₦airaland Forum

cstr1000:
That is a very terrible advise.

You Do not forgive a cheating wife. That is a cardinal law.
It takes a lot for a wife to cheat, and when she does, it means she has crossed a rubicon- a point of no return.
She has no respect, love or fear for him, and it will take a miracle for it to be restored. Romance cannot restore it. It is an inbuilt something that is introduced from courtship into marriage and when lost, cannot be regained.

If you decide to forgive, then it should be with a realization that it can happen again and you just want the marriage to continue irregardless.

I understand what you mean sir, but sometimes generalization doesn’t really work....


Ok what about if a man cheat on his wife..... will you advise her to forgive him and give him a 2nd try?

True but not t

betafuture:
I am very sorry, it seems like anytime I post on Nairaland is actually the time I have great challenges in my life, however, my posts also reflect the chronicle of my life. You may wish to check out my last posting about how I was sacked in the Bank with a debt that was guaranteed by a junior staff, whose job was threatened by the loan I obtained and she guaranteed for me. please find the link https://www.nairaland.com/2282140/loan-incured-before-termination-appointment Like I mentioned in that post, I got a job as with a Rep member and he appointed me as the Special assistant on a salary of 80k monthly and my boss paid my rent, of which I engage with my lender to take 50k with me monthly and right off the excess interest and stop disturbing the junior colleague, an arrangement they agreed to and everybody was fine, save that I had to struggle to cope with 30k monthly as a family man, working in Abuja. My wife never complained. I just gave her 25k from the salary, once received, to buy food for the family why I tried to manage with the remaining 5k. It was tough! Luckily, a junior lady cousin who works in a bank was posted to Abuja and we had to accommodate her. She was very kind and understood my plight. Sometimes, she drops up to 50k for my wife to augment the house expenses. She would tell me and sometimes, I would take additional 10k to ad to my pocket money.

The home was running, my son, my wife and my cousin, including myself were very happy. As a banker, I had learned the skill of marketing and networking and negotiation. In the course of my sojourn in the national assembly I met a head of a parastatal wjo needed me to do some strategic alliance between his organization and my boss. We later became great friends, and i realized I could access a scholarship to study in the UK through him. To cut the story short, I pursued this opportunity to the latter and I got a Federal government scholarship to pursue a Masters degree in the UK. I saw this as an opportunity to rewrite the story of my life. Two months in the UK, I began to look for means to bring my wife and son to join me in the UK. While I was in UK, I made it a point of duty to send 150k to my wife in Nigeria on monthly basis (Remember I was on scholarship) and I also do student work in the UK. Because we did not sell our car during the crisis, I also gave the custody of the car to her.

FIRST SUSPICION

When she was about coming to the UK with my 7 years old son, we decided to give out some of our home appliances and sell most of them including the car. Since I was not in Nigeria, she was to manage the transactions. Because I opened her e-mail address, i do see her mails, so i could see the alert on her GTB. The first thing that prompted me was that the amount she received for the sales of our car was 100k higher than what she declared to me. (The fund was meant to buy the flight tickets for her and my son). There were other expense transactions that were over declared, but the actual amount debited to her account were quite low. I did not confront her on these issues until she arrived UK with my son. When I did, I could see the way she manipulatively and professionally lied her way out of the whole issue. I did not pick an offense, hence i made her to understand that I was never convinced. Since then my instinct told me that if she could lie to me so much on finance, maybe there are other things going on in her life that I never known. However, I opened her Facebook account for her years ago in Nigeria, but I never bothered to check it. Out of curiosity, I tried login into her Facebook account and I discovered she has changed the password. My first reaction was to check it, but had I done that, she would have been conscious, then I used my skill as an trained IT security expert to crack her password and then access her Facebook. I ran through all her messenger message and everything was fine. Apart from a certain guy who always beg her for assistance and prayer, there was nothing really suspicious about her messanger and then, we continued with our normal life.

After a week in UK, she started to work as a carer (her visa permitted her to work fully), and she began to make money. I know how much enters her account and we decide how to spend. My son also start schooling and life began to have meaning again. I finished my masters with a distinction and the best graduating student in my department and my University offered me automatic admission for PhD, with part scholarship.l To remain, we needed to source funds to show evidence that my family can stay with me in the UK and show evidence of the balance of school fees. We sourced for money everywhere. She brought all she had and we had to borrow both from UK and Nigeria. My boss was very supportive and I commenced the PhD this September. As a family, we have a problem. My son is now 8 years and we have been trying to make another baby but it does not seem to be forthcoming. We have been to hospitals in the UK, we were both tested and once told my sperm motility was low, treated, but later we were considered both ok.

Since her arrival in the UK, I noticed that my wife suddenly repel sexxx. Sometimes, we had sexxxx just once in a month, she would find a way of brushing away by advances. At a level, i had to ask if there was any problem, but she said it was because of the new environment, her jobs and what have you. This further told me that all was not well in my marriage. She knows I love her and I would do anything for her. While we were yet trying to pay my tuition, her mum got a US visa and all the children were making contributions for her journey, I had to take from my school fees and send to Nigeria and manage my school to give us more time. I tried to ensure that we continually live like one happy family.

Do not let me sound like one perfect good guy. I had also lived a rough bad life in the past and she is aware. During my days in the bank, I had been sexually reckless and irresponsible. There was a time I left office to a gal house, fckked her and I never knew that the condom we used was stick to my shoe. I drove with it home, entered home very late at night, my wife was already angrily waiting for me in the house, only to see a used condom with sperm inside attached to the soul of my shoe. It was an issue that we had to battle with for weeks, even though I never confess it was from, I told a story that it must have got gummed to me at the mechanic village where I had gone to pick my car in the evening (She was aware that someone has accused my mechanic of having sexxx in his car, leaving condom at the back seat). after few weeks, we resolved the issue and we continued leaving normal life. However, there was also a time I suspected her activities on Facebook and I realised a guy whom she has known in the past has been pestering her and she seems to be encouraging him (That was during our period of financial crisis). I had confronted her, she had denied they never had anything but the guy was just pestering her. I apologised and went sober. I called the guy (who was also married) and lived in another faraway city. The guy denied having anything to do with her that she just knew her while growing up. The guy originally blasted me, but later called back and apologized and promised never to disturb her again. I was hurting for months, after which I forgave, forgot and moved on. Let me also state that during the period of my financial crisis, I made a covenant with God, after listening to a message, that whatever the case maybe, I will remain faithful to my wife. This I have manage to keep despite advances from both married and single friends and acquaintances.

THE REAL ISSUE

Now, we are living in the UK and very happy, she is working full-time, while I pursue my PhD full-time, work part-time and my son schools full-time and we were all happy, save the issue of delayed pregnancy and (to me, the poor sex life from her). Let me also state that I bought her a Samsung phone (when she arrived last year), which I have full access to because I know her password. Few months ago, she told me she wanted a bigger phone that she would send the one I bought her to my younger brother in Nigeria who had been disturbing her for a phone. Even though, I thought we did not need to spend money on a new phone at that crucial time because of the looming school expenses, I consented just for her to be happy and she got herself a Samsung galaxy s8 plus for 700pounds, which she would repay of 2 years. The first thing that prompted me about the phone was that she changed her password, but I never mind because I thought she was preventing my son, who always loved to play game on her phone from accessing the phone. However, after few weeks, I began to feel very uncomfortable about the whole stuff. My instinct just told me all was not well. Whatever was it, I could not place my finger on it. But after reviewing my work with my supervisor in the University yesterday, I just felt like going home to rest, instead of studying in the school and then, I met wife in the house with my son. She was trying to order some items online for my son for Christmas and on arrival, she gave her phone to select what we should buy for him, and then, the FB message came into her phone and I could read...'it is not what you think, I have been very busy'

I selected the item I thought was ok, gave returned her phone, picked my laptop and logged in to her Facebook. My wife pretended she was enganging me in discussion, but was responding to the message from a guy, who obviously was her lover and she wrote (I was reading from my computer without her knowledge) 'You know I will ALWAYS LOVE YOU'. and the other guy responded 'I love you more baby' (By this time, I was already burning on the seat, but I somehow managed to keep my calm). She wrote 'But you don't call me' ...and she stood up and went to the kitchen (I wanted to gather enough evidence before I reacted), but immediately she got to the kitchen, she deleted the conversation. At this time, I could not take it. My son was in the sitting room, watching cartoon. I went to her in the kitchen and aggressively confronted her. She originally pretended she did not know what I was saying, but when she say the aggression and seriousness in me she started begging and crying. I lost control of my emotion. I was angry and shouting. My son was there. He was too young, but very intelligent. he understood everything and began to blame his mum, at the same time asking me ti give mum a second chance. I was bitterly hurting. I felt like tearing her into pieces, but if I tried that in UK, it will be straight to jail. She could not state the reason behind her action. She was still trying to lie. She said the guy was her ex and they recently became friends on Facebook and the guy is trying to rekindle the old relationship. The guy is based in Nigeria, they do not even see. Everything she said was incoherently sense. All she wanted was that I should forgive her. I should not tell anybody. She cried, wept and what have you. I was hurting. If it were to by Nigeria, she would have left my house yesetrday, but in UK, it is difficult. The love turned to hatred. She managed to convince me to enter room with her, so that she will discuss the issue with me, without getting our son involved. In the room, it was the same crying and plea for forgiveness and a promise it would never happen again. I told her i was ok, but she would not let me out. I had to angrily shove her away from the door and she hit her head against the wardrobe. i was too angry, too sad, and too hateful to care. i called her all manners of unprintable names. I cursed her, I was just too angry. She kept begging. I left for the sitting room and she came back, knelt down before me and kept begging. My son was crying that two of us were making him sad. The young boy even threatened to tell his teacher in the school on monday. I was too angry to listen. I just told her to let me be. She stood up with tears in her eyes to enter the toilet, I checked her Facebook account again and realised that the lover had sent another message thus: "My dear I don't call you always to protect your home, but I always check your pictures every night before I go to bed" As I was reading, she stupidly deleted that again in the toilet. (Please note that my wife always post our family pictures on facebook, stating how I am the best husband in the world).

My anger erupted again and I rushed to meet her in the bathroom and asked her why she deleted the last message of the guy and she tearfully answered that she did not want me to see anything that could aggravate my anger the more. I angrily snatched the phone from her and smashed it on the floor. She knelt down at my feet and continued to cry and beg for forgiveness, but I was hurting so badly. I left for sitting room again and my son was confusedly crying. She came back and knelt before me and continued begging and weeping and begged we should go back to the room to discuss, at least to protect our son. After a while, i followed her. There was nothing to say; the same weeping, crying and promises to not do it again and swearing that they never had anything together. I told her I needed to talk to the guy and she pleaded I should not. I told her she is giving me an impression that she is protecting the guy so that she could continue her illicit affairs with him and told her it would not work. The can change tactics, but its is only a matter of time. I told her, I would forgive her, but I cannot trust her again and when there is no trust in marriage, the marriage is gone. I also told her I must engage that guy that she should give me his number, but she said her phone is no longer working. I made her feel comfortable that I have forgiven her, but honestly I am hurting. I went back to my laptop, continued chat with the guy on her messenger, but he was now online. We both slept on the same bed, i realised she could not sleep. In the middle of the night she woke me up to beg again, she was offering a make-up sexxx, but I was not interested. I told her i had forgiven her, but I am still hurting and there is no way i could have erection with her. In the morning, I checked her messanger, i discovered the iddiot has responded, still claiming to love her. I checked his profile, I realised he is a muslim, who has a wife with two kids. His location was not shown, but most of his pics her in Nigeria apart from two which have foreign background. I also realize he has limited posts on FB, but the phone number on his FB page is US phone number.

From my wife's FB account, I sent a message thus:

Hi, Mr Farouq, my name is Adams, I am Grace husband
I just wish to inform you that all the rubbish you have been doing with my wife are now exposed to me
I advise you in the name of whatever thing you believe, STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE.

I also realize you are a married man. If you have any moral integrity and respect for family values, you will know that
responsible men do not run after married women or break homes.

I do not care whatever you claim you think of her, just heed this warning STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE.

He read it an never respond. I went to her facebook setting and unfriended him.

I left home in the morning to go study in the library, but honestly, I could not assimilate anything. I am so emotionally broken down, so psychologically disturbed. The whole event kept playing in my head. I found it difficult to rationalise it. I continued to find fault in my being and my personality. I know I am very attractive handsome young man. Despite showing I am married, ladies still flock around me. I am also a passionate lovemaker. I dress well and look neat. I don't seem to understand where I have failed. Sometimes I just close my eyes and i feel tears dripping, but I have got to be strong. As for her, she has remained in the room since morning, hiding her head in shame and crying profusely. I have cut off communication with her since I came back from school and I have enganged myself in drinking spirit maybe my spirit will be strenghtened.

This is my story, this is my ordeal. Please I need advice.

Thanks.

I felt your pain brother. I will advice you to forgive her, forget the past and move on. Give her a chance. In this situation where your child started crying, if you didn't resolve it earlier it might have negative effects on your child. So, I will urge you to forgive her. Don't think about the past.

Note: Tell her not to move closer to anything like that in her life again.

Dear i understand you and how you fill, but let me advice u your home is your home, she beg for forgiveness i will ask you to forgive her, if not for anything but your son sake that boy dont need a broken home not now that he is too young it will affect him, so pls forgive your wife and make your home a happy home, i pray that God soften you hearth to forgive her, come to thing of it you have sin against her and lied before her, so as a sinner we all have sin in one way or the other and God forgive us, so forgive your wife too, God bless you as you forgive her.

if you can't deal with it move on to avoid stories.. once the trust is gone the love will surely find its way out of your heart

Placing myself in your shoes...The first thing I would have asked myself is where did I go wrong. Anger lies in the bosom of the fool,you smashing her head or destroying her phone is extremely wrong. Seat her down,have an heart to heart talk with your wife . It would interest you to know that she might just need someone to tell her how lovely she is and you were not just available to do that.
She has shown remorse. The best you can do is forgive and forget about the whole episode completely. Don't destroy a marriage of over 8 years on the excuse that you saw chats which ordinarily you were not meant to see. If I were you, I would conclude that the problem is from me and I will work on myself. Forgive yourself. Apologize to her for not being there. Get a commitment of her undying faithfulness to you and you guys should start living your life. And finally,like she said, you don't need to rant about it to any friend or member of her family. Don't destroy what you can salvage. I speak God's peace on your home. I see God renewing your love and granting you that Child you so desire.Forgive. Love her more. Leave God to do the rest.

bamisho:
See the height of hypocrisy

you cheated, she forgave you, now you're here ranting about what she did which is less that what you did.

Now you know how it hurts abi?

Let me give you the same advice people give women with cheating husbands

1. Go and apologize to her

2. Make sure you show her more love than ever

3. You must never nag

4. Get into shape and start dressing sexy. You should get some red boxers

Karma is a bitch isn't it

Do onto others as you want them to do to you.

Also according to Nigeria the man is the head and the woman the neck.

If the head is rotten surely the neck will rot too.

As the head you are the leader abi? So she the neck has simply taken her cue from the leader.

Be the change you want to see!

I'm sure he won't like this but this is d best advice here. Tho u didn't add that he should pray n fast until his wife changes, lol!

What is good for d goose is also good for d gander.

I like threads like dis where men cry foul.

Lorbar:
Op your story is as long as the book of Jude


Back to the topic, you should give her a second chance. If not for anything, for the sake of your son and the fact that she showed remorse.

Is the book of Jude very long

pattybf:
I'm sure he won't like this but this is d best advice here. Tho u didn't add that he should pray n fast until his wife changes, lol!

What is good for d goose is also good for d gander.

I like threads like dis where men cry foul.

I no Say na wetin go sweet una be this

Seun:
The fact that a married woman is banging some other dude doesn't mean that she wants her husband to leave her, which has serious financial and social implications for her and her children. The dude she is banging is unlikely to be husband material. She might be too old to be single.

Oro lenu agbalagbi

Enu agba lobi ti n gbo.

Ishilove:
Na wa o, see as story be like action feem

Omo ele bosenlo lori yen o

Ishilove:
Bloody hypocrite. You have cheated before but you lied professionally and thus weren't caught. Now she cheated emotionally (not even physically), and you are here raising the roof.

I[b]diot human being. You can dish it but you can't take it. You better forgive that woman otherwise the gods will strike you with elephantiasis of the scrotum[/b]

Chaiii

Ehh I Fear u o. Wobose won baba lepe

Ahh! Eru yin to ba o

betafuture:
hmm. Because I have cheated before now, it gives her the liberty to cheat under my roof. Ok ooo

Yes

dingbang:
But you cheated on her...even had sex with a girl...

And now your wife is just only chatting with someone else you are here boiling like molten magma ....


See God is not stupid ok... He has allowed the devil to come into your marriage which you started the adultery.. You are the one that needs to seek for mercy

He even has the nerve to open thread about it

betafuture:
Thanks for your perspective. I never see it from that angle

What kind of PhD are you getting with this your grammar?
Are you sure your story is not made up?
Best student in your class in the Uk too.

jendoakino:
I don't why people don't get this ,am not making excuses for men but the truth is that women cheats with emotions unlike men that can just have sex with no feelings attached .That's why when a woman cheats on her husband she finds it difficult to have sex with him unlike men

are you woman?
Another fool who thinks he knows what women feel and want

cococandy:
are you woman?
Another fool who thinks he knows what women feel and want

choi, what has happened to the Coco I know? These days, half of your comments are filled with arguements and malignant remarks.

cococandy:
He even has the nerve to open thread about it

very pathetic... People justifying adultery. They fail to read their Bible. God hates adultery so much it can send someone to hell within seconds..

romeorailss:
I no Say na wetin go sweet una be this

U can't imagine how sweet sef!

cococandy:
What kind of PhD are you getting with this your grammar? Are you sure your story is not made up? Best student in your class in the Uk too.

It's not by grammer oo.

pattybf:
U can't imagine how sweet sef!

E pain me sha

betafuture:
many thanks. But how do I know they never have anything together, I left her in Nigeria with my son for three months (though my cousin was in the house with her) before she came to join me in the UK. One thing that tourched me was that my son said 'Daddy, please give mummy a second chance, she is not a bad woman'

I felt like crying with that little boy's words

My dear brother: I don't want to add to your pain; the worst has happened. She definitely had sex with her lover before joining you. If you had played it cool, you definitely would have confirmed the worst. If it were me I wouldn't have confronted her just yet as patience and persistence would have made you confirm the extent to which she went. No desire for sex? Discrepancies in payments to her account??

Anyway, you can choose to heal for the sake of your son. But watch out: She will suddenly become overprotective of you with the passage of time, warding off any female she perceives as a 'threat'

Hozier:
choi, what has happened to the Coco I know? These days, half of your comments are filled with arguements and malignant remarks.

Saying that a married woman can cheat because her husband cheated is as good as saying she should jump into fire because her husband also jumped into fire. Today's African women's mindset has been westernised. What's worst is that they can never disclose their movements. It is only when they are caught that they are guilty.

If you give them a taste of their own medicine they would say you have poisoned them

1) Do not ever make the mistake of going back to your wife...Don't let this emotional blackmail in the comment section get to you ( like you were the first to cheat , so it is equal..nonsense).
2) Even if you forgive her just for argument sake...You will start cheating on her even more than before ( and you will feel justified in the act)...resentment will enter( it already is anyway).
3) Any woman that has the mind to cheat on her husband ..they never stop, they just become more extremely careful.Do not yield to her tears or whatever.
4) lastly, before you make a move on her( like divorce) make sure that wound you gave her is totally healed..because women are very vindictive and she will use it against you if you insist on walking away or fighting for the custody of your son and she will ( better believe that).
...........
the marriage is over , the sooner you accept it the better for you..if you make the mistake of going back to her , Your are just postponing the inevitable ( which would be more deadly)....but please whatever decision u take ..make sure you cater and take care of your little boy..

Fearcom:
My dear brother: I don't want to add to your pain; the worst has happened. She definitely had sex with her lover before joining you. If you had played it cool, you definitely would have confirmed the worst. If it were me I wouldn't have confronted her just yet as patience and persistence would have made you confirm the extent to which she went. No desire for sex? Discrepancies in payments to her account??

Anyway, you can choose to heal for the sake of your son. But watch out: She will suddenly become overprotective of you with the passage of time, warding off any female she perceives as a 'threat'

Worst u say?

It wasn't worst when he was sleeping around n lying ba? Which I know he's still doing anyways!

Bloody hypocrites everywhere!

Virus777:
My only concern was why she was denying you sex. There's more to that than meets the eye. Is it that her ex lover was a better love maker or what?

And when her secret affair was blown open, she now wanted to offer you the sex.

I wonder oo

Princedapace:
Brotherly, I must confess that this can be hurtful. I always say this that men feel more hurt when their partner cheat on them. This statement can not go down well with people who wants to equate everything in gender. This is all about mindset.

I know how hurt u feel now. But since she has been remorseful, try and forgive her. She has been crying and kelt down to beg u. This means she has not lost her love for u. Some would av moved out and ran away with their cheating partner. ur wife has shown that she can repent..

Here are what you can do:

forgive her.. not easy but with time, u would forgive.

Trust will die.. yes, I know, but with time, u would trust her again.

Thirdly, u need to make her comfortable and beliv u av forgiven her very well, take her out and let her open up to u on why she started such cheating act.. Let her tell u the truth. the reason for the cheating is more important here, this would be useful for both of u to prevent the issue from repeating again.

It could be an old friend she had chemistry with.. She should also open up on weda they av been seeing each other while she was in Nigeria. Becus for trust to start again, every atom of doubt and suspicion and hear-say must be cleared first.

When all these are sorted out, both of u should take a trip to another city for few nights and Bleep each other well..

finally, warn her and let her know that from the moment, u wouldnt allow her use her own password, etc. She should also improve on her sex life with u. Everything will be fine.. though u will never forget this act. That is the simple truth.

Bros, kai, nawa for you o.

A question for you

how can you tell if the woman is truly remorseful and regrets her actions and not just trying to stay in the marriage for now.

u need a much more deeper understanding of the true nature of a woman.

u said the woman could ve ran away with the guy and abandoned her marriage. That she stayed bcoz she still loves her hussy.

going by the husband's narration this is not likely to be true since he said the man in question is already married with kids and may be unwilling to abscond with her. And Frm the tone of conversation between the cheating woman and her boyfriend, it seems the boyfriend is even the reluctant party in the affair. More devastating is the fact that the woman was clearly begging for his attention.

2ndly, The hussy caught her red handed. Not like she went to confess her actions. So how can you tell if she's no longer still interested in the affair ?

These are the factors he needs to consider before he can forget and put everything behind him.

If a woman is in love with you then you will always ve an advantage whether she's married or not. And the hussy even said she's been exhibiting an indifferent disposition for sexxxx with him lately. And this is a testament to the fact that a good part of her might no longer be with him.

bros, u sound intelligent to me but plz don't be naive.

Acidosis:
ALL married men and women with at least one of two exes would at one point do what your wife has done.

You've done yours, she's done hers. Everyone is now fine, move on



If you think you can meet a woman that will never recount the good moments with her ex, then you're probably going to mold the woman yourself. Truth is all women at one point imagine and remember the good old days.

Simple and short...

Waoo, this quite painful, I must confess. I must also commend your great writing skill. I could see the picture, like I was seeing a movie in your word (even though one goat up there was saying rubbish about your grammar), intelligent people can identify great writers and story tellers when they see one.

Now to the issue on ground, I think I have great experience on this matter of married women rubbish. I am married too, but have lots of exs who are married. The way they disturb me for sexxx, is quite alarming. They do it with reckless abandon as their husbands have no ddiccks. It is just that I have a principle never to engage with another man's wife. Never. Not in this world, not in the one to come. I don't know the kind of devil that has entered into the ladies of nowadays. The can hardly be trusted and trust me, this social media thing is not helping matter. Well, depending on the guy in question, I cannot guarantee that the guy man has not been banging your wife. The probability is very high. From the narration, it appears it is even your wife who is throwing herself on the guy. The guy seems to be more interested in protecting your wife's home for her than she is willing to do for herself.

Honestly, I do not know how to advise you on this matter. Maybe you meet a counsellor for professional advice, but if it happened to me, my brother; that is the end of the marriage and my wife knows that. That a man bangs around does not give a gal the license to do same. A man can marry four women and stay in the same house with them and control all of them, but if a woman marries two husband at the same time, it is an aberration. A man can 4ck around and brag about it; when a lady begin to tell people that he bangs any man he sees, she becomes a dirty rag in the society. Even prostitutes are not proud of their profession. That is the reality. A woman who fuccks around can bring a bastard home, making the hubby to believe he is responsible for the baby, whereas one guyman outside is the real father, but if a man impregnates another lady outside, there is no way he can deceive the wife about the true maternity of the child. So, while we are not justifying men adultery, the truth is that women adultery is the greatest sin in the history of humanity; no wonder the Jews have a culture of stoning an adulteress to death, without doing anything to the man she committed the adultery with.

Brother, just do whatever you think is ok by you, but the future of your son is very critical. One love.

pattybf:
Worst u say?

It wasn't worst when he was sleeping around n lying ba? Which I know he's still doing anyways!

Bloody hypocrites everywhere!

Don't mind them...
They are all bloody hypocrites...
I won't be surprised if he's still fvcking around.
Men like op will be the first to cry foul when the table is being turned around.
Fvck them...

Imagine the poster above saying "That a man bangs around doesn't give a girl the license to do same"? God! women have really turned into a plaything in the hands of these creatures. Tufia

My dear, that guy is a great writer. I can see pictures in his words. Abeit, you sound quite frustrated. I hope you are ok.

cococandy:
What kind of PhD are you getting with this your grammar?
Are you sure your story is not made up?
Best student in your class in the Uk too.

THIS IS THE BALANCE OF EVIL OF THE BENEFITS OF THE INFORMATION AGE(unlimited access to peoples spouses,lovers etc via the internet)

Follow this rules BRO.

1. Forgive her she was only being human.
2. Be eagle eyed always.This is to help you forestall a potentially destructive extramarital affair on the part of your wife.
3.Women are by default susceptible to praises,attention,admiration,psyches et all.Understand this fact and make it your duty to protect your wife.
4.Tell her your Limits. Warn her, should it ever happen again,Assure her the result will be catastrophic.
5.You should have thrown a missile into that cheaters home too.Give him some rough waters to handle.if possible locate his spouse and hit Hard by exposing him or counter toast her.
6. Consistently Educate your wife never to think she could handle a man making Advances on her especially her ex.
7.Finally,show your wife you are the best man in the world.But won't take disrespectful stuffs like cheating.Living organisms will always move away from pain .Assure her what cheating will do and mean it.
8. A loving wife will behave.Anything else is hopeless.