₦airaland Forum

trustyshoess:
Life is simple. Since you want a maid for a wife, find a dependent submissive woman who's willing to be at your beck and call, cooking and slaving while you watch tv. There are many of them out there. Leave the independent women who refuse to do that alone! Afterall, you can't marry every woman so select the one that's right for you. These women will find men who understand them. Stop complaining

Nutase:
If you could put your writing prowess to good use you would have been a billionaire at 15. But no, you choose to write this type of sentimental shit which can't earn you a shekel.


Sorry.

amanikondo:
That is my wife. Very submissive and humble. She has PHD, MSC, BSC and she never schooled in Nigeria, good job and all these never get to her head. By the way, she is not my slave.

All I know is that Menopause no dey Pause.

RuthDaniels:
I respect real men! Honestly it's not easy being a man. Sometimes I look at my Father and say "Dad you are the best"!

That said! I think life would be much easier if both genders play their roles in each others lives without being compelled. And all genders should appreciate each other's effort without comparing who does more or better. After all we are made to complement another

gmoni2:
good..some of these folks are still in the 15th century..

Humility017:
this feminist thing has taken over you...to the extent that you could barely pass a reasonable message across....

trustyshoess:
It's not my fault if you can't decipher what I wrote. Don't blame your lack of comprehension on the fact that im a feminist, doesn't make sense

Intrepid01:
Your comments are always outstanding....I hope they are real....just look at a lady's comment above yours....she couldn't comprehend the whole article and based her response on the last paragraph...her sense of summary requires urgent attention.

Humility017:
better to lack comprehension than absolve that you manage to put up there...

the OP made sense...rather than contribute positively...you saw need to bring in the your feminist stance that made no sense...or abit related to the message....

mayorkyzo:
Being a man ain't easy...we hear so much about widows,but nobody cares about widowers...so much funds Is being poured into breast cancer research but next to nothing is done about prostrate cancer with almost equal mortality rate.. I think we need a men's rights group..

ijebuloaded:
Usually, I make up short posts about Entrepreneurship, Start-ups, Finance, Capital and that line of stuff. But I decided to put this up. Been a while I wrote a story or an article. I chose this topic because it's been on my mind. Enjoy. Share, dont copy.

I read alot of these 'Wife Not Maid", "Sharing House Chores With Wifey" posts on social media, and I think it is belittling of the role of the Man. Infact it is so uncalled for. I am an African man, I am the man of the house. If I decide to watch TV while you are making Amala, 'excuse you', better get used to it on time.

Top management at organizations do the least physical activities, but they do the most brain tasking and intellectual work. Same with all leaders, same with all husbands! Besides, who says men don't do house chores? In fact, we are stressed out, we feel over used, you wives make us feel like house boys in our own home (yet you will only give us 2 pieces of meat).

Read this scenario. Lagos couple wakes 4:30 on a weekday. Husband goes to start the generator, the metal cocoon doesn't come on. Still dizzy, Hubby gets down and fixes it, doing the job of a 'Gen repairer'. Wife calls out, 'Honey, I forgot to tell you last night that my car tire is flat, please help me replace it'. Honey goes to the car like a robot and does a "Vulcanizer's" job. While he is shaving, he notices the toilet washing hand basin has a leaking pipe, he gets down to it, and does a "plumber's" job.

Wife calls out while slicing onions, "Boo-boo, this onion thing is entering my eyes, come help me, sweets". Mr Boo-boo rushes over, and does the job of a "Mai-Suya". Wife complains, 'The knife is not sharp sef, help me file it once and for all', and so husband files the knife, doing the job of a 'Kponbe'. So Boo-boo and wife are ready to leave the house, and wife's car does'nt start, the battery is flat, it needs to be jump started! Wife cries out, hitting the steering wheel repeatedly, 'Baby, I hate this car, I so hate it, I am going crazy'. Husband in his nature doesn't complain, he goes over to her car to fix it, isn't that his job? Mr fixer! He rolls his sleeves, gets his strong arms to work, does the magic like the Hero he is. He just did the job of a 'Mechanic'.

Boo-boo is at an important meeting, trying his best to impress top management so he can get that promotion he hinted 'Wifey' about. With the promotion, he'd earn better, afford to change his wife's car and buy that land at Mowe. His phone rings during his presentation, his wife is calling. He ignores. He sees 17 missed calls from 'My World' the next time he checks. This may be a life and death matter, so to the surprise of his supervisor, he excuses himself and dashes out of the meeting. 'What is the matter dear?' he calls wife back.

'Baby, you need to be here right now. I have been insulted, harassed and I am loosing it', wife cries out to her man. 'Relax dear, what exactly is going on? Where are you?' husband enquires. 'While I was going to deliver a cake to a client at Costain, as I got to the traffic light at Surulere Stadium, I obeyed the sign and stopped. This unfortunate Danfo guy coming behind did not do same, instead the idiot ran into my car, the whole booth is so dented. He is neither remorseful nor apologetic. He is an ally of the Policemen around here, so they are supporting him, imagine o. Come oh, because I dont know what to do', wifey pours heart out.

11:47am. Boo-boo signs out at the receptionist desk, drives from his office at Chisco (Lekki) to meet wifey who is pulling one Agbero by the trouser at Surulere Stadium. On getting to the scene of the accident, he sees the colossal damage. He gets into a serious argument with the danfo driver, he throws a punch, and then began a fight. He must not let his wife down, not in the public, in front of a national stadium for that matter. Hero as he is, he beats the Danfo guy blue black till he was pulled away. He hires a cab, puts triumphant wife with her client's cake in it. He makes a turn and takes wife's car to a Mechanic at Palmgroove, boards a danfo back to Surulere to pick his car and heads back to Lekki. He gets back to the office by 3:43pm where a query from his supervisor was waiting on his desk.

Boo-boo gets home 9:47pm having fought his way through a hectic traffic that got the 3rd mainland bridge locked from 5:00pm to 8:15pm. As he arrives at their rented apartment at Alausa, he sinks into the sofa, eyes starring at the TV but mind busy recounting the ordeal of the day. Wife is busy preparing Eba and Efo riro. She arrived 1hour earlier. 'Boo-boo', she calls out but no response from the living room. She begins the usual long talk she is good at, giving a recount of how her day went. 'Honey imagine this...', 'Honey imagine that...', 'Iyabo is getting married', 'Guess who I saw', 'I saw one black gown today at..'

Her talking goes on from the kitchen for 30mins non stop, and after her epistle, all Boo-boo says is 'Where is my food woman?' So they both eat at 10:40pm and go to bed. No light in the toilet, Wifey can't go there alone in the dark. She visits the toilet 3 times between 11:00pm and midnight. Every time tapping hubby by the shoulder, 'Boo, I want to wee, come and follow me 'jhare', trust Boo-boo, he is always up to her demands. She taps Boo-boo on the shoulder at 1:15am, not to wee this time, 'Baby, I have been touching you since, you didn't even look at me. Where is our sex life going? You don't do me like you used to. I am worried. Is there some one outside? Tell me.' Boo-boo manages to give a smile but he ignores her. She starts sobbing. Boo-boo pulls her up on him, and mechanical activities begin, putting all the energies to work (Kinetic, Potential, name it.).

'Harder baby!', 'Harder baby!', 'Holy Heavens!', 'Open Heavens!', 'Make way, Make way, Part the red sea!!' was all Wifey was screaming till 2:00am as Boo-boo tries to satisfy her. And so after, they both fall into deep sleep. 2:30am, a big kick sends the door of the living room flying to hug the door of the kitchen, isn't romance in the air? Four armed robbers are in. Boo-boo jumps up from the bed, uses his palm to cover Wifey's mouth has screams. He carries her quietly and hides her, warning her to not make a single sound. Boo-boo walks into the living room to a grand reception of slaps, coming from opposite, adjacent and hypotenuse angles. 'Na you and who deh stay this lungu?', Ring leader asked in a life-threatening tone. 'Na na na nana only me sir', Boo-boo replies in a Baptist hymnal tune. Already weak from 4rounds of 'Harder baby', he receives serious beating from the robbers before they made away with all the money at home. All this while, Wifey was hidden behind Bathroom door as Boo-boo stood up to protect his home like he does always.

Boo-boo's life goes on like this every day. He is victimized, He is used, He is abused and belittled many times, but Boo-boo is not complaining. So Wifey, you open your stinking mouth to ask him to sweep, wash plate for you, or make moi-moi with you. Are you alright? Do you want to kill him? If he comes to assist you with chores on his own accord, that's nice and good. But if Chairman decides to cross legs and watch TV while you make 'ordinary semo' and stew in the kitchen, my sister, shut up your smelly mouth and do your job. This is Africa.


https://ijebuloaded.com/romance-husband-not-maid-dipor-exzie/

RuthDaniels:
Lol, We have different perspective of life, so don't be surprised to read different comments.

trustyshoess:
LMAO it's a public forum. I don't have to agree with the OP mate, I'm allowed to express my own opinion, which I did. If you read my reply carefully and without bias, you'll realise that I never even disagreed with the OP, rather what I'm saying basically is live and let live. Just because you know I'm a feminist and you hate feminism like most ignorant people do, you jumped into conclusion.
Ugh why am I even wasting my time?
Lol do/think what you want. Idc

Humility017:
you jumping to conclusion....mind you I don't hate feminists....
I only hate the tendency of any gender chauvinist to quickly jump to conclusion crying injustice and make use of any avenue to put start the gender superiority war...

I once told a friend of mine who is a feminist....that i will.be so elated and fulfilled if I sit to watch my wife make waves on the TV...
my wife success is not a threat to my success but rather....a blessing to me...

her success I will strive for and I celebrate wit her...I will want her be the best she can be...and attain goals she ever dreamt of.

mind you...many men out there share same dreams...and will never impede their wives progress.

bukatyne:
Your story is entertaining, I give you that.

Once a wife is working a full time job, she is carrying more than 70% of the home's weight.

There is only a semblance of balance when a wife is a stay at home wife with a fully providing husband.

Do wives as potrayed in your OP exist? I am sure they do. Have I encountered them? No.

Again, most of the chores are not even routine or how many times do you change a leaking faucet or a faulty gen?

I would agree with you that evetyone needs to appreciate their spouses more whether you think they are doing their duties or not.

Intrepid01:
Yea true....but the Nigerian definition of Feminism is the ability of a lady to initiate confrontation, exhibit over-confidence and show huge disrespect on every subject matter of discourse with a Man....just for self satisfaction, thinking antagonism is tantamount to Independence.

I know for years Men have lauded it over Women, as the Head of the House....but going overboard in a bit to correct the wrong notion isn't the way forward.

The truth is Men too do many things at home that are always over looked....but in the end I pray we all end up with people we share similar views on home management with...cos at that time the size of the boobs n yansh or size of the dick n pack of muscles won't matter anylonger....it will be a world of open realities...

I understand you perfectly. I've seen more than enough comments from some feminists on nairaland that sometimes make me question their sanity / humanity. But I have been made to realize that while some do not understand what feminism entails, some see it as a way to express their pent up anger and frustrations. Matters that should be discussed with no gender discrimination all greased with forced sentiments. And I wonder where Fairness has gone to.

Lol, How can I oppose that fact when just yesterday my younger brother offered to fix a bulb in the house without me asking? I got the bulb but he collected it to have it fixed, How much more the other males in the family? Lol I can't even on a generator neither have I ever washed a car, it's the guys job. .I believe we form our perspective from what goes on around us, so you must understand if some oppose to this thread Your prayer is the most important for us all.

booscy:
Abeg waiter bring ruthdaniels one steamy plate of nkwobi.

Bar man get intrepid0 1 one cold Heineken.

Una Don talk am finish.

Lol..Thanks!

What is Nkwobi BTW?

RuthDaniels:
Lol..Thanks!

What is Nkwobi BTW?

KOPT55:
Only a man who doesn't know his worth will become a maid in his own home.

If there is anything that I don't joke with, it is my time. I don't entertain any unplanned demands on my time
because I consider those to be a waste.

Most women intentionally pretend to be clueless in order not to do any work. I won't even entertain that crap. I will only settle down
with an action-woman, a go-getter. No one has time to be babying another grown-ass human.

Since we are all about equality in these day and time, people have to get their shit done.

Men, please ensure your wife or partner is capable. Believe me, there are no damsels in distress.

Most women can do the things they are always on men's neck for unless said thing is too heavy or something.

trustyshoess:
menopause menopause, same old tired ringtone. Mind You, one doesn't need a man to have children if she really wants a child that bad so stop the menopause chant, it's tired, let it rest.

As for your wife, good for you. She's submissive, you want submissive, y'all are compatible. Others that aren't submissive will find those that don't mind Okay? Different strokes for different folks

bukatyne:
Your story is entertaining, I give you that.

Once a wife is working a full time job, she is carrying more than 70% of the home's weight.

There is only a semblance of balance when a wife is a stay at home wife with a fully providing husband.

Do wives as potrayed in your OP exist? I am sure they do. Have I encountered them? No.

Again, most of the chores are not even routine or how many times do you change a leaking faucet or a faulty gen?

I would agree with you that everyone needs to appreciate their spouses more whether you think they are doing their duties or not.

crackhaus:
Unless spermatozoa for fertilization can now be sourced from another place besides a man's body, then that statement is lacking depth.
Marrying the man who provided the sperm or living with him, is besides the point.

Men and women need each other when it comes down to the basics, no need pretending like one can do without the other.

trustyshoess:
Okay maybe I didnt put my first point properly, let me rephrase; a woman does not need to be in a relationship with or married to a man to have children if she so desires.
Men and women may WANT each other but they certainly do not NEED each other (in a romantic way anyway). Yes, humans are social creatures and therefore need human interaction, but many of us have enough of this interaction daily from our families and close friends. This is proven by the fact that asexual people exist. The fact that they have no sexual feelings or desires doesn't make them any less of a man or woman