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South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips - Family (7) - Nairaland

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Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by XhosaNostra(f): 8:33am On Jul 03, 2018
Timewilltell2:
Lol, yet you are in a naija forum ? Who is the retard here? grin. Hunting for a naija man who will take care of the home like a man ? Lol. How is getting slept with for free going for you? cheesy.
You're a clown of note! Do I live on Nairaland? If a person got teleported to Nigeria when they login on Nairaland, trust me I wouldn't touch this place with a ten foot pole. It's bad enough that I have to deal with filth like you, however, there's nothing a little disinfectant can't solve grin

I'm done with you. I'm off to hunt for a Nigerian man to flirt with. Keel over & die from your chest pains.

Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Nobody: 8:38am On Jul 03, 2018
Saviour22:
[color=darkblue] no sane Nigerian will date a South African HIV Aids women, unless he's a scammer and a drug dealer[/color] wink
Yet , well educated nigerian men are marrying independent SA women more lol. No wants a burden for a woman, except for naija guys who have never left our country. If you stepped out a little, you would understand how other women are.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Nobody: 8:39am On Jul 03, 2018
XhosaNostra:
You're a clown of note! Do I live on Nairaland? If a person got teleported to Nigeria when they login on Nairaland, trust me I wouldn't touch this place with a ten foot pole. It's bad enough that I have to deal with filth like you, however, there's nothing a little disinfectant can't solve grin

I'm done with you. I'm off to hunt for a Nigerian man to flirt with. Keel over & die from your chest pains.
Don't mind that dull head, she is super insecure and is intimidated by everything SA, especially the females.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by bukatyne(f): 8:40am On Jul 03, 2018
crackhaus:
How on God's earth are you ladies coming up with this conclusion from that? cheesy cheesy

He will hurt you, really really damage you...
The interpretation of this sentence going by the context of her post isn't even close to what most of you are upset about.

The sentences that followed in that same paragraph are enough to reveal her state of mind to anyone reading with objectivity.
Well not surprisingly, you were honest enough to admit she made a lot of good points instead of just throwing out the baby with the bath water.
Abeg joor....

He will hurt you, really really damage you kwa?

She's the poster child for them endurance crew.

Our spouses would hurt us; yes. Really hurt us? Maybe. Damage? Nope. Really really damage? I jump and pass.

Also her 'you can never win' shows that her state of mind comes from a defeated POV.

I give her kudos to be married at 17 and work it. Shows she's mature, grounded and able to pursue what she wants.

Well learnt years ago not to do so.

I don't agree with everything people I agree with say/do so it's only natural I don't disagree with everything people disagree with say/do.

Went somewhere the Alufa (Pastor) was telling the story of Adam and Eve like he was a co-creator with God and how the forbidden fruit is actually sex and Adam raping Eve bla bla...

Yet, this Pastor is the first I heard stress the importance of good joint fellowship with God and place of in-laws.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Nobody: 8:47am On Jul 03, 2018
Timewilltell2:
Lmfao , it hurts to hear the truth right ? Sisisioge come and see this bitter one , jealous of how we live in naija grin. She cleans, cooks , goes to work , fck for free and takes care of children, if she doesn't she will get killed. What better definition for slave. Lol, they stole white men culture now they are slaves. Stupid ugly things.
You and your friend you are quoting seem bitter and clueless. SA women are by far the most liberated inAfrica and the most independent. You guys are bragging about being second class citizens to men and getting everything done by them when in sane countries women are fighting for same status as men and are making strides in development grin. In SA , America, Rwanda, Kenya, Canada etc women wake up to build power plants , while you are sitting in a sofa " being served" by your " house girls " and adding value not only to their countries but their homes. I would rather marry a " slave " with beauty , brains and drive than a " madam" who thinks I'm a ticket out poverty and who can't do or move a muscle without my sweat. 23 year old graduates own apartments and new cars in SA courtesy of their slavery , while you sit and wait for a big boy to buy you things and make you his personal slave.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Timewilltell2(f): 8:50am On Jul 03, 2018
XhosaNostra:
You're a clown of note! Do I live on Nairaland? If a person got teleported to Nigeria when they login on Nairaland, trust me I wouldn't touch this place with a ten foot pole. It's bad enough that I have to deal with filth like you, however, there's nothing a little disinfectant can't solve grin

I'm done with you. I'm off to hunt for a Nigerian man to flirt with. Keel over & die from your chest pains.
You wish you were nigerian so you can have access to naija good men. Lol, you have been trying to get their attention for a long-time but they always ignore you and flirt with real beauty like us cheesy fool.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by bukatyne(f): 8:52am On Jul 03, 2018
crackhaus:
If your mom is still married to your dad or until his death listen to her. She will save you years of heartache. And she has endured more than you can ever imagine, appreciate her, love on her but don’t let her be the sounding board of your marriage.


Bukatyne, isn't this a good enough summary worthy of note?

Emphasis on the sentences in bold - That can only come from someone with a stable upbringing and no remnants of psychological childhood trauma.

Some weeks ago I made a similar point on one of Kanwulia's threads where I noted that there is absolutely no lesson or mentorship to be received from a divorcee, a baby mama, or someone in her second or third marriage, especially in the area of building a home.
Still supporting my stance on her affinity for enduring.

Assuming that a child would have a stable upbringing because her parents died together is a fallacy.

Infact, her reference to mothers' enduring points to a toxic home.

@last paragraph: Everyone has something to teach; even if it is what you wouldn't do. You are cracking me up! What is the difference between a baby mama and a girl who had/has pre-martial sex? That one was smart enough to use protection, has medical issues or shrewd enough to abort?

What is the difference between a divorcee and a woman cheating on her husband, praying for him to die or soaking her pillow with tears daily? That one was brave enough to walk; that's if her husband did not desert her?

Iman and David before his death were both in their third marriages and stayed married till death did them part.

I am very selective who prays for me; I collect advice solicited and unsolicited from all available quarters and use what works for me.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by XhosaNostra(f): 9:02am On Jul 03, 2018
Timewilltell2:
You wish you were nigerian so you can have access to naija good men. Lol, you have been trying to get their attention for a long-time but they always ignore you and flirt with real beauty like us cheesy fool.
Then why were you frothing at the mouth when the guy you called an iPod said hello to me? You were there too, but he ignored you & talked to me! In fact, you're the one that tried to get his attention like the pathetic, shrine worshipping spinster that you are grin
"Real beauty like us" my àss. If you were indeed beautiful, you wouldn't feel the need to mention it every 2nd post. I can bet my bottom rand you're some Quasimodo- looking cùnt who's never even held hands with a man before.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Timewilltell2(f): 9:10am On Jul 03, 2018
Runalong333:
You and your friend you are quoting seem bitter and clueless. SA women are by far the most liberated inAfrica and the most independent. You guys are bragging about being second class citizens to men and getting everything done by them when in sane countries women are fighting for same status as men and are making strides in development grin. In SA , America, Rwanda, Kenya, Canada etc women wake up to build power plants , while you are sitting in a sofa " being served" by your " house girls " and adding value not only to their countries but their homes. I would rather marry a " slave " with beauty , brains and drive than a " madam" who thinks I'm a ticket out poverty and who can't do or move a muscle without my sweat. 23 year old graduates own apartments and new cars in SA courtesy of their slavery , while you sit and wait for a big boy to buy you things and make you his personal slave.
I would rather not be liberated to do what a man's supposed to do. A man's job is to take care of family not use woman's money , fool. I see they have brainshwaed you with their stupid culture . If they are liberated why their men kill them? Have you ever heard that in naija? Why they have aids ? Why they're jealous of us? We are still more educated than them. Like I said they have no choice but to buy those things , who else will since their men are lazy and don't want to care for their upkeep. Stupid
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Timewilltell2(f): 9:15am On Jul 03, 2018
XhosaNostra:
Then why were you frothing at the mouth when the guy you called an iPod said hello to me? You were there too, but he ignored you & talked to me! In fact, you're the one that tried to get his attention like the pathetic, shrine worshipping spinster that you are grin
"Real beauty like us" my àss. If you were indeed beautiful, you wouldn't feel the need to mention it every 2nd post. I can bet my bottom rand you're some Quasimodo- looking cùnt who's never even held hands with a man before.
Hahaha listen to this prostitute, flirting with an iPod is an achievement? Those people are bottom feeder and slave here in.nigeria. no class and are mostly village idiots. So be ashamed. You sound pained by my beauty and lifestyle grin. You can never reach my level, accept and move on. Trust all the men I've dated never wanted to leave, they all bought me the best gifts and paid big bucks to taste it , while you are bohreling for free grin idiot is your mama who didn't abort you. Go wash dishes, mc Donald employee grin.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by XhosaNostra(f): 9:23am On Jul 03, 2018
Timewilltell2:
Hahaha listen to this prostitute, flirting with an iPod is an achievement? Those people are bottom feeder and slave here in.nigeria. no class and are mostly village idiots. So be ashamed. You sound pained by my beauty and lifestyle grin. You can never reach my level, accept and move on. Trust all the men I've dated never wanted to leave, they all bought me the best gifts and paid big bucks to taste it , while you are bohreling for free grin idiot is your mama who didn't abort you. Go wash dishes, mc Donald employee grin.
And yet that didn't stop you from chimping out, when he started talking to me. The irony!

Yeah, I'll go wash the dishes. You keep receiving your orgasms on Nairaland from the crumbs of attention your toady "toasters" toss at you, thirsty thot grin

Now fùck off, I got better things to do.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by crackhaus: 9:29am On Jul 03, 2018
bukatyne:
Abeg joor....

He will hurt you, really really damage you kwa?

She's the poster child for them endurance crew.

Our spouses would hurt us; yes. Really hurt us? Maybe. Damage? Nope. Really really damage? I jump and pass.

Also her 'you can never win' shows that her state of mind comes from a defeated POV.

I give her kudos to be married at 17 and work it. Shows she's mature, grounded and able to pursue what she wants.

Well learnt years ago not to do so.

I don't agree with everything people I agree with say/do so it's only natural I don't disagree with everything people disagree with say/do.

Went somewhere the Alufa (Pastor) was telling the story of Adam and Eve like he was a co-creator with God and how the forbidden fruit is actually sex and Adam raping Eve bla bla...

Yet, this Pastor is the first I heard stress the importance of good joint fellowship with God and place of in-laws.
Have you considered that maybe you just might be taking the statements literally?
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Timewilltell2(f): 9:30am On Jul 03, 2018
XhosaNostra:
And yet that didn't stop you from chimping out, when he started talking to me. The irony!

Yeah, I'll go wash the dishes. You keep receiving your orgasms on Nairaland from the crumbs of attention your toady "toasters" toss at you, thirsty thot grin

Now fùck off, I got better things to do.
No I was disgusted by his asslicking ways, I had forgotten they are low self esteem like you.

Yes, go slave. And let me relax in my luxury that you will never enjoy in your history. Attention, trust me I get plenty of it from men.all over not iPods. At least I get toested with big bucks every day unlike you grin. Jealous skinny ugly fool.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by XhosaNostra(f): 9:31am On Jul 03, 2018
Timewilltell2:
No I was disgusted by his asslicking ways, I had forgotten they are low self esteem like you.

Yes, go slave. And let me relax in my luxury that you will never enjoy in your history. Attention, trust me I get plenty of it from men.all over not iPods. At least I get toested with big bucks every day unlike you grin. Jealous skinny ugly fool.
...

Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Timewilltell2(f): 9:35am On Jul 03, 2018
XhosaNostra:
...
I'm not the cause of your frustration ok? Stop stalking me all over the place. You are embarasing like all your people here. Get out of our forum you are not wanted. Village girl. I wish I could see you so I can kidnap and force you to another slavery . Mumu
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by crackhaus: 9:40am On Jul 03, 2018
bukatyne:
Still supporting my stance on her affinity for enduring.

Assuming that a child would have a stable upbringing because her parents died together is a fallacy.

Infact, her reference to mothers' enduring points to a toxic home.

@last paragraph: Everyone has something to teach; even if it is what you wouldn't do. You are cracking me up! What is the difference between a baby mama and a girl who had/has pre-martial sex? That one was smart enough to use protection, has medical issues or shrewd enough to abort?

What is the difference between a divorcee and a woman cheating on her husband, praying for him to die or soaking her pillow with tears daily? That one was brave enough to walk; that's if her husband did not desert her?

Iman and David before his death were both in their third marriages and stayed married till death did them part.

I am very selective who prays for me; I collect advice solicited and unsolicited from all available quarters and use what works for me.
Apologies for my next question, it will be personal but I'm trying to streamline the conversation to quickly resolve your misunderstanding of my angle...and quite possibly understand yours as well, depending on your answer to the question.


My assumption is that you have a mother who is still married to your father.
Do you see her as a suitable mentor and model for a successful marriage/home building?
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by XhosaNostra(f): 9:40am On Jul 03, 2018
Timewilltell2:
I'm not the cause of your frustration ok? Stop stalking me all over the place. You are embarasing like all your people here. Get out of our forum you are not wanted. Village girl. I wish I could see you so I can kidnap and force you to another slavery . Mumu
LMAO. I'm now the one stalking you? Go take a look at your posting history for the past couple of days & tell me who's being a creepy little stalker? Next time don't skip out on your morning medication, your delusions are showing.

DISMISSED.

Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Timewilltell2(f): 9:44am On Jul 03, 2018
XhosaNostra:
LMAO. I'm now the one stalking you? Go take a look at your posting history for the past couple of days & tell me who's being a creepy little stalker? Next time don't skip out on your morning medication, your delusions are showing.

DISMISSED.
Stalker , you are dumb. You had better go back to work before your lazy man finds out you are missing out of work hours meaning less money for him. Or you will make it up with the cents you will get from selling your stinking hiv vigina grin. Useless girl.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Nobody: 10:11am On Jul 03, 2018
Timewilltell2:
I would rather not be liberated to do what a man's supposed to do. A man's job is to take care of family not use woman's money , fool. I see they have brainshwaed you with their stupid culture . If they are liberated why their men kill them? Have you ever heard that in naija? Why they have aids ? Why they're jealous of us? We are still more educated than them. Like I said they have no choice but to buy those things , who else will since their men are lazy and don't want to care for their upkeep. Stupid
Funny enough you can't see you are contradicting yourself. First SA women are lazy, now they work hard because no man pays for them ? grin which is which? .

A husband takes care of his family yes, and it's the case here too , the only difference is that women here don't sit around to be fed , they hustle as well whether alone or with the husband. A bf is not obliged to give an allowance to a chick , he can be loved and respected for being himself not for showing his wallet, see different cultures?.

Domestic abuse doesn't happen in naija ? Wtf are you smoking?. Lagos alone if we had records in naija you would see they alone overtake SA in partner killings , the issue is that nairaland is only fond of showing SA stories both fake and true and dimwits like you seem to believe it all. Go to America and see how nigerian men are slaughtering their wives. Aids , so now liberation is tied to a lifestyle disease ? grin. 89% of SA people know their status. And we have less than 10% of our population who have tested and we are the second country affected. Those with brains, not you of course will read between the lines and see if 50% of us tested, it's likely we would have two times the number of SA with hiv. But ignorance is bliss, we live in fools paradise.

They go to school, open businesses or get jobs not look for husband. That's what a 21century woman should be doing , that is why they have a proper middle class, the women participate in paying taxes and development. Unlike ours who think sitting in a sofa watching telemundo is an achievement. You are more likely to see a woman engineer building a bridge in SA , than in naija , ask yourself why cheesy. Gees.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by elvido(m): 12:04pm On Jul 03, 2018
eyinjuege:
Are you saying verbal and psychological abuse is normal?
There's nothing normal about that please. It's damaging, and no one should live that life (including men and women).
Anyway, she hasn't known better as she married so young, and may probably have no family.
If you think it's normal to be verbally and psychologically abusive, it's not o. I can bet it that the same person is also physically abusive, so many scars and hurts she's hiding.
Infact, very abnormal for a husband to break the wife, and vice versa.
Im not saying its normal, but it does happen. I have to agree you are still a bachelor for quoting me. But, relation in reality is not happily ever after...pls be realitic here. no how u try to make it perfect it will still fall short of that. Marry and see!
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by KekeNash(f): 12:11pm On Jul 03, 2018
Saviour22:
[color=darkblue]now where have you been tongue? Now take a look at this ur South Africa HIV Aids sister kekeNash cheesy, u will know that stupidity is written all over her face [/color] grin grin
lol am hotter than all girls in your village, you know it.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by KekeNash(f): 12:18pm On Jul 03, 2018
Timewilltell2:
Is there anyone as fugly as your pic ? grin grin
You
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Okuchris(f): 12:39pm On Jul 03, 2018
Timewilltell2:
You are clearly as damaged as she is .
are you stupid? do you have some knot in your brain?how dare you talk to me like that.
I believe where you come from, they don't teach you how to respect that's why you are so lose with the way and manner you talk to people.
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by brenister10: 2:33pm On Jul 03, 2018
Timewilltell2:
You are clearly a child of an ashewo
Wow! You just got to your abattoir. Do you know the meaning of Ashewo? An ashewo is someone who does not value relationship but cherish jumping from one bed to the other.

From the way you castigated the SA lady, it shows you are the real ashewo and you just confirmed to me that you are a hoe.

I did not want to call you that initially but you ultimately brought out the demon in you by indirectly calling another person who you are.

Hello! please reset your brain
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Nobody: 8:40pm On Jul 03, 2018
KekeNash:
lol am hotter than all girls in your village, you know it.
[color=darkblue] kikiki grin U are one fugly creature, hotter than who undecided You consider yourself hot shocked you are a Bush village monkey[/color]
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Nobody:
Runalong333:
[s] ,yet well educated nigerian men are marrying independent SA women more lol. No wants a burden for a woman, except for naija guys who have never left our country. If you stepped out a little, you would understand how other women are[/s].
[color=darkblue] oga shutup! undecided which Educated Nigerians? undecided The same Nigerians that South Africans are complaining of? that how you guys are using drugs and scamming to destory their country [/color] undecided
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by ekanempatrick28(m): 11:37pm On Jul 03, 2018
U are hailing our men timewilltel2 wen all of u are complilaining dat nigerian men dont spend as before and are now stingy
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by bukatyne(f): 11:29am On Jul 04, 2018
crackhaus:
Have you considered that maybe you just might be taking the statements literally?
I took all her other statements literally; why should I single out these two?
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by crackhaus: 6:00pm On Jul 04, 2018
bukatyne:
I took all her other statements literally; why should I single out these two?
Lol
Re: South African Lady Who Got Married At 17 Gives Marriage Survival Tips by Nobody: 6:31am On Jul 05, 2018
Saviour22:
[color=darkblue] oga shutup! undecided which Educated Nigerians? undecided The same Nigerians that South Africans are complaining of? that how you guys are using drugs and scamming to destory their country [/color] undecided
Don't be a dummy, yes there are many nigerian criminals in SA who are destroying, it's not lie. But we also have educated ones , even if in minority to the losers. Yes love, the free spirited and hardworking nature of the average SA girl.
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