₦airaland Forum

pocohantas:
But we are not asking for advice na. I just want to learn from your story, let me know if m bf falls in that category.

anigold:
it's almost impossible to forget completely,if someone defrauded you of millions u can forgive the person to forget what happened is almost impossible.. the issue is don't keep malice..

Silvermoney:
I don't want a sexually charged wife. All these women who are always hot and ready for action scare me marriage wise. When you have children, flabby body sets in, post baby big stomach that is almost permanent with many women, and overfamiliarity blurs the initial lust and attractiveness. Your desire to have sex with her as a man would drop. And yet she would still expect you to be pumping her regularly with the vigor you would if you meet a new sexy 22 year old girl. Simply not possible.

It doesn't work. I don't want that at all.

newsynews:
Some divorced people on AskReddit have shared what they see as red flags in a relationship which they say people preparing to get married should not ignore.





https://www.wotzup.ng/15-divorced-people-reveal-subtle-red-flags-ignored-before-marrying/

Emmyziski:
Getting married when broke is a setup, that's the only red flag I see.
Guys, never get married until you're a certified billionaire.
YES, that's what we are faced with in our generation, if only you know the hustle mindset of the present youths, you'll also know that very soon, if you're a millionaire, you are as irrelevant as one of the b_oobs left out during a makeout session.

Apina:
Marriage is all about; what rubbish can you take?. Marry someone whose faults or shortcomings u can tolerate cos we all have our own issues

Xiadnat:
Great. thread AND very realistic.

Very potent set of words. Just sit. Or 'Just rest'. This advice you gave is wisdom (or revelation), so simple, yet powerful.

I had same revelation from God. Quite literally. There was a time (quite recently) I was praying to God for a husband. And later, the next day, very early in the morning as I was waking up, though still sub-conscious, I distinctly heard "I will bring him while (and when) you are resting.

When I fully woke up, I knew immediately, that was the audible voice of God (which I have come to hear more often. I asked God for some explanation. And, I got one. Resting, not literal for sleep. But, just means- sit still. Stop striving. Just be. And, what will be will be.

Today my new motto in life is this: whatever has my name on it (love, people, wealth...), will find me. Emphasis on "find me". Amen.

soledayo:
This is exactly how it is. I noticed stuffs like but went ahead... Short of it all....just managing my marriage. God help me.

Idrismusty97:
Congrats.

"A smart man makes a mistake, learns from it, and never makes that mistake again. But a wise man finds a smart man and learns from him how to avoid the mistake altogether."
-Roy H. Williams

Silvermoney:
I don't want a sexually charged wife. All these women who are always hot and ready for action scare me marriage wise. When you have children, flabby body sets in, post baby big stomach that is almost permanent with many women, and overfamiliarity blurs the initial lust and attractiveness. Your desire to have sex with her as a man would drop. And yet she would still expect you to be pumping her regularly with the vigor you would if you meet a new sexy 22 year old girl. Simply not possible.

It doesn't work. I don't want that at all.

tydi:
we talking about heart matters here sir not monetary issue.

sir me self no go forgive person wer chop my 1k in a crook way ,talk more to forget til I get it back.

HRHQueenPhil:
u want a deeper life feminist so u can have an excuse to cheat abi?

vivypretty:
lol lol lol.

Xiadnat:
Great. thread AND very realistic.

Very potent set of words. Just sit. Or 'Just rest'. This advice you gave is wisdom (or revelation), so simple, yet powerful.

I had same revelation from God. Quite literally. There was a time (quite recently) I was praying to God for a husband. And later, the next day, very early in the morning as I was waking up, though still sub-conscious, I distinctly heard "I will bring him while (and when) you are resting.

When I fully woke up, I knew immediately, that was the audible voice of God (which I have come to hear more often. I asked God for some explanation. And, I got one. Resting, not literal for sleep. But, just means- sit still. Stop striving. Just be. And, what will be will be.

Today my new motto in life is this: whatever has my name on it (love, people, wealth...), will find me. Emphasis on "find me". Amen.

SQLmastar:
16...If she's extremely good and hot in bed. Do not think twice, she's an olosho0 .

soledayo:
This is exactly how it is. I noticed stuffs like but went ahead... Short of it all....just managing my marriage. God help me.

MarieSucre:
Nice thread. Nigerian version loading.

Rapsino:
Nice word. So many people r getting married because of children, money n time (especially girls ask linda) not because of love. My believe has always been "let love find yhu". As a young man of 27 I don't have a girlfriend not because I can't but because I am sitting waiting for the my love to come. Yes I am sitting. Of course I do relate with girls, but I am not putting force. If I approach you to be a friend and u r acting reluctant n running away. I move on. I know one day there will be one that I will approach and I will not force myself for attention and I will get it. That girl will be my wife. My advice to young guys is don't waste your time toasting a lady upandan. Sit

nezer83:
Love alone does not sustain marriage, it is just one pillar.
We all have our flaws do we must learn to tolerate and forgive.

newsynews:
Some divorced people on AskReddit have shared what they see as red flags in a relationship which they say people preparing to get married should not ignore.


1. If they cheated on someone before, odds are they’ll do it again.

Reddit user Shaughnmc shared:

During a discussion, she commented on how a couple years prior she slept with a guy that she really liked. The timing seemed wrong, since I knew she was dating another guy around that same time. When I asked if she had broken up with the one guy before she slept with the other, her response was “In my mind I had.”

History repeated itself.

2. Sometimes being mean is just that.

OnSleeplessRoads advised that being mean shouldn’t be excused as being “honest”. Mean is mean.

3. It’s important to be compatible financially.

For Noredditfamous, the sign that all wasn’t well was when his bride wanted more than he could give financially.

Insisting on a wedding dress more than i could afford. Refusing to understand it was too much for me.

4. If you’re not sure, it might not be right.

Bizzle_worldwide said:

I married my first wife extremely quickly. She wanted to get married, I didn’t want to break up.

The day of my wedding, my friends asked me how I was feeling, and my response was ‘Well, I can always get divorced.’

Don’t settle. Marry someone you really, truly love and can see spending your life with. That you’ll still want to hang out with when you’re both old, and fat, and infirm.

I’m remarried, and it makes the world of difference. When you’re with the right person, you know it. If you don’t know it, you probably aren’t with the right person.

5. If your partner pulls a Tristan Thompson, watch out.

Cygnus875 said:

I was on bed-rest while pregnant with our son, due to preterm labor (5 months). I was told no sex as that could start the labor again. Even though we were living together and engaged, and the child was his, he decided that since I was not putting out, under doctor orders, that it was not considered cheating to go have sex with a 19 year old. We were married 15 years and he never would agree that he cheated. It was my fault for withholding.

6. You should be absolutely positive about this decision when you walk down the aisle.

RonSwansonsOldMan wrote:

My gut feeling that I was marrying the wrong person, as I was walking down the aisle.

7. You should be excited to spend time with your significant other.

I enjoyed my time away from him more than time with him. I would get super depressed when i knew he was going to be home from work soon. I brushed it off as being “antisocial” or “independent”.

But now I’m with someone who I’m still excited to see every single day after 7 years and I’m still antisocial and independent.

— Snukes42Q

8. The apple usually doesn’t fall far from the three.

Her family. I thought a rose had grown from sh*t. I was wrong. It was a sh*t garden that grew nothing else.

— dummystupid

9. If his own mom doesn’t have faith in him, neither should you.

Before we got married, his mom said “If you ever get divorced, we will know it was because of him and not you.” Huge red flag, and all I thought was “Wow, what a mean thing to say about your own son!”

— dragonheartstring1

10. You should probably know your bae’s middle name before tying the knot.

When we were filling out the marriage certificate in the courthouse I remember thinking, “huh, so that’s your middle name.”

— pdxcranberry

11. Trust your friends if they tell you this person isn’t a good choice.

A few friends who knew her told me “Don’t do it. She’s a liar”. In hindsight they were totally right.

— tank_of_happiness

12. Seriously, people. Trust your inner circle!

I found out after my divorce all my friends (and family) thought it was a mistake. I wish they’d told me beforehand, but I guess I ignored lots of other red flags…

— rhapsodyknit

13. Your partner should never scare you.

Once, about a month after we moved in together, he got angry and he got REALLY dark and even somewhat scary. I dismissed it as an aberration, a one-time thing that didn’t reflect how he “really” was. Big, big mistake.

My gut told me he was a good guy, but apparently my gut was broken.

— AnyVictory

14. If they’re lying about the small stuff, odds are they’re lying about the big stuff.

Lies about small seemingly insignificant things, but often. If they can lie about something small, but often, they definitely can lie when it’s something big. Small example; meet my ex-wife’s friend and she introduced her as her sister. No problem with this, except when her “sister” needs to barrow money and what not. Didn’t even find out she wasn’t her sister until years into the marriage.

— savemoney2121

15. If your mom sees your union as the “biggest mistake of your life,” it’s probably not the best sign.

Standing around five minutes before the wedding starts my mother says “if we get in the car and leave now I will never say another word, you are making the biggest mistake of your life”

— Ropes4u



https://www.wotzup.ng/15-divorced-people-reveal-subtle-red-flags-ignored-before-marrying/

damijoe77:
tnx.no spiritual mataz dis tym

Oritzy:
I have followed you closely ans I have realized that despite being a feminist you are a very unbiased realistic woman with a big heart. You should be a coach people will learn alot from you.

MarieSucre:
I am not perfect and still working on molding my life philosophy so I will not place myself so high to think I can coach people.

But one thing I want to do is keep learning and be flexible. So firstly, I want to apologise if I have ever come across as crude or impolite to you, I sometimes lose my cool online. Finally, if you ever see an opportunity to engage me in civil intellectual discussion, don't hesitate to do that, whether we agree or disagree at the end we both come off learning something. Peace.

newsynews:
Some divorced people on AskReddit have shared what they see as red flags in a relationship which they say people preparing to get married should not ignore.





https://www.wotzup.ng/15-divorced-people-reveal-subtle-red-flags-ignored-before-marrying/

Xiadnat:
Great. thread AND very realistic.

Very potent set of words. Just sit. Or 'Just rest'. This advice you gave is wisdom (or revelation), so simple, yet powerful.

I had same revelation from God. Quite literally. There was a time (quite recently) I was praying to God for a husband. And later, the next day, very early in the morning as I was waking up, though still sub-conscious, I distinctly heard "I will bring him while (and when) you are resting.

When I fully woke up, I knew immediately, that was the audible voice of God (which I have come to hear more often. I asked God for some explanation. And, I got one. Resting, not literal for sleep. But, just means- sit still. Stop striving. Just be. And, what will be will be.

Today my new motto in life is this: whatever has my name on it (love, people, wealth...), will find me. Emphasis on "find me". Amen.

Chumani:
Always heed to the advice and warning given to you, it could lead to one's doom eternerly.

Silvermoney:
I don't want a sexually charged wife. All these women who are always hot and ready for action scare me marriage wise. When you have children, flabby body sets in, post baby big stomach that is almost permanent with many women, and overfamiliarity blurs the initial lust and attractiveness. Your desire to have sex with her as a man would drop. And yet she would still expect you to be pumping her regularly with the vigor you would if you meet a new sexy 22 year old girl. Simply not possible.

It doesn't work. I don't want that at all.