₦airaland Forum

Too hard on yourself. You are just too hard on yourself.

It is possible you are frequently dreaming about the things you think and worry about in your wakeful state. Unfortunately many humans don't know mindfulness and how to observe their thoughts without judgement. Your concerns during the day are what you dream about. The level of guilt is well embedded in your subconscious from your daily thought patterns. Especially concerned in the fact that:

1. You believe your aunt always wanted her kids to fare better. ( I have personal experiences with this. My mum was not the preferred wife for my dad, so my dads siblings hated her and me and my siblings. They would always want to compare and make statements that their kids will outdo us.)

2. You believe you abandoned them or could have been there for her when she was sick.

3. You believe they took ill because of an evil thing they did in the past.

You life has turned out great. Life is a school. You come here to learn lessons. In school some experiences are pleasant and some are not. You learn and move to the next class. Learn your lessons. Move on.


Do me a favour, go and ask your mum if she is aware of why they suddenly sent you back to her? There could have been so many reasons. Something could have transpired that you are u aware of. Secondly, try to avoid as much as you can the comparison of yourself with your cousins. It isn't a race. Some start well and fall along the way. Some start late and end early. Some start early and end late or end early. It isn't a competition. Everything has worked perfectly for you.

I recall a young boy we were training, his father came and took him away because he didn't like our religious beliefs. They cut off the opportunities for the young man to get very good and free education. One they were not even able to afford. They couldn't even afford the government schools. They accused us of brainwashing him. My family doesn't force any religion on anyone. So we all grew up to think freely and choose whatever it is we want to believe in.

charlesELIKIBA:
HELLP NAIRALANDERS

I will be brief with my writeup as much as possible so I can explain my connection with this lady.

My single mom gave me away at a tender age of 5 to her elder brother (financial difficulties i assume), this ''aunty'' happens to be the wife of this my mother's elder brother.

Aready they had 4 children, all boys.

The home was a tough upbringing with strict rules about socialising, we weren't allowed to bring friends home or go to friends places. It was pretty strict and my uncles wife i would say was the mastermind of it all, she was strict and mean maybe because it was a house of 5 boys.

Growing up in my uncles home, I wouldn't say I was treated diffrently because I always got matching outfits with my uncle's children during christmas, gifts during christmas, same portions of food BUT IN ALL I was always scared of doing somethings my cousins would do. I didn't feel free growing up, i felt diffrent from them. In some cases they attended the best schools than I (but I never attended a govt. school or a bad private school).

It's like if their school fees was 1m naira per term, mine would be 150,000 per term.

I lived with them until I was about 16 or 17 and one morning I woke up and they said i was going back to my mother at 15 or 16 like any kid, you would start to develop conscience (sense), maybe breaking some rules and being stubborn just like their own kids. This I assume was why they wanted to send me back to my mother OTHERWISE I CAN THINK OF NOTHING ELSE I DID WRONG OR DIFFRENT.

In all of these years living with them, I saw my mother as a strange person. I had no motherly connection with her. My anty to me, was my real mother. Whenever we went visiting my mother in very rare occasions, it was always awkward.

Well long story short, I found myself back in my mother's arms, to a new environment i knew nothing about and starting to learn to live with a woman called my mother. I was naive, had no choice but to accept realities on ground. Do you know that feeling of living in a pouch house and wake up next morning in a 1 room surrounded by thick bushes. Yes that was the change.

I was enrolled into a school, my uncle was repeatedly forced to send/ pay my schoolfees until i was in ss3 and i called him to inform him about waec enrolment. He told me on the phone ''all the exams i have been writing, how many have i passed'' and that was it. He never sent a dime anymore meanwhile at this point his children, my cousins were already miles ahead of me suddenly in education. When i left the home, the eldest son went to canada to school, the second who is my agemate was already in a private uni in Nigeria and the 3rd who i am senior to with a year is preparing to go to ukraine for school and years later the last born who i spoonfed and chewed meat for attended uni in Ghana.

Well long story short, since my uncle had failed me. My mother said it was time i go to my father. My father was old retired pensioner. My mother took me to him, as expected awkward encounter. I have never known this man, no memory of him. Well he said he would find my enrolment money and he did, he later passed on a year or two later.

I enrolled waec and pased in one sitting, thanks to miracle centres.

PS: i must say i was never an intelligent student. i wasn't even average but i wasn't the poorest and neither of my uncles children were better. We were all poor educationally.

Long story short another uncle sprang up and paid for my university diploma which i later acquiried.


YEARS LATER my uncle and aunty decided to move back to our home town, please note the home my mother stayed in was this my uncles home. It was the boy quarters, the main house was not even in sight as at the time i was returned to my mother. We did series of bush clearing and snakes killing lol. well my uncle returned home town after retirement and setup the main structure ( a 5 bed room duplex) and thats were they lived while i and my mother lived in the BQ.

I WAS very angry with myself that i happened to still live with them AGAIN, i needed to get out of their sight, my condition was bad. i was a mere teacher to some rickety school. In all of this my uncle's wife always ensured she knew what i was upto and she derived satisfaction when she knew i wasn't doing better than her kids who were all abroad. i turned to their errand boy again after years of neglect. i was very angry with myself and needed to save to get out of the house.

Well i did manage to save up and leave the house and i promised myself never to return to that house. i felt neglected, i felt they sent me away because the goodthings were coming and they couldn't bear to see me share in them because to me they were my parents.


YEARS LATER, my aunty was sick with cancer
please note before i left the home, my uncle and aunty always sent me to travel journeys to get them medicines from a monastry. i attended such trips severally and ran other seperate errands but i never dared to drive their car talkless ask for the key. i always washed their car in the mornings, i would never also dare to see myself in the living room of the duplex with the remote in hand. when they moved back to the hometown, that fear in my childhood started again but this time i was mature enough to know i would never m amount to anything in life if i continued this again hence the reason i needed to move out.

So my aunty sickness grew worse, the husband flew her to india and back but the sickness grew worse. in all of this cancer times i never went back to the house to see her. I only heard of her conditions from my siblings (my half siblings, my mother was married to 3 men in diffrent years and she had only me for my father, another for another man and 3 for another man, i was the lastborn of all).

Then my aunty died. The day she died, i saw her in my dreams and she was crying saying ''she forgave me''. A day or two later i went to my sisters store and she told me of my aunty death, i went to my rented apartment and cried profusely. i later summouned courage and maybe sympathy and went to my uncles house and i cried before my uncle and told him to forgive me too for all abandoning them all this while.

NOW ABOUT MY AUNTY SAYING SHE FORGAVE ME IN THE DREAM: i did not do her any wrong neither did i wish death on her. All her life her greatest fear was maybe i would become greater than her children. She loved these comparisms, i was never wicked to her, i never cursed her, i was never rude to her unless i some instances when she sends me errands and i tell her i have other things to do.... Otherwise i never was negative to her instead she is the one nobody likes, by nobody i mean my uncles family. Nobody talks good of her, they say she controls my uncle and also squandered his money but in all of this i never spoke of my experiences living with them and somethings they did wrong that made me feel diffrent, i did not even tell you guys neither have i told my mother ever. i don't see them as anything that would stop my growth in life. i hate to talk about the bad in people.

WELL BACK TO REASON THE TOPIC WAS CREATED, why do i keep repeatedly seeing her in my dreams even after her death and its always on a negative role. its either in the dream she still plays mother, or she is gossip about me in the dream or she is against me in the dream, just think of anything negative in a dream and she will be the mastermind. This is really beginning to worry me. Why is she still attached to me in the dreams?

After she died, her husband, my uncle started his own sickness but has been sick for years now, he is bed ridden. The family has repeatedly asked him if there is anything he and his late wife did in the past to amount such sickness were he is living in pain but refused to die and he would not answer. One time they said, he said ''it was out of ignorance'' and thats all he ever said about anything.

It will also be good to note that of all my 4 cousin brothers and i today, i am the most successful by far.

i just finished my house (a 3bedroom, 2 bedroom, 1 bedrrom bungalow)
january this year i bought my 3rd car.
i travel round the world effortlessly.
YES I DID TURN OUT FAR BETTER THAN MY COUSINS WHO YOU KNOW HAD THE BEST EDUCATION.

I don't want to talk of their conditions, lets concentrate on me.


So this is my much writeup... I had to skip many things so you can bear to read but please be free to ask me questions.

Why do I repeatedly see my aunty in my dreams.... just before this writeup, i had just woken up from another dream she was present in, she was whispering to the ears of a very good friend of mine and then the friends turned to me and was like '' ah cahrles na so you be''?...and i was angry and was like '' how can you believe something someone you just met told you against i your best friends word'' and minutes later dream ended and i woke up.

At this point i am thinking of going spiritual to know why this is happening but this will be a first in my life. There are two popular places i have never being in my life until lately last year... One is a shrine and the other is a police station. Last year was my first time to be in a police station.
I was driving my unregistered car. That was my offence.

YOU ARE A NARSSISISTIC ASSHOLE!!! That family made you who you are . ASSHOLE!!!

charlesELIKIBA:
HELLP NAIRALANDERS

I will be brief with my writeup as much as possible so I can explain my connection with this lady.

My single mom gave me away at a tender age of 5 to her elder brother (financial difficulties i assume), this ''aunty'' happens to be the wife of this my mother's elder brother.

Aready they had 4 children, all boys.

The home was a tough upbringing with strict rules about socialising, we weren't allowed to bring friends home or go to friends places. It was pretty strict and my uncles wife i would say was the mastermind of it all, she was strict and mean maybe because it was a house of 5 boys.

Growing up in my uncles home, I wouldn't say I was treated diffrently because I always got matching outfits with my uncle's children during christmas, gifts during christmas, same portions of food BUT IN ALL I was always scared of doing somethings my cousins would do. I didn't feel free growing up, i felt diffrent from them. In some cases they attended the best schools than I (but I never attended a govt. school or a bad private school).

It's like if their school fees was 1m naira per term, mine would be 150,000 per term.

I lived with them until I was about 16 or 17 and one morning I woke up and they said i was going back to my mother at 15 or 16 like any kid, you would start to develop conscience (sense), maybe breaking some rules and being stubborn just like their own kids. This I assume was why they wanted to send me back to my mother OTHERWISE I CAN THINK OF NOTHING ELSE I DID WRONG OR DIFFRENT.

In all of these years living with them, I saw my mother as a strange person. I had no motherly connection with her. My anty to me, was my real mother. Whenever we went visiting my mother in very rare occasions, it was always awkward.

Well long story short, I found myself back in my mother's arms, to a new environment i knew nothing about and starting to learn to live with a woman called my mother. I was naive, had no choice but to accept realities on ground. Do you know that feeling of living in a pouch house and wake up next morning in a 1 room surrounded by thick bushes. Yes that was the change.

I was enrolled into a school, my uncle was repeatedly forced to send/ pay my schoolfees until i was in ss3 and i called him to inform him about waec enrolment. He told me on the phone ''all the exams i have been writing, how many have i passed'' and that was it. He never sent a dime anymore meanwhile at this point his children, my cousins were already miles ahead of me suddenly in education. When i left the home, the eldest son went to canada to school, the second who is my agemate was already in a private uni in Nigeria and the 3rd who i am senior to with a year is preparing to go to ukraine for school and years later the last born who i spoonfed and chewed meat for attended uni in Ghana.

Well long story short, since my uncle had failed me. My mother said it was time i go to my father. My father was old retired pensioner. My mother took me to him, as expected awkward encounter. I have never known this man, no memory of him. Well he said he would find my enrolment money and he did, he later passed on a year or two later.

I enrolled waec and pased in one sitting, thanks to miracle centres.

PS: i must say i was never an intelligent student. i wasn't even average but i wasn't the poorest and neither of my uncles children were better. We were all poor educationally.

Long story short another uncle sprang up and paid for my university diploma which i later acquiried.


YEARS LATER my uncle and aunty decided to move back to our home town, please note the home my mother stayed in was this my uncles home. It was the boy quarters, the main house was not even in sight as at the time i was returned to my mother. We did series of bush clearing and snakes killing lol. well my uncle returned home town after retirement and setup the main structure ( a 5 bed room duplex) and thats were they lived while i and my mother lived in the BQ.

I WAS very angry with myself that i happened to still live with them AGAIN, i needed to get out of their sight, my condition was bad. i was a mere teacher to some rickety school. In all of this my uncle's wife always ensured she knew what i was upto and she derived satisfaction when she knew i wasn't doing better than her kids who were all abroad. i turned to their errand boy again after years of neglect. i was very angry with myself and needed to save to get out of the house.

Well i did manage to save up and leave the house and i promised myself never to return to that house. i felt neglected, i felt they sent me away because the goodthings were coming and they couldn't bear to see me share in them because to me they were my parents.


YEARS LATER, my aunty was sick with cancer
please note before i left the home, my uncle and aunty always sent me to travel journeys to get them medicines from a monastry. i attended such trips severally and ran other seperate errands but i never dared to drive their car talkless ask for the key. i always washed their car in the mornings, i would never also dare to see myself in the living room of the duplex with the remote in hand. when they moved back to the hometown, that fear in my childhood started again but this time i was mature enough to know i would never m amount to anything in life if i continued this again hence the reason i needed to move out.

So my aunty sickness grew worse, the husband flew her to india and back but the sickness grew worse. in all of this cancer times i never went back to the house to see her. I only heard of her conditions from my siblings (my half siblings, my mother was married to 3 men in diffrent years and she had only me for my father, another for another man and 3 for another man, i was the lastborn of all).

Then my aunty died. The day she died, i saw her in my dreams and she was crying saying ''she forgave me''. A day or two later i went to my sisters store and she told me of my aunty death, i went to my rented apartment and cried profusely. i later summouned courage and maybe sympathy and went to my uncles house and i cried before my uncle and told him to forgive me too for all abandoning them all this while.

NOW ABOUT MY AUNTY SAYING SHE FORGAVE ME IN THE DREAM: i did not do her any wrong neither did i wish death on her. All her life her greatest fear was maybe i would become greater than her children. She loved these comparisms, i was never wicked to her, i never cursed her, i was never rude to her unless i some instances when she sends me errands and i tell her i have other things to do.... Otherwise i never was negative to her instead she is the one nobody likes, by nobody i mean my uncles family. Nobody talks good of her, they say she controls my uncle and also squandered his money but in all of this i never spoke of my experiences living with them and somethings they did wrong that made me feel diffrent, i did not even tell you guys neither have i told my mother ever. i don't see them as anything that would stop my growth in life. i hate to talk about the bad in people.

WELL BACK TO REASON THE TOPIC WAS CREATED, why do i keep repeatedly seeing her in my dreams even after her death and its always on a negative role. its either in the dream she still plays mother, or she is gossip about me in the dream or she is against me in the dream, just think of anything negative in a dream and she will be the mastermind. This is really beginning to worry me. Why is she still attached to me in the dreams?

After she died, her husband, my uncle started his own sickness but has been sick for years now, he is bed ridden. The family has repeatedly asked him if there is anything he and his late wife did in the past to amount such sickness were he is living in pain but refused to die and he would not answer. One time they said, he said ''it was out of ignorance'' and thats all he ever said about anything.

It will also be good to note that of all my 4 cousin brothers and i today, i am the most successful by far.

i just finished my house (a 3bedroom, 2 bedroom, 1 bedrrom bungalow)
january this year i bought my 3rd car.
i travel round the world effortlessly.
YES I DID TURN OUT FAR BETTER THAN MY COUSINS WHO YOU KNOW HAD THE BEST EDUCATION.

I don't want to talk of their conditions, lets concentrate on me.


So this is my much writeup... I had to skip many things so you can bear to read but please be free to ask me questions.

Why do I repeatedly see my aunty in my dreams.... just before this writeup, i had just woken up from another dream she was present in, she was whispering to the ears of a very good friend of mine and then the friends turned to me and was like '' ah cahrles na so you be''?...and i was angry and was like '' how can you believe something someone you just met told you against i your best friends word'' and minutes later dream ended and i woke up.

At this point i am thinking of going spiritual to know why this is happening but this will be a first in my life. There are two popular places i have never being in my life until lately last year... One is a shrine and the other is a police station. Last year was my first time to be in a police station.
I was driving my unregistered car. That was my offence.

concerning the topic, I don't have anything to say, I'm just happy with your success story

Dear op, i urge u to engage in fasting and prayer for seven days....cry to GOD. And see every unanswered question answered.


2.is that DAVID LUIZ At your (DP)profile picture.

I suspect your star was used by your uncle and aunt

Please don't go spiritual

Not worth it

Only one solution, "ghost meat peppersoup"

Anyone that raised you till you were 16 is your mother. End of story

Think and reason am by yourself from there


Na your conscience dey fight you no be her

charlesELIKIBA:
I know this... am not scared I won't lie. just worried why she's always in my dreams.

I didn't even wish her death sef.

fake story

Going spiritual, you certainly need to go to the Lord spiritually and I am very sure a lot will be reveal to you. The Lord's cover will continue to be upon you in Jesus name.

Shalom.

Forgive , forget and move on

charlesELIKIBA:
HELLP NAIRALANDERS

I will be brief with my writeup as much as possible so I can explain my connection with this lady.

My single mom gave me away at a tender age of 5 to her elder brother (financial difficulties i assume), this ''aunty'' happens to be the wife of this my mother's elder brother.

Aready they had 4 children, all boys.

The home was a tough upbringing with strict rules about socialising, we weren't allowed to bring friends home or go to friends places. It was pretty strict and my uncles wife i would say was the mastermind of it all, she was strict and mean maybe because it was a house of 5 boys.

Growing up in my uncles home, I wouldn't say I was treated diffrently because I always got matching outfits with my uncle's children during christmas, gifts during christmas, same portions of food BUT IN ALL I was always scared of doing somethings my cousins would do. I didn't feel free growing up, i felt diffrent from them. In some cases they attended the best schools than I (but I never attended a govt. school or a bad private school).

It's like if their school fees was 1m naira per term, mine would be 150,000 per term.

I lived with them until I was about 16 or 17 and one morning I woke up and they said i was going back to my mother at 15 or 16 like any kid, you would start to develop conscience (sense), maybe breaking some rules and being stubborn just like their own kids. This I assume was why they wanted to send me back to my mother OTHERWISE I CAN THINK OF NOTHING ELSE I DID WRONG OR DIFFRENT.

In all of these years living with them, I saw my mother as a strange person. I had no motherly connection with her. My anty to me, was my real mother. Whenever we went visiting my mother in very rare occasions, it was always awkward.

Well long story short, I found myself back in my mother's arms, to a new environment i knew nothing about and starting to learn to live with a woman called my mother. I was naive, had no choice but to accept realities on ground. Do you know that feeling of living in a pouch house and wake up next morning in a 1 room surrounded by thick bushes. Yes that was the change.

I was enrolled into a school, my uncle was repeatedly forced to send/ pay my schoolfees until i was in ss3 and i called him to inform him about waec enrolment. He told me on the phone ''all the exams i have been writing, how many have i passed'' and that was it. He never sent a dime anymore meanwhile at this point his children, my cousins were already miles ahead of me suddenly in education. When i left the home, the eldest son went to canada to school, the second who is my agemate was already in a private uni in Nigeria and the 3rd who i am senior to with a year is preparing to go to ukraine for school and years later the last born who i spoonfed and chewed meat for attended uni in Ghana.

Well long story short, since my uncle had failed me. My mother said it was time i go to my father. My father was old retired pensioner. My mother took me to him, as expected awkward encounter. I have never known this man, no memory of him. Well he said he would find my enrolment money and he did, he later passed on a year or two later.

I enrolled waec and pased in one sitting, thanks to miracle centres.

PS: i must say i was never an intelligent student. i wasn't even average but i wasn't the poorest and neither of my uncles children were better. We were all poor educationally.

Long story short another uncle sprang up and paid for my university diploma which i later acquiried.


YEARS LATER my uncle and aunty decided to move back to our home town, please note the home my mother stayed in was this my uncles home. It was the boy quarters, the main house was not even in sight as at the time i was returned to my mother. We did series of bush clearing and snakes killing lol. well my uncle returned home town after retirement and setup the main structure ( a 5 bed room duplex) and thats were they lived while i and my mother lived in the BQ.

I WAS very angry with myself that i happened to still live with them AGAIN, i needed to get out of their sight, my condition was bad. i was a mere teacher to some rickety school. In all of this my uncle's wife always ensured she knew what i was upto and she derived satisfaction when she knew i wasn't doing better than her kids who were all abroad. i turned to their errand boy again after years of neglect. i was very angry with myself and needed to save to get out of the house.

Well i did manage to save up and leave the house and i promised myself never to return to that house. i felt neglected, i felt they sent me away because the goodthings were coming and they couldn't bear to see me share in them because to me they were my parents.


YEARS LATER, my aunty was sick with cancer
please note before i left the home, my uncle and aunty always sent me to travel journeys to get them medicines from a monastry. i attended such trips severally and ran other seperate errands but i never dared to drive their car talkless ask for the key. i always washed their car in the mornings, i would never also dare to see myself in the living room of the duplex with the remote in hand. when they moved back to the hometown, that fear in my childhood started again but this time i was mature enough to know i would never m amount to anything in life if i continued this again hence the reason i needed to move out.

So my aunty sickness grew worse, the husband flew her to india and back but the sickness grew worse. in all of this cancer times i never went back to the house to see her. I only heard of her conditions from my siblings (my half siblings, my mother was married to 3 men in diffrent years and she had only me for my father, another for another man and 3 for another man, i was the lastborn of all).

Then my aunty died. The day she died, i saw her in my dreams and she was crying saying ''she forgave me''. A day or two later i went to my sisters store and she told me of my aunty death, i went to my rented apartment and cried profusely. i later summouned courage and maybe sympathy and went to my uncles house and i cried before my uncle and told him to forgive me too for all abandoning them all this while.

NOW ABOUT MY AUNTY SAYING SHE FORGAVE ME IN THE DREAM: i did not do her any wrong neither did i wish death on her. All her life her greatest fear was maybe i would become greater than her children. She loved these comparisms, i was never wicked to her, i never cursed her, i was never rude to her unless i some instances when she sends me errands and i tell her i have other things to do.... Otherwise i never was negative to her instead she is the one nobody likes, by nobody i mean my uncles family. Nobody talks good of her, they say she controls my uncle and also squandered his money but in all of this i never spoke of my experiences living with them and somethings they did wrong that made me feel diffrent, i did not even tell you guys neither have i told my mother ever. i don't see them as anything that would stop my growth in life. i hate to talk about the bad in people.

WELL BACK TO REASON THE TOPIC WAS CREATED, why do i keep repeatedly seeing her in my dreams even after her death and its always on a negative role. its either in the dream she still plays mother, or she is gossip about me in the dream or she is against me in the dream, just think of anything negative in a dream and she will be the mastermind. This is really beginning to worry me. Why is she still attached to me in the dreams?

After she died, her husband, my uncle started his own sickness but has been sick for years now, he is bed ridden. The family has repeatedly asked him if there is anything he and his late wife did in the past to amount such sickness were he is living in pain but refused to die and he would not answer. One time they said, he said ''it was out of ignorance'' and thats all he ever said about anything.

It will also be good to note that of all my 4 cousin brothers and i today, i am the most successful by far.

i just finished my house (a 3bedroom, 2 bedroom, 1 bedrrom bungalow)
january this year i bought my 3rd car.
i travel round the world effortlessly.
YES I DID TURN OUT FAR BETTER THAN MY COUSINS WHO YOU KNOW HAD THE BEST EDUCATION.

I don't want to talk of their conditions, lets concentrate on me.


So this is my much writeup... I had to skip many things so you can bear to read but please be free to ask me questions.

Why do I repeatedly see my aunty in my dreams.... just before this writeup, i had just woken up from another dream she was present in, she was whispering to the ears of a very good friend of mine and then the friends turned to me and was like '' ah cahrles na so you be''?...and i was angry and was like '' how can you believe something someone you just met told you against i your best friends word'' and minutes later dream ended and i woke up.

At this point i am thinking of going spiritual to know why this is happening but this will be a first in my life. There are two popular places i have never being in my life until lately last year... One is a shrine and the other is a police station. Last year was my first time to be in a police station.
I was driving my unregistered car. That was my offence.

Your aunty didnt do you any wrong and your uncle did you no wrong.
First of all, you're seeing her in your dream because of your Guilt complex, and you still see her that way. You have something bothering you, perhaps you feel that you are not worth the good of Gods gift.

So God came as your aunt in the dream to tell you " I've forgiven you, don't be guilty again." But you paid no attention and still felt guilty. That's was bothering you. Discard your guilt and you'll be free.

For your uncle, he did nothing. He believes because he wickedly tortured you as his slave, then God is punsihing him. But that's not true. God loves you all, so he doesn't judge for wickedness. He is a God of infinite love.

Pray for your uncle now, he needs it. Believe he is free and also free yourself from your guilt complex. Your uncle is your responsibility, save his life by believing he is whole. Bless you bro

Professorcplus:
Not moved by your last statement though. I read your write-up twice and I never see where your uncle and his wife gone wrong. He sponsored you to the point of enrolling for waec exam and you developed hatred in your mind towards his family because of silly excuse.

Even if he sponsored your uni, you will still tagged his a bad person for not securing you a "good job". Quote me.

I repeat, you need to develop a positive mental attitude in your behaviour, thought and speech and never portray them as an antagonist in your story but instead focus more on your challenges and how you overcome it despite all odds to motivate someone and even your "future" kids.

Only if you hear other's people worse experience and yet they never form hatred to people involved. Remember what goes around comes around. If you postulate a harmful belief among your circles, sooner or later, your will be in their position and they will use same belief on you.

Count your losses and celebrate your victory.

Mr man keep quite

Psalm 51 and psalm 91...

Thank me later.
Anytime u wana sleep.

Put your two feet inside and stand on the bible while opened from the middle.

Cheers.

Professorcplus:
By their words ye shall know them. Every word you type dispute of envy, bitterness, competition, comparison which is a bad sign of poor mental health

Lets turn the table around. Imagine you as a man bear responsibilities of a child owned by two irresponsible adult as a result of their wayward life style.

Made sure the child wasn't starved, was clothed, given quality education and still insist his wife must treat you like her child and not a slave. Made you part of his family even when no one cares about you.

Only for this child to grow up and blame you for his misfortunes...

You are ungrateful. The education the man invested in you is a waste. He brought you up to add value to the society but you choose to constitute nuisance to the society.

He didn't train you to compare you with his children.
He didn't train you to compete with his children.
He didn't train you to become a bitter man.
He has given you every basic need of life.
He trained you to become a good dad, good husband and supporting man, and reciprocate the love he showed you but you choose to hatred.

I will advise you to have a positive mental attitude towards their kids and people around you and stop comparing your success to their.

Don’t mind the entitled ingrate

You’re so ungrateful to this family even after dead. The day you realize and appreciate the good they deed to you is the day you’ll experience true peace.
You owe your uncle and your cousins an apology, the spirit of envy is worst than witchcraft.
Please visit any nearby MFM for deliverance.

1. If you are born again then you have nothing to worry about.

2. You will continue to see her in your dreams probably for the rest of your life.

3. Ben Carson once said the brain is a miracle, its th most intricate computer in the world, the stored data in our memory are replayed in different forms while asleep.

4. As a child of God you have the power to claim and cancels any dreams that bothers you. You can call her name and command her not to appear in your dream again.

5. If you stretch this matter too long you may be setting yourself up with fake "Pastors".

6. Forgive your uncle and everyone, be grateful for the little they did for you, they even tried pass some uncles and after all no be him be your papa.

7. Hold God tight. God bless you.

charlesELIKIBA:
thanks so much but I really don't feel that guilt like you said. I already begged my uncle to forgive me for that when I payed him a condolence visit. so I don't think I have that guilt

... and with my uncles illness now I am doing things way more differently maybe not at full force but it's different.

I am a happy man in life, it's just this persistent dreams of her and she's always negative in this dreams, that's my problem now. like someone said earlier, I shouldn't have any business with the dead in my dreams, not when I didn't have even the slightest wish for her death.

Sorry you did not do anything wrong by leaving them, first of all they sent you off remember, besides they have their own children that didn't stay with them to run errands in the village so you can't feel guilty you also have your own life to live.
What is good for the goose is also good for the gander. You are not destined to live in the village forever. Maybe today you would have been on the same spot wandering and living as village champion.
If they really needed someone around they would have called their kids or get a maid.
Don't ever feel guilty for leaving. You simply left to fend for yourself like their kids did. No offense in doing that also. I don't even think you should apologize for leaving.

As for the dreams see a real man of God and be prayerful. Make the book of psalms your companion.

Probably nothing

Thatsbnotmyoir aunty; she's dead and gone. The likeness of her that you see in your dream is not her.

charlesELIKIBA:
front page please
@lalasticlala

Since you're doing so well despite their negative influences on your life, just let go of the bitterness so that you can go higher. Start praying for that your aunty before you sleep, ask God to show her the way. if you do that you won't see her anymore.

My advice is that you say midnight prayers. Also please try as much as possible to help you 4 cousins.

[color=#] 2577629[/color]

Eberejesus111:
Your aunty didnt do you any wrong and your uncle did you no wrong.
First of all, you're seeing her in your dream because of your Guilt complex, and you still see her that way. You have something bothering you, perhaps you feel that you are not worth the good of Gods gift.

So God came as your aunt in the dream to tell you " I've forgiven you, don't be guilty again." But you paid no attention and still felt guilty. That's was bothering you. Discard your guilt and you'll be free.

For your uncle, he did nothing. He believes because he wickedly tortured you as his slave, then God is punsihing him. But that's not true. God loves you all, so he doesn't judge for wickedness. He is a God of infinite love.

Your assertions that they both did nothing wrong says you do not have the dept to begin offering solutions.

All of you coming here to state that both the uncle and his wife didn't do anything wrong are either inconsiderate or shallow. Another reason may be that you are presently maltreating somebody's child, a colleague at work or just something similar and are trying to sooth your consciences by downplaying the effect of apparent wrongs done to this guy.

[color=#] 512874[/color]

If you are a muslim who believes, just make a spitting sound on your palms, read the 3 qul and rub all over your body before you sleep. Nothing will disturb the peaceful sleep that you'll have

Foodqueen:
Going spiritual or running around from one place to another will only give you the problems you never thought u could ever have.

Let her remain in your dreams, she can't do nothing to u.

Good advise. Going about will do him more harm. Give your life to Christ. Study and meditate on the Word ...then ur problem vanishes

You have that inherent problem of entitlement that almost everyone has. To start with, they aren’t your parents. You should be very grateful that they gave you a better value for your life. You made mention of being stubborn when you became a teenager, so let me ask, did you forget where you were coming from? Comparing yourself and their children is totally wrong and it shows jealousy and bitterness.
They did all the good they did for you out of their kindness and benevolence, for that you should be eternally grateful. You should help yourself by letting go of the grudges you have against them. Work hard and make sure your own children won’t go through this same experience. No be them do you, na your destiny just Dey different.

These are the reasons I will never train other people's children, they mostly turns out ungreatful.
You were not angry with your inresponsible mother and father but your uncle and his wife that were part of the success you are boastfully about.
It is guilt in your heart that is making you see your uncle's wife in the dream.
Stop comparing yourself with your uncle's children their father did not train you to compete with his children
Move on with your life bro. There is more to life than all these

CAPSLOCKED:
ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR HER MURDER?
FROM ALL INFORMATION GATHERED FROM THOUSANDS OF SPIRITUALISTS AND PROPHETS ON THIS FORUM IT APPEARS THAT YOUR LIFE IS IN GREAT DANGER FROM THIS WOMAN.

DO YOU DREAM OF DEAD PEOPLE?
DO YOU EAT IN DREAMS?
DO YOU SUFFER FROM GENERATIONAL CURSES, OR YOU'RE BEING FOLLOWED BY OCCULTIC SPIRITS AND DELEGATES FROM THE MARINE KINGDOM?

THE ONLY WAY OUT OF ALL YOUR SPIRITUAL PROBLEMS IS TO REALIZE THERE ARE NO "SPIRITUAL PROBLEMS", AND DREAMS ARE JUST DREAMS, AND CAN NEVER DETERMINE YOUR REALITY.

I WAS ONCE LIKE YOU. PARANOID ABOUT SPIRITS AND DEAD PEOPLE AND CHARMS.
THEN I GREW INTO A TEENAGER AND DUMPED SILLY RELIGIOUS AND SUPERSTITIOUS BELIEFS I WAS FED BY NIGERIAN NEIGHBORS AND RELATIVES AS A CHILD.
TODAY I'M DOING JUST FINE, AND GRAB A BEER AFTER EACH BAD DREAM OR THREATS FROM SO CALLED OCCULTIC PEOPLE... BECAUSE I DON'T BELIEVE IN NONSENSE.

nawah the way you reason this mata sef tire me

@op
As a child,I felt you thought your uncle and aunty ought to treat you better,the truth is they actually don't owe you nada,no be them born you.To have trained you to 15/16 is a thing of gratitude,your anger should be everly channeled to your mum and dad,you even have no right to resent your cousins,or aunt or uncle.you should be forever grateful to them, really.
Truth be told they tried for you,they gave you the foundation of this your success story. Your story shows envy,revenge,hatred.
And with the tone of how you've blown, financially,as compared to your cousins seems like a long fight finally won,like you had the last laugh .They did everything for you but the waec fee ,na the crime wey he commit( I know it hurts actually) but like I said,no be him born you, probably he got tired,had plans for just 4 kids,and another kid got added,yet no finances provided from this kid parent,haba if na you,you go tire na.
I feel,you still holding the hurts of your childhood,let go,reach out to your cousins,it ain't their fault they had better life,it's where they found themselves.Stop feeling superior.

About your aunt,me sef no know why she go dey appear for your dream,but I think it's just your mind playing you. Going to see a spiritualist can create problem where there is none .
Just forgive your fam,and let peace rule your heart.

Bro.i have gone through ur post and the answer u seek lies within u.i don't know how prayerful u are but we were meant to understand that whatever we seek of the Lord shall be revealed to us by the holy Spirit.go into prayer,pour out ur heart to God.tell him to reveal the mystery behind ur dreams.pray for the soul of ur Aunty to rest in peace.so that she will let u be.and the next time you see her in ur dreams ask her her purpose of coming to u.if she doesn't have any genuine reasons rebuke her.