Coldfeet:
Who wants to know?

comtem2011:
My sister, no be small thing o. Sometimes, I look at him to be sure he is still the same innocent baby I gave birth to. We have stopped beating him cos its not even helping matter, had it been he had started school since, I will say he learnt it from there. I believe its a stage they will outgrow, but the time is what I don't know. God help us.

ebonychic18:


Hello.......the take a chill pill wasn't necessary. I asked because we were talking about toddlers here. I wanted to clarify that. I know you're not a fool.

Raddie:

*Smiles. An african!

comtem2011:
Wow, I was about calling you out when I saw this post.

How are you ma? longest time!!!

booqee:
thanks so much for ur concern.

The company i work does not have a branch in that location. Well just like you advised, i've decided to dump the idea of resignation. However, my husband is hoping for a relocation back to Lagos and he's working towards it.

Its really not easy living alone these past few days but i'm sure coping. My younger brother also slept over for the last two nights but its not really the same. Cos I dont even feel scared sleeping alone in the house, i only feel lonely.


Thanks ma..

Coldfeet:
I'm great sis! I pop in once in awhile. How's you and yours?

comtem2011:
We are fine! God bless u ma.

sassyangel1:



No teacher in their right senses can do wat u jst described except he/she is insane and the school authority will so deal wth such teacher. It's better u get to hear wat happened that warrant some kinda punishment on our children cos sometimes it could be that our kids r the ones @ fault n won't explain to mommy Hw dey threw an object @ another child and it mistakenly got to the eyes of the other child. If u don't always ask b4 reacting, u'll end up making matters worse whereby the teachers will jst hands off 4rm ur ward. They won't even be concerned abt d class or homework of such child, his or her performances in class et al

Coldfeet:

If a child injures yours wouldn't it be sensible to ask the parents to foot the medical bill? Or you are so sadistic that you prefer the child is beaten instead? An eye for an eye I see.

Coldfeet:
Punish him,

take away his toys,

lock him up in a room.

She doesn't mind.

But DONT BEAT!!!.

Was my understanding of that post.

Maybe you thought she meant a teacher that does all that?
Please assimilate a written post properly before lashing out.

Why shouldn't a teacher explore other means of discipline than use the cane?

If a child injures yours wouldn't it be sensible to ask the parents to foot the medical bill? Or you are so sadistic that you prefer the child is beaten instead? An eye for an eye I see.

zaynie:
It's okay o.
I wanted to post when this issue got raised but I chose to waka pass cos we take things too personal here.

The truth is good social behaviour is one of the indicators of milestones achieved in toddler.

If your child smashes things, bites, hits and bangs, it is highly unacceptable and that child still needs a lot of work. If he continues till age 3 or 4 he might actually need a therapist. True.
These are indicators that all isn't too well.
I have 2 kids of opposite temperaments, the older boy is very playful but calm.... Just like the dad.
The younger girl is not too playful but very temperamental. Very.
Now I was raising my first in a hard way, I wanted my child to be well behaved and this boy was vanishing before my eyes. He's playful yes but he would never hit or bite or scratch. Then I chilled and gave him attention and constructive play and he became this big boy overnight.
The younger one on the other hand, tough cookie but I've learnt not to hit. It hardly ever works.
So we worked on her listening skills. It wasn't easy but I'm reaping the rewards now. Last night when she was about to start, I just said "don't start, don't even think about it" and she walked away sulking. When I need her to sleep, I talk to her, it's time to go to bed now, let's close our eyes and snooze. She grumbles and sometimes whine but she knows I have no room for that.
Sometimes I resort to using my 2 fingers, that's like once in 2-3 weeks. Compared to when her brother was growing up I don't have a single cane in the house.
The brother is 5 now, there are some things he does that warrants belting, I roll till its just a bit and we have a go. This happens like once in a month or so. When he does something I have repeatedly warned him against. We thought he had a heart defect and everyone looks to me to spoil or over pamper him but I didn't.



Now from a teacher's point of view.
I have taught all ranges.
I beat shege out of the secondary school students cos they can like to give attitude, so dem kukuma fear me,but I can say none ever failed my course. I can never beat cos you failed or are yet to understand.
Give me attitude and you'll see the other side of me.
Then I taught Pry 5 and the kids loved me but one day I got too emotional and punished them, not beating sef and I totally forgot them there. I was pregnant with my first then. The next day, a boy's mother came to fight me but when she saw my state, she kukuma chill. I apologized and till date I feel so bad.
Then I taught 5 year olds in a school where beating was forbidden, it was there I finally figured out that the kids that are used to being beaten at home won't listen until you beat cos they won't take you serious, until you beat them. And the kids that listened were the ones their parents actually spoke to. Those were the well behaved ones, cos they're used to listening.
Then I taught 2-3 year olds, which is the age range of kids we're discussing now and I can tell you, don't beat that child!
As a teacher the couple of times I smacked a child was because he was bullying others after much talk.....like 2 months of talk and the day I gave him a good smack and told him if he ever hit anyone then I would do it to him too, he stopped and began reporting to teachers.



At the end of the day, do what's best for you and your child.

Liftedhands:
That's just it! Beating a toddler isn't the way to curb such behaviour. I've asked and seen other moms going thru same with their wards I'm convinced it will pass.

It's our duty to make sure they don't injure them selves or other in this process! I keep remotes and other weighty objects out of his reached so even if he must throw it won't be anything injurious.

They can so get on your nerves most times but I try to chill and count to 10 before I correct him with a calm and stern voice. Beating from childhood made me distance myself from my mom emotionally that till date i find it difficult to confide in her! I don't remember the nights she stayed awake watching over my sick ass BUT vividly remember the canes and yell!

I dont want my child to grow up distancing his feelings from me due to repressed memory of beatings.

A little smack here and there isn't bad but it shouldn't be a constant way of correction! Ask those that beat if it did any good? Other than make the child afraid and withdrawn?
Please don't beat get him distracted immediately you see him raise something to throw.

Perfectcrown
Blessedmum
Prettyhurts
Beyedew
Abiagirl777
Etc

Na God go see us thru this phase.

Raincolour:

Should it even get to this stage? No spoilt child should injure my child
Medical bill my foot. Train ur child not to injure or bully others please. I won't hear 'sorry I will pay medical bill'. I am not broke or destitute, madam. Hold your child well.

sassyangel1:


Pls, coldfeet don't explain wat we'v decided to end except u wana create anoda btw u n i. Yes, answer to ur question is an eye for an eye. I ain't gonna take any medical fee rather I'm gonna give my child d same weapon to use back on the bully while I wait for the parent and then we'll see wer it rolls from there. Cos as u take carry ur pikin 4 belle Na so I carry my own. I'v experienced both types of birth so don't think ur child will be punished while my child will be in excruciating pain and marks.

Sissie:
Balance is key.

Their are stages, their are extremes.

Accidents occur, doesn't mean a child is a bully, beating your children doesn't mean they won't turn out to be bullies.

The grown up kids (grade Sch and secondary school) who bullied others the most, where those who were bullied at home too.

Using cane on a toddler is much, doesn't mean using cane on a child above 5 is too much.

There is child abuse, so many of us have normalized this.

Beating doesn't always = discipline.

Disciplining ones child is a must, disciplining a child can be done different ways.

Many of us have been abused and conditioned to see it as normal.

At a stage what they need is smacking (smacking is a form of beating) at another stage smacking won't do.

Using violence to stop violence doesn't always work.

Coldfeet:
You have comprehension issues.


Beat your toddler till they pass urine from their mouths and noses! It's how you are wired so no problem.

I pity the children you birth.

Raincolour:

Should it even get to this stage? No spoilt child should injure my child
Medical bill my foot. Train ur child not to injure or bully others please. I won't hear 'sorry I will pay medical bill'. I am not broke or destitute, madam. Hold your child well.

sassyangel1:


Y r u crying over spilled milk? Pls save ur breath n face ur front. No need to waste my time dilly dally wth u. All I knw is dt CHARITY BEGINS AT HOME! till ur child who u tink can bully oda kids n jst get punished meets an upper bully, no wahAla, we'll be hear waiting to console as sisters ( lollllzzzz.... Jst imagining the veins popping out of ur eyes). Yes, I'm d baddest momma liveth.

sassyangel1:


Ahhhhhh.. U can imagine! I don't even wana imagine meeting som1 like coldfeet telling me this and looking @ my child's swollen eyes (God forbid!!!!). Walai, blood must shed or my husband comes from his unit and hold me. I go craze!!!!