bigpicture001:
...its disadvantages are more severe....

You get disrespected....

They become uncontrollable

They become stingy

The love less

You will likely consider divorce

you may die quickly carrying all burdens

bigpicture001:


Do u know how many marriages break up cuz of washing machines....?

You guys get married and all loved up....you don't want to stress her washing your clothe so you buy the machine....

After 2years machine spoils nd your not financially ready for immediate replace...sh washes your clothe...the next sh washes them also but ask about your plans for the machine

The next time,sh washes them,but grudgingly..nd ur pissed off..you get angry cuz you just realized your wife is already putting of resistance to wash your clothes except their is machine as against your numerous friends wives...

You now want to assert authority and insist you won't buy it...nd one day sh wouldn't wash it nd tell u sh is tired nd quarell with you directly ant it....your confused nd breathless...

Sh continues her resistance nd you wash it your self thinking it will touch her....sh continues to ignore you nd your now 40 washing your clothe all by yourself cuz of I want to make life easier lovey lovey....

My own is stay strong in what you want in a lady...a resourcfull lady hardly respects a man!!!!

40k will get you a washing machine

Those of us who prefer them young and untouched,

Is it possible for a 19-year-old girl to already be making money in Nigeria.




I no go fit marry a girl above 21 years

MrBrownJay1:
IMHO i dont think her income has anything to do with finding a right mate, and instead this should be primarily about the MINDSET of that person. a job is just a tool to "help" you guys have a better life, it aint a necessary foundation to assure anyone of a great union. yes , a lot of women out there are LIABILITIES, but having a job does not solve this issue. there are a lot of LIABILITIES out there that have jobs.

the important question Is: whats important for your family?! a wife with a job (that she could lose a week after wedding) OR a wife with good character (that she can never lose)?! there is a huge difference between a mentally/emotionally broke woman AND a woman who is currently unemployed.

money is as important as character

If you are a working medical doctor, pharmacist in search of Me(husband, good job, travels at will, intelligent) I am here. Link up

.

Bunch of lazy men wailing as usual
They want an under 18 virgin, graduate, earning 6figures who can give them children before she clocks 29..

Whereas the men do not need to have anything, just their preeks and a 10k salary

eediotas

I can NEVER marry a broke ass woman.

I made mistake..... In my next life I won't marry

Must we marry Make una leave all this relationship wahala

2buffagain:
Gentlemen. The reality of living in the 20th century has changed, and so must every notion formed from previous days that no longer hold weight today.

Women are not the only ones who should be asking what you do.
You should also be asking her what she does....and guaging her wifeability from her response.
Nobody likes to suffer...yourself included. So why sign up for a lifetime of every financial request of your immediate family (and possibly both your extended families ) coming to just you alone?

Gone are the days where families survived on one income alone. Those days, houses in Nigeria used to cost #5M or less. These same houses now cost well over #30M.

I can bet your income did not also inflate 6x over the same time.

The reality is that you need a wife who also brings something home, and honestly it should hopefully be around the same (or more God willing) of what you pull in.

This way one person's income can cover the family stuff and the other person's income goes towardssavings/investments/emergencies/joblessness buffering/ etc. Your family will go farther and you can even both retire earlier if this is done right.

Also Naija guys please, have some respect for yourself.
If you meet a girl and she has the mental configuration of always wanting money from you, just know that she is not the one.

As a sister here once said, "A girl who truly likes you, won't ask you for money...unless it's bad and you are her last resort."
Na woman talk am. Believe that sister. Peep that one game from her, and most of you will be alright.

If a girl really likes you, she'll be too busy trying to think of ways to be an asset to your life or impress you...not a taker.

Get you a girl who makes her money with a good source of income and who understands that her income is to be included in plans.

You have been told.
You should be done with your broke girl phase right about now ^{(much like how women should be done with their bad boy stage).}
It does nothing for your life.

NOTE: I am not saying go and marry an idiot because she makes money.... Obviously.
You are still looking for a good wife, who just ALSO happens to be equipped with income and/or good income prospects and drive.

Friend, I get your point but its not even about the money itself. There is a saying that good name is worth more than gold and a good character is is far more precious than diamond. A rude girl is a rude girl and it has to do with improper upbringing and bad parenting. Whether she is working or not, that's the way it is and with the poor parenting rampant all over the world, a virtuous woman becaones more scarce and difficult to find. So if you see a humble loyal and committed lady, pls treat her with care and respect even if she is not working.

Women for your own sanity and comfort, have a source of income. It's soo cool when he says no to a need of yours and you can simply whip out your atm and go Gerrit.

CanadaOrBust:


So what u want is a girl with solid character who can weather any storm with u and without u, even if they don’t have much at the moment. The important thing is the character. That job may be gone tomorrow. She could be sleeping around but with good money/job. She may want nothing to do with home but always all about business and money-making. U sure that’s what u want? So u see the answer is not so simple. What has worked through the ages is: the man goes out to bring and they MANAGE whatever he brings, while the woman takes care of the home! Nothing prevents her from doing small time jobs or biz. Once the children are grown she can then go big time

Kai....see better man! Are you in any way single and ready to mingle?? Trust me..I got all the good character but no job currently

2buffagain:


1) Is she in school? What course is she in? If she is not in school what is she doing or aiming at? Basically analyze her for potential as she no doubt did you.

2) Eww. Why would I want a house wife?
I would rather she apply herself to other things besides only just child rearing, be it business or an actual career. Keeps her interesting and realistic. We should both be able to come back home and trade stories of our victories and learn from each other, as opposed to just "guess what, Junior pooped on me today".

That can happen for a time, but that cannot be her entire life plan.

Reason is that will become a problem when that child grows up and no longer need her or leaves the house, like they are supposed to. What next for her? She has done nothing else over the years. She used that child as an excuse to not engage her mind in other things.

Also you hardly hear men being honest about this, but There are a lot of men who would end up disrespecting her because she is fully dependent on him for everything. This typically begins after his first financial strain.

This is the point where she starts feeling useless and starts looking for funny ways to find relevance for herself. I would rather spare my wife from that psychological turmoil.

Wifey will understand that, as much as we love our children, they must leave the nest. Her life must continue after they do, so she can't afford to make it all about the children. Even so, God forbid but if something were to happen to him, would it not be better that the woman actually has the capability to keep that family going? Instead of everything going to hell. She would then not even be able to provide for the children who she has made her whole life about.

That aside, nobody is trying to have that many children in this day and age. 2 is fine. _{I can be persuaded to 3, but she would have to convince me hard to get that high.}

I totally agree with the op. Nonetheless, this post reeks of double standards. Let's analyse this with the first two paragraph of your analogy, labelled 1 and 2.
1. So its right for a man to assess a woman's prospects and shoot his shot based on that, but women should not be allowed to assess a man's potentials too, right? Quite a hand full of women have been bashed on here due to the aforementioned factor.


2. Why would you want a house wife? Ofcourse, no one would want that, but a woman should not be crucified for not wanting a "house husband"too.

MrBrownJay1:
IMHO i dont think her income has anything to do with finding a right mate, and instead this should be primarily about the MINDSET of that person. a job is just a tool to "help" you guys have a better life, it aint a necessary foundation to assure anyone of a great union. yes , a lot of women out there are LIABILITIES, but having a job does not solve this issue. there are a lot of LIABILITIES out there that have jobs.

the important question Is: whats important for your family?! a wife with a job (that she could lose a week after wedding) OR a wife with good character (that she can never lose)?! there is a huge difference between a mentally/emotionally broke woman AND a woman who is currently unemployed.

Who says you can't have a wife with a good source of income and a good character still?



Never settle for less, money is importanter

All true...Its actually fun spending your own money, making ur own money and being content also prevents you from unnecessary distractions...

Nnemuka:
Bunch of lazy men wailing as usual
They want an under 18 virgin, graduate, earning 6figures who can give them children before she clocks 29..

Whereas the men do not need to have anything, just their preeks and a 10k salary

eediotas

See brutality

Word

On point op. So many benefits hidden with this advice. Guys take note

Ok OK

Unmarried Young Men
should follow the advise.A woman with skill and potential is very important. Time has changed.

In today world, only broke men marry broke, unemployed ladies without any sellable skill or profession


If you want a financially valuable lady as wife, then hustle to become financially buoyant if not na broke, chewing gum girls and ladies who love calling guys broke will be your only option oh lol.


If you want to marry a valuable lady as your wife, then just forget about marrying ladies below 27yrs because in Nigeria, ladies start having sense from 25yrs and then start becoming financially valuable from the age of 27yrs and above.


You cannot be looking for an instagram slay queen of 22 or 24yrs to marry and still expect to marry a financially valuable lady, it does not work that way.


Stop chasing instagram slay queens and all those bimbo whose only quality to offer to a man is their big nyash and big boobs

If you are a single guy reading this, no matter how rich you may think you are, please don't marry broke, unemployed lady with no sellable skill or sellable profession, it is a recipe for disaster. Marry wisely, marry with your brains just as ladies do.

Any room mate available in Abuja for this period of corona??

Loneliness de worry me for here

Food deh
Light deh
Water deh

People remove the God factor in finding their life partner. That is why fear of marriage won't end in a decade to come. Sometimes you may not understand what God is giving you untill you treasure it. Work or no work, money or no money, when God is involved in your marriage, you Will never regret it.

[i]NOTE: I am not saying go and marry an idiot because she makes money.... Obviously.
[/quote].

That's all

Speak it brother. I agree with you 100%

I concor

CHoccolaTE:
Personally I am all for female emancipation and women having jobs/not depending on some guy totally but topics like this are not for the average Nigerian man who believes he should be taken as a demi god by his wife.
You can't have a wife paying rent and buying food to feed her husband and and paying other bills and then her husband wants to exercise TOTAL control over her and the household in spite of her financial and domestic contributions.

That's why Nigerian women avoid men who want them to contribute financially.
Another thing is, after marriage the same man expecting his wife to split bills will expect her to be primarily responsible for housechores and be completely submissive and obedient to him. It doesnt work that way. If a woman starts feeding you or paying your bills you no longer have complete authority over her.
And it becomes imperative that you as the husband also take up housechores like cooking and cleaning and child care.

An average egotistical Nigerian man will not want to do all this.

House chores?
Like washing your pants and bra





Li

its only a gold digger that will be looking for a woman that makes money. like wtf
women are not even suppose to work in the real sense. f as a guy u are not capable to take care of wife and all females in your family,
YOU ARE USELESS
if my wife wants to work, then its ok. i am never gonna make it compulsory that she must work to support me.
idiots like u keep spreading stupid shit.
this op is a certified golddigger

Most men of this day are just lazyyyy

2buffagain:
Gentlemen. The reality of living in the 20th century has changed, and so must every notion formed from previous days that no longer hold weight today.

Women are not the only ones who should be asking what you do.
You should also be asking her what she does....and guaging her wifeability from her response.
Nobody likes to suffer...yourself included. So why sign up for a lifetime of every financial request of your immediate family (and possibly both your extended families ) coming to just you alone?

Gone are the days where families survived on one income alone. Those days, houses in Nigeria used to cost #5M or less. These same houses now cost well over #30M.

I can bet your income did not also inflate 6x over the same time.

The reality is that you need a wife who also brings something home, and honestly it should hopefully be around the same (or more God willing) of what you pull in.

This way one person's income can cover the family stuff and the other person's income goes towardssavings/investments/emergencies/joblessness buffering/ etc. Your family will go farther and you can even both retire earlier if this is done right.

Also Naija guys please, have some respect for yourself.
If you meet a girl and she has the mental configuration of always wanting money from you, just know that she is not the one.

As a sister here once said, "A girl who truly likes you, won't ask you for money...unless it's bad and you are her last resort."
Na woman talk am. Believe that sister. Peep that one game from her, and most of you will be alright.

If a girl really likes you, she'll be too busy trying to think of ways to be an asset to your life or impress you...not a taker.

Get you a girl who makes her money with a good source of income and who understands that her income is to be included in plans.

You have been told.
You should be done with your broke girl phase right about now ^{(much like how women should be done with their bad boy stage).}
It does nothing for your life.

NOTE: I am not saying go and marry an idiot because she makes money.... Obviously.
You are still looking for a good wife, who just ALSO happens to be equipped with income and/or good income prospects and drive.

I think it’s more important to know what u want.

Some men what a stay at home wife cos perhaps they are capable of footing the bills according to them.

Some men want an equal partner and friend as a wife and they basically handle everything well together.

Some men want a woman they can control so they don’t even want her being independent.

Some men want a wife who’s not a competition, while sm do. All these are variations of marriages and relationships.

So it wud be hard to put a law that a man shud get a well paid wife in all cases and Sm may not even want such. They wud Rather sacrifice the advantages of that for their our comfort zones and insecurities.

Of course