You are a great person. If not yet, you will be,may God continue to bless you with wisdom and understanding.

donstan18:
Traditionally, a man is the chief sponsor of any wedding ceremony while the woman supports in a way she can. Reason, it's expected a man goes into marriage when financially stable and ready.

Allocating 50% to her passed a message that you'll be a type of husband who will be after the statistics of the wife's earning and spending. You sure wouldn't have done what you did if you hadn't any knowledge of her earning, you acted because you know her earning and that's a red flag for Nigerian ladies, because they don't like dragging and equal responsibilities in a home.

You don't go direct when you want a woman to contribute financially to something. You go Tactically[Not imposing, but asking how and where she can take care of, she'll choose, no matter the percentage of her choice, you lock up, keep the planning going, pretend like you are cool and then sketch out a personal plan of how to act worried and restless before her, she'll wanna know the problem, act like you wanna hide it from her, she'll be worried and pissed that you are hiding things from her, then you'll come up with a story and open up that you are facing financial crisis and don't know how to sort some things out concerning the wedding, she'll willingly help with pity without seeing you as a stingy or mean person]

No be everything dem dey form mancho, you go dey use your head.

You've spent on traditional wedding and for that not to be a total waste, kindly go and meet her, reason with her and go tactical, not directly with authority.

Happy married life in advance!

donstan18:


You don't go direct when you want a woman to contribute financially to something. You go Tactically[Not imposing, but asking how and where she can take care of, she'll choose, no matter the percentage of her choice, you lock up, keep the planning going, pretend like you are cool and then sketch out a personal plan of how to act worried and restless before her, she'll wanna know the problem, act like you wanna hide it from her, she'll be worried and pissed that you are hiding things from her, then you'll come up with a story and open up that you are facing financial crisis and don't know how to sort some things out concerning the wedding, she'll willingly help with pity without seeing you as a stingy or mean person]

No be everything dem dey form mancho, you go dey use your head.

Egbon! I salute your wisdom.

donstan18:
Traditionally, a man is the chief sponsor of any wedding ceremony while the woman supports in a way she can. Reason, it's expected a man goes into marriage when financially stable and ready.

Allocating 50% to her passed a message that you'll be a type of husband who will be after the statistics of the wife's earning and spending. You sure wouldn't have done what you did if you hadn't any knowledge of her earning, you acted because you know her earning and that's a red flag for Nigerian ladies, because they don't like dragging and equal responsibilities in a home.

You don't go direct when you want a woman to contribute financially to something. You go Tactically[Not imposing, but asking how and where she can take care of, she'll choose, no matter the percentage of her choice, you lock up, keep the planning going, pretend like you are cool and then sketch out a personal plan of how to act worried and restless before her, she'll wanna know the problem, act like you wanna hide it from her, she'll be worried and pissed that you are hiding things from her, then you'll come up with a story and open up that you are facing financial crisis and don't know how to sort some things out concerning the wedding, she'll willingly help with pity without seeing you as a stingy or mean person]

No be everything dem dey form mancho, you go dey use your head.

You've spent on traditional wedding and for that not to be a total waste, kindly go and meet her, reason with her and go tactical, not directly with authority.

Happy married life in advance!

I need to meet you in person.

Man of wisdom

Sarah20A:
brother you need jesus more than Sylvester

Sister Sarah, please pray for me.

If truly she is earning that amount, she should have been the one to volunteer to contribute to the wedding and not wait for you to share the responsibilities. Atleast you are in it together and there's no law that states that the groom has to bear it all. If she wants a white wedding, she must be ready to contribute to it.

dominique:


I know the bride's family sponsors a large chunk of the wedding amongst the Yorubas but poverty has done a number on some people that they now shed the responsibility on the groom and his family. Now for ordinary intro, the lady will request for money from the man to host him and his family. I don't know of I should blame poverty or entitlement mentality for this

This must be new and a shame to the girl's family.

faithfull18:

And equality as regards everything domestic in their home, cooking, cleaning etc. since they're already sharing wedding bills equally.

@OP, If you can't afford a big wedding, let her know if she's the type who loves big weddings. Why put yourself through unnecessary strain

Hope you know there are nannies and maids in some homes and they carry out most domestic chores.
Hope you also know there are homes in which the husbands do most of the major cooking cos the wives aren't good in the kitchen.

Orisirisi


Since Nairaland is so free that people can come and start a thread with all manner of question.

I'm starting a thread tomorrow titled.

I BOUGHT A PAIR OF SHOES BUT ONE LEG IS TIGHTER THAN THE OTHER. - Should I wear it like dat or go and give Oshiohmoleh or Hell rufai.

Michellekabod2:
I said I will use the 4.5m for my OWN business o....

Babym, your "BUSINESS" is also my "BUSINESS" and my "BUSINESS" is also yours. Sweetim, infact, it is our "BUSINESS". Just let me put a ring on it and it becomes a pure "FAMILY BUSINESS". I'm tired of going to Pluto. Biko!!!

ahiboilandgas:
u don deal with woman that way ....u scope her .u dont tell to foot the bills u get the total bill then form at if u are trying hard to gather the whole sum then she will see reason to assist even more than your expectations

This is wrong. A real man doesn't 'scope', why should he? Is it not her wedding? Is he getting married to himself? Where is this entitlement thing coming from? What law, natural/scriptural/man-made stipulates that a man must solely finance a wedding be it Traditional or White? Chief, come out and come out plain. She must take responsibility.

Some women confuses privileges with rights, they are not the same. A wedding happens between two people and by implication, two families. The two families have a role to play in financing the wedding. Why should it be one-sided? Even if I have the money to finance a wedding I wouldn't do it solely, the bride's family must participate no matter how small, there must be the sense of responsibility.

When myself and my wife decided to settledown, I put the facts on the table; that my both parents are retirees, her father was late and her mum is also a retiree and so it's going to be 'our wedding'. So she got the message, whatever budget/model she wants us to adopt is good but she must have it at the back of her mind that we are both financing the wedding. This by implication expressly took away all unnecessary 'my wedding day wants/fantasies' and we went for only our needs. By the grace of God we had a relatively small but classy wedding of not more than 200-250 guests. Traditional, Registry and Reception on the same day... and it's been happily ever after for us.

This man, from his write up already spent a fortune on the Traditional wedding. Why then is the lady angry this time. When will she ever take responsibility for her marriage and yet-to-be-born family if she can't finance her own wedding. She's a working class with a relatively good pay, so what reasonable excuse will be her reason for getting angry?

Chief, please ignore, when she's done with her anger, she will come around. You gave too much and she chose not to appreciate your efforts on the Traditional wedding. Whenever she's ready you can start planning for the White wedding. You may choose to renegotiate the percentage on the condition that you are 'capable' not because she got angry at you bringing it up initially.

Finally, my two cents, give a lady an inch, she will go a mile. You have not seen the last of a woman trying to be evasive of her responsibilities to your Union and to your future family even when the means are there, just because you are 'the man' who must do everything while she sits back and enjoy the ride as the 'madam of the house' without contributing anything or too little to the family finance. Beware, now is the time to correct the anomaly.

Good luck in your marriage.

Ladycewhy:
Many women are not against equal financial contributions atleast on my part but also be ready to share equal chores and parenting ,we will share baby carrying days and cooking days . You can't go to work and I go to work and you will come home and raise you feet up to watch football while there is food to cook and kids to take care of .

Be ready cos there are days when you too will close from your work and go straight from there to the market to get food stuff for the house . This is how equal opportunity should be fair and truly equal .

This type of equality you are preaching is not practical and may even be considered impossible.
Simply because some roles are much more suited to each gender.

Will the woman be expected to carry heavy loads, wash car, switch on the generator, fix plumbing and electrical issues etc?

Of course you can argue a man doesn't have to do all those things cos he can pay people to do it, but the same argument applies to cleaning the house and other chores that women have generally been conditioned to do.

That's why I believe all these equality arguments are baseless and each gender should do stuffs in areas of their strengths. It shouldn't even be an issue.

Many times I wake up in the morning and I sweep/vacuum the floor while my wife is asleep cos I walk barefeet and can't stand any grit under my feet.

Cooking is not a big deal, anyone who gets home first or anytime at home can cook.

Rules on finances are based on discussion and on the current situation in the family.

At a point I was footing all the bills, At some point, wife was footing all the bills at another point, it was based on % of each persons monthly income.

I really don't understand why these things have to be an issue, I honestly don't.

And yes I don't see anything wrong with asking your wife to handle some of the wedding expenses if she's capable

OP I think you married her because of what she earns. It was wrong of you to demand she pays for her own wedding let alone to that tune. You are the one marrying her not the other way round.
You may've not been sincere with her and she is just getting to know
Sponsoring her wedding is something you both should have discussed during courtship. You planned all these to me.
You couldn't even wait for the white wedding before plucking her money for which you married her. You are the cheat here.

Davash222:
She’s earning 200K monthly
Where she dey work?



Assuming this story is legit, her 3 months salary should cover for her gown and the catering. But, that doesn’t mean you have to impose that on her unless she forced you to marry her.

No one is forcing you to wed. if you don’t have the funds for that, since you’re done with the traditional wedding and rites, go to any magistrate court close to you and certify your wedding.

I don’t even know who brought this issue of white wedding to Africans.

the court own who also brought it ?u also don't know

bily:


This type of equality you are preaching is not practical and may even be considered impossible.
Simply because some roles are much more suited to each gender.

Will the woman be expected to carry heavy loads, wash car, switch on the generator, fix plumbing and electrical issues etc?

Of course you can argue a man doesn't have to do all those things cos he can pay people to do it, but the same argument applies to cleaning the house and other chores that women have generally been conditioned to do.

That's why I believe all these equality arguments are baseless and each gender should do stuffs in areas of their strengths. It shouldn't even be an issue.

Many times I wake up in the morning and I sweep/vacuum the floor while my wife is asleep cos I walk barefeet and can't stand any grit under my feet.

Cooking is not a big deal, anyone who gets home first or anytime at home can cook.

Rules on finances are based on discussion and on the current situation in the family.

At a point I was footing all the bills, At some point, wife was footing all the bills at another point, it was based on % of each persons monthly income.

I really don't understand why these things have to be an issue, I honestly don't.

And yes I don't see anything wrong with asking your wife to handle some of the wedding expenses if she's capable

I think you should direct this answer to your fellow brothers here always spewing trash about Nigerian women. You claim these equal opportunity for parenting is not possible but white men are doing it with no hassle or do they have two heads from Nigerian men? I have sat back and seen how boys on this forum are quick to throw jabs at Nigerian women but the fact is these boys can't even do half of what the white men do .


You talked of plumbing , electrical and stuff ,lol oga your house na construction company? And what's there in turning on generator when I have changed fuel hose that my dad wanted to go and call a gen mechanic for ,lol.


I am glad you said "women have been conditioned to do certain chores" which means it was society that came up with it. An unwritten rule we were born into in this part of the world.


The truth is it is an issue because the modern man wants to eat his cake and have it. The duties of the modern woman has doubled,she now has to work and still take care of the house yet these men have made it seem like the modern woman is according to nairaland boys "not up to the standard of foreign women" oh well if you want the attitude of a foreign woman be ready to act the part of a foreign man .


No one is saying a woman should not contribute to her wedding but when you make it look like it has to be equal oh well be ready to give off that equality in other areas ,that's my point. There has to be a balance,if you want equal opportunity and financial contributions the be ready to spread it even.

donstan18:
Traditionally, a man is the chief sponsor of any wedding ceremony while the woman supports in a way she can. Reason, it's expected a man goes into marriage when financially stable and ready.

Allocating 50% to her passed a message that you'll be a type of husband who will be after the statistics of the wife's earning and spending. You sure wouldn't have done what you did if you hadn't any knowledge of her earning, you acted because you know her earning and that's a red flag for Nigerian ladies, because they don't like dragging and equal responsibilities in a home.

You don't go direct when you want a woman to contribute financially to something. You go Tactically[Not imposing, but asking how and where she can take care of, she'll choose, no matter the percentage of her choice, you lock up, keep the planning going, pretend like you are cool and then sketch out a personal plan of how to act worried and restless before her, she'll wanna know the problem, act like you wanna hide it from her, she'll be worried and pissed that you are hiding things from her, then you'll come up with a story and open up that you are facing financial crisis and don't know how to sort some things out concerning the wedding, she'll willingly help with pity without seeing you as a stingy or mean person]

No be everything dem dey form mancho, you go dey use your head.

You've spent on traditional wedding and for that not to be a total waste, kindly go and meet her, reason with her and go tactical, not directly with authority.

Happy married life in advance!

Really guy man

donstan18:
Traditionally, a man is the chief sponsor of any wedding ceremony while the woman supports in a way she can. Reason, it's expected a man goes into marriage when financially stable and ready.

Allocating 50% to her passed a message that you'll be a type of husband who will be after the statistics of the wife's earning and spending. You sure wouldn't have done what you did if you hadn't any knowledge of her earning, you acted because you know her earning and that's a red flag for Nigerian ladies, because they don't like dragging and equal responsibilities in a home.

You don't go direct when you want a woman to contribute financially to something. You go Tactically[Not imposing, but asking how and where she can take care of, she'll choose, no matter the percentage of her choice, you lock up, keep the planning going, pretend like you are cool and then sketch out a personal plan of how to act worried and restless before her, she'll wanna know the problem, act like you wanna hide it from her, she'll be worried and pissed that you are hiding things from her, then you'll come up with a story and open up that you are facing financial crisis and don't know how to sort some things out concerning the wedding, she'll willingly help with pity without seeing you as a stingy or mean person]

No be everything dem dey form mancho, you go dey use your head.

You've spent on traditional wedding and for that not to be a total waste, kindly go and meet her, reason with her and go tactical, not directly with authority.

Happy married life in advance!

Prof!

Ladycewhy:
I think you should direct this answer to your fellow brothers here always spewing trash about Nigerian women. You claim these equal opportunity for parenting is not possible but white men are doing it with no hassle or do they have two heads from Nigerian men?

Don't even bring the white man into this when it comes to finances... So much cultural differences it will be like comparing apples to oranges.

How many Nigerian men will invite you for a birthday party in a restaurant and at the end everyone will pay for what they have eaten? This is normal to them. They are the real definition of OYO.... On your own.
You think it will even be up for discussion who pays for wedding gown if it were a white couple? The wife already knows she will buy her wedding gown.

My question is why should the way a couple handle finances be pitted against house chores?
These are 2 separate things.
Money should be about survival and chores should be about individual strengths and timing.

Overseas, it's not even a topic up for discussion, it's whoever is at home that takes care of the house.

If a husband is doing morning shift like 9am-5pm and a wife is doing a 3pm to midnight shift, obviously the husband will be the major person taking care of the children and home front(btw this happens a lot overseas). This should have no bearing on how they chose to handle their finances.

If the family needs to split finances on percentages, it should have absolutely nothing to do with who does what?
If we wanna be progressive, then we should be, no point in picking and choosing.
We can't be clamoring for equality and still be holding on to the mentality of 'your money is our money and my money is my money'

sylvestersamuel:
Good morning my fellow Nairalanders, I will try to make my story brief and precise.... I have a fiancée whom I am already engaged to. As a matter of fact I have already done all our traditional marriage and rites the only thing left is our white wedding which will be coming up in the next 3 weeks.

Yesterday, my fiancée came to visit me in my house so as to discuss our wedding plans. But before she left, we had a slight misunderstanding and the reason for our misunderstanding was because I allocated 50% of our wedding expenses to her i.e (she would be the one to sew her wedding gown, pay for the catering service amongst others) while I take care of other expenses...

On hearing this, she didn't even utter a word but left with annoyance, since then I have been trying to call her but she hasn't been picking my calls neither have she replied any of my messages....

Please I need your advice, did I do or say anything wrong, because I know how much I spent during our traditional marriage rite and mind you, she earns close to 200k per month.... Insult in form of advice is allowed all I need is just your advice.

I'm sure she's from Abeokuta. Awon, stingy bitches

tmanuelle:


This is wrong. A real man doesn't 'scope', why should he? Is it not her wedding? Is he getting married to himself? Where is this entitlement thing coming from? What law, natural/scriptural/man-made stipulates that a man must solely finance a wedding be it Traditional or White? Chief, come out and come out plain. She must take responsibility.

Some women confuses privileges with rights, they are not the same. A wedding happens between two people and by implication, two families. The two families have a role to play in financing the wedding. Why should it be one-sided? Even if I have the money to finance a wedding I wouldn't do it solely, the bride's family must participate no matter how small, there must be the sense of responsibility.

When myself and my wife decided to settledown, I put the facts on the table; that my both parents are retirees, her father was late and her mum is also a retiree and so it's going to be 'our wedding'. So she got the message, whatever budget/model she wants us to adopt is good but she must have it at the back of her mind that we are both financing the wedding. This by implication expressly took away all unnecessary 'my wedding day wants/fantasies' and we went for only our needs. By the grace of God we had a relatively small but classy wedding of not more than 200-250 guests. Traditional, Registry and Reception on the same day... and it's been happily ever after for us.

This man, from his write up already spent a fortune on the Traditional wedding. Why then is the lady angry this time. When will she ever take responsibility for her marriage and yet-to-be-born family if she can't finance her own wedding. She's a working class with a relatively good pay, so what reasonable excuse will be her reason for getting angry?

Chief, please ignore, when she's done with her anger, she will come around. You gave too much and she chose not to appreciate your efforts on the Traditional wedding. Whenever she's ready you can start planning for the White wedding. You may choose to renegotiate the percentage on the condition that you are 'capable' not because she got angry at you bringing it up initially.

Finally, my two cents, give a lady an inch, she will go a mile. You have not seen the last of a woman trying to be evasive of her responsibilities to your Union and to your future family even when the means are there, just because you are 'the man' who must do everything while she sits back and enjoy the ride as the 'madam of the house' without contributing anything or too little to the family finance. Beware, now is the time to correct the anomaly.

Good luck in your marriage.

we be African people and not europeans we African men like taking charge ,we dont aak our wifes or partner to contribute money ,they contribute in another form in runing the home .....we anit Indians or europeans ....islamically the man takes financial responsibility 100 percent must be agreed before and after marriage...this must be agreed in front of the witness......If he is ready to be Man he should be (orginal african man ) or he should look for oyinbo and share responsibilty......other capable men might be toasting her

Davash222:
She’s earning 200K monthly
Where she dey work?



Assuming this story is legit, her 3 months salary should cover for her gown and the catering. But, that doesn’t mean you have to impose that on her unless she forced you to marry her.

No one is forcing you to wed. if you don’t have the funds for that, since you’re done with the traditional wedding and rites, go to any magistrate court close to you and certify your wedding.

I don’t even know who brought this issue of white wedding to Africans.

Legit talk. We analysed it on one of our episodes

https://link.medium.com/xlfpnnK0T3

Kindly sponsor your wedding yourself. U don't force a woman to contribute to her own wedding, if u aren't financially capable then make more money.

Will u be willing to let her make equal decisions at home after she is allowed to sponsor 50% of the wedding? Seeing that she contributed equally to her own wedding. I guess not cos u would want to show u are the man and enforce the rules and laws in your own home.

If u need financial support from your woman, there are ways to go about it. U don't use force on her.

Wil u also be willing to share the wife's duty at home equally (50/50) with her? I guess not either

Naija men want women to be submissive at home as a wife, you show u are the man and want to make all the decisions but when it comes to finance u remember that she is working and u both are equal partners at home. �������

bily:


Don't even bring the white man into this when it comes to finances... So much cultural differences it will be like comparing apples to oranges.

How many Nigerian men will invite you for a birthday party in a restaurant and at the end everyone will pay for what they have eaten? This is normal to them. They are the real definition of OYO.... On your own.
You think it will even be up for discussion who pays for wedding gown if it were a white couple? The wife already knows she will buy her wedding gown.

My question is why should the way a couple handle finances be pitted against house chores?
These are 2 separate things.
Money should be about survival and chores should be about individual strengths and timing.

Overseas, it's not even a topic up for discussion, it's whoever is at home that takes care of the house.

If a husband is doing morning shift like 9am-5pm and a wife is doing a 3pm to midnight shift, obviously the husband will be the major person taking care of the children and home front(btw this happens a lot overseas). This should have no bearing on how they chose to handle their finances.

If the family needs to split finances on percentages, it should have absolutely nothing to do with who does what?
If we wanna be progressive, then we should be, no point in picking and choosing.
We can't be clamoring for equality and still be holding on to the mentality of ' your money is our money and my money is my money '

this mentality will fade when divorce laws are stronger and women can rest easy in their matrimonial homes knowing they cannot be sent packing one day by their husbands for not cooking his favorite meal ,lol as I have seen women sent out to the streets for the most absurd reasons.



And like I said ,I personally have no issues with bills, I know a woman who is the bread winner of her house yet all oga does every day is sit at home like an lmbecile and expect her to come back and cook for him . Honestly it irks me but it's her choice.


If the family does split the financial contributions it has everything to do with who does what cos you can't compare the amount of time on the hands of a fulltime house wife to attend to her family to that of a busy working woman.I know you get my point but just want to drag it on for the sake of argument and take one for the team.


Bottom line is boys on this forum have been advocating for women to bring something to the table , my question is are they ready to follow the Dynamics of this type of relationship to the end? You can't have both worlds,if you want the White man's type of relationship be ready to act like the white man , have a nice day.

donstan18:
Traditionally, a man is the chief sponsor of any wedding ceremony while the woman supports in a way she can. Reason, it's expected a man goes into marriage when financially stable and ready.

Allocating 50% to her passed a message that you'll be a type of husband who will be after the statistics of the wife's earning and spending. You sure wouldn't have done what you did if you hadn't any knowledge of her earning, you acted because you know her earning and that's a red flag for Nigerian ladies, because they don't like dragging and equal responsibilities in a home.

You don't go direct when you want a woman to contribute financially to something. You go Tactically[Not imposing, but asking how and where she can take care of, she'll choose, no matter the percentage of her choice, you lock up, keep the planning going, pretend like you are cool and then sketch out a personal plan of how to act worried and restless before her, she'll wanna know the problem, act like you wanna hide it from her, she'll be worried and pissed that you are hiding things from her, then you'll come up with a story and open up that you are facing financial crisis and don't know how to sort some things out concerning the wedding, she'll willingly help with pity without seeing you as a stingy or mean person]

No be everything dem dey form mancho, you go dey use your head.

You've spent on traditional wedding and for that not to be a total waste, kindly go and meet her, reason with her and go tactical, not directly with authority.

Happy married life in advance!

Twale! Brain wee nor kee u

Bro b4 fixing your marriage stuff you aught to have been ready financially but you made mistake by telling her 50percent.thats insulting if she's is my sister I will react because you are giving her a equal task as you.Go to her apologize.....

Oh God! Lots of very heartbreaking comments on here. Finance is a very delicate matter in marriage. I would have thought the lady would offer to contribute. But please bro, if she is reluctant to do this and you are capable, DO IT. Don't impose because you feel she should contribute.

While this is between you and her, fact that you invited us to the matter is because you have a tightening in your heart right about now. Our people say you can't put your legs in cold water and be scared of catching cold. Don't discuss this any further with any of your people. You don't want them hating your wife before she moves in.

Go, have a talk with her.

Two things:
- make sure you are the one that pays for her wedding gown.

- accept what she can offer. It is her wedding and she definitely wants to see it succeed.

In marriage, there is the proverbial 'borrow me' cache. Our fathers used it and are still using it. Of course they pay back...in kind/cash (breaking it further down...gifts, surprise trips, pleasant surprises. Or they dont pay back. It works like magic.

I don't mind an invitation. Happy married life.

Davash222:
She’s earning 200K monthly
Where she dey work?



Assuming this story is legit, her 3 months salary should cover for her gown and the catering. But, that doesn’t mean you have to impose that on her unless she forced you to marry her.

No one is forcing you to wed. if you don’t have the funds for that, since you’re done with the traditional wedding and rites, go to any magistrate court close to you and certify your wedding.

I don’t even know who brought this issue of white wedding to Africans.

Will the girl agree? The problem is most women want a beautiful white wedding ceremony but hate to spend their money....lol.

ahiboilandgas:
u don deal with woman that way ....u scope her .u dont tell to foot the bills u get the total bill then form at if u are trying hard to gather the whole sum then she will see reason to assist even more than your expectations

lol..confuse set of human beings. One moment you want honest and straight forward man another moment you prefer pretence and manipulation for her to spend

Brazenbabe:


My point is that you people are quick to share bills with your wives/fiances but never share the domestic responsibilities
You people are quick to say what you did for her but never say what they do for you
See how all of you are on the other thread saying your families come before your wife, bla bla bla
Will you also tell your families your wives pay at least half of the bills?
I thought Nigerian women contributed nothing to the household and lives of their husbands? Why are we now being asked to pay for weddings
Abi would the man agree to answer our surname?

That was exactly how it was before...lol now we are changing the narrative

loswhite:
lol..confuse set of human beings. One moment you want honest and straight forward man another moment you prefer pretence and manipulation for her to spend

mr straight forward when u where toasting your woman hope u where using bible quotes and on a date your shared in bills in spirits of 50 /50 ...

creolehunt:


Excuse me. Please is there anything even remotely wrong with her contributing to her own wedding? Should this even be a problem at all? It will be interesting to know why the woman in question is angry.

Somehow I detest selfish, entitled and unreasonable people. Shee earns 200k which is a whole lot of money given the economic realities of the time yet she won't want to be a financial partaker. When it suits them, they become equality advocates, other times they conveniently turn a blind eye.

I read where some of them were rambling incoherently on how they don't want their in-laws in their house. This is same women that bring all their family and ancestral problems to the man the moment he proposes.

Quite disturbing.

The manner with which the guy approached his fiancée matters. It should have been an appeal to assist in any way she can and not an outright imposition. The guy just sent a bad signal to her

if ur story is true. Inasmuch as I don't know how you passed you message to her. But no matter what, she is stingy and self centered. She wants to marry u, and yet doesn't want to atleast support you. Most definitely, she doesn't love you

If I were to be in ur shoes (God forbid though), I wil dump her silly ass.

If u marry such a lady, when u are not around, the children wil go hungry, despite she has more than enough money in her account. she will tell the children to wait till you return before they eat

U av already done traditional self, chai, I pity you