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I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? - Family (3) - Nairaland

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I'm Tired Of My Wife, What Do I Do? / I Beat My Husband Because He Orders Me Around, Woman Tells Court / "I Beat My Wife Everyday, Yet We Are The Best Couple On Earth" – Pastor Jackson (2) (3) (4)

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Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by Nobody: 10:50pm On Oct 23, 2017
This is so sad on no condition should anyone hit anyone
Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by odeyinugbolahan(m): 10:50pm On Oct 23, 2017
my brother!!! yours is still better.. i suffered more than that in my ex wife hand.. your hands are not tied as the questions you were asked; its just that one have to keep calm. we are all human being with blood flowing in our veins, everyone have anger limit..

my woman still goes about telling pple that i beat her up at little provocation! meanwhile it happen just twice even though she assaults me at least twice in a month and she refuse to mention the fact that she is the one that push me that far.. she packed out some 4months ago and i have my peace back even though i miss her small sha...

you are in great danger if you are not careful ..

4 Likes

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by mightyfacts: 10:51pm On Oct 23, 2017
OP, you need to quit the marriage but before you do that, have video evidence of what she does without her knowing.

That was how my uncle wife killed him in sleep with acid and pestle.

Then later called the police that they were attacked by armed robbers but unknown to her, my unless uncle had CCTV cameras installed everywhere possible.

It was when my uncle friend that installed the CCTV came with the police to check the video tapes kasala burst.

She later started begging, saying it was the devil, that she was hypothesized bla bla bla

Please OP act fast cause my uncle too was considering his 4 kids and his reputation but never knew what the wife was planning.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by Adaumunocha(f): 10:51pm On Oct 23, 2017
That's d problem of being to careful... You told her what she wanted and she pretended to fit right into the picture you desire...
You should have chilled a bit after that introduction...
The op village people really waited for him like

2 Likes

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by ariklawani(f): 10:51pm On Oct 23, 2017
If na u nko,I know your type.the story dey do u like,if Na u,u go finish her.

1 Like

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by komododragons: 10:51pm On Oct 23, 2017
wrongchoice:
COURTSHIP DAYS AND MY HATRED FOR WOMEN BEATERS
During our courtship days I have always reiterated my stand on men that do beat their wife. I was of the opinion that they are not lesser than a beast.
She is very quiet, she hardly finishes her words, and she was full of smile that my grandma named her “smiling smiling girl”. My family members were thanking God for me because of her gentle nature. She doesn’t have friends, she goes to church regularly. I went for her because I have seen a lot of unhappy homes and by all means I wanted to avoid such situation. Before her, I had seen many girls that I love and they equally love me too. I leave them immediately I see a sign of anger in them. So, I told her that all I wanted in my life was happiness and I will make sure I keep the home together and going smoothly in as much that happens.
She has her trust issues which I thought they were necessary and not out of control (that was my greatest mistake), but aggressiveness and hatred ,I never had that thought a bit. She didn’t even look it.

MY FIRST SHOCKER
After the introduction, she was eager for the wedding despite the fact that I hardly got employed in a small firm barely a year. We fixed the date and arrangements were going.
3 days before the wedding , I told my wife to-be that one of my friends promised to bring event ;ushers for our wedding just to add glamour to the day, she didn’t allow me to finish when she started shouting on top of her voice and with this kind of never seen before aggressiveness. I never saw such red eyes before in 2 years of our courtship and over 6 years as friends. She said my friends and I were bringing oloshos to sleep with for bash eve which I never even plan to have. Her argument wasn’t a concern but I never see her reacted that way. I cried and I knew I was in for a big trouble.

THE REAL SHOW


Fast forward to after wedding. To my surprise, before any argument she would hit me, sometimes slap just less than 2 months in the marriage. I discovered she has the strength of 3 men. We are talking about a lady that never misses any church program as a youth and when we moved to our new area , she became more popular than myself in the church. This went on for a while coupled with terrible issues that I would be taken one after the other.

THE DAY OF LESSON
There was this afternoon that an argument ensue base on (what I will share latter) , she took out knife, I collected it from her, she brought out fork I collected it from her, she resulted to my belt and she started beating me with it ,I didn’t even struggle with her just like before. She took her shoe hitting it on my head ,I didn’t even move, I wasn’t even angry self. She bite me on my shoulder and thumb which nearly had that finger off if not for quick medical attention. At this point a question flashed through my mind, “would this be how my live would be going?”. This woman may even ask me to lay flat to receive some lashes if I didn’t make attempt to stop her. I concluded that I have to do something. Then without any iota of anger in me. I raised my hand up and gave her 2 thunderous slaps across her face. She opened her mouth for complete 5 minutes she couldn’t close it. I knew she would be thinking she has over stepped her boundary. She started shouting that I have killed her and all sorts. People that never had me speak in that street for good one year I stayed their plus close to a year she has spent with me were aghast. Since that day many things changed for the worse. Though she stopped hitting me after that, except sometimes when she would push me against the wall and i get some bruises.
I later travelled home and my siblings were asking me if my hands were tied to my back while a woman was inflicting all these injuries on my body. They saw both the fresh ones and the old bruises. It was a very big issue that families, church members had to intervene. I can tell you since that day things had never remain the same again. It was the beginning of trouble and unhappy home.

My question is this? If you were in my position what would you have done differently?


you can check the previous post here
https://www.nairaland.com/4126638/how-wife-been-terrorizing-me
I'm disappointed in you angry

you didn't beat her very well! you should have break one or two bottle in here head

5 Likes

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by hollah123: 10:52pm On Oct 23, 2017
motun2017:
mheen. all dz marriage tales ehn. i don dey fear ooo. se i go marry sha. mheeen
like seriously I prefer baby mama parole with no drama cos I don't even think I can go back home after a hard days work n still meet a Lucifer called wife. this life self

2 Likes

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by maidaddy: 10:53pm On Oct 23, 2017
erm eskis Sir, your case is a matter of urgency, believe me that woman will continue to beat you till Jesus returns. Omo ayewo Gbera!

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by segneyukk(m): 10:53pm On Oct 23, 2017
Op....don't you think she's possesed by demons why such a change of character.it's not ordinary oo guy... why strength like 3 men ....pls approach a prophet to help u deliever her and also befor she's delivered pls b watchful oo..or just leav house for her before she kill u one night

2 Likes

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by Nobody: 10:54pm On Oct 23, 2017
lovelygurl:
I can't believe you are asking us for advice!!!

"Please people, my aggressive wife beats me, might even kill me one day, what should I do?"

Duuuuude! Ruuuuuuun!!!!

Do you want to wait till she gets pregnant and you have to deal with her for the rest of your life?

Better divorce sharp sharp before we read about your story on Nairaland "Aggressive woman beats husband to death"
Even with pregnancy or children, if he wants to Jaa. He can.

1 Like

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by discman2k2(m): 10:58pm On Oct 23, 2017
selflessmaya:


when ppl say never hit your wife, they mean never become the aggressor. what is happening to to you is domestic violence and your wife is abusing you emotionally and physically. you need to leave that woman fast. she's poison! don't try to change her, don't blame yourself for anything, just, cut her loose!

EDIT: so I just read the old article you included in the link, i change my mind. with more insight to this:
OP, I dont mean this in an insensitive way, your wife has some deep issues and must have suffered some intense psychological trauma to cause her to feel a lot of bitterness and act out in sadism when angry, the knife, the fork, hitting you with a shoe on your head and not stopping when you didnt even react!! this last one is a huge red light, something is really wrong with your wife, she loves to inflict pain and if her personality is as contrast as u say, that everyone thinks she's this sweet girl, then whatever is wrong with her runs really deep, it's not normal at all to keep hitting a person with a shoe on the head when they're not fighting back, she wants to hurt you, she wants u to feel pain.

I'm honestly convinced your wife has suffered sexual assault at an early age that led to a break in psyche, she's mastered suppressing her feelings, her nice girl act is not an 'act', she's actually that nice. but when she's angry, all the bitterness buried beneath the surface emerges and she finally deals with all the buried emotion in its magnitude, it overwhelms her and she wants to act out to hit something or punch a wall etc. when she's alone and unhappy, even when she lived with her parents, u really dont want to see/imagine what your wife does to and says to herself, this anger she shows you, she's lived with it for a long time, she's been her own victim till now when she made u her victim. there is nothing she has done to you that she hasn't done to herself times hundred.

if you choose to for better for worse it, find a psychiatrist or psychologist and go with your wife for counselling, your wife, with or without you will never change till she finally begins to work on whatever buried bitterness she's had to live with for years. try to get help together as a family or get a divorce if u would rather not go through it. it's really that simple, your wife will live with whatever has happened for the rest of her life but how she manages the accompanying emotions, her anger and abandonment issues can all be taken care of with a good psychologist and emotional support on your part. educate yourself on the topic of sexual assault and learn the necessary sensitivity training and triggers. counselling will teach you all this.

no, i'm not thinking too far, your wife ticks a lot of boxes:
-extra charming cos of distorted/low self image and need to be accepted
-her over-religiousness is for closure that she needs and like u said her prayers are always for her god to attack ppl for her. even her relationship with god isnt healthy, it's a coping mechanism. the idea of a protector that will attack on her behalf.
-she talks from 12am to 4am alone when you're asleep, OP, your wife is full of a lot of buried emotion, she really wants to talk to someone about something.
-despite being a nice girl, before you married her, she had no friends
-she's very quiet, hardly finishes her words (withdrawn personality, mastered suppresion)

you should never have raised your hands to hit this woman, when she froze for 5 minutes, it's not that she was thinking she overstepped her boundaries, she was actually coming back to her senses, when your wife gets angry, she loses her mind and forgets who she's dealing with. even worse when the person who angered her is male, she reacts with more venom cos subconsciously he represents her aggressor and she wants to hurt him to make him feel pain. she probably has conversations with herself and imagines herself confronting her abuser and being able to hurt him back and make him regret his actions and cries alone cos it's only in her imagination that she can deal with him. when a man makes her defensive in her personal space, she attacks. till u actually hit her, u just represented something that she has bad blood with and now you've added yourself to the list of men that have ruined her.
she has stopped hitting u cos she has buried the incident of the slaps too but OP, the same place it's buried is the same place her demons she's battling are buried, she wont touch you but when her bitterness surfaces when she's alone, this time you're one of her enemies. the resentment is growing and when she sees u, she's filled with such bitterness she shoves u. if u do not intend to fix this marriage OP, walk away NOW. a lot of bitterness is brewing in this woman and if you add yourself to the list, we will read about u in the news the day this woman snaps. the same way u never saw her eyes so red the day she yelled, u will never believe she has it in her to go the extent she'll go, your wife will surprise you.

nigeria does not have a good support system for ppl who have had to deal with the trauma of sexual assault, society takes it lightly too but this is 2017, ppl should educate themselves on this, when we read here everyday '6 yr old girl raped in lagos by 43 yr old man', that girl is someone's future wife and she will NOT just be like everybody else, the scars of her trauma will show one way or another and she'll need extra sensitivity cos she's a "special" case. your wife is not a naturally aggressive person, that i can tell u and it's sad that another human being created this monster in her. OP, this is really not your battle, it's not you she wants to fight, you did not give her all the bitterness she's carrying, so let the slaps u gave her be the last, you wife is a very very bitter scorned woman whose hurt has taken years and years to germinate, the person who hurt her isnt dealing with it, u are. if u add to her bitterness and it gets too much, the person who created 99% of this mess will not be the scapegoat, again it will be u. i haven't dealt with sexual assault personally or with a family member but i have met closely with some of the victims and the effects of sexual assault are too underestimated. ppl should be killed for damaging another human like that.

if u do choose to save your marriage:
apologize profusely for hitting her and become super sweet, if u choose to undo this mess, u have to be ready, sensitive, patient, very educated about this issue and strong for the both of u. if u choose to walk this path, u will watch her fall apart and u have to be ready to help her reassemble.
don't let her hit you, hold her hands and keep holding it and talking to her till she calms down. your wife is actually a very sweet person, the person you knew her to be when u married her exists, just buried under layers of bitterness. i dont blame u at all for hitting her, there's nothing illogical in hitting someone who came at u with a knife, i can understand why u snapped but let it be the last time. your wife wants to talk to you, listen to her, she talks when you sleep, when you leave she follows you, it's annoying but it's her subconscious, she really wants to reach out. listen to your wife! make out time and let her rant, she will talk about so many things, no matter how messed up it sounds, keep listening. then talk back about whatever and if she interrupts and tries to talk, let her talk, just listen. u can stop the midnight talks by changing it to day time. stop sleeping in your sitting room, move back to your bed.

when you're ready to make the move, try pulling it out of her, on top of your new sweetness, be extra extra sweet to her for the whole week like her sh!t dont stink, on a friday(so if she spills, you'll both have the weekend to grieve), make sure she's in a nice awww darling mood and when you're holding her, just brush by a conversation u heard at the office that made u really sick "about a dude that assaulted some teenage girl and how mad it makes you that men like that are still walking around breathing and if they ever dared it with someone u care about, u'll deal with them and how no matter what she was wearing or where she was, no one has the right on another person's body without consent and the worst part is there are girls out there who have experienced this and told no one and the animal didnt get caught"
stay on the topic of sexual assault and follow body language, dont change the topic, be gentle, when she cracks, try to get her to talk, say what u have to "she can tell u anything, u wont judge, u love her from here to japan, if it affects her it affects you, u are both one and she can confide in u etc" when she talks, encourage her to keep talking, show that you're listening, console her all you can, cry with her even if u have to force the tears though i doubt you'll have to force them, make her see that whatever sunken place she's in, you've somehow gotten there too but dont cry more than her haba. tell her that both of u will go for counselling together, find a good therapist and go with her till she makes progress to go alone. make sure u find a therapist before u try to get her to talk about this and once she talks, the upcoming monday, begin therapy. and dont expect to work this out in 2 days, give yourself time like 4-6wks to build the emotional environment of trust and zero judgement to be able to access her when the time comes. note: she has to open up to you before you can go for therapy.

-u can expect her to go into depression for a while, she might need anti-depressants, sleeping pills too, she will be dealing with a lot of emotion once she finally lets someone in.
-NEVER EVER make a joke about her incident or say something mean to her about it... NEVER EVER!!! NEVER EVER!!! I MEAN IT OP.
-if u want to divorce her and not work through this, which is honestly the easy way out for you, then pls dont bring up anything i just told u here, dont taunt her over this, dont ask her about abuse or anything, just let the marriage end and pretend u didnt even read this. she will still live with herself so she has it heavy already.

i really do sympathize with you, u have found yourself in a very unfortunate position and no decision u make will be easy. sadly enough, i feel sorry for your wife too, she's really lived her hell and she's putting you through it. both of u dont deserve this. i also applaud you for all the grace you've shown, it's very hard to break the cycle of abuse, abused ppl mostly pass it on to others, maybe not in the form they received it but they leave their mark, so i can imagine how strong a person u were to endure all the emotional & physical abuse. and no, slapping her back was not abuse, u defended yourself full stop! dont feel sorry for yourself, just do what u have to do: stay & do the work to mend this if u can or leave if u cant.
u have to accept that your wife has issues that cause aggression when it flares. in time, u will also notice she's protective of children or animals or things she pictures as defenseless, it'll show in her mothering, not wanting your kid to go out, being too clingy to the child, convinced the big bad world is out to get her child, all that u will both work t
hrough in due time. once you can get your wife to show you the dark place she's in, it'll not be her safe place anymore, she can't hide there anymore, whatever comes to surface will be dealt with by both of you and u will finally live with the smiling smiling girl u married. good luck OP
s a

WOW! I VE BEEN A NATURAL PSYCHOLOGIST THAT I CAN PSYCHO ANALYSE U WITHIN 3O MINUTES OF MEETING & TALKING WT U, BUH I MUST SAY, I HAVEN'T MET SOMEONE WHO HAS RICH KNOWLEDGE ABT CERTAIN HUMAN BEHAVIOR COMPONENT AS U JUST DISPLAYED IN UR ANALYSIS OF THIS LADY IN QUESTION.

YOU DID DILLY DALLY WT CERTAIN ASSUMPTIONS, BUT, I MUST SAY U STILL WERE ABLE TO HIT BULLSEYE SO MANY TIMES, DEAR.

THIS IS TO ALL NATURAL PSYCHOLOGISTS, & T O THE WELL TRAINED ONES.

KUDOS DEAR, YOUR NOBEL PRIZE IS NOT TOO FAR AWAY.

12 Likes 2 Shares

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by Adaumunocha(f): 10:58pm On Oct 23, 2017
anishoff:
Do not beat her. Two wrongs don't make a right. Sit her down and talk to her about the issue intensively and also go for series of counselling and finally pray about d issue fervently and i can assure u the problem will stop because there is nothing God cannot do.
I pray for God to give u the grace to hold and control urself completely.
It is well
Talk? Pray? Until d op dies of frustration? Op please leave the woman! No one came into this world to die untop another person's evil nature. What rubbish! Its obvious she's psychologically unbalanced. The op might go crazy and eventually die off if he continues like this..... I know what I'm saying. Let's b rational sometimes.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by ariklawani(f): 10:59pm On Oct 23, 2017
Brother,sorry oo.u don patently enter one chance.I always tell people to seek knowledge, wisdom(pray) before choosing a life partner.is very important.
Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by ariklawani(f): 11:01pm On Oct 23, 2017
Smiling, smiling girl.u be mumu ooo.never judge a book by the cover.

1 Like

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by ariklawani(f): 11:01pm On Oct 23, 2017
Smiling, smiling girl.u be mumu ooo.
Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by gregyboy(m): 11:02pm On Oct 23, 2017
anishoff:
Do not beat her. Two wrongs don't make a right. Sit her down and talk to her about the issue intensively and also go for series of counselling and finally pray about d issue fervently and i can assure u the problem will stop because there is nothing God cannot do.
I pray for God to give u the grace to hold and control urself completely.
It is well

the preacher who preached. most of you dislike ur advice wen d situation occurs to. you just like a guy in schl den he gives d best advice but wen it comes to his he pays deaf to all...And wat dis guy did was right. two slaps was enuff as for me i can bring d devils in a persons out wen i need it .so nobody can pretend bhind me , i keep everydetails of words spoken to pple in my head and they play repeatedly untill i get a meaning to explain it so wen i get is fishy i do d needfull

1 Like

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by Nobody: 11:02pm On Oct 23, 2017
COURTSHIP DAYS AND MY HATRED FOR WOMEN BEATERS
During our courtship days I have always reiterated my stand on men that do beat their wife. I was of the opinion that they are not lesser than a beast.
She is very quiet, she hardly finishes her words, and she was full of smile that my grandma named her “smiling smiling girl”. My family members were thanking God for me because of her gentle nature. She doesn’t have friends, she goes to church regularly. I went for her because I have seen a lot of unhappy homes and by all means I wanted to avoid such situation. Before her, I had seen many girls that I love and they equally love me too. I leave them immediately I see a sign of anger in them. So, I told her that all I wanted in my life was happiness and I will make sure I keep the home together and going smoothly in as much that happens.
She has her trust issues which I thought they were necessary and not out of control (that was my greatest mistake), but aggressiveness and hatred ,I never had that thought a bit. She didn’t even look it.

Dat ur mistake man, Going to church does not equal good character/ born again. The devil goes to church too. Remember in the book of Job: When the sons of God gather, satan also came in their midst. Im not saying dat ur wife is a devil. Just a warning against what u wrote.
But Jesus said: u will kno them by their fruit. Not by their gathering to church.
Anyway, there is a hopen Jesus as long as you want to make ur marriage works. God can do everything.
Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by greggng: 11:02pm On Oct 23, 2017
men that beat women are animals no justification for that. The best approach is to walk away out of the marriage if you consider her actions unacceptable not by beating her. Go and fight boko haram or jushua if you are looking for a fight

1 Like

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by ovanda(m): 11:02pm On Oct 23, 2017
wrongchoice:
COURTSHIP DAYS AND MY HATRED FOR WOMEN BEATERS
During our courtship days I have always reiterated my stand on men that do beat their wife. I was of the opinion that they are not lesser than a beast.
She is very quiet, she hardly finishes her words, and she was full of smile that my grandma named her “smiling smiling girl”. My family members were thanking God for me because of her gentle nature. She doesn’t have friends, she goes to church regularly. I went for her because I have seen a lot of unhappy homes and by all means I wanted to avoid such situation. Before her, I had seen many girls that I love and they equally love me too. I leave them immediately I see a sign of anger in them. So, I told her that all I wanted in my life was happiness and I will make sure I keep the home together and going smoothly in as much that happens.
She has her trust issues which I thought they were necessary and not out of control (that was my greatest mistake), but aggressiveness and hatred ,I never had that thought a bit. She didn’t even look it.

MY FIRST SHOCKER
After the introduction, she was eager for the wedding despite the fact that I hardly got employed in a small firm barely a year. We fixed the date and arrangements were going.
3 days before the wedding , I told my wife to-be that one of my friends promised to bring event ;ushers for our wedding just to add glamour to the day, she didn’t allow me to finish when she started shouting on top of her voice and with this kind of never seen before aggressiveness. I never saw such red eyes before in 2 years of our courtship and over 6 years as friends. She said my friends and I were bringing oloshos to sleep with for bash eve which I never even plan to have. Her argument wasn’t a concern but I never see her reacted that way. I cried and I knew I was in for a big trouble.

THE REAL SHOW


Fast forward to after wedding. To my surprise, before any argument she would hit me, sometimes slap just less than 2 months in the marriage. I discovered she has the strength of 3 men. We are talking about a lady that never misses any church program as a youth and when we moved to our new area , she became more popular than myself in the church. This went on for a while coupled with terrible issues that I would be taken one after the other.

THE DAY OF LESSON
There was this afternoon that an argument ensue base on (what I will share latter) , she took out knife, I collected it from her, she brought out fork I collected it from her, she resulted to my belt and she started beating me with it ,I didn’t even struggle with her just like before. She took her shoe hitting it on my head ,I didn’t even move, I wasn’t even angry self. She bite me on my shoulder and thumb which nearly had that finger off if not for quick medical attention. At this point a question flashed through my mind, “would this be how my live would be going?”. This woman may even ask me to lay flat to receive some lashes if I didn’t make attempt to stop her. I concluded that I have to do something. Then without any iota of anger in me. I raised my hand up and gave her 2 thunderous slaps across her face. She opened her mouth for complete 5 minutes she couldn’t close it. I knew she would be thinking she has over stepped her boundary. She started shouting that I have killed her and all sorts. People that never had me speak in that street for good one year I stayed their plus close to a year she has spent with me were aghast. Since that day many things changed for the worse. Though she stopped hitting me after that, except sometimes when she would push me against the wall and i get some bruises.
I later travelled home and my siblings were asking me if my hands were tied to my back while a woman was inflicting all these injuries on my body. They saw both the fresh ones and the old bruises. It was a very big issue that families, church members had to intervene. I can tell you since that day things had never remain the same again. It was the beginning of trouble and unhappy home.

My question is this? If you were in my position what would you have done differently?


you can check the previous post here
https://www.nairaland.com/4126638/how-wife-been-terrorizing-me
Bro,I am in a similar situation but I can't go into details now. Just like u,I use to have this impression that men who beat up their wives are worse than animals but bro, the truth is that these women can drive u to point of madness. They can be so stupid and unreasonable. I have repeatedly warned my girl friend that my red line is raising voices and creating scenes in my flat but she has done worse than these. Right now,I don't stay in my house anymore,I rented a self con somewhere I always retire any time her madness starts. Na she dey beg make I come most times. Some even said I rented a room where I take girls to,but mennn,I don't care. Let them say!!

4 Likes

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by talk2percy(m): 11:03pm On Oct 23, 2017
All these holier than thou and Mary-like looking girls, honestly I no trust them...can u imagine, bros, what u are in is simply called "highway to the grave" two things are involved in this ur marriage, it's either she shortens ur lifespan or makes u die young. Divorce her and don't give a heck about what people will say including ur church.

2 Likes

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by Nobody: 11:04pm On Oct 23, 2017
What is this one saying?
daveP:
why are thorough signs seen days to the wedding alway ignored by both sides? bugging question.


and these ladies plenty for market sha... the all men are beaters crew are simply viewing. if he punch now, you'l see epistles longer than the book of Psalms.
Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by Adaumunocha(f): 11:04pm On Oct 23, 2017
@selflessmaya how come she never showed any signs of such aggression during courtship? Could she b a sociopath? You know they are capable to looking normal and then switching personalities. What's the way forward? Should d op take her to a shrink?

I'm actually feeling bad for the Op
Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by nnamdiosu(m): 11:05pm On Oct 23, 2017
Bro, I'll go straight to the point. Apart from the fact that I know that u too have ur own issues (no one is perfect), and u didn't point urs out, (in issues like this, no side is 100% right), I'll just talk from the aspect of ur side is right.
1. First of all something is wrong somewhere. A sheep doesn't just turn into a wolf over night. Either it was a wolf that wore sheep clothing to decieve or. .it was a wolf all along but the other sheep didn't notice becos of euphoria of love that mislead it(I say this with utmost respect to u sir). Bottom line is...something was wrong somewhere.

2. For solutions sake, I'll say the little I know from the little wisdom and experience I have. You have to think. As in...really think hard. Is there someone she respects? Pastor, church department head (since she loves going there?), her parents (you never talked about their side in this matter), her close friends etc. She surely must be loyal to someone. U need to seek help from the person.

3. Truth is...regardless of the best solution given on this forum, only God can deliver you from this situation. This definitely is not normal. Either someone is manipulating her physically (by giving bad advice), or spiritually. (some women were cursed never to remain in their husband's house. Is she from such a family?)
You need to seek the face of God in prayers, it might seem like a foolish idea but....only God can deliver you from this predicament.

4. Pls ensure u don't go physical on her. If needs be, leave the house for her. Trust me, initially YOU SAID U SLAPPED HER WITHOUT ANGER BUT THE DEVIL IS ON NAIRALAND AND READ THAT. THE NEXT TIME, you'll BE surprised HE would HAVE PUSHED U TO ACT OUT OF ANGER.

REGARDLESS OF ALL that HAS BEEN SAID, IT CAN STILL turn OUT TO PRAISE. don't GIVE UP. don't BLAME URSELF. NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE TO GOD. I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST. ITS GONNA BE ALL RIGHT.

2 Likes

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by Lanceslot(m): 11:05pm On Oct 23, 2017
I've got no time for stupidity or strength to hit a woman. If she messes up like get violent in any form, then I'm done with her.

1 Like

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by ncoolsome(m): 11:05pm On Oct 23, 2017
I swear she would love rough sex...

1 Like

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by mickeymimi: 11:05pm On Oct 23, 2017
seek counselling first ..........both of you with her pastors ....call family meeting ..........if that doesn't work
best option is to part ways for some time and if children are involved .........come to an arrangement on how to see them and be part of their lives too.

It is better to break your own heart by leaving an abusive relationship, ...............................rather than having that person breaking your heart every day.

dont let your story be ...she put you through hell......and you called it love.....because you failed to see something is bad ...or got out too late ..... ,,,,,until it completely destroyed you....

she will turn you into a woman beater .......if you dont take a break from her.....separation for a while doesn't mean you stopped loving each other....it is just time to reflect and understand the depth of your love .....she might change , seek help or continue like that .

marriage and children doesn't mean you are inseparable .....your happiness is a great gift to your children.

1 Like

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by Adaumunocha(f): 11:07pm On Oct 23, 2017
komododragons:
I'm disappointed in you angry

you didn't beat her very well! you should have break one or two bottle in here head
The op is wise, one real blow and the woman might drop dead and the op's life will go to d dogs.... So its better he calculates a safe way out of the mess.
Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by daveP(m): 11:09pm On Oct 23, 2017
Alexbox:
What is this one saying?
Calmly swerve to ma left if english now looks like chinese to you. nansense
Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by irofulu(f): 11:09pm On Oct 23, 2017
hmmmm na wha ooo am short of words.....
Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by Nobody: 11:09pm On Oct 23, 2017
Don't you know the registry you guys married? Go and divorce her, it's either one day she kills you or you kill her out of anger. Divorce her, if you can't, I can do it for you. Na wetin sef. Get married they say, it would be nice they said.

1 Like

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by Karleb(m): 11:09pm On Oct 23, 2017
I don't understand, someone was hurting and you did not do anything about it until you could take it no more?

Who does that?! angry

2 Likes

Re: I Beat My Wife. What Would You Have Done Differently In My Situation? by kodded(m): 11:09pm On Oct 23, 2017
singing fela song




I no be gentleman at all

I none gentleman at all at all

I be Africa man original












be acting like a gentleman until we hear of a woman stabbing her husband to death in nairaland




wetin concern me jare undecided

2 Likes

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