online business is" it will save the stupidity many are putting on themselves.

To save your stress in this life: Let your sent messages, received, draft be always at zero, anything is an offense to SARs i swear.
i showed them ID no way, i showed them my Cooperate Acc Cheque, they claim almost every G boys now have cooperate Acc / Dorm account, i should show them real facts.

They made me pull of my shirt (chai) searched my body for any marks, checked my thumbs if it has been manipulated, several useless cheques
i told them Google adsense is one of the source, they said anything relating to online is CYBER CRIME, i try to explain that its when its being used fraudulently they say NO, as far as i goto Google and search who to defraud, immediately i fainted in spirit..

They saw Bank transactions and flared up, i begged them to give me access to my phone they ignore, they read my SMS one by one till ending..
When i knew they were blatant illiterates is when: The started checking my Facebook Timeline/wall from their phone with the name found on my ID and said why would i have so much comments on my posts, that i am fraudulent.. i totally stopped talking cos i couldn't convince them anymore, it seems all they want is money.

They saw a comment from one Icekid Dah saying "OMG", they said it means "O mi Gongo", that am a "Marphites", they saw another comment of "mmm", they said its MMM that am using MMM to defraud people.

i was boiling inside mehn, that kind thing, totally restricted to make calls or prove a point..
One said if i am making money online i should give them Adsense number so they can call and confirm (i just weak!)
They said if i cant provide details of people i claim pays me, then am literally doing it illegal, How the they get my account details to always pay me, No way to further explain cos i was not with a browsing phone and it seems they do not even know what E-Mail means...

After few hours with them, i had to reason along the money side, but before then..
Who say police/SARs are not making money? it is one of the lucrative jobs right now, i saw over 100 brown envelopes pilled in with money in accordance to several office with names on each, right before my eyes people where paying 100k, 50k etc just to free themselves (would i challenged them? i was just looking, trying to prove my point because 500k is so ridiculous)

When i discovered i was the only one left and the other idiot was writing a Detention Order (he wrote DENETION instead Lol)
Should i price 500k? i dey mad, even if am worth more i rather sleep in cell than lavish money, i decided to start begging, they where now happy, then said this is what i should have been doing instead of quoting laws (if i hear u say Nigeria have any laws eehn, we have broken our ten commandments)...
"With Pain", i brought out 5k and said Sir please manage it its for you all, the bargain started, they claimed commissioner knows about my case, becos the scene i created was too large that if not 400k am sleeping cell, after much much, as an Igbo boy, i still gave them the 5k, we all became friends gave them few recharge cards, and they are inviting me over..

These are the Tips they gave me, as am now their younger brother:


Now: are these the police that claims to be our friends? so no young man is free? even if not, atleast given a benefit of explanation..
They keep shouting "Oboy say the truth, U dey press, abi you no know say na we first start cultism and yahoo for this benin" - Why do not arrest yourselves instead?

Today, i became tired of Nigeria, i wept for my dear Nation, all those patrol agents all they do is catch get undocumented bail to enrich their pockets..
We are now friends tho, but if i have spiritual powers, i would just wipe out all the officers in that office tonight (God answer this prayer) LOL...


Fidelis Ozuawala

Don't make them your friend please. And please make this known on their facebook and twitter handle.

zeedof:
They only transfer aggression over you bro. They just paid them and some haven't got alert yet also some have already taken huge loan so they ain't expecting money.

You don't know your way to too that's why. The most easiest force is police

Take this guide if you are clean or already perfect yourself or phone

Stop if they stop you,

If it's just road checking great them normal and cracks joke like oga officer Uba Weldon ooo

If they block you on motion wrongly immediately you drop rake for them small because they have gun and most of them are frustrated

If they ask for your paper give them

Your work give them id

If they don't know tell them you don't expect them to know all because they ain't God

If they term you as g boy, quietly tell the office is an insult to you if he doesn't take that back his gonna regret it

Before they talk to much as for team leader and if team leader thinking like them quickly tell them you will like you go to station with them that's where you can explain your self. Bro they will let you go if they don't go to station and get a paper to write a statement put all the harassment in detail and ask for you leave if they don't tell them you want to speak with your lawyer.... They will beg you last.....



A police stopped me and asked for my phone. I gave it to him and he said what's is my password, I laugh and say to him, I only gave you the phone to check if someone is missing, also respect you being NPF not because of you. And now if you want to access the phone then you and I will o to your station and write and agreement that you want to access my phone and you bear whatever goes wrong because I work in bank and the access code I used in saved on my phone. They will leave you bro. When matter goes out of hand even the CP will beg you....



Hmmmmm


Me get 7 qualified lawyer in my family oooo so no go mess up

Tell them bro.

IJOBA2:
HAVE YOU FVCKED THE SO CALLED POLICE WOMEN BEFORE

This one's wife/mom is a police lol

Reference:
Yes, that is exactly what I am saying. Or do you want to ignore the fact that there is cyber crime. When you operate in a hazardous environment you wear PPE not only for safety but the brightly adorned gear makes you visible when things get nasty. Get references by having tangibles. Much of the cyberworld is in the shade. Blogs and the rest were started by writers, journalists and the likes. They had tangible means of identity and a physical presence anyone who is doing the right thing should have. It is not only the police you will have issues with. The tax man as well will not be able to track you. The same problems cyber multinationals are having globally with authorities on crime, legislation and tax matters. No matter how cyber you are, you remain in the shadows until you go physical.

You are half-baked

DatLagboi:
see dem

Bros na the way now ooo....

nkemdi89:
Police women are the worst, they like free food and drink so much, they like sex like mad, and whenever they see money their eyes will be sharper than zakky touch.

*coughs* they like sex like mad?
How u take know

abmendozer:
I can totally relate to this. Sometime last month I took my brother's car to do some run around, on my way returning home I was pulled over by police, before I knew what was happening they told me to come out and began searching my phone.
They asked me how will I be driving venza that where did I steal the car from. Two of the police officers jumped into the car and told me to drive to the police station(without checking any paper oh) which I agreed to. I decided to open the window for ventilation, then one of the officer said "oga wind the window up and on the AC o" I was too angry to respond. On our way to the station, they started asking series of question like 'what is G?' 'What is my nickname?' Etc
To cut the long short, we got to the station and the officers started singing 9ice living things line 'owo nikan lo leshe' meaning it's only money that can solve the problem.
I paid 5k and left there angrily.

Lol.

That AC part and"what is G"?

@OP, IF ONE OF THEM READS THIS POST, HE WILL BE CONVINCED HOW U MAKE UR MONEY.... WHAT A HUMOROUS AND AT THE SAME TIME HILARIOUS PIECE. THE ADDITIONAL KNOWLEDGE HE JUST NEEDS TO ADD IS HOW 'THREAD TRAFFIC AND AD SENSE' PAYS...LOL!

Reference:
Oga. Go get a proper, practical, productive skill. That is what I advice all and sundry I meet for all sorts of reasons including this. With a skill comes an address. With an address comes witnesses in the form of clients and customers. You cannot go wrong with this even if you do 'online' by the side. You and the country in general will be better off. The whole ambit of cybercrime is to stay ahead of the knowledge curve. You know it, the police knows it and they capitalise on the knowledge deficit to extort. It is just in your interest to simplify your life by having an angle they can relate with. Add a proper, practical, physical, productive platform to your portfolio.

O gor

This country don tire me...

timidapsin:
Dear Nigerian police, 500k to bail my self? (what a funny encounter today!)
Based on the 777, Edo police took it upon themselves to make some cool cash, knowing fully well people would send location messages to friends about the event...

Before i go on: "I would be happy, if federal government could tutor old and incoming police about what INTERNET / Online business is" it will save the stupidity many are putting on themselves.

To save your stress in this life: Let your sent messages, received, draft be always at zero, anything is an offense to SARs i swear.
i showed them ID no way, i showed them my Cooperate Acc Cheque, they claim almost every G boys now have cooperate Acc / Dorm account, i should show them real facts.

They made me pull of my shirt (chai) searched my body for any marks, checked my thumbs if it has been manipulated, several useless cheques
i told them Google adsense is one of the source, they said anything relating to online is CYBER CRIME, i try to explain that its when its being used fraudulently they say NO, as far as i goto Google and search who to defraud, immediately i fainted in spirit..

They saw Bank transactions and flared up, i begged them to give me access to my phone they ignore, they read my SMS one by one till ending..
When i knew they were blatant illiterates is when: The started checking my Facebook Timeline/wall from their phone with the name found on my ID and said why would i have so much comments on my posts, that i am fraudulent.. i totally stopped talking cos i couldn't convince them anymore, it seems all they want is money.

They saw a comment from one Icekid Dah saying "OMG", they said it means "O mi Gongo", that am a "Marphites", they saw another comment of "mmm", they said its MMM that am using MMM to defraud people.

i was boiling inside mehn, that kind thing, totally restricted to make calls or prove a point..
One said if i am making money online i should give them Adsense number so they can call and confirm (i just weak!)
They said if i cant provide details of people i claim pays me, then am literally doing it illegal, How the they get my account details to always pay me, No way to further explain cos i was not with a browsing phone and it seems they do not even know what E-Mail means...

After few hours with them, i had to reason along the money side, but before then..
Who say police/SARs are not making money? it is one of the lucrative jobs right now, i saw over 100 brown envelopes pilled in with money in accordance to several office with names on each, right before my eyes people where paying 100k, 50k etc just to free themselves (would i challenged them? i was just looking, trying to prove my point because 500k is so ridiculous)

When i discovered i was the only one left and the other idiot was writing a Detention Order (he wrote DENETION instead Lol)
Should i price 500k? i dey mad, even if am worth more i rather sleep in cell than lavish money, i decided to start begging, they where now happy, then said this is what i should have been doing instead of quoting laws (if i hear u say Nigeria have any laws eehn, we have broken our ten commandments)...
"With Pain", i brought out 5k and said Sir please manage it its for you all, the bargain started, they claimed commissioner knows about my case, becos the scene i created was too large that if not 400k am sleeping cell, after much much, as an Igbo boy, i still gave them the 5k, we all became friends gave them few recharge cards, and they are inviting me over..

These are the Tips they gave me, as am now their younger brother:


Now: are these the police that claims to be our friends? so no young man is free? even if not, atleast given a benefit of explanation..
They keep shouting "Oboy say the truth, U dey press, abi you no know say na we first start cultism and yahoo for this benin" - Why do not arrest yourselves instead?

Today, i became tired of Nigeria, i wept for my dear Nation, all those patrol agents all they do is catch get undocumented bail to enrich their pockets..
We are now friends tho, but if i have spiritual powers, i would just wipe out all the officers in that office tonight (God answer this prayer) LOL...


Fidelis Ozuawala

same thing happened to a friend of mine, I was driving and he was riding shotgun, naso sarz stop us, the thought I was the driver and I played along my friend show his complementary cards and dude just came in from America, they said why will he have American complimentary cards if he was not a fraud. And dude owns a tech start-up, they said he is lying that all na fraud. Long story short we paid 10k to bail and became friends.

Police go as far as slotting dope into people's pocket so the can use as something to incriminate you.

I csrry torchlight only.
Plus my swfety tools
Lewrn martial arts
And kikl these bastards in seconds .sars my dic

Summerflame09:
please, why are u this unfortunate and ill fortuned ?.. Must u cause tribal war online with your poverty stricken mentality?.. Your useless parents copulation didn't yield good result, u should have been aborted all those times nah or which kind wahala be this?

AFONJA MUSLIM

luminouz:
*coughs* they like sex like mad?
How u take know

I get dem many as friends, including their men too, and I don stay police barracks well well, the women can pour themselves hot water because of their DPO in the station, they can poison their fellow woman police because of man.

IJOBA2:
HAVE YOU FVCKED THE SO CALLED POLICE WOMEN BEFORE

I stayed in the barracks and they have loosed tongues, nothing like secrecy in their life .

This Country heennn, i am not understanding Police stopped someone delivering a Car for me in PH at this same Benin, after checking custom papers n found nothing, they resorted to Registration of Plate no saying it's FAKE
They requested for text msg sent by mvaa and insurance coy from the driver as if the Vehicle belonged to him. After so much delay he parted with N500 Police is Truly your Friend after parting with money....

calculusx:
This Country heennn, i am not understanding Police stopped someone delivering a Car for me in PH at this same Benin, after checking custom papers n found nothing, they resorted to Registration of Plate no saying it's FAKE
They requested for text msg sent by mvaa and insurance coy from the driver as if the Vehicle belonged to him. After so much delay he parted with N500 Police is Truly your Friend after parting with money....

this sums it all police is truly your friend after parting with money....

If you have never been harrased by these SARS operatives

Ku orire

Cos you dont know what God is doing in your life

But they don't really do these in Ondo, Ondo town to be precise

And g boys plenty

Who even born them

When niggas dey carry juju inside bag

The only thing I know police do in Ondo is to settle husband and wife fight or chased tenant out of the house by the order of the landlord

If you even get bar for hand well dem go escort you from club at night reach your destination....

lol... abeg oo, I no be weyrey oo. I just wanted to stand my ground that day. I guess they couldn't really assault me because noticed I had little connect from my phone conversations.

Urbanoversabi:
Hmmmm When men in black jam Weyrey

MirJay:
... To all the SARS and Police people that are involved in this criminal activities, below are my statements and declarations for your lives;

1. May you die prematurely
2. May you rot before you die
3. May illiteracy run severely all through your generation.
4. May you all go Impotents.

Kindly say Amen.
Thunder fire all of una.

AMEN AMEN AMENAMEN AMEN AMEN
AMEN AMEN AMENAMEN AMEN AMEN
AMEN AMEN AMENAMEN AMEN AMEN
AMEN AMEN AMENAMEN AMEN AMEN
AMEN AMEN AMENAMEN AMEN AMEN
AMEN AMEN AMENAMEN AMEN AMEN

nkemdi89:
I get dem many as friends, including their men too, and I don stay police barracks well well, the women can pour themselves hot water because of their DPO in the station, they can poison their fellow woman police because of man.

Abeg...u fit hook me up with any unmarried among them

idris4eva:
But they don't really do these in Ondo, Ondo town to be precise

And g boys plenty

Who even born them

When niggas dey carry juju inside bag

The only thing I know police do in Ondo is to settle husband and wife fight or chased tenant out of the house by the order of the landlord

If you even get bar for hand well dem go escort you from club at night reach your destination....

U really stay in ondo town bro....na true u talk!

chillex8:
If you don't have a questionable character, not even the IGP will stop you and start asking for what is not lost.

You use a car with artificial tint

You don't have any valid form of identification

You dress inappropriately

You are corrupt(always tending to bribe)

You drive rough

You have incomplete or null vehicle particulars

Your DL is fake or expired


Why won't the SARS/police question you further and even take you to the station


I don't know how a police station counter looks like and have been driving well over 15 years.


Even if you talk to a police/SARS in the rudest form, if all of the above is absent he dare not apprehend.


What am I driving to the police station for?

Am I a criminal

What is the SARS/police looking for seated in my car

Or pressing my phone(s). Is he mad

We need a lot of orientation

Keep speaking that plenty English. Till the day you jam them