A young lady has taken to her twitter handle @okemzuruoke to voice out her anger and displeasure about the way her parents are putting much pressure on her junior brother who is yet to gain admission into the university. According to her post, her brother is the first son of the family and as such, much us been expected. She revealed how he has been labeled a failure because he repeated classes and his younger ones caught up with him.


Read full tweets:

I'm literally sick and tired of coming home every time to witness the mental torture my parents put my brother through because he's written UTME twice and didn't get admitted.

Can't wait to start working and get an apartment of my own so I can move in with my young man and help him escape all this rubbish.

This was a boy that grew up with ADHD without a support system to back him up. Took him going to a boarding school to gain some balance and assert himself. Was unbelievably top of his class.

And every now and then he suffers reproof and public shaming because he never seems to be enough. He's literally become a shadow of himself. No friends, no social life, nothing.

Imagine constantly being reminded that you're a useless first son bc you repeated three classes and your younger sister has caught up with you. Or being compared to your peers who are ahead of you. Every. Single. Day.

I lost 16 kg in less than a year bc of this. Went from 79 to 63 kg bc I had to spend one more depressing year at home feeling like a failure bc i wasn't admitted into uni.

Everyday I look at my brother all I see is a young man struggling so hard to get out of a sunken place. He tells me the only time he is truly happy is when I'm around. How much do you have to hate your home for you to not want to be there?

I honestly don't know who it was that added insulting comparisons, mental/verbal abuse and degradation to the list of parenting skills. I don't understand why you need to walk the path of torturing your own child in order to pass a message.

We're always very quick to eulogise our parents, which isn't a bad thing. But we should also be swift to admit when they get things entirely wrong.

A lot of us are going to reenact the bad parenting we experienced in the hands of our parents to our own kids bc we saw nothing wrong with it.

No. Sift out those traits and vow to never have them repeated with your offspring. Never.

Source: https://correctbae.ng/2018/06/05/lady-raises-alarm-over-the-academic-pressures-and-public-shaming-her-parents-put-on-her-brother-who-is-seeking-admission-to-the-university/

This is Nigeria... Your parents are criminals, they should be arrested for child abuse and mental torture..
Thank God my parents don't really know about education, if they knew I might be studying another course I don't want due to pressure


Wow I made it.. The spirit in me told me that this post will make front page... Na so I quickly comment sharp sharp... Ftc at last

Pls should I send my account? , someone shud show me love abeg....

☣ ☠


∆ Many Nigerian parents are the architects of their children's predicament especially in terms of career. They feel they know what's best for the child already without studying the child.

A child that has flair for Mathematics will be asked to study law because his father has law firms and several legal establishments.

Our problem for Nigeria plenty. Most myopic parents feel that if their children didn't study Medicine, Law they can't make it life

And so they keep pressurizing their children to go their way.

Another thing is comparison. Most, Parents compare their children with other children. "Look at Michael he'll be 16 by December and he is in 200level already"


Bullshit. ∆


☣ ☠

No be everybody wey go school...
Wey dey hustle na im know d real way o...
Evrything we do is all for d Ego...
So ogbeni check o....
No be who score 100 percent o....
Many men don make it at d ghetto
And if u check o they no pass Neco.... ....FALZ


It is all about the way.....Help him find his way, because pesin wen Know d way don know d way...

I also have a problem with the way parents lay emphasis on what perfect education should be like....times change, people evolve, they should try to help that boy not only because he's going a star, but because they wouldn't love him to show them dislike when he becomes a star. I've seen stuff like this happen before.....for more info on this kinda topics,
Listen to .....Fly by Hopsin

Well well... Every parent does that.. You know they all got dignity too.. Mama doctor, Daddy Lawyer.. Shey oti yeh eh

Who school help? If I really had good advisers back then, I wouldn't have wasted as much time as I did in the name of earning a degree.

I pity the guy

.

It's a Nigerian thing

Your parents are emotional assasins.

It's really sad what the young man is passing through. In a sane society, he can sue them for the torture. But this is Nigeria, where we celebrate and worship "all authorities", no matter how much they trample on our rights as an individual!


If you can, have a word with your parents, and let them know how their behavior affected you, and how it's probably affecting your brother as well. But most importantly, I pray your desire comes to pass, and you're able to care for him.


ADHD is a mental disorder, but the neurodevelopmental type, and with much love and attention he should do better.

I hate comparisons, to be honest, I lose all love for the person that compares us and at extreme cases, who I'm being compared with

Arant nonsense

Nigeria is a place where everything is possible.. This is Nigeria

Forget all the stories and brush your brother up .
No parents will be happy to see their child contributing to jamb every year like ajo
Is your brother's other name dollapo

Mental torture can lead to depression and worst,suicide.

Sister, it's in most Nigerians parent, but eventually if he gets admitted who will it benefit??
Tell your brother to read harder shikena..

Na by force to go sch?

With the way Nigeria is... No be by school again!! All dem graduates like us...nah aptitude test them won use kill us..and yes including medicine... No place for housemanship, hospitals dun finish, nah connection you need to get federal hospital,..@nd How many private dey your area?? For connectless people

Niaja nah scam

Very unfair not to talk of him having to deal with ADHD!

That's Nigeria for you.. Our parents feel they know everything..

To them they want the best for you while in real sense they are just being selfish

Phemmyhohjor:
Well well... Every parent does that.. You know they all got dignity too.. Mama doctor, Daddy Lawyer.. Shey oti yeh eh

But at the expense of the child's mental well-being. Most parents mentally torture their children and when it backfires, they look for who to blame. We are still lucky, firearms are not yet easily accessible.

bbm2016:
Sister, it's in most Nigerians parent, but eventually if he gets admitted who will it benefit??
Tell your brother to read harder shikena..

A toxic environment is an inhibitor.

Who school epp sef?

Nonsense...

Mumu Nigerian universities.

Tell ur brother to go learn work.

Or better still, u fit help am by doing small olosho work to raise capital for him to start business. Shikena!

Pavore9:


But at the expense of the child's mental well-being. Most parents mentally torture their children and when it backfires, they look for who to blame. We are still lucky, firearms is not yet easily accessible.

Quite pathetic considering his ADHD condition. But the comparison and force isn't only applicable to Nigerian parents. Asians - Indians, Japanese, Singaporeans, Koreans and Chinese - are more extreme.

However, they have better success rates than Nigerians or sub-Saharan Africans as a whole. At least, Indians are CEOs at top American companies and killing the GRE to get admitted into top schools.

Seems we got ours wrong.

blackbelt:
I hate comparisons, to be honest, I lose all love for the person that compares us and at extreme cases, who I'm being compared with

True talk

boolet:
Who school help? If I really had good advisers back then, I wouldn't have wasted as much time as I did in the name of earning a degree.

yahoo yahoo issa goal!!!

boolet:
Who school help? If I really had good advisers back then, I wouldn't have wasted as much time as I did in the name of earning a degree.

yahoo yahoo issa goal!!!

It doesn't seems to me twitter is the best place to find solution to a family issue. Not cool with it. And neither cool with most parents prrssure.

The same people complaining here we'd do the same or worse to their kids...