₦airaland Forum

frozen70g:
I don't intend to insult your wife, she is just being stubborn and wicked, she has no remorse and won't change unless you apply a drastic measure

You have tried so much for her and you can't come and kill yourself

Just get a side chick and be happy with your self but inform that you are married but can't find happiness at home

If along the line you find more happiness with your side chick, settle down with her.

Some women can snuff life out of aan delebrately


I don't care how people will react to my post, but your happiness is my concern

What if the side-chick is hiding her true nature too??

Bros gud am to u, I HV read ur story n I HV seen u r a weak man, u dnt HV a say in ur home, first let me start frm when u met ur wife in 2009, there where signs dat she exhibited dat she was nt gng to be a gud wife bt u later married her, 2ndly wen u were dating her didnt she come n stay with u 4 weeks to knw hw clean n tidy she was, like washing of plates n tidying ur room, didn't u notice all day or u we're jst after sex n hw gud she was in bed. 3rdly ur wife accused u of sleeping with a minor n u were cool with her d only tin u did was to warn her y didn't u report to her parents n after dng dat n she still repeat dat same tin again u would HV taken actions by shutting her up wit slaps, bt u acted like a weak man, bros do nt let a woman dictate 4 u, 4 me broda all d signs where dere wen u were dating bt u went on to marry her n see d consequences which u will HV to live wit in ur life time, 4 u to regain control of ur home do wot I said n bet u me u will see hw she will change

Egwu dikwa!

kay29000:
Same thoughts I'm having. If you see how happy my married friends get when they finally leave the house to hangout with me for a few hours...you wonder what is really going on.

baba i weak o

Genqq:
Sometimes? Dude you should regret that sham of a marriage ALL the time.

Moreso, that dirty thing you call a wife should be in jail for the ABUSE she inflicted on those little CHILDREN. You are also an enabler of child abuse by refusing to report her to relevant authorities.

Forget these women citing "depression" etc.. sometimes a badly behaved woman is simply a badly behaved woman and should be treated accordingly.

I can't stand simps who employ KIDS for their LAZY wives in the guise of "housemaids" and further turn a blind eye to the maltreatment of these innocent maids

You and that w!tch must be jailed.

The best comment here.

He married a mental patient. Someone who feels better by making others suffer, causing pains to the point of spilling blood and feels good about it.

The woman should be made to sleep in police cell severally till her human sense returns.

She seems to be half animal.

Step 1. Get the elders if both family involve and see if there will be change.
Step 2. If one did not work, I will encourage separation for about a year and see if her brain will go back to factory settings.
Step 3. If after a year she didn't realise her mistakes, then she is not your wife and divorce won't be a bad thing to avoid future casualties

1Sharon:
This is the only comment that isn't screaming
"mental illness"!

OPs wife is simply a lazy woman that got bitter cos she had to pull up her socks after having 3 kids.

As for the child abuse, nothing new there.

Most Nigerians are abusive to kids that aren't theirs.

She wouldn't be abusive to her kids, is mere wickedness. A lot of parents maltreat people's kids living with them but wouldn't let a fly touch theirs.

softpee:
Bros gud am to u, I HV read ur story n I HV seen u r a weak man, u dnt HV a say in ur home, first let me start frm when u met ur wife in 2009, there where signs dat she exhibited dat she was nt gng to be a gud wife bt u later married her, 2ndly wen u were dating her didnt she come n stay with u 4 weeks to knw hw clean n tidy she was, like washing of plates n tidying ur room, didn't u notice all day or u we're jst after sex n hw gud she was in bed. 3rdly ur wife accused u of sleeping with a minor n u were cool with her d only tin u did was to warn her y didn't u report to her parents n after dng dat n she still repeat dat same tin again u would HV taken actions by shutting her up wit slaps, bt u acted like a weak man, bros do nt let a woman dictate 4 u, 4 me broda all d signs where dere wen u were dating bt u went on to marry her n see d consequences which u will HV to live wit in ur life time, 4 u to regain control of ur home do wot I said n bet u me u will see hw she will change

I disagree with your 2nd point. Do you mean all ladies should cohabit with their intended spouse so as to ascertain their level of tidiness? Some of us will put up our best behaviour to clinch the prize which is the ring.

Sammycee:
Stop being senseless please

Are you not fo*lish and senseless to make such flimsy excuses on her behalf even after the OP admitted that he noticed some of these traits when they were dating?
She is toxic to her husband, violent to her maids and the husband's niece but calm and loving to her own family when they visit, she doesn't clean the house, do laundry for months even to wash her children's uniform na war,she comes home late and doesn't cook and you are here typing crap that it's because OP has stopped doing those things he used to do when they were dating. Obviously, u no wise at all.

Woman wrapper oshi.

mechanics:
God is against it, read your Bible well, and whoever does that won't make heaven except the person returns to his or her partner.

hahahaahhahahaaahahahahhhahahahhaha



So you mean you'd agree to live the rest of your life in misery because of a book written by your fellow men over 2000 years ago?




Don't be ridiculous

sassysure:
Let me be straight forward to you.
The guy is contradicting himself up and down.
First, she can't wash school uniforms, now, she love the kids with all her heart. So what does he want?
After beating her and apologising, how did he follow up so there will be no repetition? It ended in bed and everybody was happy.
U know your wife don't like your people, why are they still living with you?
Until she murder someone?
Must they live with people if that brings out the worst in her?

She don't have male friends, don't do extra marital affair.
So what is his problem?
She controls him, he is happy with that, as long as she continue having sex with her. He has been overlooking.
Because she is denying him, he now remembers she is a bad and vile woman and is looking for solution.
Something that has grown so deep with big branches.
Wish them luck.
He should come back after one yr to let us know how far the therapy and counselling helped so others will learn from it

I dont really see your point

She is good with the kids, at the same time she doesnt wash their uniform. Does washing uniform make you relate with your kids better She has bad habits which he is overlooking when he shouldnt be, fine. Does it mean she doesnt like her kids?

Yes, he hasnt actually confronted the issue, just from arguing to beating with no solution. Thats why I told him to be harder on her on these issues and stop letting her get away with things

I said that her beating was getting much, you scornfully asked me about my upbringing and said beating househelps to coma is "normal training" in Nigeria.

She has finished beating them to oblivion, you're now asking why do they live there in the first place. Which I already replied to you about and you didnt answer.

I said the woman finished the first 2 kids and he still brought more to live with them...he is part of the problem because he is not seeing the writing on the wall. Why do you quote me without reading what I said?

Yeah, he likes having sex with her, is it a crime? He has been manipulated and now his eyes have cleared. People do stupid things for love all the time...now that he wants to find a solution the way is open to him

I dont get why you are making inane comments on the issue without making any point. He has a wrong priority, yes...that doesnt mean he cant correct himself

Mrcashman87:
I am not new to Nairaland but I have to use this account for my story . I have met her in 2009 she was calm , doesn’t talk much but easily get angry and I also noticed that she wasn’t a good cook but was good in other things ( chores) , it didn’t stopped me from loving her, I didn’t tell any of my people even though I have sisters that are good cook but I decided to take her to catering school to learn how to cook which she went for lessons to practice.

We got married in 2013 , she got pregnant that same month and she became so lazy that I will go to work and come back to found the house very messy with everything’s all over the places , dirty dishes and not dinner yet, and I have to take over cleaning and cooking dinner for us. She claimed she could not longer clean the house , she is tired and need to rest so I have decided to get a house help for her , a small 14 years old, this girl was hard working , very obedient but to my wife she is evil , every single day I comes back from work , this girl is always in tears my wife will beat the hell out of her to the extent of giving her black eye , if I confront her she will start accusing me of sleeping with the girl which is not true, I can never stoop so low to sleep with an underage girl. I have nieces of similar ages what I wouldn’t want another person to do to my nieces and wouldn’t do to another person daughter.

One time I came back from work to found the girl in a pool of blood , that my wife hit her with a wooden chair and she had a deep cut on her head , I got angry with my wife even her reasons didn’t make sense to me , all because she asked the poor girl to warmed up the baby milk and she mistakenly left it for too long , the milk was too hot to give to the crying baby so she got angry at her and hit her . I have told my wife she shouldn’t act like that no matter what and here come again you are sleeping with her and that’s why u are siding with her , we had an heated argument that I have left the house to cool down , I came back after 5 hours and next morning I have send for my brother to take the girl back to her parents , I have given her money 30k to manage that was how the girl left the house.

When our first child was 6 months , we found out she was 2 months pregnant she cried that the baby is too small , she can’t keep the pregnancy , I have begged her to keep that everything will be alright . Our twins were born a girl and boy , having 3 children under 2 wasn’t easy for us and I have to go to work while she staying with the kids all alone and she was depressed , I have decided to bring in a house help 15 years old boy , the same thing repeated again , she was maltreated him the same thing she did with the girl , that boy didn’t even stays with us for 2 months , he run away . I came back to found her crying that the boy has slapped her and run away, I was angry for what he did even swear if I catch him , he will regret the day he was born but the other way I knew that boy did it for self defence .

After the boy left I said no more e help , she will have to manage alone because I couldn’t help her anymore , but my house become dirty that I wouldn’t even want to bring in visitors because of the state of the house , dirty plates can stay in the sink for 3 -4 days , laundry she has a washing machine but she couldn’t bother to do , cooking we eats take away every single night , imagine I comes back home 9pm due to my job and Lagos traffic , at that time I’m even exhausted but I have to started cleaning , one time I got pissed with her that she didn’t wash the eldest daughter school uniform and all her uniform 5 sets of uniform were dirty and she had no clean one to put on in the morning , I have to wash them at 10pm and for her she didn’t see anything wrong with that.

When the twins were 1 years she told me she is tired of staying at home that she wanted to go to work , I have told her to wait at least for them to be a year and 6 months to start school before she can pursue her career but she disagreed with me, so I gave her money for business , she opened a shop . We had an agreement that she should be closing down her shop at 7pm so she could be home with the kids and take care of the house , she was ok and I got a elderly woman as a help , she doesn’t lives with us , she comes at 6 am and closes at 8pm and I also brought 2 of my nieces 18 and 11 to the house. Every since she started working she has never get home on time , sometimes she stays until 10pm , if I talk she get angry and will start raining insults on me , we haven’t make love in a long time , she always complains of being tired , her stomach is paining her etc etc. I have decided to leave her alone and not bother her about sex anymore , and it doesn’t bother too. She acts as im a nobody to her. So it happened in July I came back home to found my niece 11 years old with a deep cut and blood on her eyebrows and my wife did it just because the girl broke a plate so she hit the girl with the broken plate , first all I had to rush her to the hospital and she had 11 stitches and went back home, all I wanted to sit with her and to talk sense with her but she wasn’t even interested all she could do was shouting at me , accusing me of sleeping with both my nieces and the elderly house help , was so angry that I have beaten her badly which I later regretted and apologise to her.

That was the first time I have lay my hand on her something I vow not to do to the woman I love but she pushed me so bad and I have been remorseful but she refuse to forgive me . It’s now 4 months we don’t talk , we don’t sleep in the same room , she just do her own and come home anytime she pleases. I just don’t know what to do anymore , I love my wife and children but her attitudes isn’t right. We have 3 beautiful children 5and twins are 4. Sometime i want to divorce her but when I think about my children I just don’t feel like going ahead with divorce but I’m also a human and can’t stop living like this .

Please my brothers and sisters help me with your advices

If we married men opened mouth on what most of us are are passing through in hands of our wife
Most guys will run away from marriage. It is better to marry extrovert than a lady that is calm or gentle during courtship. By the time you marry her and she gives birth, you will see the beast in her.
Don't let me say more that.

Nawa o!
As I read the Op's story, I was so mad at him and the wife.
I thought it was just me, until I read the comments. �
Nairalanders no get chill at all.
That woman cannot live with someone like me.
I love kids a lot and when I see them abused, it drives me nuts.

400billionman:
The best comment here.

He married a mental patient. Someone who feels better by making others suffer, causing pains to the point of spilling blood and feels good about it.

The woman should be made to sleep in police cell severally till her human sense returns.

She seems to be half animal.

do u kw the funny thing. the lady parents are fully aware of her character,,, so telling them will not be strange to them...
another thing people keep blaming depression,, a man and a woman who is more depressed..
man go go work 365days, eat just once a day or twice in the hux he is caterring for,, from 8am to 8pm ,they think it is easy,, just from bus to bus, most times mistakenly hit while walking by car,,

make op just move on abeg

wirinet:
Depression does not make someone violent. Depression does not make you maltreat other people's children, while pampering your own. She is a narcissist.

Threats will not work for her as she no send the husband. She has gone months without talking to him. She does not cook, wash his cloths or have sèx with him. She will use the children to blackmail him and squeeze every naira she can.

You can be depressed and narcissistic at the same time. You can be depressed and mean to other people's kids at the same time.

Depression doesnt only happen to "nice" people

If he still wants her he will have to treat both her Bleep up and her mental problem because she may still have some remaining

[/quote][quote author=Mrcashman87 post=83361506]I am not new to Nairaland but I have to use this account for my story . I have met her in 2009 she was calm , doesn’t talk much but easily get angry and I also noticed that she wasn’t a good cook but was good in other things ( chores) , it didn’t stopped me from loving her, I didn’t tell any of my people even though I have sisters that are good cook but I decided to take her to catering school to learn how to cook which she went for lessons to practice.

We got married in 2013 , she got pregnant that same month and she became so lazy that I will go to work and come back to found the house very messy with everything’s all over the places , dirty dishes and not dinner yet, and I have to take over cleaning and cooking dinner for us. She claimed she could not longer clean the house , she is tired and need to rest so I have decided to get a house help for her , a small 14 years old, this girl was hard working , very obedient but to my wife she is evil , every single day I comes back from work , this girl is always in tears my wife will beat the hell out of her to the extent of giving her black eye , if I confront her she will start accusing me of sleeping with the girl which is not true, I can never stoop so low to sleep with an underage girl. I have nieces of similar ages what I wouldn’t want another person to do to my nieces and wouldn’t do to another person daughter.

One time I came back from work to found the girl in a pool of blood , that my wife hit her with a wooden chair and she had a deep cut on her head , I got angry with my wife even her reasons didn’t make sense to me , all because she asked the poor girl to warmed up the baby milk and she mistakenly left it for too long , the milk was too hot to give to the crying baby so she got angry at her and hit her . I have told my wife she shouldn’t act like that no matter what and here come again you are sleeping with her and that’s why u are siding with her , we had an heated argument that I have left the house to cool down , I came back after 5 hours and next morning I have send for my brother to take the girl back to her parents , I have given her money 30k to manage that was how the girl left the house.

When our first child was 6 months , we found out she was 2 months pregnant she cried that the baby is too small , she can’t keep the pregnancy , I have begged her to keep that everything will be alright . Our twins were born a girl and boy , having 3 children under 2 wasn’t easy for us and I have to go to work while she staying with the kids all alone and she was depressed , I have decided to bring in a house help 15 years old boy , the same thing repeated again , she was maltreated him the same thing she did with the girl , that boy didn’t even stays with us for 2 months , he run away . I came back to found her crying that the boy has slapped her and run away, I was angry for what he did even swear if I catch him , he will regret the day he was born but the other way I knew that boy did it for self defence .

After the boy left I said no more e help , she will have to manage alone because I couldn’t help her anymore , but my house become dirty that I wouldn’t even want to bring in visitors because of the state of the house , dirty plates can stay in the sink for 3 -4 days , laundry she has a washing machine but she couldn’t bother to do , cooking we eats take away every single night , imagine I comes back home 9pm due to my job and Lagos traffic , at that time I’m even exhausted but I have to started cleaning , one time I got pissed with her that she didn’t wash the eldest daughter school uniform and all her uniform 5 sets of uniform were dirty and she had no clean one to put on in the morning , I have to wash them at 10pm and for her she didn’t see anything wrong with that.

When the twins were 1 years she told me she is tired of staying at home that she wanted to go to work , I have told her to wait at least for them to be a year and 6 months to start school before she can pursue her career but she disagreed with me, so I gave her money for business , she opened a shop . We had an agreement that she should be closing down her shop at 7pm so she could be home with the kids and take care of the house , she was ok and I got a elderly woman as a help , she doesn’t lives with us , she comes at 6 am and closes at 8pm and I also brought 2 of my nieces 18 and 11 to the house. Every since she started working she has never get home on time , sometimes she stays until 10pm , if I talk she get angry and will start raining insults on me , we haven’t make love in a long time , she always complains of being tired , her stomach is paining her etc etc. I have decided to leave her alone and not bother her about sex anymore , and it doesn’t bother too. She acts as im a nobody to her. So it happened in July I came back home to found my niece 11 years old with a deep cut and blood on her eyebrows and my wife did it just because the girl broke a plate so she hit the girl with the broken plate , first all I had to rush her to the hospital and she had 11 stitches and went back home, all I wanted to sit with her and to talk sense with her but she wasn’t even interested all she could do was shouting at me , accusing me of sleeping with both my nieces and the elderly house help , was so angry that I have beaten her badly which I later regretted and apologise to her.

That was the first time I have lay my hand on her something I vow not to do to the woman I love but she pushed me so bad and I have been remorseful but she refuse to forgive me . It’s now 4 months we don’t talk , we don’t sleep in the same room , she just do her own and come home anytime she pleases. I just don’t know what to do anymore , I love my wife and children but her attitudes isn’t right. We have 3 beautiful children 5and twins are 4. Sometime i want to divorce her but when I think about my children I just don’t feel like going ahead with divorce but I’m also a human and can’t stop living like this .

Please my brothers and sisters help me with your advices

Hello Chief
I strongly very sad n feeling your pain. You are in deep mess, if children weren't involved it would have been alot more easier, pls look for people she respects n reverence either in her family or anywhere. Pls dont argue or cos a stair again just apologise to this woman n ask for peace hopefully the people you involved will help u ask for that as well. If this is not possible biko, either you ask her to pack n go, or you leave the house for her. You peace of mind is proper if you check well this matter has not only affected you emotionally but also financially. Please take care of yourself first. God help your home

nel4k:
You really have a big issue here. I would advise or recommend you:

1. Find out who her friends are because they can really be an influence on her. (When this people sit and discuss eh, you go run). If you get the bad egg, tell him/her/them not to near your home again.
2. Have you tried discussing with her closest friend or family who she really respects?
3. About beating up minors and assistances; scare her by contracting someone to go to her shop and drop a letter of abuse from a fake NGO and if she continues, so sad, don't bring any assistant to your home again rather bring her own siblings and loved ones.
4. About cleaning and tidying up your house and taking care of the children, laundry would do and try increasing the children's uniforms.
5. Always ensure you teach your children how to respect people including your wife.
6. Avoid discussing your issues with just anybody who isn't fit to render good advice to you.
7. If the problem persists, have a family meeting with both parents present.

Before you got married to her please; what really makes her happy? What are her weaknesses? Is she a career person? and What is her family background like?

God bless you for this comment. Somebody finally said something practical instead of lamenting and projecting their emotions onto people they dont know

Thank you so much

I think you should just let her go for the sake of your sanity; the kids will survive. From your narration, she does not sound like someone who can change.

A spouse who can keep a malice for 4 months can kill, and right now to her, you're just just a landlord who doesn't collect any rent.

Sorry

I

Honestly, you are a good Husband provided your write up are true.

Please discuss the issue with her parents or your pastor. I think there are something about her that you're yet to identify.

You need to be prayerful too because base on your write up i can't really see you as a spiritual person and lastly create time to be with your wife, I know your work takes most of your time but, believe me, no woman likes to be alone and besides is when your home is in order that you can enjoy your work.

God will Help you Bro!

stinflame:
I tell u my brother man,if OP would have still been doing all what he was doing to her while dating we won't be having this issues.Such as buying gifts,spending on uncalled for items,In sort just spending money just as we do while dating and most importantly don't put her in a family way.

That is exactly what 80% of girls in that age brackets wants,They are not ready or let me say they don't understand what marriage really means.

They just wants it to be like when you were still dating,they aren't open to the fact that they are to give birth,niece and nephews will be in their house and breach their privacy at least once in a while,also they aren't fully aware they are in a new family.Couple with the fact that the husband is now planning for the future of the kids and hers and so many stuffs.

Girls and boys below that age are the most confuse personalities i have ever seen,as i said earlier 80%.

Not withstanding even some some people above that age still posses such traits but on a lower percentage.
A time will come after marriage Love alone can't keep you but respect will go a long way to.And that is what majority of people above 25 understand deeply.

True. So true. Noted.

Marriage shaa
On a normal, I no fit tolerate such thing oh. You na correct man. Bring in a third party to resolve the issues.If she no still gree, biko divorce her and have peace of mind.

Mrcashman87:
Thanks my dear for your advice , I really appreciate it. The problem with my wife is she doesn’t want to believe there’s something wrong with her. I have tried convincing her several times that she should seek for help , but to her she is perfectly fine. She is mrs perfect she doesn’t see anything wrong in herself but always found something wrong in other people. If she is not ready to get help and what else can I do ?She is great with our kids including her nieces and nephews from her family side , she treats them so well , I have never seen her getting mad at them they way she does with other people children including my nieces . Can u just imagine every Sunday she and our kids goes to church and she will leave my nieces at home because she doesn’t want them inside her car. She will buy the kids clothes and my nieces will be left out , she takes kids out without my nieces but whenever her nieces / nephews are around , I will do everything for them and I don’t treat them any different from my own. I love my wife but I’m tired of her , it’s only my kids that are keeping us together because if it wasn’t for them , I would have abandoned her and the house and move on somewhere else

She knows the children are what is holding you back. It's time to let her know that a split is on the table and shared custody is the ish.

Hope you didn't do court wedding sha.

Move on cause if you die of hypertension or depression kids will get a new uncle sooner than you think.


P.s get some combined help( counselling ), if it fails then strike the final blow and dont look back

A nagging woman?


I'm not surprised at all.. The frustration will make you fed up of life

Itz a pity you didnt do what you are supposed to do at the right time, unfortunately late for you!!!
My point is this; Can you now realise the essence of praying for God to choose spouse for you? Out of your ill love you would say you love her she loves you in the first instance not knowing itz just only a layer that wont last long.

Warning- For the upcoming couples; pray for God's decision, stop chosing with your carnal brain.

Ire o

Modified: kay29000 even before you replied to me, I wanted to remove this because it was too harsh

My annoyance was not particularly directed at you but at all the people in the thread that are quick to label the woman a "mental case" and dismiss a depressive diagnosis without knowing what the signs of depression are

Moreover I find it strange that you could suffer bipolar depression yourself and understand how destructive it can be but still be quick to label another person with an unknown mental problem

My brother so sorry about what is happening to you, it happens like that.
First thing you will know is no model for marriage in the world. Every marriage has its own features, so how you want your marriage look like depends on you. In this sense, fundamental questions needed to be asked: Sit itself down, think about ur 4yrs courtship with her, is there any pretence compared to her real character now? If not, there is something worrying her that is secret, ask her, pet her, beg her, ask her if she still loves you. Ask her what she hates in you. Tell her in a sobber way how you want her behave.
Secondly, are both of you religious? Do u pray together, do you attend same church or mosque, what about fear of God in your home, do u both put Him first, if not, pls try this.
Thirdly, if still the same, pick anyone that you know ur wife likes and respects so much, somebody that has wealth of marriage experience, let him/her talk to her on ur behalf, such person should not be faults finder as well.
Lastly, pls be patient with her, that what makes you love her is still there, capitalize on that and keep working on the strange attitude you dont like in her. she has 3kids for you, separation/divorce, marrying another wife will definitely affect these kids in every side and even your will also change path.

..... But if you have tried all these and nothing changes with time, that you don't have PEACE, after involving both parents on both sides, pls stay away for a while, give her time to think about how she wants her marriage be. But am sure it has not reached this level. I pray may the peace of the Lord rest upon your marriage in Jesus Name.

olabrinks:
I honestly think your wife is suffering from serious depression, she’s not happy deep down inside and they’re some internal issues bothering her. She’s taking it out on you and everyone around her. The problem started once children came into the picture, she’s probably feeling the same regret you are feeling. This is not the time to divorce, this is the time for communication. This is the time for patience. This is the time for understanding. This is the time for wisdom. You are the man of the house, you need to take control of your territory.

If it means her getting help for depression, taking medication such as anti depressants let her do it. If it means going for therapy/counselling, then do it. If it means involving a third party who can transfer wisdom to you, then do it. If it means sitting down and communicating one on one thoroughly then do it. This is not the time to run away from your problems, you will find more problems leaving your wife and children in the long run. Once you cure the root of your problem, you will live peacefully.

He's the man of the house doesn't mean he has no emotion, he has emotion and he has endured it enough, he won't be coming here if he hasn't communicate enough with his wife.

The wife is the problem here(it will be good to hear from the wife's part) and i think the husband can't do anything about it again than to involve elder relatives or a counselor to this before we start hearing cases that touches the heart.

Someone need to sit her down and ask her what exactly is her problem and what does she wants?

chrismymen:
Story story.
My brother you are not alone [color=#000099][/color]

I got married late 2018, I could not live with my wife for even 90days
Our problem start few weeks after weddings, we cant argee on any thing together as husband and wife, I also discovered that most of the things my wife told me about her where lies . Can you image lying with pregnancy, Age, Educational qualifications.( On my mind I done enter 1 chance.)
We start counselling 201 because the once we did before wedding was not enough.
I wanted to make it clear to my wife that lying to me will destroy trust between us which can damage the relationship.
We are in marriage already let us find a ways to make peace and live happily together.

Early this year 2019 Jenuary we had a argument which I did not handle maturely, that was the last time I saw my wife.
What was the arugment about?
I came back from work met her at home early. So I step out to a close friend who live around our house to watch football. When I came back to the house about 9:00 pm, our door was locked, I nocked the door perhaps she has slept off.
I discovered she was not at home.
I called many times but there was no answer.
After about an hour, I sent her a text message that I was out side because I did not go out with my keys. When I called again she answered and said she is coming.
11:pm I was still out side waiting,
I became very anger
When she finally came it was 11.05 pm
Out of anger I collected the keys from her and ask her to go back to where she was coming from.

That was the last time I saw my wife
The family came two weeks later with her to pack her things.
That if I want my wife back, I should come and re-marry her again.
I am 34yr my wife should be 29-31yrs.
Since Jenuary 2019 till now we are not together.
What should I do.

I said in my previous post on this page that if married men opened their mouth, most single guys will say bye bye to marriage. .
The painful part is that we are in the world of women. If you correct then, it is marital violence

I remembered 15years ago, my landlord asked me "why do we have only three landlords in the whole street, others are landlady?". I said l don't know sir. He said when you marry with kids, you will know.

Thanks guys . Yesterday I didn't go back home after work , I booked a hotel ( alone) just wanted to chill and have a stress free night . She called me at 2am wondering where I was and i have told her I'm having fun with friends , she cut the phone . Then she rang numerous times 4am onwards I didn't picked it up . I havnt heard from her since and not looking forward to go back home any time soon.

okewumi:
If we married men opened mouth on what most of us are are passing through in hands of our wife
Most guys will run away from marriage. It is better to marry extrovert than a lady that is calm or gentle during courtship. By the time you marry her and she gives birth, you will see the beast in her.
Don't let me say more that.

Na waoooo...are you serious?

My wife is 29 and I am 32