I'm glad you mentioned our mothers - who truly were virtous and hard working women. Can the same be said for your generation? A generation of baby mamas, nymphos, sluuts and lesbians.
if you are talking of today's women
then I'll tell you like I said before
That it depends on the ones you pick
I know so many young hard working ladies back in Nigeria
running catering, hair dressing and other crafts that brings cash
but a lot of young men I see in Nigeria would rather follow what you guys call "slay queen"
when you follow slay queen and then get slayed, you begin to cry...
Back in uni, there were virtuous ladies who were hard working and all, but we were looking for slay queen
The agaro hunters amongst us nailed those ladies and as we speak they are married with kids living happily
The society is corrupt and rotten
Open your eyes and look properly you will see a virtuous lady and industrial one...
if your argument is that these days, there are MORE ladies who don't have much to offer, i would have agreed
@genq, don't know what to tell you sha, but I think you need to do a little research about a typical Nigerian family.. Honestly speaking, in most homes in this country today, women even bring more to the table than the men. Some women may not bring anything to the table, but there are lots out there that do even more than what is required of them, I know a lot of them. Like I said earlier, please do some research before coming here to say what you know nothing about..
You even sound like a misogynist
I'm so happy to see you say many women contribute to their homes. This is something I notice in Nigeria a lot. Is it the bankers, drs, market women etc. The only downturn is that they don't pursue their careers aggressively like their male counterparts because of their children and homes, so at the end of the day the male collegues may end up doing better.
No please, I was not trying to look down on the amount of bride price, ok? My problem is that the men complain about it, they make so much fuss about bride price, they feel the women are not worth it. Yes, the bride price is significant, I only mentioned that some bride prices are so cheap, to clarify my views on why men should stop complaining, cuz it's not too much a sacrifice. Am not even bothered about name change, my point is, men should always remember that a woman had to let go her father's name, which is a big deal, to bear his name, show a little appreciation, simple.
I see yoir point BUT I think there are two things that are a bit somehow in your post
1) Changing your surname is a social construct that you don't have to adhere to..... How this Norman French culture permeated into mainstream global culture still baffles me...
many many cultures DO not mandate you to change surname core Islamic culture, and Latin culture (Hispanic) are two amongst many you choose to change your name, and the society has conditioned people to believe that is the norm
2) Bride price SIGNIFIES something it's not about the amount, it's the SIGNIFICANCE of that act
Bride pricr originally connotes ownership (back in the day) And it's not about the amount paid no matter the amt paid, once value was paid, the "product" becomes your own
That is why I pay no bride price
And none of my girls will be paid brideprice
It's a culture that should be THROWN AWAY if truly you do not want men who believe strongly in what bride price connotes to see you as possessions.
LilMissFavvy: No please, I was not trying to look down on the amount of bride price, ok? My problem is that the men complain about it, they make so much fuss about bride price, they feel the women are not worth it. Yes, the bride price is significant, I only mentioned that some bride prices are so cheap, to clarify my views on why men should stop complaining, cuz it's not too much a sacrifice. Am not even bothered about name change, my point is, men should always remember that a woman had to let go her father's name, which is a big deal, to bear his name, show a little appreciation, simple.
Little appreciation for taking my name? Does taking my name add money to my bank account? I'll rather have a woman who impacts positively in my life who keeps her fathers name than a liability, a nag and one who takes away my peace but chooses to take my surname. Who surname epp? Marriage is more prestigious to women than to men, that's why they can't date a man for a long time without asking for marriage. They feel they need to be married to be complete. They probably are the ones who need to show appreciation.
I'm so happy to see you say many women contribute to their homes. This is something I notice in Nigeria a lot. Is it the bankers, drs, market women etc. The only downturn is that they don't pursue their careers aggressively like their male counterparts because of their children and homes, so at the end of the day the male collegues may end up doing better.
This is not true. Most pursue relentlessly and rise to the top. Stop generalizing.
Yes, show a little appreciation and stop whining over the little token you spend. Can you impact positively on a woman who impacts positively in your life as well? Would your male ego not feel bruised if your wife is more successful than you? I wouldn't know. Marriage is prestigious to both men and women. The only reason a lady will wish for marriage earlier than her male folk, is Nature. Nature designed women giving them a time gap for natural procreation, tho artificial procreation processes has now made things easier. If not for this, a lot of gals would not be bothered much about marriage.
Little appreciation for taking my name? Does taking my name add money to my bank account? I'll rather have a woman who impacts positively in my life who keeps her fathers name than a liability, a nag and one who takes away my peace but chooses to take my surname. Who surname epp? Marriage is more prestigious to women than to men, that's why they can't date a man for a long time without asking for marriage. They feel they need to be married to be complete. They probably are the ones who need to show appreciation.
LilMissFavvy: Yes, show a little appreciation and stop whining over the little token you spend. Can you impact positively on a woman who impacts positively in your life as well? Would your male ego not feel bruised if your wife is more successful than you? I wouldn't know. Marriage is prestigious to both men and women. The only reason a lady will wish for marriage earlier than her male folk, is Nature. Nature designed women giving them a time gap for natural procreation, tho artificial procreation processes has now made things easier. If not for this, a lot of gals would not be bothered much about marriage.
What token? Who is talking about spending? Men and women are now equal and should do things equally. Keep your name if you want. You are the one talking of appreciation? Why should I appreciate you changing your surname to mine? Of what value is that to me? I don't know the kind of men you hang around, personally I don't rate people in terms of financial success. As long as I put food on the table, put a roof over our heads and pay my kids school fees, my wife can use her billions to buy Ferraris and Louis Vuittons if she pleases. Only insecure people are moved by other peoples financial successes.
Hmm..... Are you trying to sound different, or are you indeed different? Whatever, I don't need an answer. But most men have demeaned women, complaining that they spend on bride price, etc, issues of spending is part of the main write up above. If you are in need of a lady who can impact you positively, then go search, be patient, and you will find.
What token? Who is talking about spending? Men and women are now equal and should do things equally. Keep your name if you want. You are the one talking of appreciation? Why should I appreciate you changing your surname to mine? Of what value is that to me? I don't know the kind of men you hang around, personally I don't rate people in terms of financial success. As long as I put food on the table, put a roof over our heads and pay my kids school fees, my wife can use her billions to buy Ferraris and Louis Vuittons if she pleases. Only insecure people are moved by other peoples financial successes.
People are even wasting their energy trying to explain to this doofus what women bring to the table. If you feel that they bring nothing, then settle down with a man or a goat. It’s not by force.
Nobody has to educate you in your willful ignorance, sexism and hate for women. Imagine using phrases such as “fickle lives”.
LilMissFavvy: No please, I was not trying to look down on the amount of bride price, ok? My problem is that the men complain about it, they make so much fuss about bride price, they feel the women are not worth it. Yes, the bride price is significant, I only mentioned that some bride prices are so cheap, to clarify my views on why men should stop complaining, cuz it's not too much a sacrifice. Am not even bothered about name change, my point is, men should always remember that a woman had to let go her father's name, which is a big deal, to bear his name, show a little appreciation, simple.
men we moan about bride price as if its charged by women when in fact most african bride price are charged by the same men who moaned about it when he got married
he repeats the same cycle when his daughter is getting married
cococandy: People are even wasting their energy trying to explain to this doofus what women bring to the table. If you feel that they bring nothing, then settle down with a man or a goat. It’s not by force.
Nobody has to educate you in your willful ignorance, sexism and hate for women. Imagine using phrases such as “fickle lives”.
There are a whole lots of things that a woman can offer, only boils down to what you want! Relationships are too transactional these days!
That being said, this world is no longer a world of ladies sitting back and receiving all they need.
The desire to leave something worthwhile, a mark should consume every lady. This transcends just being successful.
This is no longer a period of walking around purposelessly or thinking the world revolves around you, your nails, body, shoes and clothes.
I want to see more ladies burn with the desire for knowledge and its application. Burn with the desire to make a change while making profits/progress .
Women are doing great things.
They just need to be consistent and marry the right man who won't derail them.
cococandy: [s]People are even wasting their energy trying to explain to this doofus what women bring to the table. If you feel that they bring nothing, then settle down with a man or a goat. It’s not by force.
Nobody has to educate you in your willful ignorance, sexism and hate for women. Imagine using phrases such as “fickle lives”.
Dumbass.[/s]
I thought you guys are feminist, so what do you have to offer apart from your Toto....?
Gaggi: As for a wife: 1. she cares for you and your kids if any. 2. She helps you become a father, if you have kids. 3. She is a confidant and is there during good and bad times, she cries and laughs with you. 4. She ensures your money is not frittered away, at least for the sake of the future of the kids. 5. Lastly, takes care of your sexual needs.
As for a girlfriend. 1. She takes care of your sexual needs. 2. Refer to #1 3. Refer to #1 4. Refer to #1
When you meet a good woman, you'll surely find a reason. However, its better to be single than be with a person that adds no value to your life. Some women just bring misery and drama.
genq: Depending on what age group you are in you may have noticed the decline in any traditional strengths millennial women can even offer these days. So not only have men lost all legal, reproductive and traditional benefits that used to be theirs, women have now lost what little aside from a v@gina they still could add to a man's life.
We men now cook, clean and have an nicely decorated and clean homes as single bachelors. I can iron my shirts better and quicker than any woman and can do any chores better for myself than anyone and generally do it better than most women I know.
Women I have met these days have careers and yet can often not cook themselves a single meal, when you marry them they carrry this same modern macho-feminist ideologies into the home. With their over-inflated self importance, they expect you to finance their lives throughout courtship.
If you are stupid enough to get married, you pay bride price only to end up paying for the roof over their heads, bills, school fees etc... Some women are so lazy that they require househelps to do the chores unlike their western counterparts who work and clean their homes by themselves.
I am not talking about making women house slaves here, but lets be real, what does a woman bring to the table that is greater than what men do for women all the days of their fickle lives. Why must we continue to take care of a grown entitled women? and please dont mention sex or kids because that is a mutual benefit (sometimes women even benefit more from kids than men do).
Increasingly, men are realising how we have absolutely no need or benefit of having a woman in our lives other than their overated and worn out v@ginas. We are the prize not them! Women need men and not vice versa.
In this 2019, somebody is still asking question for the gods? If you don't want to get married or have anything to do with women, stay on your own na. Shuu... What do women bring to the table?! O n bi mi o! Aburo Bobrisky
Little appreciation for taking my name? Does taking my name add money to my bank account? I'll rather have a woman who impacts positively in my life who keeps her fathers name than a liability, a nag and one who takes away my peace but chooses to take my surname. Who surname epp? Marriage is more prestigious to women than to men, that's why they can't date a man for a long time without asking for marriage. They feel they need to be married to be complete. They probably are the ones who need to show appreciation.
Thank u my brother for this very nice statement! Don't mind all this naija women. But I noticed from experience that women from the west(USA,Europe and Asia) are more reasonable than this bunch of naija women we have... When I was in the USA ,I was surprised to know that men and women split bills when on a date!!
What token? Who is talking about spending? Men and women are now equal and should do things equally. Keep your name if you want. You are the one talking of appreciation? Why should I appreciate you changing your surname to mine? Of what value is that to me? I don't know the kind of men you hang around, personally I don't rate people in terms of financial success. As long as I put food on the table, put a roof over our heads and pay my kids school fees, my wife can use her billions to buy Ferraris and Louis Vuittons if she pleases. Only insecure people are moved by other peoples financial successes.
.. Thank you so much for this comment. This is what I keep telling men.Do your duty as a man and if she wants to buy the whole estates,and cars in the world,she's is free.After all, its our kids that are going to be the rightful owners when the time comes. Like I used to say,most of the things I do today is for the betterment of the future of our kids.
men we moan about bride price as if its charged by women when in fact most african bride price are charged by the same men who moaned about it when he got married
he repeats the same cycle when his daughter is getting married
LilMissFavvy: No please, I was not trying to look down on the amount of bride price, ok? My problem is that the men complain about it, they make so much fuss about bride price, they feel the women are not worth it. Yes, the bride price is significant, I only mentioned that some bride prices are so cheap, to clarify my views on why men should stop complaining, cuz it's not too much a sacrifice. Am not even bothered about name change, my point is, men should always remember that a woman had to let go her father's name, which is a big deal, to bear his name, show a little appreciation, simple.
Changing your father's name is not a big deal and shouldn't be a meal ticket into a man's pocket! Otherwise, we can decide to flip it ie I bear your name while you empty your bank account on top my head Lolzzz, how about that
Ooopps''....so like Esau, you don't mind selling your father's name, your name, and your generations name becos of the offer of my bank account....o yeah, I will gladly accept the offer. .....some smart guys know a name is worth more than money. Am not saying you ain't smart anyways. Get the message and judge yourself .
Jman06: Changing your father's name is not a big deal and shouldn't be a meal ticket into a man's pocket! Otherwise, we can decide to flip it ie I bear your name while you empty your bank account on top my head Lolzzz, how about that
LilMissFavvy: Ooopps''....so like Esau, you don't mind selling your father's name, your name, and your generations name becos of the offer of my bank account....o yeah, I will gladly accept the offer. .....some smart guys know a name is worth more than money. Am not saying you ain't smart anyways. Get the message and judge yourself .
That name thing is inconsequential! It should never be considered a reason for a lady to dump all her problems on a man. Better still, you can decide to keep your surname if bearing my name is the only "value" you're gonna add to my life. I don't fucccking care!
Was surname issue the only benefit a man gains from marriage to a woman? Is that all you can find up there? Wadeva, suit yourself!
Jman06: That name thing is inconsequential! It should never be considered a reason for a lady to dump all her problems on a man. Better still, you can decide to keep your surname if bearing my name is the only "value" you're gonna add to my life. I don't fucccking care!