kimbraa:
I've always had in mind that everyone has his/her definition of who a nice guy is. Op, from your definition I'd no interest in reading further.

ubunja:

yet you commented anyways..
attention-seeking much?
EDIT:
only a Nice Guy would give you a nice definition.
thats the whole aim of this post. to stop telling women what they want to hear. thats the job for Nice Guys.

kimbraa:
That my comment doesn't align with your post doesn't make me an attention seeker.

Don't ever think you've gotten women figured out with this crap you wrote.

ubunja:

and the great irony is that im talking about nice guys. not women.

kimbraa:
Nice guys/bad guys is an illusion. It's all in your heads 'cause we all know a nice/bad guy when we spot one.

ubunja:

so they are an illusion BUT you can spot them
why dont you take the next off ramp and go chill in other threads. u are clearly confused.
now people are wondering why a thread you claim is useless is consuming so much of your time

kimbraa:
That something is illusive doesn't necessarily mean it can't be identified. It's simply a misconception here 'cause virtually everyone has a definition of who a bad/good guy is which is wrong in most cases. Do help yourself with google.

NightHound:
Nice guys are created when parents instill proper values into their sons. When they teach them to value and respect people - women as well as men. When they teach them that denigrating another person does not make them taller or smarter or richer.

Nice guys aren't necessarily people pleasers. They give people respect when it is returned; and distance when it is not.

Many women may not appreciate nice guys early on in life; but eventually, when they learn to value themselves, they learn to appreciate someone who treats them right.

NightHound:
Nice guys are created when parents instill proper values into their sons. When they teach them to value and respect people - women as well as men. When they teach them that denigrating another person does not make them taller or smarter or richer.

Nice guys aren't necessarily people pleasers. They give people respect when it is returned; and distance when it is not.

Many women may not appreciate nice guys early on in life; but eventually, when they learn to value themselves, they learn to appreciate someone who treats them right.

pocohantas:


I didn't read the OP, I only read your post and it captured everything in few words. "Women don't appreciate nice guys, men don't appreciate good women"...but these same people are in good relationships and marriages.

It takes a nice person to value another, if a girl so fancies a bad guy, then she isn't good after all.

pocohantas:


I didn't read the OP, I only read your post and it captured everything in few words. "Women don't appreciate nice guys, men don't appreciate good women"...but these same people are in good relationships and marriages.

It takes a nice person to value another, if a girl so fancies a bad guy, then she isn't good after all.

ubunja:

you get it my brother. thats why i said Nice Guys excel in everything else.
Nice Guys only lose coz what excites women is the bad thing. just like Eve left good Adam to be charmed by the cunning serpent. its the same thing playing itself over and over again.
so the Nice Guy doesnt get the girls in the their 20s when they are freshest. but gets them as Leftovers when they hit 35. they finish last.
EDIT:
they arent people-pleasers but they are WOMEN-PLEASERS. thats why they populate friendzones. they dont understand that women are not forced to reward their goodness with sex. no woman is under any obligation to open her legs for you just coz u offered to be her shoulder to cry on.

ubunja:

the female equivalent of a Nice Guy is a Sl_ut NOT a good woman. a good woman is the equivalent of a player. you wouldnt understand.
and by the way i understand THE LESS NICE GUYS THE LESS FREE THINGS FOR YOU.thats why all you girls dont even want to read the post but are determined to make men not believe it
you are hillarious.

pocohantas:


I didn't read the OP, I only read your post and it captured everything in few words. "Women don't appreciate nice guys, men don't appreciate good women"...but these same people are in good relationships and marriages.

It takes a nice person to value another, if a girl so fancies a bad guy, then she isn't good after all.

pocohantas:


Maybe the women in your life are so used to collecting free things. I don't do freebies, I can't remember the last time I collected something from a man. I can't deal with the sense of entitlement and braggadocio that comes with it. Most men give not because they are so generous, but because it's an ego thing...something to make them feel superior, a God given mandate.

That said, the write-up is way too jam packed. Even guys might not read it, has nothing to do with women trying to make men not believe it. Except you're implying men are dummies with no brain of theirs.

The definition of a good guy is subjective, I have been with a few. My constant NL crush can be classified as a good guy, none of these guys are walkovers or people pleaser, being the stereotyped definition of a good guy.

The equivalent of a good guy can't be a slut, except you failed English language. Now you're talking antonyms, not synonyms.

ubunja:

dont worry yourself if u cant understand i will do a post soon on it.
and stop wasting energy on a Post not meant for you.
you are disturbing the Badboys being born

NightHound:

I couldn't agree more.

NightHound:


Lol! @ when they are freshest. No be meat o! For me, the beauty of a woman in her twenties is nothing but youth. It will fade quickly enough. But the beauty of a woman in her mid thirties and beyond is due to self-discipline and self-confidence. That's bound to last. I choose not to be deceived by youth; I might end up with a woman who hasn't learnt to keep herself up through good lifestyle choices. So, even if I get her at 35, that's no hardship.

I get the analogy with Eve and the serpent. It's apt, I think. But we are all seduced by the devil in one way or another. When we chase money over integrity, and foolishly compromise ourselves. In the end, we learn our lessons.

Women are still people. So when I said people-pleasers, I meant to include women as well. There is a difference between being nice and suffering low self esteem. If a nice guy wants to offer a girl a shoulder to cry on, there's nothing wrong with that if he's honestly there just to offer her comfort in her moment of distress. But where a guy has designs on a girl, and allows himself to be relegated in the background by this chick, hoping for crumbs from her table; that one is something else entirely. That's a guy who's got no value for himself.

pocohantas:


When you post on a forum like Nairaland, it becomes for all and it's not your duty to dictate who it's for. Learn to deal with counter arguments, you weren't expecting us all to nod in agreement. That's having in mind that humans have diverse views.

ubunja:

you have the ovaries to claim tolerance of views when u admit u skipped my post? are u even real right now
pocahontas u need to get a grip girl.

pocohantas:


Because it's bulky and too jam packed. You should consider spacing it. I skipped not because you ain't entitled to it. Two different things... you need the grip more dear, trust me, you do

ubunja:

im typing on a samsung maybe thats why format is sh!tty.
so my post is not entitled to your read but you are entitled to make a response on my post.

brothers do u see how selfish women are?
STOP BEING SIMPS ONCE AND FOR ALL

ubunja:

The Miseducations are too deep for you to disturb. just save your energy. you have no influence in this study group.

pocohantas:


K, e done do ahbeg.

NightHound:


Lol! @ when they are freshest. No be meat o! For me, the beauty of a woman in her twenties is nothing but youth. It will fade quickly enough. But the beauty of a woman in her mid thirties and beyond is due to self-discipline and self-confidence. That's bound to last. I choose not to be deceived by youth; I might end up with a woman who hasn't learnt to keep herself up through good lifestyle choices. So, even if I get her at 35, that's no hardship.

I get the analogy with Eve and the serpent. It's apt, I think. But we are all seduced by the devil in one way or another. When we chase money over integrity, and foolishly compromise ourselves. In the end, we learn our lessons.

Women are still people. So when I said people-pleasers, I meant to include women as well. There is a difference between being nice and suffering low self esteem. If a nice guy wants to offer a girl a shoulder to cry on, there's nothing wrong with that if he's honestly there just to offer her comfort in her moment of distress. But where a guy has designs on a girl, and allows himself to be relegated in the background by this chick, hoping for crumbs from her table; that one is something else entirely. That's a guy who's got no value for himself.

pocohantas:



Excellent. Two different people, one suffering low selfesteem, another is genuinely nice and very aware of any manipulative antics. Being nice isn't synonymous to low selfesteem, in my own POV.

ubunja:

if you dont have Quality Control why bother reading my Miseducations
they are called Miseducations for a reason. they are for a select few. just ignore the thread and save us all a day of useless arguements

ubunja:

your approvals and validations are the bait that work on Nice Guys. thats why you are offering them. thats how u control Nice Guys.some guys value to their heart what you say. and its OK. they are Nice Guys.

NightHound:



I don't understand......are people not allowed to air their views on this thread regarding the original post? I thought that's how Nairaland worked.

Here's an idea for the mods: there should be the option (available to users) of creating a topic to which people cannot reply. So that anyone who's arrogant enough to declare his write-up an incontrovertible treatise can use that option and count his 'likes' in peace, without dealing with the dissenting opinions that are bound to arise that could hurt his fragile ego.