LancelLogan:
I have chronic OCD coupled with other mental issues like ADHD, chronic depression, extreme anxiety, bipolar, Low self-esteem, Perfectionism(OCPD similar to OCD) and the Fantasy Disorder (i waste hours fantasizing about a character rich fantasy world i have created in my head for almost a decade now) and (i don't know) i think i'm autistic... It kills me inside... I have contemplated suicide but i'm afraid it will be too painful or unsuccessful (since firearms are not sold in this country)...

My mental issues started when i was around 5 years (or maybe since child birth)... My depression heightened during my secondary education at a military secondary school (Nigerian Navy Port Harcourt).

I stay in Port Harcourt and school in the University of Port Harcourt (Uniport)... I'm repeating my final year because my mental issues did not allow me focus on my project and two difficult Maths courses.. i find it hard to focus (ADHD) and study... If i am not battling with that ever present inner OCD voice, I'm fantasizing about another world inside my head...

Everybody thinks i'm rude because i am never smiling and i don't know how to talk to or reply people (I'm always anxious even when i'm familiar with the person trying to talk to me)... no matter how i try i will always say something awkward or I wouldn't be able to say anything at all (my heart will always seem to be racing and my speech stuttering)... So i just detach myself from people generally to save myself from embarrassment...

What my OCD and OCPD has obsessed and compelled me to do over the years is just so much i can't write all about it here... It's more than the regular "wash your hand before and after you touch anything if not you will be infected or fall sick" or "if you press the wrong letter while typing a document, you must clear the whole page and start again if not the document file will be corrupted"]... If ever i try to resist the OCD voice, I'll feel so uncomfortable, anxious, disturbed and drowsy... i won't be able to concentrate on anything at all...

Also, it has made me abusive to my younger brother... If he does something I(or the OCD rather) don't(doesn't) like ... Example, if he doesn't wash his hand before touching things in our room or doesn't follow a couple of sequence i normally carry out while cleaning our room... i get so angry, i yell or sometimes(rarely though) physically abuse him... Any little thing he does irritates me even if he is just playing music, making a call or even laughing at a joke he read on his phone... This makes me hate myself but i can't stop this behavior...

Side note:[I have nothing against Christians or religious people... Please, don't be offended] I recently stop believing in religion (Christianity in my case)... I see it as a mechanism implemented to make people behave and make people be motivated to live and enjoy life... I also don't identify as an atheist because most atheist these days are just religious about their non-believe... They will undoubtedly support theories like The Big Bang Theory and yet criticizes Christians for believing in the Creation Story... I don't believe both of the aforementioned theories(stories)... I can say I'm agnostic because i do not know about the origin of existence.. Although, when i was still an ardent Christian, my OCD voice will compel me to give large portions of my personal savings to "God" so that i'll receive a specific blessing or answer to a prayer request... lol...

I have not talked to anyone about my issues because i know they will not understand... during my secondary school days, i told my parents i was contemplating suicide... they beat me up and took me to church for deliverance... lol... so there is no point talking about it to my family...


I will appreciate talking to someone who understands... Please reply or email me...

Thanks...

I do not know if Nigeria has facilities for people with such special mental ability. But hey, if you can, get help from a professional therapist.

If you can't, read about it and how to manage it.

Do you know why you are depressed? Is there a trigger for this depression?

Get a real friend.

LancelLogan:
I have chronic OCD coupled with other mental issues like ADHD, chronic depression, extreme anxiety, bipolar, Low self-esteem, Perfectionism(OCPD similar to OCD) and the Fantasy Disorder (i waste hours fantasizing about a character rich fantasy world i have created in my head for almost a decade now) and (i don't know) i think i'm autistic... It kills me inside... I have contemplated suicide but i'm afraid it will be too painful or unsuccessful (since firearms are not sold in this country)...

My mental issues started when i was around 5 years (or maybe since child birth)... My depression heightened during my secondary education at a military secondary school (Nigerian Navy Port Harcourt).

I stay in Port Harcourt and school in the University of Port Harcourt (Uniport)... I'm repeating my final year because my mental issues did not allow me focus on my project and two difficult Maths courses.. i find it hard to focus (ADHD) and study... If i am not battling with that ever present inner OCD voice, I'm fantasizing about another world inside my head...

Everybody thinks i'm rude because i am never smiling and i don't know how to talk to or reply people (I'm always anxious even when i'm familiar with the person trying to talk to me)... no matter how i try i will always say something awkward or I wouldn't be able to say anything at all (my heart will always seem to be racing and my speech stuttering)... So i just detach myself from people generally to save myself from embarrassment...

What my OCD and OCPD has obsessed and compelled me to do over the years is just so much i can't write all about it here... It's more than the regular "wash your hand before and after you touch anything if not you will be infected or fall sick" or "if you press the wrong letter while typing a document, you must clear the whole page and start again if not the document file will be corrupted"]... If ever i try to resist the OCD voice, I'll feel so uncomfortable, anxious, disturbed and drowsy... i won't be able to concentrate on anything at all...

Also, it has made me abusive to my younger brother... If he does something I(or the OCD rather) don't(doesn't) like ... Example, if he doesn't wash his hand before touching things in our room or doesn't follow a couple of sequence i normally carry out while cleaning our room... i get so angry, i yell or sometimes(rarely though) physically abuse him... Any little thing he does irritates me even if he is just playing music, making a call or even laughing at a joke he read on his phone... This makes me hate myself but i can't stop this behavior...

Side note:[I have nothing against Christians or religious people... Please, don't be offended] I recently stop believing in religion (Christianity in my case)... I see it as a mechanism implemented to make people behave and make people be motivated to live and enjoy life... I also don't identify as an atheist because most atheist these days are just religious about their non-believe... They will undoubtedly support theories like The Big Bang Theory and yet criticizes Christians for believing in the Creation Story... I don't believe both of the aforementioned theories(stories)... I can say I'm agnostic because i do not know about the origin of existence.. Although, when i was still an ardent Christian, my OCD voice will compel me to give large portions of my personal savings to "God" so that i'll receive a specific blessing or answer to a prayer request... lol...

I have not talked to anyone about my issues because i know they will not understand... during my secondary school days, i told my parents i was contemplating suicide... they beat me up and took me to church for deliverance... lol... so there is no point talking about it to my family...


I will appreciate talking to someone who understands... Please reply or email me...

Thanks...

So sorry

I'm coming

LancelLogan:
I have chronic OCD coupled with other mental issues like ADHD, chronic depression, extreme anxiety, bipolar, Low self-esteem, Perfectionism(OCPD similar to OCD) and the Fantasy Disorder (i waste hours fantasizing about a character rich fantasy world i have created in my head for almost a decade now) and (i don't know) i think i'm autistic... It kills me inside... I have contemplated suicide but i'm afraid it will be too painful or unsuccessful (since firearms are not sold in this country)....

Thanks...

You need PsyChrist my brother, no other permanent solution.

All these things you are diagnosing yourself with are not unique to you, a lot of Nigerians suffer these things, the fact you have admitted you may suffer from these things makes you saner than you think.
Take the advice of the first poster.

Nawa ooo bros Satan carry sit,sit well for ur life its only God that can help u,accept him as ur lord and personal saviour he will do all things he will break all breakables in your life,u will be made new like a new born seriously take my advise and make d devil a lair

So you diagnosed yourself of all this? Nice one!

Op, I will like to ask you what thing you actually enjoy doing very much.

Have you identified it/them?

LancelLogan:

pol23:
Hospital.
Drink.
Smoke.
Sex.
Walk
Football
Cinema.
Swim.
Sex.
Pray.

.
UR TIME TABLE?

LancelLogan:
I have chronic OCD coupled with other mental issues like ADHD, chronic depression, extreme anxiety, bipolar, Low self-esteem, Perfectionism(OCPD similar to OCD) and the Fantasy Disorder (i waste hours fantasizing about a character rich fantasy world i have created in my head for almost a decade now) and (i don't know) i think i'm autistic... It kills me inside... I have contemplated suicide but i'm afraid it will be too painful or unsuccessful (since firearms are not sold in this country)...

My mental issues started when i was around 5 years (or maybe since child birth)... My depression heightened during my secondary education at a military secondary school (Nigerian Navy Port Harcourt).

I stay in Port Harcourt and school in the University of Port Harcourt (Uniport)... I'm repeating my final year because my mental issues did not allow me focus on my project and two difficult Maths courses.. i find it hard to focus (ADHD) and study... If i am not battling with that ever present inner OCD voice, I'm fantasizing about another world inside my head...

Everybody thinks i'm rude because i am never smiling and i don't know how to talk to or reply people (I'm always anxious even when i'm familiar with the person trying to talk to me)... no matter how i try i will always say something awkward or I wouldn't be able to say anything at all (my heart will always seem to be racing and my speech stuttering)... So i just detach myself from people generally to save myself from embarrassment...

What my OCD and OCPD has obsessed and compelled me to do over the years is just so much i can't write all about it here... It's more than the regular "wash your hand before and after you touch anything if not you will be infected or fall sick" or "if you press the wrong letter while typing a document, you must clear the whole page and start again if not the document file will be corrupted"]... If ever i try to resist the OCD voice, I'll feel so uncomfortable, anxious, disturbed and drowsy... i won't be able to concentrate on anything at all...

Also, it has made me abusive to my younger brother... If he does something I(or the OCD rather) don't(doesn't) like ... Example, if he doesn't wash his hand before touching things in our room or doesn't follow a couple of sequence i normally carry out while cleaning our room... i get so angry, i yell or sometimes(rarely though) physically abuse him... Any little thing he does irritates me even if he is just playing music, making a call or even laughing at a joke he read on his phone... This makes me hate myself but i can't stop this behavior...

Side note:[I have nothing against Christians or religious people... Please, don't be offended] I recently stop believing in religion (Christianity in my case)... I see it as a mechanism implemented to make people behave and make people be motivated to live and enjoy life... I also don't identify as an atheist because most atheist these days are just religious about their non-believe... They will undoubtedly support theories like The Big Bang Theory and yet criticizes Christians for believing in the Creation Story... I don't believe both of the aforementioned theories(stories)... I can say I'm agnostic because i do not know about the origin of existence.. Although, when i was still an ardent Christian, my OCD voice will compel me to give large portions of my personal savings to "God" so that i'll receive a specific blessing or answer to a prayer request... lol...

I have not talked to anyone about my issues because i know they will not understand... during my secondary school days, i told my parents i was contemplating suicide... they beat me up and took me to church for deliverance... lol... so there is no point talking about it to my family...


I will appreciate talking to someone who understands... Please reply or email me...

Thanks...

my dear you are normal being with good spirit, your spirit can't involve in unclean environment, but you need to socialise and always use this word each time you see someone working in wrong way. man is imperfect. all these will fall in places if you get involve to people,gist,talk,play with them. then you will be healed faster

queenfav:
So you diagnosed yourself of all this? Nice one!

You dey mind them....everybody tossing labels left and right.....even the ones that need help themselves....

Oblongata:
I had similar issues once, but my brother would have none of it

What you need bro is to socialise

Very often

Even against your will

You also need a steady babe

With whom your world revolves

Go to social events

Church, mosque etc

Read lot of novels

Then best of all; write a novel about your fantasy

Goodluck.

steady babe ke? What if theybreak up don't you know it would affect him psychologically??

mu brother nothing is wrong with you, is just that you are carried away by your thought and and the same time weak.
this few tips will heal u.
1. dont think with your back brain. it does not make u live d present rather it makes u live on past. think with d front brain. althoug u may feel unintelligent, see thats d natural way to lived
2. just be strong. my brother u are too weak, see if u are talking to your mate and your heart want to pulled let it pulled. ofcourse it will not pulled. u are trying to control everything that happened to u e.g u dont want people to see u are shy, true or false? is ok to be shy.

3.dont masturbate.

Bro...to put it simple...you need a life. Oblongata has said it..... you need to socialize. You write pretty well... showing that ehmmm..... not everything in your head scatta.... as yet... but if you continue it eventually will and you'll become a full time mad man.You cannot live in your own world... man is not programmed to live that way.... and maybe that's why voices be entering your head. Never too late. I get it...you can't approach nor get into conversations at this point.... but start being around people...like going to watch a football game... a football match where you don't have to be in conversations...but yet be socializing because you are part of the crowd. You will eventually get used to people and be dropping comments and engaged in discussions without even realizing it. To stay all by yourself will do more harm... more voices will enter and soon you will be replying to those voices...then the world will know... a new mad man enta market. Socialize..your problem will fade away. My layman's opinion.

meaning of ocd

my brother nothing is wrong with you, is just that you are carried away by your thought and and at the same time weak.
this few tips will heal u.
1. dont think with your back brain. it does not make u live d present rather it makes u live on past. think with d front brain. althoug u may feel unintelligent, see thats d natural way to lived
2. just be strong. my brother u are too weak, see if u are talking to your mate and your heart want to pulled let it pulled. ofcourse it will not pulled. u are trying to control everything that happened to u e.g u dont want people to see u are shy, true or false? is ok to be shy.

3.dont masturbate.

God help you bro. Don't think of suicide. I can say i somewhat know how you feel.
Stay more around friends and positive energy/vibes.
Talk more to people.
I know you're suffering inside and think life is stressful but i can say there's God bcus i felt him and try to learn about Islam you'll surely find peace.
Your life is currently on a trial and at the end of the tunnel you'll share your story again about how you were depressed and all. Salam.

Blackfyre:


You dey mind them....everybody tossing labels left and right.....even the ones that need help themselves....

D matter tire me o.. This is the downside of readiing too much foreign psychological thriller books.

Oblongata:
I had similar issues once, but my brother would have none of it

What you need bro is to socialise

Very often

Even against your will

You also need a steady babe

With whom your world revolves

Go to social events

Church, mosque etc

Read lot of novels

Then best of all; write a novel about your fantasy

Goodluck.

Steady babe in whom his world revolves? I'm afraid that's not a good idea. He can have a steady babe but he shouldn't ever make his world revolve around her, because when she eventually breaks his heart (which happens 93% of the time), he'll definitely commit suicide or kill himself .

LancelLogan:
I have chronic OCD coupled with other mental issues like ADHD, chronic depression, extreme anxiety, bipolar, Low self-esteem, Perfectionism(OCPD similar to OCD) and the Fantasy Disorder (i waste hours fantasizing about a character rich fantasy world i have created in my head for almost a decade now) and (i don't know) i think i'm autistic... It kills me inside... I have contemplated suicide but i'm afraid it will be too painful or unsuccessful (since firearms are not sold in this country)...

My mental issues started when i was around 5 years (or maybe since child birth)... My depression heightened during my secondary education at a military secondary school (Nigerian Navy Port Harcourt).

I stay in Port Harcourt and school in the University of Port Harcourt (Uniport)... I'm repeating my final year because my mental issues did not allow me focus on my project and two difficult Maths courses.. i find it hard to focus (ADHD) and study... If i am not battling with that ever present inner OCD voice, I'm fantasizing about another world inside my head...

Everybody thinks i'm rude because i am never smiling and i don't know how to talk to or reply people (I'm always anxious even when i'm familiar with the person trying to talk to me)... no matter how i try i will always say something awkward or I wouldn't be able to say anything at all (my heart will always seem to be racing and my speech stuttering)... So i just detach myself from people generally to save myself from embarrassment...

What my OCD and OCPD has obsessed and compelled me to do over the years is just so much i can't write all about it here... It's more than the regular "wash your hand before and after you touch anything if not you will be infected or fall sick" or "if you press the wrong letter while typing a document, you must clear the whole page and start again if not the document file will be corrupted"]... If ever i try to resist the OCD voice, I'll feel so uncomfortable, anxious, disturbed and drowsy... i won't be able to concentrate on anything at all...

Also, it has made me abusive to my younger brother... If he does something I(or the OCD rather) don't(doesn't) like ... Example, if he doesn't wash his hand before touching things in our room or doesn't follow a couple of sequence i normally carry out while cleaning our room... i get so angry, i yell or sometimes(rarely though) physically abuse him... Any little thing he does irritates me even if he is just playing music, making a call or even laughing at a joke he read on his phone... This makes me hate myself but i can't stop this behavior...

Side note:[I have nothing against Christians or religious people... Please, don't be offended] I recently stop believing in religion (Christianity in my case)... I see it as a mechanism implemented to make people behave and make people be motivated to live and enjoy life... I also don't identify as an atheist because most atheist these days are just religious about their non-believe... They will undoubtedly support theories like The Big Bang Theory and yet criticizes Christians for believing in the Creation Story... I don't believe both of the aforementioned theories(stories)... I can say I'm agnostic because i do not know about the origin of existence.. Although, when i was still an ardent Christian, my OCD voice will compel me to give large portions of my personal savings to "God" so that i'll receive a specific blessing or answer to a prayer request... lol...

I have not talked to anyone about my issues because i know they will not understand... during my secondary school days, i told my parents i was contemplating suicide... they beat me up and took me to church for deliverance... lol... so there is no point talking about it to my family...


I will appreciate talking to someone who understands... Please reply or email me...

Thanks...

Jeez I thought u were talking about me ooo, its a sickness am really sick

Blackfyre:


We need to send him to sambisa ASAP!...

Must u joke with everything?

queenfav:
D matter tire me o.. This is the downside of readiing too much foreign psychological thriller books.

Lol....as a fact though....a low self esteem person will never type all that about himself.....it will be too much weight disparaging oneself in that manner....


But hey.....Country dey bore people....one has to relief his boredom somehow....

Sexyolori:

Must u joke with everything?

Yes ma....btw....olori come born obalola for me na...

Go and meet TB joshua for deliverance.

iomoge2:
Chia
I feel for you
Wish i can help or atleast be your friend

Here goes a wonderful solution

People who have the real OCD don't even know they have it, for them its just a lifestyle and attitude, but i also realize that those who say they have it , do not have it, they are just folks who often look for excuses or something beyond their control to blame for their shitty attitudes.

@LancelLogan

You are not alone, I just had an episode I was sure of committing suicide few minutes ago, I even wrote a suicide note.

Am living in pain, misery and depression and nobody seems to notice, instead, they complain am not who they want me to be

I couldn't go through with the suicide because of fear of failure. Sometimes, I wish I could get hit by a bullet because I want the death to be quick and painless.

LancelLogan:
I have chronic OCD coupled with other mental issues like ADHD, chronic depression, extreme anxiety, bipolar, Low self-esteem, Perfectionism(OCPD similar to OCD) and the Fantasy Disorder (i waste hours fantasizing about a character rich fantasy world i have created in my head for almost a decade now) and (i don't know) i think i'm autistic... It kills me inside... I have contemplated suicide but i'm afraid it will be too painful or unsuccessful (since firearms are not sold in this country)...

My mental issues started when i was around 5 years (or maybe since child birth)... My depression heightened during my secondary education at a military secondary school (Nigerian Navy Port Harcourt).

I stay in Port Harcourt and school in the University of Port Harcourt (Uniport)... I'm repeating my final year because my mental issues did not allow me focus on my project and two difficult Maths courses.. i find it hard to focus (ADHD) and study... If i am not battling with that ever present inner OCD voice, I'm fantasizing about another world inside my head...

Everybody thinks i'm rude because i am never smiling and i don't know how to talk to or reply people (I'm always anxious even when i'm familiar with the person trying to talk to me)... no matter how i try i will always say something awkward or I wouldn't be able to say anything at all (my heart will always seem to be racing and my speech stuttering)... So i just detach myself from people generally to save myself from embarrassment...

What my OCD and OCPD has obsessed and compelled me to do over the years is just so much i can't write all about it here... It's more than the regular "wash your hand before and after you touch anything if not you will be infected or fall sick" or "if you press the wrong letter while typing a document, you must clear the whole page and start again if not the document file will be corrupted"]... If ever i try to resist the OCD voice, I'll feel so uncomfortable, anxious, disturbed and drowsy... i won't be able to concentrate on anything at all...

Also, it has made me abusive to my younger brother... If he does something I(or the OCD rather) don't(doesn't) like ... Example, if he doesn't wash his hand before touching things in our room or doesn't follow a couple of sequence i normally carry out while cleaning our room... i get so angry, i yell or sometimes(rarely though) physically abuse him... Any little thing he does irritates me even if he is just playing music, making a call or even laughing at a joke he read on his phone... This makes me hate myself but i can't stop this behavior...

Side note:[I have nothing against Christians or religious people... Please, don't be offended] I recently stop believing in religion (Christianity in my case)... I see it as a mechanism implemented to make people behave and make people be motivated to live and enjoy life... I also don't identify as an atheist because most atheist these days are just religious about their non-believe... They will undoubtedly support theories like The Big Bang Theory and yet criticizes Christians for believing in the Creation Story... I don't believe both of the aforementioned theories(stories)... I can say I'm agnostic because i do not know about the origin of existence.. Although, when i was still an ardent Christian, my OCD voice will compel me to give large portions of my personal savings to "God" so that i'll receive a specific blessing or answer to a prayer request... lol...

I have not talked to anyone about my issues because i know they will not understand... during my secondary school days, i told my parents i was contemplating suicide... they beat me up and took me to church for deliverance... lol... so there is no point talking about it to my family...


I will appreciate talking to someone who understands... Please reply or email me...

Thanks...

I will dissect you thus: you have been reading much into Psychology. You indulged in self-diagnosis. If Hitler had won, you will be judged a misfit to live. Focus on what matters and heal yourself from within. You appear over-pampered as many people ate going through financial hell with little time to run a self-psychological diagnosis. I do not respect priviledged people. Ask for the price of sniper as we wont miss you on Nairaland.

LancelLogan:
I have chronic OCD coupled with other mental issues like ADHD, chronic depression, extreme anxiety, bipolar, Low self-esteem, Perfectionism(OCPD similar to OCD) and the Fantasy Disorder (i waste hours fantasizing about a character rich fantasy world i have created in my head for almost a decade now) and (i don't know) i think i'm autistic... It kills me inside... I have contemplated suicide but i'm afraid it will be too painful or unsuccessful (since firearms are not sold in this country)...

My mental issues started when i was around 5 years (or maybe since child birth)... My depression heightened during my secondary education at a military secondary school (Nigerian Navy Port Harcourt).

I stay in Port Harcourt and school in the University of Port Harcourt (Uniport)... I'm repeating my final year because my mental issues did not allow me focus on my project and two difficult Maths courses.. i find it hard to focus (ADHD) and study... If i am not battling with that ever present inner OCD voice, I'm fantasizing about another world inside my head...

Everybody thinks i'm rude because i am never smiling and i don't know how to talk to or reply people (I'm always anxious even when i'm familiar with the person trying to talk to me)... no matter how i try i will always say something awkward or I wouldn't be able to say anything at all (my heart will always seem to be racing and my speech stuttering)... So i just detach myself from people generally to save myself from embarrassment...

What my OCD and OCPD has obsessed and compelled me to do over the years is just so much i can't write all about it here... It's more than the regular "wash your hand before and after you touch anything if not you will be infected or fall sick" or "if you press the wrong letter while typing a document, you must clear the whole page and start again if not the document file will be corrupted"]... If ever i try to resist the OCD voice, I'll feel so uncomfortable, anxious, disturbed and drowsy... i won't be able to concentrate on anything at all...

Also, it has made me abusive to my younger brother... If he does something I(or the OCD rather) don't(doesn't) like ... Example, if he doesn't wash his hand before touching things in our room or doesn't follow a couple of sequence i normally carry out while cleaning our room... i get so angry, i yell or sometimes(rarely though) physically abuse him... Any little thing he does irritates me even if he is just playing music, making a call or even laughing at a joke he read on his phone... This makes me hate myself but i can't stop this behavior...

Side note:[I have nothing against Christians or religious people... Please, don't be offended] I recently stop believing in religion (Christianity in my case)... I see it as a mechanism implemented to make people behave and make people be motivated to live and enjoy life... I also don't identify as an atheist because most atheist these days are just religious about their non-believe... They will undoubtedly support theories like The Big Bang Theory and yet criticizes Christians for believing in the Creation Story... I don't believe both of the aforementioned theories(stories)... I can say I'm agnostic because i do not know about the origin of existence.. Although, when i was still an ardent Christian, my OCD voice will compel me to give large portions of my personal savings to "God" so that i'll receive a specific blessing or answer to a prayer request... lol...

I have not talked to anyone about my issues because i know they will not understand... during my secondary school days, i told my parents i was contemplating suicide... they beat me up and took me to church for deliverance... lol... so there is no point talking about it to my family...


I will appreciate talking to someone who understands... Please reply or email me...

Thanks...

LancelLogan:
I have chronic OCD coupled with other mental issues like ADHD, chronic depression, extreme anxiety, bipolar, Low self-esteem, Perfectionism(OCPD similar to OCD) and the Fantasy Disorder (i waste hours fantasizing about a character rich fantasy world i have created in my head for almost a decade now) and (i don't know) i think i'm autistic... It kills me inside... I have contemplated suicide but i'm afraid it will be too painful or unsuccessful (since firearms are not sold in this country)...

My mental issues started when i was around 5 years (or maybe since child birth)... My depression heightened during my secondary education at a military secondary school (Nigerian Navy Port Harcourt).

I stay in Port Harcourt and school in the University of Port Harcourt (Uniport)... I'm repeating my final year because my mental issues did not allow me focus on my project and two difficult Maths courses.. i find it hard to focus (ADHD) and study... If i am not battling with that ever present inner OCD voice, I'm fantasizing about another world inside my head...

Everybody thinks i'm rude because i am never smiling and i don't know how to talk to or reply people (I'm always anxious even when i'm familiar with the person trying to talk to me)... no matter how i try i will always say something awkward or I wouldn't be able to say anything at all (my heart will always seem to be racing and my speech stuttering)... So i just detach myself from people generally to save myself from embarrassment...

What my OCD and OCPD has obsessed and compelled me to do over the years is just so much i can't write all about it here... It's more than the regular "wash your hand before and after you touch anything if not you will be infected or fall sick" or "if you press the wrong letter while typing a document, you must clear the whole page and start again if not the document file will be corrupted"]... If ever i try to resist the OCD voice, I'll feel so uncomfortable, anxious, disturbed and drowsy... i won't be able to concentrate on anything at all...

Also, it has made me abusive to my younger brother... If he does something I(or the OCD rather) don't(doesn't) like ... Example, if he doesn't wash his hand before touching things in our room or doesn't follow a couple of sequence i normally carry out while cleaning our room... i get so angry, i yell or sometimes(rarely though) physically abuse him... Any little thing he does irritates me even if he is just playing music, making a call or even laughing at a joke he read on his phone... This makes me hate myself but i can't stop this behavior...

Side note:[I have nothing against Christians or religious people... Please, don't be offended] I recently stop believing in religion (Christianity in my case)... I see it as a mechanism implemented to make people behave and make people be motivated to live and enjoy life... I also don't identify as an atheist because most atheist these days are just religious about their non-believe... They will undoubtedly support theories like The Big Bang Theory and yet criticizes Christians for believing in the Creation Story... I don't believe both of the aforementioned theories(stories)... I can say I'm agnostic because i do not know about the origin of existence.. Although, when i was still an ardent Christian, my OCD voice will compel me to give large portions of my personal savings to "God" so that i'll receive a specific blessing or answer to a prayer request... lol...

I have not talked to anyone about my issues because i know they will not understand... during my secondary school days, i told my parents i was contemplating suicide... they beat me up and took me to church for deliverance... lol... so there is no point talking about it to my family...


I will appreciate talking to someone who understands... Please reply or email me...

Thanks...

I will dissect you thus: you have been reading much into Psychology. You indulged in self-diagnosis. If Hitler had won, you will be judged a misfit to live. Focus on what matters and heal yourself from within. You appear over-pampered as many people are going through financial hell with little time to run a self-psychological diagnosis. I do not respect priviledged people. Ask for the price of sniper as we wont miss you on Nairaland.

LancelLogan:
I have chronic OCD coupled with other mental issues like ADHD, chronic depression, extreme anxiety, bipolar, Low self-esteem, Perfectionism(OCPD similar to OCD) and the Fantasy Disorder (i waste hours fantasizing about a character rich fantasy world i have created in my head for almost a decade now) and (i don't know) i think i'm autistic... It kills me inside... I have contemplated suicide but i'm afraid it will be too painful or unsuccessful (since firearms are not sold in this country)...

My mental issues started when i was around 5 years (or maybe since child birth)... My depression heightened during my secondary education at a military secondary school (Nigerian Navy Port Harcourt).

I stay in Port Harcourt and school in the University of Port Harcourt (Uniport)... I'm repeating my final year because my mental issues did not allow me focus on my project and two difficult Maths courses.. i find it hard to focus (ADHD) and study... If i am not battling with that ever present inner OCD voice, I'm fantasizing about another world inside my head...

Everybody thinks i'm rude because i am never smiling and i don't know how to talk to or reply people (I'm always anxious even when i'm familiar with the person trying to talk to me)... no matter how i try i will always say something awkward or I wouldn't be able to say anything at all (my heart will always seem to be racing and my speech stuttering)... So i just detach myself from people generally to save myself from embarrassment...

What my OCD and OCPD has obsessed and compelled me to do over the years is just so much i can't write all about it here... It's more than the regular "wash your hand before and after you touch anything if not you will be infected or fall sick" or "if you press the wrong letter while typing a document, you must clear the whole page and start again if not the document file will be corrupted"]... If ever i try to resist the OCD voice, I'll feel so uncomfortable, anxious, disturbed and drowsy... i won't be able to concentrate on anything at all...

Also, it has made me abusive to my younger brother... If he does something I(or the OCD rather) don't(doesn't) like ... Example, if he doesn't wash his hand before touching things in our room or doesn't follow a couple of sequence i normally carry out while cleaning our room... i get so angry, i yell or sometimes(rarely though) physically abuse him... Any little thing he does irritates me even if he is just playing music, making a call or even laughing at a joke he read on his phone... This makes me hate myself but i can't stop this behavior...

Side note:[I have nothing against Christians or religious people... Please, don't be offended] I recently stop believing in religion (Christianity in my case)... I see it as a mechanism implemented to make people behave and make people be motivated to live and enjoy life... I also don't identify as an atheist because most atheist these days are just religious about their non-believe... They will undoubtedly support theories like The Big Bang Theory and yet criticizes Christians for believing in the Creation Story... I don't believe both of the aforementioned theories(stories)... I can say I'm agnostic because i do not know about the origin of existence.. Although, when i was still an ardent Christian, my OCD voice will compel me to give large portions of my personal savings to "God" so that i'll receive a specific blessing or answer to a prayer request... lol...

I have not talked to anyone about my issues because i know they will not understand... during my secondary school days, i told my parents i was contemplating suicide... they beat me up and took me to church for deliverance... lol... so there is no point talking about it to my family...


I will appreciate talking to someone who understands... Please reply or email me...

Thanks...

Please send me a hi on whatsapp via +233 0242255465. Let's talk.

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Oblongata:
I had similar issues once, but my brother would have none of it

What you need bro is to socialise

Very often

Even against your will

You also need a steady babe

With whom your world revolves

Go to social events

Church, mosque etc

Read lot of novels

Then best of all; write a novel about your fantasy

Goodluck.

Thank you...