₦airaland Forum

This is your cross. Carry it like a man. It is well.

you bleeped up. you shudnt have settled down when you knew that you were not capable. cos u give woman belle, no mean say u must marry her. leave that woman before she sends you to hell

Prospertochu:
I got my girlfriend then now wife pregnant, I wasn't ready for marriage. My plan was to take care of her and my baby while she stays in her father's house, her mother was fine with it as long as I take care of my responsibilities, but everything changed when the scan confirmed that she was carrying triples, her mother said I must marry her because there's no way her daughter will still under her roofs with 3 children.

I pleaded with her to give me sometimes to find my own accommodations because I was living in my father's family house after his demise I stay with his siblings while my mum left with my younger sister.

My mother in law refused saying I must do something fast because she doesn't want people to mocked her that her daughter has gotten pregnant out of wedlock not just with one baby but 3 so I managed to save enough money to get a place for our own but her mother refused saying I must pay her bride price first, I didn't have any more money so i have borrowed from friends and added to the money I had to pay for her bride price. It wasn't a big party just something small, I took my wife to my father family house where we are living now with our triplets but things hasn't been easy for me, taking care of 3 children it's not easy, I am grateful that I am rent free but household bills are killing me.

My wife and I are always arguing because she keeps asking for more money my salary is 55k I use to give her 20k monthly, 10 monthly to my mother and I use 20 and save 5k she said the money wasn't enough that I am stingy, I now started giving her 25k she is still complaining about the money not being enough. I refused giving her more she started staving me of sex and foods. My family are tired of separating us fighting almost every day, my uncle has asked us to leave the compound because we are disturbing there peace and I had to beg him to forgive us that ur shouldn't be happening again and I cautioned my wife but she is threatening to abandon me with the kids. I have told her to do her worse because I am tired of her madness. I wish I never married her in the first, all I could've do is to take care of my kids and let her be I know it's too late now to change the past but what should I do?

Ask Davido.

I feel ur pain,it's not easy at all, just try husslling outside ur job, and again if it's possible let her start up something any how okay, this all I can say.

eniolorunfe:
Why you talk so? Lol

Their prick no dey dey one side. Secondly any small thing their girls will run to their mothers.
I know them

RedSquid:
Baby. Who in the world will take better care of 3 kids than the mother. My dear sit down your turn go soon reach

Prospertochu:
I got my girlfriend then now wife pregnant, I wasn't ready for marriage. My plan was to take care of her and my baby while she stays in her father's house, her mother was fine with it as long as I take care of my responsibilities, but everything changed when the scan confirmed that she was carrying triples, her mother said I must marry her because there's no way her daughter will still under her roofs with 3 children.

I pleaded with her to give me sometimes to find my own accommodations because I was living in my father's family house after his demise I stay with his siblings while my mum left with my younger sister.

My mother in law refused saying I must do something fast because she doesn't want people to mocked her that her daughter has gotten pregnant out of wedlock not just with one baby but 3 so I managed to save enough money to get a place for our own but her mother refused saying I must pay her bride price first, I didn't have any more money so i have borrowed from friends and added to the money I had to pay for her bride price. It wasn't a big party just something small, I took my wife to my father family house where we are living now with our triplets but things hasn't been easy for me, taking care of 3 children it's not easy, I am grateful that I am rent free but household bills are killing me.

My wife and I are always arguing because she keeps asking for more money my salary is 55k I use to give her 20k monthly, 10 monthly to my mother and I use 20 and save 5k she said the money wasn't enough that I am stingy, I now started giving her 25k she is still complaining about the money not being enough. I refused giving her more she started staving me of sex and foods. My family are tired of separating us fighting almost every day, my uncle has asked us to leave the compound because we are disturbing there peace and I had to beg him to forgive us that ur shouldn't be happening again and I cautioned my wife but she is threatening to abandon me with the kids. I have told her to do her worse because I am tired of her madness. I wish I never married her in the first, all I could've do is to take care of my kids and let her be I know it's too late now to change the past but what should I do?

I just pray you don't die before your time. Please send your account number and phone number. I'll send help soon.

Your real problem is not your wife bro but money. Get that and see other things fall in place. God bless you.

so your dick still dey rise despite putting u in d condition you are today?

Prospertochu:
I got my girlfriend then now wife pregnant, I wasn't ready for marriage. My plan was to take care of her and my baby while she stays in her father's house, her mother was fine with it as long as I take care of my responsibilities, but everything changed when the scan confirmed that she was carrying triples, her mother said I must marry her because there's no way her daughter will still under her roofs with 3 children.

I pleaded with her to give me sometimes to find my own accommodations because I was living in my father's family house after his demise I stay with his siblings while my mum left with my younger sister.

My mother in law refused saying I must do something fast because she doesn't want people to mocked her that her daughter has gotten pregnant out of wedlock not just with one baby but 3 so I managed to save enough money to get a place for our own but her mother refused saying I must pay her bride price first, I didn't have any more money so i have borrowed from friends and added to the money I had to pay for her bride price. It wasn't a big party just something small, I took my wife to my father family house where we are living now with our triplets but things hasn't been easy for me, taking care of 3 children it's not easy, I am grateful that I am rent free but household bills are killing me.

My wife and I are always arguing because she keeps asking for more money my salary is 55k I use to give her 20k monthly, 10 monthly to my mother and I use 20 and save 5k she said the money wasn't enough that I am stingy, I now started giving her 25k she is still complaining about the money not being enough. I refused giving her more she started staving me of sex and foods. My family are tired of separating us fighting almost every day, my uncle has asked us to leave the compound because we are disturbing there peace and I had to beg him to forgive us that ur shouldn't be happening again and I cautioned my wife but she is threatening to abandon me with the kids. I have told her to do her worse because I am tired of her madness. I wish I never married her in the first, all I could've do is to take care of my kids and let her be I know it's too late now to change the past but what should I do?

It call Power must change hand

Bro is normal even if you give her 100k a week she will ask for more.
No good one out there, if you understand what I mean.
But your approach to issues matters alot
You have to brain wash your wife, I did same to my wife too, no issues till date no matter what you tell my wife today (negative) about me she will not believe you because of the level of brain wash.

Change your approach

Jeon:
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he's already useless for putting his penis into a person vagina that is not your wife. . results of fornication "

dance to your beat.

Mehnn ion know if na Devu or Baba God but one of them served him and served him cooler full

oceanized25:
Brother erm,your wife is right o...e be like you stingy small.
You give ur wife 20k n later 25k after many argument for the family upkeep...you guys are 4 in number,o wrong nau.
I am single,I don't consider myself as one who spends recklessly at all but uses 40k monthly...but somehow you feel you,wife,n kids should use 25k?
Try raise the money for family upkeep,I think 45k or 50 could be something for a prudent woman considering you don't have much.

I hate to see people like u.

jaszplus12:
The old saying "look before you leap" is always forgotten when lust overtakes humans!
Once I advices a total stranger: don't stay under your father's roof, eating your mother's soup and have a girlfriend. It's not proper. If you can kiss a girl, then, leave home, earn yourself some work and cash then you can get all you need from a woman....and when events become challenging...you will man up!
The guy thanked me, took my number and a year later called to thank me again...he had started a great life for himself.
Well, already you have stumbled...you now have to offer greater sacrifice to stabilize your family.
Why not diminish your mom's stipend by half for a while and add to your family expenses.
Get a small table for your wife to trade for now to augment the cash you give her then spread your tentacles into other things...it won't be easy, and that's why I said you're going to offer greater sacrifice.... when things stabilize, reward your Mom for her understanding....
Be brave... when the going gets tough...the tough get......

Stop making it look like only a man needs to sort himself before getting entangled with the opposite sex. How about women sorting themselves out before getting entangled? If the said wife did, then she wouldn't be stressing the poor man's life. Since she wasn't raped and got pregnant with those kids out of her own selfishness, she should equally bear the brunt of raising them. HTTP v

Prospertochu:
I got my girlfriend then now wife pregnant, I wasn't ready for marriage. My plan was to take care of her and my baby while she stays in her father's house, her mother was fine with it as long as I take care of my responsibilities, but everything changed when the scan confirmed that she was carrying triples, her mother said I must marry her because there's no way her daughter will still under her roofs with 3 children.

I pleaded with her to give me sometimes to find my own accommodations because I was living in my father's family house after his demise I stay with his siblings while my mum left with my younger sister.

My mother in law refused saying I must do something fast because she doesn't want people to mocked her that her daughter has gotten pregnant out of wedlock not just with one baby but 3 so I managed to save enough money to get a place for our own but her mother refused saying I must pay her bride price first, I didn't have any more money so i have borrowed from friends and added to the money I had to pay for her bride price. It wasn't a big party just something small, I took my wife to my father family house where we are living now with our triplets but things hasn't been easy for me, taking care of 3 children it's not easy, I am grateful that I am rent free but household bills are killing me.

My wife and I are always arguing because she keeps asking for more money my salary is 55k I use to give her 20k monthly, 10 monthly to my mother and I use 20 and save 5k she said the money wasn't enough that I am stingy, I now started giving her 25k she is still complaining about the money not being enough. I refused giving her more she started staving me of sex and foods. My family are tired of separating us fighting almost every day, my uncle has asked us to leave the compound because we are disturbing there peace and I had to beg him to forgive us that ur shouldn't be happening again and I cautioned my wife but she is threatening to abandon me with the kids. I have told her to do her worse because I am tired of her madness. I wish I never married her in the first, all I could've do is to take care of my kids and let her be I know it's too late now to change the past but what should I do?

You cannot raise triplets on a 55k salary! Period!
The issue is not from your wife. The issue is that you need to quickly ramp up your earnings, rent your own house and give your wife and kids a home!

How can you keep your wife in a family compound with uncles and relations around?

Kestolove:
with triplet u still want to fvck and u only give 25k per month..some men are useless walahi

shut tf up

I tire for ur mater aswear... where I go begin advice u? Once child/children comes to the mix, equation don change... bro u are in a mess and na u gats clean ur mess. U de give mother of 3 20/25k?? Hmmm... ur income is low shaa..

My advice, go and do protatectomy!! E go help u las las..

Prospertochu:
I got my girlfriend then now wife pregnant, I wasn't ready for marriage. My plan was to take care of her and my baby while she stays in her father's house, her mother was fine with it as long as I take care of my responsibilities, but everything changed when the scan confirmed that she was carrying triples, her mother said I must marry her because there's no way her daughter will still under her roofs with 3 children.

I pleaded with her to give me sometimes to find my own accommodations because I was living in my father's family house after his demise I stay with his siblings while my mum left with my younger sister.

My mother in law refused saying I must do something fast because she doesn't want people to mocked her that her daughter has gotten pregnant out of wedlock not just with one baby but 3 so I managed to save enough money to get a place for our own but her mother refused saying I must pay her bride price first, I didn't have any more money so i have borrowed from friends and added to the money I had to pay for her bride price. It wasn't a big party just something small, I took my wife to my father family house where we are living now with our triplets but things hasn't been easy for me, taking care of 3 children it's not easy, I am grateful that I am rent free but household bills are killing me.

My wife and I are always arguing because she keeps asking for more money my salary is 55k I use to give her 20k monthly, 10 monthly to my mother and I use 20 and save 5k she said the money wasn't enough that I am stingy, I now started giving her 25k she is still complaining about the money not being enough. I refused giving her more she started staving me of sex and foods. My family are tired of separating us fighting almost every day, my uncle has asked us to leave the compound because we are disturbing there peace and I had to beg him to forgive us that ur shouldn't be happening again and I cautioned my wife but she is threatening to abandon me with the kids. I have told her to do her worse because I am tired of her madness. I wish I never married her in the first, all I could've do is to take care of my kids and let her be I know it's too late now to change the past but what should I do?

An average mom dont have 4 hours sleep at a stretch in the first 12 to 18months of birth of a baby let alone 3 babies. OP, your wife is a super woman.
25k isnt enough for 1 baby let alone 3 babies including the OP's wife and OP. Oga, dont let her have a mental breakdown, i hope youre involved in the home other than go to work and come back. That woman needs HELP! At least, give her 40k with petting oh, and help her out at home too. Double your hustle pls, 55k isnt much for a family of 5 pls, God will intervene. Appreciate her and see her become the babe you chased earlier.


Hope you guys have a sure family planning in place, cos na quadruplets fit follow oh.

Duru9:
Tomorrow this child will be this (Dangote)
Tomorrow this child will be that (Bill gate)
Y'all forgot that the child can still be (bandits, boko haram, ritualist, kidnapper, cultist)

Make una no de bring the idea of tomorrow child fit be this jare



At OP if she wants to leave you with the kids let her go
Get a sister to take care of your kids for you
Atleast you've got kids already no need to marry again just hustle and make sure you provide for them

Unless you too wan dey useless like their mama

Na 'tomorrow e fit be Dangote, tomorrow e fit bill gate' na him be Nigeria population problems.

Poor people go dey pump children yearly in the name of e go be, e go better... Without money to train them... At the end those children go become societal problems.

Probably 85% of marriages in Nigeria are regretted by either person. Nigerians marry for food, shelter, in house sex, clout to say they are married but not normally for love.
Sad but true.

Baba hustle ooo and try to stabilize peace at home so u can be more productive. As for ur wife, the truth is u can't really blame her only the stress of raising a child no be beans talk more 3.. I can't imagine the wahala. At night she's trying to catch some rest after a hard days work of caring for the kids.. baby 1 goes waaaaaaa she gets up to attend to him the second baby starts and third. Breastfeeding wouldn't even be easy. She shouldn't nag but frustration can get the best of us sometimes. Try helping out with little things with the kids when u can make she nor go craze. Chai wahala no dey finish... All the best Op

Kriss216:
A woman you're giving almost 50% of your monthly income and she's still not satisfied is not the right one for you, bro.



Channel your energy, time, finances on your kids. That woman will never give you happiness.

Gbe nu e dake.. When they tell you, use condom, you tell them, withdrawal method is the best. The result is what OP is facing.

Instead, you should proffer solution to the man who can't zipUp.

Prospertochu:
I got my girlfriend then now wife pregnant, I wasn't ready for marriage. My plan was to take care of her and my baby while she stays in her father's house, her mother was fine with it as long as I take care of my responsibilities, but everything changed when the scan confirmed that she was carrying triples, her mother said I must marry her because there's no way her daughter will still under her roofs with 3 children.

I pleaded with her to give me sometimes to find my own accommodations because I was living in my father's family house after his demise I stay with his siblings while my mum left with my younger sister.

My mother in law refused saying I must do something fast because she doesn't want people to mocked her that her daughter has gotten pregnant out of wedlock not just with one baby but 3 so I managed to save enough money to get a place for our own but her mother refused saying I must pay her bride price first, I didn't have any more money so i have borrowed from friends and added to the money I had to pay for her bride price. It wasn't a big party just something small, I took my wife to my father family house where we are living now with our triplets but things hasn't been easy for me, taking care of 3 children it's not easy, I am grateful that I am rent free but household bills are killing me.

My wife and I are always arguing because she keeps asking for more money my salary is 55k I use to give her 20k monthly, 10 monthly to my mother and I use 20 and save 5k she said the money wasn't enough that I am stingy, I now started giving her 25k she is still complaining about the money not being enough. I refused giving her more she started staving me of sex and foods. My family are tired of separating us fighting almost every day, my uncle has asked us to leave the compound because we are disturbing there peace and I had to beg him to forgive us that ur shouldn't be happening again and I cautioned my wife but she is threatening to abandon me with the kids. I have told her to do her worse because I am tired of her madness. I wish I never married her in the first, all I could've do is to take care of my kids and let her be I know it's too late now to change the past but what should I do?

I can spot 2 basic problems here, the first is your finances. 55k/month supporting a family of 5 plus a grandmother is inadequate, your family is living below poverty line. The question is, what are you going to do about it? Remove your wife out of the equation, the situation is still terrible. I will advice you learn a new skill, start a small business, or upgrade your proficiency to increase your earnings.

Secondly, you and your wife need to synergize on your finances. Let it be clear to both parties what the family earns monthly and how it is allocated. The minute she is involved in the decision making she will seldom ask for what you can't provide. Run everything on a budget, where ever kobo goes has to be known. I think it's rather unfair you get 20k, your mum 10k and the remaining 4 people in the family plus yourself get to share 25k.

Bottom line is you got to earn more, start putting your mind to work on how to do this.

I was really touched by your case, hence the following advise:
You're not in the position to be giving people money, your situation needs help. Your family should be helping you for now not the other way round or else your financial status will never improve.
Drop your ego, ask anyone that has child/children the stress they go through in raising them, needless to talk about raising 3 kids all at once. Before going to work in the morning, take part in caring for the triplet, help around the house, lift a little bit of the house chores from your wife.
Spend time to play with your children, baby sit them let your wife rest and see if there will be a change or not.
Your cannot claim to love the children if you don't love their mother.
This is my 2 naira advise, you asked for it.
Wish you wisdom to understand.
Shalom

Righteousness2:
My Brother, what you are Facing right now are the Consequences we get when we decide to leave GOD'S way and go our way.
The Bible says ,
if thou will hearken.. you Expect this.
Likewise there are things we expect when we don't hearken.

Having Said that, you are Married right now so you are Husband and wife.
The Missing link I see in your Home is JESUS. You both need to Genuiely Surrender to JESUS.

You as the Head of the Home could be the link to bring JESUS into your Home.
Personally Surrender to JESUS, do away with all worldly stuff and let her see JESUS in you.

I Tell you she will have no other choice than to Join you and in no time you will see a whole new Home enjoying Peace from above.

u are so annoying.
U troll every post talking about religion. That is really disgusting. U can't offer any real advice. U can't even offer sympathy. U just start talking nonsense. Who does not believe in God? Do u think u are holier than others?

If we check well now, we go see u for one olosho joint every day.

Hypocrite

Slynation:
A whole triplet....This one loud oO

Instead of quarrelling everyday with her, be a man of little words, no matter the level of provocation, do nothing/say nothing, just let it slide....

I'm used to saying "May my preeq never put me into trouble one day" but it has partially landed me into one, one day I will post my own story....!!

Congratulations bro, update us when she gives birth so I can buy at least pamper.

descarado:
I tell you.
Triplets, even for a rich man is quite handful.

25k for a woman with triplets, then his mum 10k.
Ogaa o.
People are already asking what is she doing.
What will a woman with triplets do bikonu?

The only money you need out of your salary is tfare. The rest should go to that lady. For now, she need all the help she can get.
Why are you giving your mum 10k when you all live together? Is she not making her own money? She is rent free.
You should be cooking and eating together.
Wifey will manage the food industry, if mum is idle, she should help take care of the kids and wifey should look for ways to argument. I hope as you are giving your mum, you remembered she too have a mum.

When u start doing the right thing, even with all the stress of taking care of triplets , you will enjoy that lady to the fullest.

@op you should take to this advice

work hard + Surrogate mother + child/ Children at least two + Ur mother takes care of Dem + Creche + Nursery + House maid and cook .No woman Wahala .+ boarding schools +Enjoy life

Dear op,
You can't continue to live your life this way.once the children has stop breastfeeding, take one to your mother, the other to your mother inlaw, then keep one with you.

Then you and your wife will have chance to double your hustle. If you continue like this you may die very soon. Lack of money is the cause of your present predicament and domestic violence. The 25k nor even reach give side chick �

descarado:
I tell you.
Triplets, even for a rich man is quite handful.

25k for a woman with triplets, then his mum 10k.
Ogaa o.
People are already asking what is she doing.
What will a woman with triplets do bikonu?

The only money you need out of your salary is tfare. The rest should go to that lady. For now, she need all the help she can get.
Why are you giving your mum 10k when you all live together? Is she not making her own money? She is rent free.
You should be cooking and eating together.
Wifey will manage the food industry, if mum is idle, she should help take care of the kids and wifey should look for ways to argument. I hope as you are giving your mum, you remembered she too have a mum.

When u start doing the right thing, even with all the stress of taking care of triplets , you will enjoy that lady to the fullest.

I want to give 1000likes to this comment

:I have one advise 4 u sir but I'm currently using it ;

Prospertochu:
I got my girlfriend then now wife pregnant, I wasn't ready for marriage. My plan was to take care of her and my baby while she stays in her father's house, her mother was fine with it as long as I take care of my responsibilities, but everything changed when the scan confirmed that she was carrying triples, her mother said I must marry her because there's no way her daughter will still under her roofs with 3 children.

I pleaded with her to give me sometimes to find my own accommodations because I was living in my father's family house after his demise I stay with his siblings while my mum left with my younger sister.

My mother in law refused saying I must do something fast because she doesn't want people to mocked her that her daughter has gotten pregnant out of wedlock not just with one baby but 3 so I managed to save enough money to get a place for our own but her mother refused saying I must pay her bride price first, I didn't have any more money so i have borrowed from friends and added to the money I had to pay for her bride price. It wasn't a big party just something small, I took my wife to my father family house where we are living now with our triplets but things hasn't been easy for me, taking care of 3 children it's not easy, I am grateful that I am rent free but household bills are killing me.

My wife and I are always arguing because she keeps asking for more money my salary is 55k I use to give her 20k monthly, 10 monthly to my mother and I use 20 and save 5k she said the money wasn't enough that I am stingy, I now started giving her 25k she is still complaining about the money not being enough. I refused giving her more she started staving me of sex and foods. My family are tired of separating us fighting almost every day, my uncle has asked us to leave the compound because we are disturbing there peace and I had to beg him to forgive us that ur shouldn't be happening again and I cautioned my wife but she is threatening to abandon me with the kids. I have told her to do her worse because I am tired of her madness. I wish I never married her in the first, all I could've do is to take care of my kids and let her be I know it's too late now to change the past but what should I do?

Why can't she find something to do at least to assist the family?

I don't understand.

Brotherly, even if you don't have kids, 55K is not enough in this present Nigeria. You need to buckle up, check inwards to see where your strength lies. Be motivated with the future of the kids. Tell yourself, I want to be a good father. I want my kids to see me as one.

Sit your wife down, open up to her. Have heart to heart discussion on how to move things forward. What can she do? If it's biz, how much will she need to start small.? Borrow.. I mean borrow and let her know you borrowed. Keep tabs on the biz.
Communication is key in marriage.

You also should find side hustle. Like the yoruba adage, die omokunrin oto o.