₦airaland Forum

Omar09:
I was having a chat with my Kenyan friend a girl. And we were talking, somehow we went into the job aspect and she told me to get a job, I told her I didn't need one that I have a girl who is paying me to date her tho small. And that I'm on the look out for another lady who can pay higher in essence I'm into sugar momma thingy. And she said what happens to the other one if I get a new one. I told her I'd dump her. And she told me never to talk to her, I replied OK. 5min went by and she sent me a text and asked me why I didn't defend myself or beg. I laughed out loud. She said another thing that it takes a real man to beg a woman. I didn't even want to go into arguments with her.

Imagine that I should beg cause I want to be her definition of a REAL MAN. Why?

meaning because of that u are now real man hmm please can you tell me ur definition of real man

Thank you brother, it is as simple as that, e dey pain me say na me carry my head dey read too much negativity for this section honestly.

healthserve:
Nice try with the psychological deflection. That was how the P Square brothers thought till they got served. Prince Harry also followed this same line of thought till he got served too. Men should be men simple. Itsbehat this is all about

Alpha males turns out.to be proud people, autocratic leaders like Lates Gadaffi, Saddam Hussein, Osama Bin Laden, Idia Min etc. While Beta Males turns out to be humble. They are leaders that listens to their people eg are Clinton, Jimmy Carter, many men of God etc.

Make money and be alpha male

TonyeBarcanista:
Of course, you should know where I belong

ok u beta male then.

For me it's better to be little Alpha and little beta because everything in this life have advantages and disadvantages

Oh my God! I never knew I am an ALPHA MALE

DexterousOne:
You know one thing is that more often than not

It's the women wanting to define who "men" are when.they have never been a man a day in their life


Men don't do this in wholesale

It's always women

Only men know what and who men are and should be

"A tiger doesn't proclaim it's tigritude". There's no trying to.prove to anyone that it's a tiger when it's clear. If it's a rat, it will be evident.

This fight to be seen as an alpha is evident that the qualities and features are not actually there.

prinsam30:
my first heartbreak thought me a bitter lesson and ever since then av been Alpha Male, no time for dulling

Are you sure you are now an alpha male? What makes you one?

djon78:
And you haven't seen men with money women play like a puppet.
Men that just use only money to attract women most times end up with gold diggers
Just yesterday a close friend was telling me of his close pal that married a woman and placed her on salary . He was working a very high paying job. The chick was a stunner/beautiful. Guy man later lost his high paying job. Chick went back to her people, that she will return when things turn around.

Money can't cover your inadequacies

And mind you even rich people can go through a down time. You may have plenty today but money is not constant

Even billionaires go bankrupt
Everyone needs money but money can't cover your weakness/inadequacies.
It must show one way or the other

In Nigeria we think it's just money money but most times money attract to you gold diggers, women with uncouth character, women on the lowest level of intelligence, who can't add any value to your life.


Had an oga/menror then whose wife was an Exxon Mobil top engineer. Dude was controlling all her money, in fact her salary account he controls it and decides how it will be used.
He had absolutely nothing. From her earnings he started a highly lucrative business. Today that man is worth 100s of millions, very big man. His wife's earnings no near half his own now.
He was my mentor through me a lot about relationship. A no nonsense man, still running his family excellently.
There is nothing like being with a smart woman that respects and adores you. It takes more than money to arrange that kind of package. You must be a real man not simp

I don't think they are talking about idiots with money...men whose thought processes are only linked to their bulges. Or those that lack discretion. They are doomed to crumble.

TonyeBarcanista:
Those threads humor me bro. Imagine someone reporting his mother and wife on Nairaland forum

. Oga, na dia u go fia o.

Hw did this reach fp

saintneo:
TonyeBarcanista,

You are just saying Alpha male is a Choleric-majority personality.

True! Finally!!

This alpha male thing that is becoming a trend on NL like Marlians is not new. That was my comment, that they are just personality types like cholerics, phlegm, Sanguine, melancholy and a combination of them.

I read Tim Lahaye's Why You Act The Way You Do over a decade ago and it seems some people are just waking up and playing around with names...alpha, beta, lol.

They will all be fine

ericsmith:
I think he said it all for the alpha males ... as for me i don't even knw where i belong becos i do things as "the spirit leads". another thing i notice is people around me like whatever i like buh whateva people like i just lost interest 4 it. maybe i belong to the "crazymales" .

. Ha! “Crazymale“ thats another one. I think you really belong to the “FUNNYmales“. As for Me, I dont have interest in what most men do. Such as Drinking, Smoking or Chasing girls. Maybe I belong to the “RESERVEDmales“.

Can we please stop with these stupid toxic masculinity? All these qualities are to be developed by everybody

Palehair:
Can we please stop with these stupid toxic masculinity? All these qualities are to be developed by everybody

And you don't feel your points contradicts itself. They are qualities that should be developed individually, it is toxic. Smh.

Preshy561:
Some of you who call your fellow guys pussy think it means weakness?
Something that strong enough to pull out a human being, undergo so many pressure and still bounces, a place you came out from, is what you think means weakness? It really shows you are a representative of such weakness.

. CHEI! This lady don come with another wahala o. Me, I no just dey here now again sef. I TAKE A STROLL.

healthserve:
Nice try with the psychological deflection. That was how the P Square brothers thought till they got served. Prince Harry also followed this same line of thought till he got served too. Men should be men simple. Itsbehat this is all about

No, men should define the men that they want to be and not pressurized into following a whole set of rules. A real man does whatever the Bleep he wants as long as no one gets hurt, that there is the first rule of being a man

Palehair:
No, men should define the men that they want to be and not pressurized into following a whole set of rules. A real man does whatever the Bleep he wants as long as no one gets hurt, that there is the first rule of being a man

No one puts performance pressure on anyone. It's like many relationship and life hacks. These are just viewpoints and nothing more. You're the one breathing out fire over nothing. You're hyperventilating on what you should either ignore or walk away from. I don't see any man harmed in anyway for saying men should be masculine and have theig own interests in whatever arrangements they find themselves

Stop taking things too hard

When men start living for mediocre things like money,sex,drugs,material possessions,validation, they lose their real worth(alpha male).

Alpha male=disunity,diagreement and eventually seperation cum divorce in relationships/marriages, at a point of being your alpha male people will even misunderstand you and you will be having problems every where you go including your house also exposing yourself to suffer suffer, bc if I am your girlfriend or wife I will allow you use your alphacity to provide everything. I think I prefer that beta maleoooo, there is nothing we are dragging for esp with your loved ones,bcs you can do that alpha male for your loved ones of course you can't do it outside people will slam you with special hatred so what's the point.

healthserve:
No one puts performance pressure on anyone. It's like many relationship and life hacks. These are just viewpoints and nothing more. You're the one breathing out fire over nothing. You're hyperventilating on what you should either ignore or walk away from. I don't see any man harmed in anyway for saying men should be masculine and have theig own interests in whatever arrangements they find themselves

Stop taking things too hard

Defining the standard of a man with the term "alpha male" is a polluted sphere of masculinity and making a man feel inferior because they don't adhere to your version of masculinity is quite toxic. Let men breathe, live and define their masculinity without feeling less than who they are

kodix:
Alpha male=disunity,diagreement and eventually seperation cum divorce in relationships/marriages, at a point of being your alpha male people will even misunderstand you and you will be having problems every where you go including your house also exposing yourself to suffer suffer, bc if I am your girlfriend or wife I will allow you use your alphacity to provide everything. I think I prefer that beta maleoooo, there is nothing we are dragging for esp with your loved ones,bcs you can do that alpha male for your loved ones of course you can't do it outside people will slam you with special hatred so what's the point.

I wish I could like this a billion times, in the former, you are stiff, uptight and you totally think you have something to prove and a height you must achieve but in the former, you are relaxed in all forms, you are like water only in this case, you make your own shapes. Some women find it sexy for men who kick into their feminine side, next we hear, "alpha make" don't she'd tears

Palehair:
Defining the standard of a man with the term "alpha male" is a polluted sphere of masculinity and making a man feel inferior because they don't adhere to your version of masculinity is quite toxic. Let men breathe, live and define their masculinity without feeling less than who they are

No one has ever defined anything


The thread and comments simply says men should try to be alpha. Nothing more. I don't see anyone making anything a standard or anyone making men feel inadequate. You're seeing things that aren't there bro


Speka with men and get to know more about the pains of men in toxic unions. You'll understand what this speaks about better

TonyeBarcanista:
By Tonyebarcanista

Most people falsely misconstrue Alpha males to be irresponsible men filled with arrogance and are disrespectful towards women. They misconstrue Alpha males with with cocky males.

Many also misconstrue guys that are body builders with nice physique to be alpha males. Some misconstrue wealthy and fierce looking men as alpha males. Some even misconstrue womanizers, famous or people of high status to be alpha males. While some alpha males may belong to the aforementioned groups, not all those groups are alpha males.

Who Is An Alpha Male?
An Alpha male is the real man. He is a man's man and a warrior. He is very confident and a stand-up guy. Irrespective of what you call him, he is a leader. He is the guy others look up to for motivation, inspiration, and often with a hint of jealousy. He is a man that knows what he wants, confident of himself and can't be tossed around. The alpha male knows his power as a man and doesn't use it as tool for oppression. He can't be manipulated by women, and this makes him attracted to women. He's the kind of man every woman want. The Alpha male is mentally and emotionally strong but kind. He is very Confident, yet humble, he assertive, yet gentle at times. He is very powerful, yet calm and tempered. He has self worth yet doesn't proud! He is the kind of man every man should be. He is the kind of man that every woman crave for and hold in high esteem.

Who Is A Beta Male?
Beta males are men that always seek to fit in. They are the typical human pleasers with little or no opinion. Beta males in relationship and marriages are the typical Mr Nice Guys that always bury their thought, desire and want so as not to offend their partners. They are typical followers that always seek to blend with the society. They are not stand alone guys as they are easily manipulated. Because of these traits, Beta males are often disrespected and controlled by their partners, the society, their church, families etcetera.

ALPHA MALES VS BETA MALES

1. In Relationship
Alpha males go for who and what they want, and are men with standards. When their partners err, they are not afraid to speak their mind, address the problem and speak up when the boundaries they set are crossed. They inform their partners on the effect of their ill informed, they tell their partners the consequences on the relationship and take action to ensure that the partner falls in line. Alpha males don't seek conflicts but are not afraid to tackle conflict head on. They are active and not passive

But Beta males don't have any standard nor boundaries that they hold sacred. They would rather endure and die in silence when their partners err because they are afraid of causing conflict in their relationship. The ones that speak up do so in form of a plea or nag. They are passive men that live with burden in their heart in their bid to maintain peace that they never get.

2. Gentlemen Vs Mr Nice Guys
Alpha males are polite, nice to others, respectful but respects themselves and aren't doormat; Alpha male will never allow anyone treat him like second fiddle no matter what. An Alpha male priories his own well-being, irrespective, he genuinely care about the needs of the people in his life and want the best for others. He does this not do this for validation, to gain attention or to be praised by people around him, he simply does it because it is the right thing to do. When an Alpha male doesn't agree with you, he tells you.

Beta males on the other hand may be nice, courteous etc, but they don't prioritise themselves. They are doormat, Yes-man. They are nice because they need the validation and they agree to a fault because they want to maintain the "Mr Nice Guy" tag.

3. Beta Males Are Bitchy, Alpha males Accepts or Change A Situation:
Alpha males takes responsibility for their lives. Once anything happens in their lives, an Alpha male seeks to do something about it. If an Alpha male finds his partner with another man, he takes action- whether to breakup with her or any other action. An Alpha male makes decision for himself; whether relationship, career or whatever.

But Beta males always look at someone to pass blame on. They don't take responsibility, they bitch over it. A Beta male will find his partner in an unpleasant situation with another man, he runs to his pastor, family or social media to bitch about it... Seeking their help to take action because "he doesn't want to act irrationally". He's a weak man! Simple!!!

4. Genuine Connection Vs validation
An Alpha male always seek genuine connection and friendship with their partners and people around them. They have no time for fake relationship. Alpha males don't seek anybody's validation to feel good. They are true to themselves.

Beta males are pretenders. They desire validation of their partners, friends and society to feel good about themselves. They are fake towards themselves and others around them because they suppress their true feelings for external validation.

5. Alpha males trust themselves to make decisions for their lives, Beta males follow popular opinion.

An alpha male may consult others before making decision, he evaluates the response he gets, and compare with what he had always wanted to do. If he still believe that his desires is the best for him ahead of popular opinion, he follows his mind, makes his decision and swim or sink with it without blaming others.

Beta males consults with people, he may or may not evaluate responses, but he follows popular opinion even if it doesn't tally what he really wants because of his conformist character. He is always ready to blame others should his decision not turn out the way he wishes.

I will stop here!

I remain TonyeBarcanista

What about beta-alpha males?

OK now , who is a gamma male?

healthserve:
No one has ever defined anything


The thread and comments simply says men should try to be alpha. Nothing more. I don't see anyone making anything a standard

Yes... you don't advice men to be alpha males, it's just bland and makes them think they are inferior which in turn affects most mental health

healthserve:
No one has ever defined anything


The thread and comments simply says men should try to be alpha. Nothing more. I don't see anyone making anything a standard or anyone making men feel inadequate. You're seeing things that aren't there bro


Speka with men and get to know more about the pains of men in toxic unions. You'll understand what this speaks about better

Masculinity has nothing to do with toxic relationships. It happens in both parties

Palehair:
Yes... you don't advice men to be alpha males, it's just bland and makes them think they are inferior which in turn affects most mental health

Lol. How old are you. I repeat the thread and many comments says men should arrive to be alpha same way a religious person would say strive to be Holy which I don't see in anyway should affects a person's psyche. You're just trying to fault-find, criticise without careful consideration of your objections

Palehair:
Masculinity has nothing to do with toxic relationships. It happens in both parties

Quit the psychological deflections. No one had pitched men against women or alpha against beta. It's pure information. If it's not for you, let it be. Simple. Let's stop taking in information with a combative psyche. I see no reason for a fuss

healthserve:
Same as me crazy males. But I ain't gonna let any woman walk over me. Never

You: But I ain't gonna let any woman walk over me. Never

Woman: But I ain't gonna let any man walk over me. Never

Fin.

healthserve:
Quit the psychological deflections. No one had pitched men against women or alpha against beta. It's pure information. If it's not for you, let it be. Simple. Let's stop taking in information with a combative psyche. I see no reason for a fuss

It's on a public forum so it's for everybody to critic. Let's just agree to disagree