Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? - Romance - Nairaland
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| Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by TheAviator2000: 7:19am On Feb 12, 2021 |
I really need wise counsel and will try to make this post as short as possible My girlfriend and I have been together since 2015. I left Naija in 2017 and since then, our relationship has been more of long distance except for the one time I came back. While I truly love her and wish to Marry her, there are some things that are giving me concerns and I would like to hear other people's perspective: 1- When I met my girl in 2015, I was an unemployed graduate wrapping up my NYSC. She was a fashion designer/Tailor and didn't have any formal higher education (University Level). 2- Fast forward to 2021, I am a consultant in a fortune 500 company and have grown so much in any measurable aspect of Life. My girlfriend is still a fashion designer and not too long ago, I helped her get a shop in Lagos and Have been sending her steady allowance (at least average of 40-50k a month). Here are the things that have given me a lot of worries: 1- I know everyone will not get a formal education and I am fine with that but my girl has not been hustling/pulling her weight in her chosen career despite my extra support.... I sometimes get the feeling that all she wants is to get married and get comfortable but I want an industrious woman. Formal education or not, I want a woman that can hussle! 2- Recently, I pretended to be unemployed because of Coronavirus just to see if she would send me some money (even if its 10k) or really, anything she can afford. Looking at the fact that I had always supported her month after month, I wanted to see if she would do the same for me. I pretended to be unemployed for almost a month and did not receive any form of financial support from her. Even when I directly asked her to loan me small money, she would play it off by saying something like "I go write you check for 1 million sef"..... I am thinking of breaking it off at this point by slowly letting her go but before I do that, I want the perspective of people here. Please, no insult! I am genuinely seeking your insight. Be kind! ps. My family are doing really well and I support anything they do. I have never neglected my family in anyway, shape or form. 12 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by JOACHINpedro: 7:23am On Feb 12, 2021 |
Good morning Sir. 5yrs in relationship no be beans o. Make person daughter no kill you for wasting her time. 3 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by EmptyGarden(m): 7:24am On Feb 12, 2021 |
Not a fan of Nollywood. 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by Shedrack777: 7:24am On Feb 12, 2021 |
i dey come |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by Redoil: 7:24am On Feb 12, 2021 |
all these boys forming men online after advicing you, you will still go ahead and do what your mind tells you to do 20 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by Nobody: 7:27am On Feb 12, 2021 |
Sheet, i feel you bro. . 5 years....damn If you really love her, you two can find her something ways to increase her income. She may want to give you the rabas but maybe she can't afford to. But if she just wants "to be taken kia off" reason the future and do your bidding. This economy/country no gree make only one pesin dey work. 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by Hugomexis(m): 7:27am On Feb 12, 2021 |
Dump the money hungry hoe.
You've spoilt her with money that's why she's now ambitionless. Dump the hoe and date your level,man. 27 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by BlessedNuel: 7:32am On Feb 12, 2021 |
JOACHINpedro: That's if he is the only one she dey date....bros might be the Number 10 on that payroll list  8 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by BlessedNuel: 7:33am On Feb 12, 2021 |
Bros...make I tell you something If a woman doesn’t spend on you then she doesn’t like or love you.... Women have money but only spend it on things and people they love. My one cent thoo  22 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by magicminister: 7:37am On Feb 12, 2021 |
Complicated situation bro! I think you should talk to her and let her know how you feel. This is assuming you haven’t done that already. All the best. 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by MickzyDonald: 7:38am On Feb 12, 2021 |
She might be digging some endless tunnel while you are away, but you dont have the idea of that, you might not be the only one she is dating sef, but the joy of telling people her boyfriend is outside the country is still making her magnet attract yours,so I'd suggest you come out plain to her, but in a calm and responsible manner 5 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by Nobody: 7:38am On Feb 12, 2021 |
If you don't suspect her for anything olosho, then go ahead and marry her because truly, woman no dey ever get money to give man unless the man na redpill. 3 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by JOACHINpedro: 7:40am On Feb 12, 2021 |
BlessedNuel:Likely sha. But few months is enough to know someone's real identity in a relationship. And it becomes easier when the guy is unemployed and still hustling. Now 5yrs don go and baba still dy surf her net while contemplating on 'japadizing'. Check am, e get as e be na 4 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by TheAviator2000: 7:42am On Feb 12, 2021 |
JOACHINpedro: We have never had sex. Met her a virgin and never pressured her for sex as she wasn;t ready! 5 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by TheAviator2000: 7:44am On Feb 12, 2021 |
Redoil: I appealed for respect. I know this is a largely anonymous website and people tend to be savage but I appealed to everyone to keep it civil! Lets be guided please. 3 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by BlessedNuel: 7:45am On Feb 12, 2021 |
TheAviator2000: Good of you..... @Joachinpedro no be matter of surfing net.....Anty fit be Keziah via her own end since na long distance relationship. Trust a woman at your own peril ...no be only you dey chop the puff-puff. 5 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by TheAviator2000: 7:45am On Feb 12, 2021 |
MickzyDonald: I trust her! I know for a fact that she's loyal! 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by Nobody: 7:45am On Feb 12, 2021 |
According to your other thread you've been confused about this girl since last year. You really shouldn't be confused about someone after 5-years of dating. Besides, didn't people advise you in the other thread? 5 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by BlessedNuel: 7:47am On Feb 12, 2021 |
TheAviator2000: Shey the CCTV camera wey you tag pon her na 10G ni ? 9 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by TheAviator2000: 7:47am On Feb 12, 2021 |
aroundtheearth: Its a hard decision to be honest if you are in love lol! You keep giving people chances hoping for a miracle 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by TheAviator2000: 7:48am On Feb 12, 2021 |
BlessedNuel: Its called trust! I trust her and she hasn't given me a MAJOR reason not to! 4 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by EJanni(f): 7:48am On Feb 12, 2021 |
She wasn't idle when you met her, till this moment and you're still complaining that She's not hussling. When she buys Prado SUV out of the blues, you will still come here to rant on how she made the money. I keep saying it, Nigerian men have a huge cultural and psychological problems. You people should change your mentality. 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by BlessedNuel: 7:49am On Feb 12, 2021 |
TheAviator2000: Okay bro.....I wish you all the best. Stay and play safe |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by TheAviator2000: 7:50am On Feb 12, 2021 |
EJanni: She wasn't Idle when I met her and I wasn't Idle too. Please read the post again and read to understand and not attack. be unbiased and offer your best opinion. 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by JOACHINpedro: 7:53am On Feb 12, 2021 |
TheAviator2000:Wow, that's remarkable Big Congratulations Sire. The disadvantage She go miss you more than ever for not making her kpekus your priority. Heartbreak X10 @BlessedNuel Auntie say she be tear-rubber, let's assume she no misbehave. She go dy for loosing end big time esp if she fall for a player in her second missionary relationship journey. Life wey no balance 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by MickzyDonald: 7:54am On Feb 12, 2021 |
TheAviator2000:I know you trust her,, but I'd advice you not to trust her that much, anything can happen bro 6 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by EJanni(f): 7:55am On Feb 12, 2021 |
TheAviator2000:my attack is on where you said "you needed a hustling lady, whether educated or not. And I'm trying to know what you really want from her since she's already doing that. 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by MrWondah(m): 7:57am On Feb 12, 2021 |
TheAviator2000: This is your answer bro. 5 years no be beans. She was with you even when you no get. E fit be say you dey nack for overseas but she dey for you. I can only say RUN if she's unfaithful. On the issue of sending you money, I can only say she found it hard to believe you were broke. I can tell you, the redpillers will give you reasons to doubt her 5 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by zealousayo(m): 7:58am On Feb 12, 2021 |
TheAviator2000: Is she a deeper Life Church member? To your post, I seriously do not like partners that are not supportive. What if you truly were unemployed and seriously in need of money, so that's she would allow hunger to deal with you despite the fact you always support her. Also, a man or a woman in this age should be ambitious and passionate. lYou're just her meal ticket. Is she loyal to you? Are you sure you are not a supporting striker? Are you sure she's still a virgin? Do that thing you have in mind (most times, our instincts are always right). Don't loose guard ooo. I wish you well sir. 4 Likes |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by TheAviator2000: 8:04am On Feb 12, 2021 |
EJanni: Thank you for clearing things up. Yes, she is hussling but from my perspective, she isn't doing nearly enough to become successful. I will be happy if she makes 10 kobo knowing she is doing her best. As a designer, one would expect she would heavily leverage social media (Twitter, Instagram, etc). I have linked her up with a top photo designer and even sent her money to pay for the design so she can start building her brand. Paid for her to go to one of the best fashion schools in Lagos. Part of the reason I send her regular cash is so she can have enough data to also project her brand online and hopefully, make more money for herself! She is an excellent tailor and I am based in a country where African inspired outfits are becoming fashion trends and can make a lot of money locally and internationally but she appears to be comfortable receiving 3k - 10k per outfit! She is very hardworking but hard work without innovation wouldn't take anyone far like that. I hope you get what I mean now! I want her to be successful. I want us to be successful because one person cannot do it alone. 8 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Continue With This Relationship Or Should I Leave?????? by TheAviator2000: 8:08am On Feb 12, 2021 |
zealousayo: Thank you sir or Ma. You perfectly get my perspective. I have been very supportive of everything she does and never received anything from her until 2020 Christmas (got a shirt). Even in the midst of my struggle, she told me someone (a family member) gave her 100k to help her renovate the shop and I asked her to loan me small...... for the level of support I have given, I would expect her to gladly send me everything and more. So, to say I am disappointed and feel alone is an understatement! Its been me all alot making real sacrifices from my own hard work. Never the other way around and now I gave her the opportunity to show she can come through for me, but she fall hand. 2 Likes |
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