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How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? - Romance - Nairaland

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The Consequences Of Being "Too" Nice / She Broke Up With Her Boyfriend For Being Too Nice (Photo) / My Boyfriend Is A Mumu, He's Too Nice How Do I Change Him. (2) (3) (4)

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How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Spman: 8:30am On Mar 18, 2020
Pls someone should give me a tips on how to stop being too Nice in a relationship..
Whenever i tried to make it equal like not giving full attention but i will end acting stupid again and i know fully well giving a lady too much attention will make them take you for granted

1 Like

Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by cRobo: 8:35am On Mar 18, 2020
Know when to say No when its time to say No

Never displease yourself and please anybody

It's not worth it

I won't say a word
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by XhosaNostra(f): 8:44am On Mar 18, 2020
Don't stop being a nice person altogether, but have boundaries. Iron fist in a velvet glove sort of thing. They must hear you roar every now & then, when they cross the line.

Too many guys opt for the douchebag schtick, thinking it'll yield better results, but that's only short term. Girls get tired of assholes, just as much as they get tired of Mr Nice Guy because it becomes predictable after a while. In other words, be human. Be kind but flip if you must.

1 Like

Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Great100000: 8:46am On Mar 18, 2020
Spman:
Pls someone should give me a tips on how to stop being too Nice in a relationship..
Whenever i tried to make it equal like not giving full attention but i will end acting stupid again and i know fully well giving a lady too much attention will make them take you for granted
Walahi, this thing is happening to me at the moment, yeah she is very very pretty and she has lots of male friends, so she is using that to take me for granted, when i tried to do i dont care attitude i ended up doing giving her much attention and she is using that to take me for granted like if i no see her i no fit do anything.
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Topestbilly(m): 8:57am On Mar 18, 2020
Dont stop bro, identify those that take your being nice for foolishness and cut them off. Keep being nice, it pays, i swear.

2 Likes

Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Nobody: 9:00am On Mar 18, 2020
I'll give you real life practice tips:
1. If you are a business man, say no to a beautiful customer that wants credit

2. One pretty chick you're cool with is going to call for data subscriptions. Tell her these exact words with a smile: " Hantie go and hustle please". Then smile. And end the talk there.

3. Your colleague at the office is going to see cash in your wallet and ask for some. Tell that colleague that today you don't feel like giving anyone money. End the talk there.

Do these 3 times weekly and people will get used to the new you and give you space. Be kind, and selectively ruthless.

"We stand at the house of a coward [wicked ruthless Sherlock] to point at the ruins where a strong man [people pleasing guy] once lived."
- Chinua Achebe

1 Like

Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by donbachi(m): 9:03am On Mar 18, 2020
Continue till you meet your kind
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by allandutch: 9:18am On Mar 18, 2020
Great100000:
Walahi, this thing is happening to me at the moment, yeah she is very very pretty and she has lots of male friends, so she is using that to take me for granted, when i tried to do i dont care attitude i ended up doing giving her much attention and she is using that to take me for granted like if i no see her i no fit do anything.
Spin More Plates.
You're either her lover or her provider ( of money and attention ) and based on what you said you fall in the provider category.
And only give attention to girls that reciprocate your affections towards them. Those that don't, cut them off. And never accept their offer of friendship. I'm not saying that you shouldn't relate with girls but those that you're sexually attracted to, if it doesn't work out and they ask you to be just friends, refuse. Move on to the next one.

2 Likes

Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Spman: 10:03am On Mar 18, 2020
Great100000:
Walahi, this thing is happening to me at the moment, yeah she is very very pretty and she has lots of male friends, so she is using that to take me for granted, when i tried to do i dont care attitude i ended up doing giving her much attention and she is using that to take me for granted like if i no see her i no fit do anything.

Hmm so bad... I don't know why i keep failing my principles that i won't do any shiit of too much affection
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by JAOS(m): 10:22am On Mar 18, 2020
talk less and do less

1 Like

Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by sanesta: 10:25am On Mar 18, 2020
Chai
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Jaqenhghar: 11:16am On Mar 18, 2020
XhosaNostra:
Don't stop being a nice person altogether, but have boundaries. Iron fist in a velvet glove sort of thing. They must hear you roar every now & then, when they cross the line.

Too many guys opt for the douchebag schtick, thinking it'll yield better results, but that's only short term. Girls get tired of assholes, just as much as they get tired of Mr Nice Guy because it becomes predictable after a while. In other words, be human. Be kind but flip if you must.
In Niggeria being nice = being stupid. They don't know the difference. Thats why you see bullies like SARS and those soldiers, no one sweats them. They are revered.

1 Like

Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Great100000: 3:19pm On Mar 18, 2020
allandutch:

Spin More Plates.
You're either her lover or her provider ( of money and attention ) and based on what you said you fall in the provider category.
And only give attention to girls that reciprocate your affections towards them. Those that don't, cut them off. And never accept their offer of friendship. I'm not saying that you shouldn't relate with girls but those that you're sexually attracted to, if it doesn't work out and they ask you to be just friends, refuse. Move on to the next one.
Actually, it started well and let me just say i was her lover then because i dont usually give her money for the reasons best known to me, if she come to my place i only give her transport money and when i feel like i take her out and i think its normal but the problem is that she is very very pretty and has lots of male friends and i gave her lots of attention and she is now that as an advantage but have reduce it now and she is even complaining, there was a time around last week when i uploaded the picture of my close friend (Female) and she later complained that am dating her blah blah blah, anyway i have cut my ties with her sha, cant have heartbreak because of girl.
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Great100000: 3:24pm On Mar 18, 2020
allandutch:

Spin More Plates.
You're either her lover or her provider ( of money and attention ) and based on what you said you fall in the provider category.
And only give attention to girls that reciprocate your affections towards them. Those that don't, cut them off. And never accept their offer of friendship. I'm not saying that you shouldn't relate with girls but those that you're sexually attracted to, if it doesn't work out and they ask you to be just friends, refuse. Move on to the next one.
Before she use to care, she will come to my house and cook for me, romance and stuffs, even on my birthday she gave me things and when i jokingly told her before my birthday that i want to buy show, she told me that she doesnt have much but she will give me some of the money on my birthday and she did and like i said she also gave me other things on my birthday, but like i said she is using that pretty of her to take me for granted and because she has lots of male friends.
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by allandutch: 3:44pm On Mar 18, 2020
Great100000:
Before she use to care, she will come to my house and cook for me, romance and stuffs, even on my birthday she gave me things and when i jokingly told her before my birthday that i want to buy show, she told me that she doesnt have much but she will give me some of the money on my birthday and she did and like i said she also gave me other things on my birthday, but like i said she is using that pretty of her to take me for granted and because she has lots of male friends.
Now I'm confused. What exactly is the problem you're having with this girl?


From this it seems as if you are just being insecure.
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Great100000: 3:47pm On Mar 18, 2020
allandutch:

Now I'm confused. What exactly is the problem you're having with this girl?


From this it seems as if you are just being insecure.
Yes i feel insecure, there is a guy that she is very very close with and when i asked her who be that guy is and she said he is her friend, she later accused me that am not trusting her and if i can trust her we should call it quite.
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by allandutch: 3:53pm On Mar 18, 2020
Great100000:
Yes i feel insecure, there is a guy that she is very very close with and when i asked her who be that guy is and she said he is her friend, she later accused me that am not trusting her and if i can trust her we should call it quite.
You should've just ignore her and go after other girls you're interested in.
Why cling to one girl as if your entire life depends on her being yours ( she never was ) ?
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Great100000: 4:09pm On Mar 18, 2020
allandutch:

You should've just ignore her and go after other girls you're interested in.
Why cling to one girl as if your entire life depends on her being yours ( she never was ) ?
That was my mistake and i have ignore her now, i was very interested in her before and like you said she knows that i cling to her so so much and thats why she is behaving, anyway lessons learnt.
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Nobody: 4:10pm On Mar 18, 2020
if u too nice u will only be taken advantage of.
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Nobody: 4:18pm On Mar 18, 2020
XhosaNostra:
Don't stop being a nice person altogether, but have boundaries. Iron fist in a velvet glove sort of thing. They must hear you roar every now & then, when they cross the line.

Too many guys opt for the douchebag schtick, thinking it'll yield better results, but that's only short term. Girls get tired of assholes, just as much as they get tired of Mr Nice Guy because it becomes predictable after a while. In other words, be human. Be kind but flip if you must.
Are you married?
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Nobody: 4:22pm On Mar 18, 2020
Spman:
Pls someone should give me a tips on how to stop being too Nice in a relationship..
Whenever i tried to make it equal like not giving full attention but i will end acting stupid again and i know fully well giving a lady too much attention will make them take you for granted

Don't stop.
Don't fall in love with someone
Fall in Love with the value you see in someone.
E.g my mom is the most beautiful woman on earth why because I see so in her.
Not that she is to you but to me. Set your values or a woman will never value you.

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Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Crunchyg3: 4:22pm On Mar 18, 2020
Just go and read Ubunja's post here on nairaland that's all you need to be OK
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by tunize(m): 4:59pm On Mar 18, 2020
Everybody is nice ooh the only thing is to know wen to sey NO the way u dey YES.
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by XhosaNostra(f): 5:06pm On Mar 18, 2020
Mandelus:

Are you married?

You wanna do the needful?

1 Like

Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Nobody: 5:12pm On Mar 18, 2020
XhosaNostra:


You wanna do the needful?
ASAP 09061792462
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Barney001: 5:22pm On Mar 18, 2020
Mandelus:

ASAP 09061792462

Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Nobody: 5:27pm On Mar 18, 2020
[quote author=Barney001 post=87556425][/quote]
Value what you have

Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by XhosaNostra(f): 5:32pm On Mar 18, 2020
Mandelus:

ASAP 09061792462

Just like that, I have found the one tongue

2 Likes

Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Nobody: 9:01pm On Mar 18, 2020
XhosaNostra:


Just like that, I have found the one tongue
SMS
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by koffos(m): 6:49am On Mar 19, 2020
Jaqenhghar:

In Niggeria being nice = being stupid. They don't know the difference. Thats why you see bullies like SARS and those soldiers, no one sweats them. They are revered.
.. are you Nigerian
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by Jaqenhghar: 9:02am On Mar 19, 2020
koffos:
.. are you Nigerian
What do you think?
Re: How Can I Stop Being Too Nice? by koffos(m): 9:18am On Mar 19, 2020
Jaqenhghar:
What do you think?
.. I can't tell

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