₦airaland Forum

Dyt:
It isn't about me
I just took pity on the womEn in your life

I feel sorry for you.Are you alright?How can you feel pity for people you barely know?? Best to just hold your pathetic feelings.They're not unhappy like u think neither are they complaining.
Like they say "misery Loves Company"Can u Please not bring me and my women into your misery again??Since you want to disrespect my women, I'll just have to Ignore U.

culturedboss:
Like they say "misery Loves Company"Can u Please not bring me and my women into your misery again??Since you want to disrespect my women,

Did you read these lines again?
Misery?

You are not doing well my brother
At all


Once again I pity the womEn in your life
I said what I said

One of the wrong place is seek advice is on this platform.. Do not listen to all the girls telling you to leave your husband/home.. By all indication, they are single girls and hence their advice could cause you more harm than good. [b] Don't listen to those telling you to leave your home/b]

This plaforn is one of the wrong places to seek for marital advice..." I hear the girls telling you to leave/forsake your family/home....Please do not listen to the bad advicers on this platform.. Most of these girls are not married and have no idea of what marriage is all about..

No doubt, Marriage needs Work and you cannot underestimate the amount of effort/work you need to do in order to build a successful home..Keep faith and hope alive, trust in God to direct your path. "DO NOT LISTEN TO THOSE WHO HAD ADVISE YOU TO LEAVE YOUR HOME HERE" THEY ARE BAD ADVISER, WHO WANT TO LEAD YOU TO A DOOM PATH... Be wise Ma... Be wise!!!

Sotland:
This plaforn is one of the wrong places to seek for marital advice..." I hear the girls telling you to leave/forsake your family/home....Please do not listen to the bad advicers on this platform.. Most of these girls are not married and have no idea of what marriage is all about..

No doubt, Marriage needs Work and you cannot underestimate the amount of effort/work you need to do in order to build a successful home..Keep faith and hope alive, trust in God to direct your path. "DO NOT LISTEN TO THOSE WHO HAD ADVISE YOU TO LEAVE YOUR HOME HERE" THEY ARE BAD ADVISER, WHO WANT TO LEAD YOU TO A DOOM PATH... Be wise Ma... Be wise!!!

Well she said she isn't leaving and not ready to leave but she feels like murdering him sometimes

InDistress:
My dad is a very conservative man and will be broken if I leave. My younger sister left her husband for same infidelity and my parents haven't heard the last of it from neighbours and gossips. I don't wantbtonput them through emotional stress. My husband's elder brother separated from his wife over 30yrs ago over infidelity and all tgeir children amounted to nothing, I feel scared for my kids.

I honestly understand you my dear sister. Hmmmm can't ur parents especially ur dad talk to him man to man. Cuz kids are involved here, divorce will really have bad consequences on the kids.
In my own little advice please use condoms when havin sex to avoid stories that touch. But wait ooo, you saw all these philandering attitudes in ur hubby while you were dating and you still decided to marry him... It takes the most special grace of God for a cheating man to change ooo.

Las Las call family meeting and table ur issue. You will get over it. Just be strong

Dyt:
Well she said she isn't leaving and not ready to leave but she feels like murdering him sometimes

Thinking that alone has made her a murder, and if she ever tries it, she will live to regret it.. The stigma will be upon her and her children.. Even her family may reject her....

Sotland:
Thinking that alone has made her a murder, and if she ever tries it, she will live to regret it.. The stigma will be upon her and her children.. Even her family may reject her....

So in this case, what do you advice her to do?

Dyt:
So in this case, what do you advice her to do?

You should read the second paragraph of my initial comment....

Another Nollywood blockbuster, staring Omotola Jalade, Genevieve Nnaji, Ramsey Noah, GRB your copy NOW!!!

Sotland:
You should read the second paragraph of my initial comment....

Wasn't it same with the first?



Ok
Nvm hunku

I'm tired of this man, whenever I see him I start feeling murderous. But I do not want another person raising my kids. I feel terribly sad.

This statement of yours sums up your decision to make.
You either stay or leave.If you decide to stay,you have to keep up with all the bu@#sh*t.
If you don't want another man raising your kids,raise them yourself......you don't have to marry another man.

You obviously didn't do your due diligence before marrying this man.A man like this is so easy to spot while dating.

djon78:
You never see anything. I have a childhood acquaintance who will fly to UK for a weekend to sleep with his oloshos especially one Jamaican young single mother living in those London council flat.
This is a guy in a day can sleep with three different women.

I know guys that import all those East African girls into nija or import them to Dubai. That's normal runs for them.

Dyt:
Wasn't it same with the first?



Ok
Nvm hunku

lol.. One should just be very careful of the advice from this platform... Many negative minds here

Sotland:
lol.. One should just be very careful of the advice from this platform... Many negative minds here

The people are same every where lol
The online keypad warriors
The friends
The family

Dyt:
The people are same every where lol
The online keypad warriors
The friends
The family

I cannot agree less...lol . Too much negative energy

happney65:
I advise that you divorce him. Even if you must cheat,cheat responsibly..Sleeping with different women without condoms isnt too good..My take

Which one is cheat responsibly?
What is responsible about cheating?
Mind the kind of advice you dish out, some people here are gullible.

No marry wahala,marry bigger wahala,why can't people be faithful to their partners,why must people cheat, its really a pity what this world is turning into,I advise u leave him,if u can't,then stop sleeping with him b4 u contact a terrible disease,think about your kids.

InDistress:
My dad is a very conservative man and will be broken if I leave. My younger sister left her husband for same infidelity and my parents haven't heard the last of it from neighbours and gossips. I don't wantbtonput them through emotional stress. My husband's elder brother separated from his wife over 30yrs ago over infidelity and all tgeir children amounted to nothing, I feel scared for my kids.

My dear sister i have read yout story and im sorry you have to go through all of this I feel for you. But i have good news for you.....you are not the first infact many wives of rich men and middle class men are going thru this secretly .. the good news is that some of overcome amd so i trust you will.

I am also happy that you are well to do and can fend for yourself. I am happier that you have 4 lovely kids that love you more than you love them. I am also glad that you have parents who you care for?
So my dear first off , you have many things i have listes above that everyone does not have, if you murder him and go to jail, you have destroyed all of it

I will beg you to do something, maybe difficult but will help u in the long run

1) Ignore that man as if he doesnt exist, what do i mean? If you get a separate room fine. Dont look at his phones anymore so u dont die young and same women will come and destroy all u struggled to build
Some men are at thia point in thier life and the more u complain the more you chase him out. The more he sees you ate jealous the more he continues to spite you
Please rule number one, let him be!!!
You already have 4 kids wetin again u never see or chop, e go tire am , but only when u stop chasing him.

2) love your self , fron what i read you dont even realize you have every reason to love yourself, you have what some women are praying for. Forget him, go back to taking care of ur beautiful self, go shopping with friends or sisters, join clubs and associations, engage yourself and be too busy to be bothered by him.
3) have u forgotten those kids need you now more than you need that man? Sweetie take good care of ur kids, be part pf their life, take them swimming, playin playing piano, dance classes , after chirch activities. Form a bond with them that will fill the vacuim yout husband created trust me when he realizes u re not chasing him anymore the tides change.

You are too young, too beautiful, too loved to be begging a man for love, if u dont stop now u may end up killing yourself or him and that would be disastrous.
Theres more to life and marriage than him, if he has decided tp ignore u pls ignore him.
But in all of this, be wise , serve him his meal as usual, respect him , take what he gives you and dont complain.
Greet him welcome and goodbye , start keeping you money and dont let him know how much u have? U will even be too engaged to think of sex.
If you try his in the next 6 months he will begin to look inwards.

If you can, pls dont go to him for sex , if he comes tell him u cant until he goes for test.if he reports then u have ur chance of telling it all.

My sister, its not easy but it will be worth it. U can always reach me, i have been there and i know u will be fine

Misscongenialit:
My dear sister i have read yout story and im sorry you have to go through all of this I feel for you. But i have good news for you.....you are not the first infact many wives of rich men and middle class men are going thru this secretly .. the good news is that some of overcome amd so i trust you will.

I am also happy that you are well to do and can fend for yourself. I am happier that you have 4 lovely kids that love you more than you love them. I am also glad that you have parents who you care for?
So my dear first off , you have many things i have listes above that everyone does not have, if you murder him and go to jail, you have destroyed all of it

I will beg you to do something, maybe difficult but will help u in the long run

1) Ignore that man as if he doesnt exist, what do i mean? If you get a separate room fine. Dont look at his phones anymore so u dont die young and same women will come and destroy all u struggled to build
Some men are at thia point in thier life and the more u complain the more you chase him out. The more he sees you ate jealous the more he continues to spite you
Please rule number one, let him be!!!
You already have 4 kids wetin again u never see or chop, e go tire am , but only when u stop chasing him.

2) love your self , fron what i read you dont even realize you have every reason to love yourself, you have what some women are praying for. Forget him, go back to taking care of ur beautiful self, go shopping with friends or sisters, join clubs and associations, engage yourself and be too busy to be bothered by him.
3) have u forgotten those kids need you now more than you need that man? Sweetie take good care of ur kids, be part pf their life, take them swimming, playin playing piano, dance classes , after chirch activities. Form a bond with them that will fill the vacuim yout husband created trust me when he realizes u re not chasing him anymore the tides change.

You are too young, too beautiful, too loved to be begging a man for love, if u dont stop now u may end up killing yourself or him and that would be disastrous.
Theres more to life and marriage than him, if he has decided tp ignore u pls ignore him.
But in all of this, be wise , serve him his meal as usual, respect him , take what he gives you and dont complain.
Greet him welcome and goodbye , start keeping you money and dont let him know how much u have? U will even be too engaged to think of sex.
If you try his in the next 6 months he will begin to look inwards.

If you can, pls dont go to him for sex , if he comes tell him u cant until he goes for test.if he reports then u have ur chance of telling it all.

My sister, its not easy but it will be worth it. U can always reach me, i have been there and i know u will be fine

Follow this advice dear op

InDistress:
Please I want reasonable opinion from responsible people.

I got married 12years ago and have 3 kids. His elder brother is a family friend and my dad knows their family quite well, especially his older siblings.
He does not live in the country but visits 4 times a year, during those visits, he spends about a month or two. Before someone says I Married him for money, I didn't. As at the time we got married he had NOTHING, in fact he was sharing a 2bedroom flat with his elder sister in a remote part of Lagos and drives a rickety Audi, but he was this type of person that wants to be seen as a multi millionaire, he is so desperate to put out a certain public image. Yes he is doing quite well now, but he isnt rich.
During the haydays of the marriage, as at then, camera phones were not rampant, so I picked up his Sony camera when he came back from abroad just to view pictures, then I saw him in a 3some, in fact it was an òrgy because I could hear other people's voices in the video. I confronted him about it and he begged. Later i also found out that he was sleeping with his secretary in Nigeria. It was on Valentine's day that year, I begged this man to stay home so we can celebrate valentine at home, but he refused asking me if valentine is the food we will eat, but I had a hunch and decided to go to his office only to see him sharing a bottle of red wine with his secretary and some other people. He later didn't come home that day as he said he went to the island to see a business partner and was stuck in traffic so he decided to sleep at his business partners. But i later saw his chat and it happemed that he lodged in a hotel with the secretary to placate her for me coming to the office.
Recently I called him when he travelled to the village, but he didn't know we didn't hang up the call and I heard him propositioning a hooker. I confronted him and he got defensive. So I decided to hack his whatsapp. It was then I found out tgat this man is the most irresponsible man alive. I saw a chat with a Tanzanian girl he met on flight and he booked a two-way ticket for this girl to come and meet him in Dubai. What broke my heart the most was that he told me he had an urgent deal and had to travel to his country of residence. Last Thursday, he told me he was going to for a friends childnaming ceremony, I asked to go with him and he declined only for me to see his chat where he was booking a hooker to go with him. I also saw his chat where he was telling one to come and meet him at an upscale hotel in my area where the least room is 35k. The girl asked if they accept short rest there, he said that he will pay full and the girl can stay back to rest afterwards. But whenever you ask this man for money fornhomekeeping ,he will say there's no money tgat business is bad.
Recently we started a building project in the village and I committed almost 4m of my own money (My mom warned me not to try it). We already have a 3b3droom apartment in same compound but we are building a bigger one now. Instead of him to be sleeping there, he opted to stay in a hotel for over two weeks. We agreed he should be as discrete as possible when he goes for the project, but this man packed 2 other tagalongs and paid for their rooms too where they were taking pròstitutes.
Everytime, he will say there is no money. When travelling, he will drop 15k for me and 4kids while he pays his hookers as much as 50k, in fact there is one he is paying her houserent. I contacted one and she said she asked him for assistance for her sick child, and he said he will only help if they have sex and he paid her 30k , all these while the children's fees have not been paid.
He keeps very irresponsible and backward thinking friends who empower his behaviour. I saw a chat where he and his friend were passing around a particular hooker. The funny thing is that before he has 5 lines of chatbwith these girls, they start bringing all their family problems and he will ask for account number.
Currently, I have herpes and the gynecologist said it's untreatable, I confronted my husband and he denied any wrong doing. Ever since I Married this man, heaven knows that no man has ever come close to my body. I always saw packs of antibiotics in his car but I never knew he was always popping them after having unprotected sex withbtge hookers. Every part of the country he visits, he has a load of callgirls at his beckand call.
I feels so used and heartbroken because I have dedicated my entire being to make this marriage work. Sometimes I go on days of fasting for this man whenever he has a downturn in his business, but I never knew he was the one invalidating the prayers with his waywardness. He goes about telling his whòres that he isnt married. One of them I contacted told me that he is a serial womanizer and never uses protection.
Before anyone ask me what I bring tontge table, I own a flourishing business. I can afford to travel to Dubai to bring my wares. Yes he started the business for me, but that's just it and that was 10yrs ago. I'm tired of this man, whenever I see him I start feeling murderous. But I do not want another person raising my kids. I feel terribly sad.

Your case is like mine.

But I'm still alive.
Is only some one who has been in that shoes that will understand.

My sister mine is up to 14 years

Such men doesn't change

for such men you don't trust him.

He can will the house that both of you suferd to build to a prostitute.

Sincerely the best is to look out for a man who is responsible you can always talk to.
instead of you to kill him.

Pls don't think of murder pls


Grab as much as you can to establish yourself

Ethereal0110:
No offense, Devil has sent his nephew to you and u have married him... He enjoys spending time and money outside.. and does not enjoy anything with u. That man is not a husband. He was sent to frustrate u, make ur life a hell till u wake up one day and decide to kill urself.

This is not marriage.
No need to make noise once u are fed up just hand him divorce papers and leave with ur kids. Let him go and enjoy his sickening life.
No need to explain anything to him.

THIS MAN WILL SHORTEN YOUR LIFE SPAN IF U DONT DO SOMETHING.


THANKS.

Good

Please separate from this man. You are not gaining anything there except that he is a threat to your life, health and emotional stability. He has seen that you are a fool and likely not to go anywhere because of your low self esteem and your families stupidity.

Leave that environment for your own good and that of your kids. You are destroying their future by allowing them to be in that environment. You think they don’t see everything going on? When your husband finally catches HIV and he will, ask yourself if you are willing to live with the disease? With viruses like Corona virus which can kill people living with such illnesses in our day and time today.

If your children go and mistakenly use a sharp object he has used, what will you say to yourself after? He is too reckless and careless to have around innocent children. You won’t be able to forgive yourself if they catch something from him.

Also such men who can’t control themselves are likely to molest their own daughters. I hope you are looking after your daughters while you foolishly stay there in your own stupidity. They don’t deserve to suffer for you. Make sure he’s not alone with them. I don’t trust this man with any hole walking, even an animal. He has shown he has no control and no love for himself.

He hates himself and is hell bent on destroying himself and taking you down with him. Someone who loves himself would not be as careless and reckless as what you call a husband there. You better gather sense while you still can and explain to your kids in the way they can understand.

Adults should not be destroying the safety and sanity of kids only for their spouses to turn around and cover for them. Your kids should be made fully aware of his behavior and the consequences of such action which he led you to leave the house you share with him. So that in future they know better what kind of spouses to go for and your husband cannot come and bobo them anyhow with lies.

InDistress:
My dad is a very conservative man and will be broken if I leave. My younger sister left her husband for same infidelity and my parents haven't heard the last of it from neighbours and gossips. I don't wantbtonput them through emotional stress. My husband's elder brother separated from his wife over 30yrs ago over infidelity and all tgeir children amounted to nothing, I feel scared for my kids.

so you want to add HIV to the list of disease because of your kids? i guess you feel you can not raise those kids by yourself