₦airaland Forum

Amanee:
If you had sense you won't open this thread

Ciao

I won't go that gutter way with you cos that's where you're from.

Ralpdee123:
I have done all these you mentioned nothing has changed....

Now she is justifying her laziness with being my prayer warrior..

Pastor too said I should let him intervene in the matter.... He has tried all he could and given up. He is only telling me for better for worse.

I am asking the pastor if that's what his wife does to him at home..

Keep talking to her. Keep talking to the God that answers prayers to change her. There is something you have not done yet that you are suppose to do. I don't even know what it is but there is something. . If your story has not changed, you have not put in enough effort. Whatever happens, don't give up yet.
.
S

Ralpdee123:
@wtfork....
She did finished oo..... But immediately she finished, the handhout that I paid alot of money for was rolling was on the floor for weeks until my boys started to tear and write jargon on it.... I was like...WTF, isn't this the handbook of the academy you just finished...SMH... So cos you didn't pay a dime for it abii.....


Till date her OND result isn't out after I paid year 1,2&3. After months of asking, she told me she had some issue with one course. I remember awalys telling her to take her study seriously, she'll only grin and laugh then carry GOTV remote.....

She later asked me to come and pay extra yet school fee.... I told her to go meet are parent cos they are still alive...... Then she calls me a bad person that she can't leave her husbands out to go back to her parents....

P.S.

I am not discussing my family's issue outside, it's shamefu to discuss with my folks reason I created this moniker...... Because I am already planning to stay away from the house.... Cos she'll say this house is her... And I don't want to make evening newspaper's headline.........

Well I don't know what year she claimed she finished but what I know is most institutions issue out certificates just a year after graduation..

If she is requesting for payment of extra year fees that means she is not a graduate yet and should not expect any degree yet until completion.

To confirm the status of certificate thing. U can relate with any of her friends in sch. Or u just Google track the record office number of the sch she attended and make inquiries about the certificate stating her year if admission and graduation for perfect result.

Don't leave ur house yet !
Time never reach !!

Ralpdee123:
Uncle Lala...
Please help move for wider response.....

I feel marriage have scammed me...

Maybe it's the heat getting to me this period as I can't seem to wrap my head around this your tale.

I eventually visited and she explained how it all happened,I said no wahala... Being the first time we were seeing after a long time, I didn't make any attempt to sex her as that wasn't my priority. She left my place and I accompanied her to the busstop to leave, while there she brought up an issue like she wants me to touch her or something like that..... We returned to my room and boom it happend.... I came in all over her...etc..

Another tales by moonlight?

Amanee:
If you had sense you won't open this thread

Ciao

the guy is an idiot!

Ralpdee123:
I have done all these you mentioned nothing has changed....

Now she is justifying her laziness with being my prayer warrior..

Pastor too said I should let him intervene in the matter.... He has tried all he could and given up. He is only telling me for better for worse.

I am asking the pastor if that's what his wife does to him at home..

Forget the pastor, I keep telling people, pastors will always be pastors. Do you expect the pastor to tell you to divorce your wife, when he preaches 'till death do you part' on the pulpit. Even if the pastor knows in his heart that he would end the marriage if he were in your shoes, he wouldn't say it to you, he will keep telling you what is expected of him as a pastor.

Try to know what she really is interested in, I don't think likes that catering stuff, secondly stop getting her pregnant, you are struggling and at the same time adding more burden to your life.

Wishing you all the best.

cool down Bro. you are in already there is no way out, not after having two children for you, that will make you a coward, it's a Man's burden learn to live with it and also learn to manage ur wife the way she is .

Ralpdee123:
@Ladylite,

Thinks for your sensible contribution..... As you can see my long epistle is not copy and paste. Infact I can't explain everything as it would be too long to read....

I have legalized the marriage at ikoyi registry so we are married legally... That was what they told her to do..I feel really trickked to have gone this far but my happiness is what matters to me at this point cos the deed has been done already.


She now use my kids as bait to get at me.... Not wanting to admit her weaknesses. I told her family people, her aunt came to my house to enquire what happened, she said she didn't do anything that they should ask me what she did....I honestly couldn't say a thing because I didn't know where to start from.....

I still buy food evrydyay on my way out and way home....she is secretive and self centred. She prefers to watch Zee world and the list goes on and on....

I make over 200k a month no bragging.... 2 kids my slcousin sister, and my wife.... I spend all my earnings on food and bills.......


I feel very sick recently, that was when it dawned on me because during this time there was nothing coming in and she still wants me to bring more money..... I am scared for my kids cos this woman can not pay even 20k sch fees if anything had happened to me....

I am considering the option of taking care of my kids from a far.... My only concern....


Pastor is just telling me one for better and for worse Scam talk....


I am dying inside and someone is telling me that..

The Bible never said for better or worse o. Anyway.... Kindly consider separating without divorce first to see if she will change. But don't let the children suffer.

MedicH:
Guy will u even be alive to see next year because ur situation is the number one cause of death among men. You let yourself got scammed just like that. Pls what's special about this lady? Is she not the same Naija woman I see everyday u know just roaming nothing serious no ambition. How did u end up like this? Does she use jazz u know like witchcraft and bad luck which they wear in waist beads? My niggar what happened? I am in my mid 20s just like u no girlfriend just my career and my side hustle and living fine like it's a miracle. I have many plans and the first which I call vision 2020 is leaving this country. You don't think about anything else man. When the family told u about fees why did I agree? What's in that woman that made u agree? What stupid course is she studying not even like medicine or nursing that u chose to mortgage ur life in support of a futile academic journey dead on arrival. Why? Guy why? Why? You Bleep up. My double hustle give me at least 600k a month but I find it very hard to bring a girl home. Why did u fall for this scam. When she said she was raped why didn't u play along. Bring in a police man so it looks like u want to press charges and let the truth come out. Why did u allow urself to be used this way. Now the union has kids u were busy getting her pregnant when u have nothing. Before me self get a lady pregnant eeh even that child will not be born in Nigeria I think my kids deserve a better passport and citizenship not a cursed place. Guy why don't u think about urself first. If I were u I will quit Jesus I can't be u. Pls quit. Call it off whatever it is. Tell any idiot that cares to listen you're done. I can't believe this. Take the kids to ur mother and keep them there and let this God forsaken women go to hell is she wants. She deceived u and stole ur life sway goddamnit

I beg, what type of hustle u dey do, introduce me. I wan earn like you. 600k a month

vicben27:
cool down Bro. you are in already there is no way out, not after having two children for you, that will make you a coward, it's a Man's burden learn to live with it and also learn to manage ur wife the way she is .

Bullshiiit

You are literally telling him to throw his life away and exit the world a loser because of some lazy girl.

Bros turn this story to movie. It would make a good watch.

Bros I cant even imagine this, but prioritizing your life matters here...
Chaiii... Manipulation at its peak

Bro, u beta be close to God

KevinDein:
Bullshiiit

You are literally telling him to throw his life away and exit the world a loser because of some lazy girl.

chill Bro ur also literally telling him to throw away the future of his children, since she doesn't want to be serious he is of a more stronger character and will, let him set up other forms of business and get people to run it. while he make profit, his wife can be there producing Bebies. he saw as this from the beginning and still went ahead we should be responsible for what ever decision we make in life

Hmmmm...I read everything from the beginning to the end..I feel for you man...!!! The elders/married men in romance section should come in ASAP...!!!!! I'm still a bachelor..

Just like I would always say, WHY CAN’T Y’ALL GET A LATEX HANDY

In a country where hypocrites are seen as righteous, everybody will rather not walk into a pharmacy and get a latex but will be busying collecting penis or vagina skin to skin on the background given the slightest opportunity
Konji is a bastard and also not a respecter of nobody, until this reality sinks in, issues like this will continue to be on the rise everyday
It’s better to have a latex handy and be tagged a playboy, cos the same lady that tagged you a playboy will appreciate the usefulness of that same latex when Konji sets in

Really hurts me that this guy is in this big mess that could easily be avoided
OP your problem is really a tough one, cos it’s not just about you two, kids are involved now and every action you take will affect them directly. Still, marriage isn’t a do or die affair cos nobody wants to be in a marriage that will take their head. Continue seeking counsel and don’t let emotions cloud your decision making.



#My_Truth

totosucker:
Keep talking to her. Keep talking to the God that answers prayers to change her. There is something you have not done yet that you are suppose to do. I don't even know what it is but there is something. . If your story has not changed, you have not put in enough effort. Whatever happens, don't give up yet.
.
S

what sort of stupid advice is this for God's sake naa

vicben27:
cool down Bro. you are in already there is no way out, not after having two children for you, that will make you a coward, it's a Man's burden learn to live with it and also learn to manage ur wife the way she is .

walai this person is mad
how old are u

Chaii Nawa o
Wetin I no go see

Ralpdee123:
Thanks @Bukatyne.....
Like I said, I meet at her during my finals approximately 7years..... She was already pregnant as I was leaving school... And we've been living together since then till date.....

The only thing that has remain constant is her inability to get something doing and her justification is that she's been praying for me all these years.....WTF...

I have always wanted to support her career in the best way I can but she is bereft of any. She'll rather argue with me.... My little cousin came to live with us and 3 years ago, now she's graduated from fashion school and can make cloths very well.... And my wife is yet to find anything to do.......

I share my aspirations with her to motivate and encourage her but this one no one move even if you push her......


I am a frustrated man I swear......

How can I help my kids.... Cos I will work away soon and never come back.....

Sorry for the frustration, I am sure it is hell when your spouse is not on the same page.

I have given my advise on the earlier post.

Gold Circle 100 bucks could have saved us all this epistle. So Long A Lamentation.

olril17:
walai this person is mad how old are u

I'm an elder with experience

vicben27:
I'm an elder with experience

yes sir..I can see that..

Houseofglam7:
I didn't read the part where you actually got married!!!
Am I missing something here

Anyways, I have absolutely nothing to tell ya.
Fix your life

u and amanee u lack sence if u cant advise him get lost

Ralpdee123:
I won't go that gutter way with you cos that's where you're from.

am sorry u are not a man yet u still have a baby brain.am very angry as I read ur story. why let ur woman control u like DAT? I agree is good u didnt spoil DAT first belle but why marry her wen u are not rich enuf still in skool.why train her in skool and in catering skool wen her father didnt do DAT how can u get wife DAT refuse to wash for u or didnt cook for u. can u be a man and dicipline her.if u beat once or twice she wont do DAT rubbish again.if u dump her now wat will happen to ur kids.I think u have to be hard on her now so she change.

jakandeola:
u and amanee u lack sence if u cant advise him get lost

In a bid to sound reasonable, you totally shot yourself in the foot.
Bye bozo

Can this be real

Take the.children to your mother or any family member because obviously she can't take care of them
You love with your heart instead of your head

Ralpdee123:
Good morning Nairalanders,
I am tired of my marriage and I am considering divorcing my wife of 8 years. I need mature advice either........

Please pardon my grammatical blunders....

I met this Lady at the banking all 7 years ago, it was love at first sight. I approached her and poom! we exchanged numbers, we talked briefly and said she resided in Abuja and would be returning in a week so we decided to meet at an eatery before she leaved.

We met and discussed about life aspirations and all that, I told her how I wished we get along and God willing we get married. Then she responded saying that do I know I have to be hardworking and responsible of I'm truly serious about marriage etc. I said I ma trying that things we fall in place.........

The Lies:
1)
She travelled and we kept in touch through text messages and calls etc... She told me she was a virgin and had broke up with her bf bla bla....then i had promised to come and see her in few months time to reassure how I'm serious about her....blabla...... 2 weeks before my travel day to meet her, she called on evening and started crying over the phone, what happened, I enquired, she said she was RAPED by her ex BF... Oh gosh! How come? he trickked me over to his place and it happened..... I got mad and fasttrackked my going to meet her..........

2)
I eventually visited and she explained how it all happened,I said no wahala... Being the first time we were seeing after a long time, I didn't make any attempt to sex her as that wasn't my priority. She left my place and I accompanied her to the busstop to leave, while there she brought up an issue like she wants me to touch her or something like that..... We returned to my room and boom it happend.... I came in all over her...etc.. 3 weeks later, she told me she missed her period and was pregnant... I was in 300l at this time.... I was like oh....OK... Save this preg! We would. Find away around telling our parents bla bla.......
Girl said no that she would have do abort it.... I said no pls don't.... And one even she called that her friend took her to a place and she has terminated the pregy... I felt bad......

3)
Hide and Lied about the status of her parents and families.... As she was telling me, I was informing my siblings... Now that everything is done it was hard to do the damage control cos mum and everyone thinks I have been lying all along.....

Relocate to Lagos......
She finally moved to Lag and this time I was in my final year.... While writing my finals she called that she is pregnant... This time real pregnancy.... I said live it.... Not that that was the next thing but for the love that had beclouded my sense of reasoning at that time..... I manage to get 1 room sef apartment in Lagos so I have a sense of independence, not that I was planning anything marriage......my wife began to bring in her things one by one and before I knew what was happining, it was hard to let go....... Technically, she don get belle.... And I don marry wife automatically.........

From School to Marriage:

It was he'll for me becos I was around 25/26 around this time, mum c was complaining bitterly that I am not ready for for this, and dad to left me with my stubbornness..... So I struggled with this lady.... I told her that we can work around all these things and still come out good.....

Meeting her Parents & Her Education:
One of her big aunt has been the brain behind manipulating me to marry her and bla bla... She took me to see her parents, my one parent ain't aware of shit.... There they brain washed me that I was the Afesona... Like Fiance and etc.... Father told me that I will take responsibility from that moment on....... At that time she had a failed admission that I later knew about.......... Then I said PT program would be a nice option.... Yaba or Laspotech... The Dad told me that it's easier said than done because if tomorrow comes now and they are asking for school fees we I should count him out..... I'm like OK Daddy, the first school fees is a bit much, pay half lemme pay half and the subsequent onces I will pay..... Daddy refused to pay o..... I ended up using my house rent that I saved for about 6 months to pay for the school fees....... And the real issue began......
Weekly tfare, feeding, handouts, test, assignment bills I come lean like Dryfish..... No joy at all... A young grad like me.......my life was upside down....

Setting Up Business for her:

I later called her and told her the load is too much for me that she should start to do something to support us.... She was studying business admin at this time, I said she should learn a trade that she will later blend in with her Business admin....she said catering would be cool and we both agreed.... I searched for another money to send her to catering school again....now she is doing OND and catering school together plus pregnancy...... My both eyes went hollow and I am permanently stressed at that time......life became unbearable and I encouraged myself that it's only. Matter of time...... My wife delivered at the last month of the catering school.... Then the stress of a baby.....set in... Wife isn't working.....

I started Noticing her Laziness:

After 6 months, I told her to return to round up her catering school, get her certificate and start something...she said yes and it ends there....she didn't go.... Months after she said that academy is bad they didn't teach them well bla bla....that she wants to go to another Catering institute..... Then I told her to search..... For 6moths madam didn't see any, I had to do it myself.... Than I saw one of the top catering institute in Maryland, I paid oh.... Practicals, this and that..... I went broke again.....

After the course, I took her to the market bought almost all catering equipment and did a comcard and etcs... Madam pretended for a month and she abandoned everything........

Laziness Continues:
She insisted my cousin sister should come live with us, most of the times, it is my cousin that do all the cleaning, washing, bathing the kids etc... She will just sit down in one angle and that will be all.... When I talk, she would just laugh and that is all.....


Can't Cook & Wants me to eat any crap she cooks like that..
I have resorted to buying cooked food on my way home cos I most times take to spoons of her served meal and I would lost appetite completely.... Then I will go hungry and lean as a result.... I can't come and kill myself..... Untop someone that don't give a dam about me.......

Pregnant again:

Immediately my boy clocks two I told her that before any pregnancy, I have to set her up first so that the burden would be free a bit....... She said OK.... And few months after she went on admission only to tell me that she's pregnant again.....

Long story short: I am tired of the marriage right now..
What should I do...


Pardon my very long epistle..........

u been dey tink wit ur prick,one ur brain don begin function

What is this? What kind of a stupid boy are you? We have one family friend like you that almost died because of this type of stupidity. Chase her back to her father. Start taking care of your children from a distance. re-evaluate your life, you are too weak for my liking. You married a manipulator. In fact, I want to hear her own part of the story. Nobody deserves to be in this type of relationship. You think you are better than those that suffered heart attack. Why can't you control your penis? Stop already.

Ralpdee123:
Good morning Nairalanders,
I am tired of my marriage and I am considering divorcing my wife of 8 years. I need mature advice either........

Please pardon my grammatical blunders....

I met this Lady at the banking all 7 years ago, it was love at first sight. I approached her and poom! we exchanged numbers, we talked briefly and said she resided in Abuja and would be returning in a week so we decided to meet at an eatery before she leaved.

We met and discussed about life aspirations and all that, I told her how I wished we get along and God willing we get married. Then she responded saying that do I know I have to be hardworking and responsible of I'm truly serious about marriage etc. I said I ma trying that things we fall in place.........

The Lies:
1)
She travelled and we kept in touch through text messages and calls etc... She told me she was a virgin and had broke up with her bf bla bla....then i had promised to come and see her in few months time to reassure how I'm serious about her....blabla...... 2 weeks before my travel day to meet her, she called on evening and started crying over the phone, what happened, I enquired, she said she was RAPED by her ex BF... Oh gosh! How come? he trickked me over to his place and it happened..... I got mad and fasttrackked my going to meet her..........

2)
I eventually visited and she explained how it all happened,I said no wahala... Being the first time we were seeing after a long time, I didn't make any attempt to sex her as that wasn't my priority. She left my place and I accompanied her to the busstop to leave, while there she brought up an issue like she wants me to touch her or something like that..... We returned to my room and boom it happend.... I came in all over her...etc.. 3 weeks later, she told me she missed her period and was pregnant... I was in 300l at this time.... I was like oh....OK... Save this preg! We would. Find away around telling our parents bla bla.......
Girl said no that she would have do abort it.... I said no pls don't.... And one even she called that her friend took her to a place and she has terminated the pregy... I felt bad......

3)
Hide and Lied about the status of her parents and families.... As she was telling me, I was informing my siblings... Now that everything is done it was hard to do the damage control cos mum and everyone thinks I have been lying all along.....

Relocate to Lagos......
She finally moved to Lag and this time I was in my final year.... While writing my finals she called that she is pregnant... This time real pregnancy.... I said live it.... Not that that was the next thing but for the love that had beclouded my sense of reasoning at that time..... I manage to get 1 room sef apartment in Lagos so I have a sense of independence, not that I was planning anything marriage......my wife began to bring in her things one by one and before I knew what was happining, it was hard to let go....... Technically, she don get belle.... And I don marry wife automatically.........

From School to Marriage:

It was he'll for me becos I was around 25/26 around this time, mum c was complaining bitterly that I am not ready for for this, and dad to left me with my stubbornness..... So I struggled with this lady.... I told her that we can work around all these things and still come out good.....

Meeting her Parents & Her Education:
One of her big aunt has been the brain behind manipulating me to marry her and bla bla... She took me to see her parents, my one parent ain't aware of shit.... There they brain washed me that I was the Afesona... Like Fiance and etc.... Father told me that I will take responsibility from that moment on....... At that time she had a failed admission that I later knew about.......... Then I said PT program would be a nice option.... Yaba or Laspotech... The Dad told me that it's easier said than done because if tomorrow comes now and they are asking for school fees we I should count him out..... I'm like OK Daddy, the first school fees is a bit much, pay half lemme pay half and the subsequent onces I will pay..... Daddy refused to pay o..... I ended up using my house rent that I saved for about 6 months to pay for the school fees....... And the real issue began......
Weekly tfare, feeding, handouts, test, assignment bills I come lean like Dryfish..... No joy at all... A young grad like me.......my life was upside down....

Setting Up Business for her:

I later called her and told her the load is too much for me that she should start to do something to support us.... She was studying business admin at this time, I said she should learn a trade that she will later blend in with her Business admin....she said catering would be cool and we both agreed.... I searched for another money to send her to catering school again....now she is doing OND and catering school together plus pregnancy...... My both eyes went hollow and I am permanently stressed at that time......life became unbearable and I encouraged myself that it's only. Matter of time...... My wife delivered at the last month of the catering school.... Then the stress of a baby.....set in... Wife isn't working.....

I started Noticing her Laziness:

After 6 months, I told her to return to round up her catering school, get her certificate and start something...she said yes and it ends there....she didn't go.... Months after she said that academy is bad they didn't teach them well bla bla....that she wants to go to another Catering institute..... Then I told her to search..... For 6moths madam didn't see any, I had to do it myself.... Than I saw one of the top catering institute in Maryland, I paid oh.... Practicals, this and that..... I went broke again.....

After the course, I took her to the market bought almost all catering equipment and did a comcard and etcs... Madam pretended for a month and she abandoned everything........

Laziness Continues:
She insisted my cousin sister should come live with us, most of the times, it is my cousin that do all the cleaning, washing, bathing the kids etc... She will just sit down in one angle and that will be all.... When I talk, she would just laugh and that is all.....


Can't Cook & Wants me to eat any crap she cooks like that..
I have resorted to buying cooked food on my way home cos I most times take to spoons of her served meal and I would lost appetite completely.... Then I will go hungry and lean as a result.... I can't come and kill myself..... Untop someone that don't give a dam about me.......

Pregnant again:

Immediately my boy clocks two I told her that before any pregnancy, I have to set her up first so that the burden would be free a bit....... She said OK.... And few months after she went on admission only to tell me that she's pregnant again.....

Long story short: I am tired of the marriage right now..
What should I do...


Pardon my very long epistle..........

Bro ladies Sabi use "AM STILL A VIRGIN" scam guys die because dem know say once we hear say dem na FRESH TOTO we no fit think straight again.......

Guys beware. If a babe claims being a VIRGIN make you demand STRONGLY say you wan crosscheck. 98% OF TIMES TURNS OUT TO BE A LIE.